Guardians of Less

by E.M. Megs

He was being punished for his final 25 years. All she knew was that he appeared to her every night in her dreams and seemed to be imaginary. In fact, that's all he was... Until he broke the one of quite a few important rules. - KyoHaru - AU - One-shot

Guardians of Less

By E.M. Megs

(Super-Long) One-shot

She was haunted it seemed. Haunted by some form of a ghost. Or a memory. Though she didn't think that she'd ever known someone quite like him, and she certainly didn't believe in ghosts.

She didn't quite know when it started – or how for that matter. And asking her why just about blew her mind for her to think about. He'd been there as long as she could remember. And he seemed to grow as she did. When she had been a child, so had he. When she was a teen, so was he, though he looked like a slightly more mature one. She'd never really thought anything of it until she turned 21 and realized that dreaming of the same imaginary man practically every night wasn't the least bit normal.

But the thing was, that she really wasn't sure what to make of this discovery. That she seemed to be haunted in some form or another. Was it because her mother had died at an early age? Was this 'imaginary friend' some kind of thought up form of protection to replace her deceased maternal figure?

She didn't know. She really didn't. And she wasn't particularly sure if she ever would.

The first time she could ever remember seeing him had been when she was four. And even that memory was a bit hazy at parts.

But she did remember one thing as clearly as the sunlight that filled her room at that current moment. And that was how he looked.

He was a little boy, about her age but maybe a little older. A refined sort of look to him even though he was only four or five. Like he was being raised in a strict home. Like his parents didn't exactly show him affection on a regular basis.

He had short raven hair. And oddly enough, glasses – even though a four-year-old should hardly need spectacles. They made him look even older, smarter. But for Christ's sake, he was four. Behind those frames were the most haunting, yet entrancing eyes she'd ever seen. Onyx in color, clouded in mystery, floating in space.

He was sitting in a sandbox. Just sitting. Not playing, nor making any move that said that he'd want to play in the sand any time soon. Just sitting.

She felt kind of sorry for him, just sitting there without anyone to play with. He didn't seem to be looking at anything, and when she looked around she noticed that no one else was there except the two of them either.

Cautiously – because her mother had always told her to be careful around strangers no matter how young – she approached him, tilting her little brunette head at him and mumbling, "Do you want to play?"

Slowly, those onyx eyes gazed up at her, blinking once to clear their daze. And he said, "No... I don't think that's what I'm here for." She scowled a little. Then motioned to the sandbox that he was sitting in. "Oh... Did you want to sit too?"

Now she just found him to be the oddest little boy she'd ever met. "No," she stated slowly, "It's a sandbox... It's meant to be played in."

He sighed and carefully pushed himself up off the ground, dusting off the front of his pants in the process. He moved aside, once assured that he was clean, leaving the sandbox clear for her. She blinked, the small frown on her face deepening. Why on earth didn't this boy want to play?

"Don't you know how to play?" she asked, stepping up to stand right in front of him.

He shook his head. "Father says that I shouldn't waste time with silly games."

"But... You're a little kid!"

"I," he emphasized, "happen to be five. I am not little." He seemed to be incredibly insulted.

"Well... I'm four. But Mommy says that I'm still a little girl." She sighed when she noticed that he wasn't really paying attention to her. "Hey," she said, "What's your name?"

"Kyoya," he mumbled, "Kyoya Ohtori."

"Oh... Well... I'm Haruhi Fujioka. Nice to meet you." She bowed swiftly at the waist, a smile on her face.

When she'd woken up from that dream she had run to tell her parents all about the little boy who had become her friend. They smiled and pretended to know what she was talking about. "Every little kid's got to have an imaginary friend at some point," her father had said quietly to her mother one night when they thought she was in bed asleep.

That had been before her mother had died. The first time she remembered seeing him had been before her mother had died. So that meant that he couldn't be thought up to replace her, right? Besides, how in the world could a little boy be a replacement for a mother?

From that point, he appeared to her in her dreams nearly every night. It became routine for her to fall asleep and find herself alone with him. Always alone.

She remembered just after her mom had died when she was five. She'd gone to sleep, crying because her mom wasn't coming home from the hospital. He'd been there. He'd been there, looking at her curiously as if she were a strange creature on exhibit.

"Why're you crying?"

She sniffled pitifully and mumbled a watery, "Daddy says Mommy's not coming home."

He frowned and sat down next to her and the bench she was sitting on. He'd grown to be six now, but still had the same features. Raven hair, onyx eye, and glasses. "What does that mean? Where did she go?"

"She went to the hospital because she was sick... But Daddy says that she's not coming home like we thought she would."

Kyoya's eyes widened a bit as he realized what she was talking about. "You mean... She... Died?" Haruhi just nodded, sobbing some more into her small five-year-old hands. He blinked a few times. "Well," he murmured, "It's not that bad, not having a mother. I haven't had one as long as I can remember."

She looked up at him for a moment with a funny look on her face. "Why...?"

"Fuyumi-oneesan says that she died right after I was born but she still loved me very much." He shrugged nonchalantly and looked back at his shoes. "I think Father hates me though," he added in a whisper, "because I'm here and she's not."

She gasped and shook her head furiously. "No, no! He doesn't hate you! A father rarely ever hates his child!"

"Is that what your father told you?" She nodded. "He lied. Fathers hate their children all the time. Just not all of them." She frowned at the bitterness in his voice. He was so bitter. So bitter and intelligent about practically everything, even though he was only six. It was scary, in a way.

As the years had progressed, he'd become sort of like a crutch for her. A friend that she could lean on, as much as he seemed reluctant to be. He was always the same, cynical, slightly bitter person. No matter what age he was he still had that same calculating look. Some mornings when she was a teenager she'd wake up angry at him for being so cold. On most of those occasions, she didn't dream about him for several days after, then he'd appear again and apologize in the only way he knew how.

When she was fourteen she started to realize just how little she knew about him even though he knew practically everything about her.

"Kyoya... How come you never talk about yourself?"

"Because, I'm not here to talk about myself. I'm here to listen to you."

She frowned a bit, her brown bangs falling into her eyes. "That... Doesn't make sense."

"I'm not real, Haruhi. I'm part of your imagination. I was created so that you could vent to me about anything under the sun." His voice turned slightly sour toward the end, like he preferred to be somewhere else.

She really didn't believe that. He'd always seemed too real to her to be fake. Besides, why would she create someone as cold as him, who wouldn't even hold her when she was crying? And that happened more often than not. He saw the weak side of her. He was probably the only one that she'd ever shown it to besides her father, and she tried to hide it from him even. "I don't believe that, Kyoya."

"Oh?" he retorted with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes... I don't believe that. I've known you since I was four but I only ever see you here, never out there. But that doesn't mean that you aren't real."

After that conversation he hadn't shown himself for a week. She got worried for some reason, thinking that she'd scared him off. But why should she care? If he was gone that meant that he wasn't there to haunt her anymore.

But... Her dreams were empty without him.

And she found that she ultimately hated it – him not being there when she slept. She knew it was silly. He'd outright told her that he wasn't real. That he was a figment of her imagination. But really, in a dream, who ever admits that what they're dreaming isn't real? Who ever says 'I'm dreaming' when they dream? The fact that he denied being real just made him more real to her.

When she was twenty – just before her 21st birthday, she noticed a pattern. When she went to sleep stressed, they'd be in that park they had been in with the sandbox the first time they'd met. When she was tired or scared, they'd be in her bedroom. When she was utterly happy, they'd just be in a nondescript sky, like they were floating as they talked. And, they were always alone. No matter where they were, no one else ever joined them.

"Why are we always alone?" she asked.

"Would you prefer there be other people around to hear all the silly things that you tell me about?" he retorted in that same cool tone of his. They were in her bedroom this time. She pursed her lips at his tone. He sighed under his breath and murmured, "Fine. We're always alone, because no one else can see me. I told you, I'm not real. I'm only real to you."

"Well then... Why is it always the park or my bedroom?" She flopped down on the bed as she spoke, hearing him approach to lean over and stare her in the face.

"Why do you seem to have so many questions?"

"Why won't you just answer outright for once?"

"Why don't you just stop asking things that I'm not allowed to answer?"

"Why aren't you allowed to answer?" She sat up and glared at him. He stared back calmly through the same wire-framed spectacles.

"Why do you need to know?"

She growled with frustration. "Fine. You don't want to answer, I'll just leave," she muttered angrily, storming out of the room. As soon as she left, she woke up, just as angry with him as she had been in the dream. "Why are you there, but not here?" she whispered to the empty room.

And that's where she was now. Two weeks later, on her 21st birthday in the middle of a storm alone. She hadn't seen him since then. She shuddered as another clap of thunder sounded over her apartment. She hated storms. She was afraid of thunder and lightening. She had always been, and now that she realized she was truly alone for this one, she also noticed that Kyoya had always been there when she was scared of a storm.

She shut her eyes, curling up under her blankets and trying to block out the light and noise. Before she knew it, she was asleep, dreaming of the storm instead of living it.

She shuddered again, feeling another bout of thunder shake her room. "Kyoya," she whispered, feeling helpless and stupid for even thinking that he'd come. For even needing him. She didn't need him. She didn't. But then, why did she feel so helpless and confused when he wasn't there? "Kyoya!"

"Haruhi?"

"Kyoya!" She could feel the tears coming down her face now. She was scared. More scared than she ever had been before. She heard soft footfalls closing in on the bed where she was huddled. The blanket lifted moments later. She stared up at him where he stood, in all of his 22-year-old glory. He gazed down at her, a look on his face that she'd never seen before. "I'm... scared."

He swallowed a moment then murmured, "It's only thunder, Haruhi." He sat down under the blanket regardless.

Yet another thunder clap drove her to cling to him. At first, he didn't react at all besides the sharp intake of breath. Then she mumbled into his shirt, "I thought you were gone. On my birthday of all days."

A slightly irritated sigh fell from his lips as he wrapped his arms around her petite frame, holding her close. He never did anything like this. He'd never held her before. Normally, just his presence was enough to stave off her fear. It surprised her even more when he whispered into her hair, "I'd never leave you."

She was shocked into silence at that moment, no longer scared. Then, of course, he ruined the tender moment by adding, "I wouldn't be able to leave even if I wanted to though, I suppose. I'm not allowed."

She growled in annoyance and shoved away from him at once. He chuckled a bit in response, pulling her back toward him. "I never said that I wanted to leave."

"You always seem so irritated with me though."

"Doesn't mean that I want to leave." She sighed and pushed her face further into his shoulder as thunder rolled again, this time in the distance. "I apologize for not answering your questions," he stated carefully, "But I'm really not allowed."

"Not allowed by who?"

He swallowed, thinking for a moment, then shook his head. "I'm not allowed to say that either." By this point she was becoming thoroughly irritated with the man and grumbled something under her breath about 'damn imaginary bastard.' He chuckled again. "I really wish I could tell you, but I can't."

"Why?"

"It's beyond your comprehension, Haruhi."

"I don't care. I want to know, dammit."

He let out a short breath and said softly, "I can tell you... That I'm here to protect you, as full of bull that sounds."

"You're right... It does sound like it's a bunch of bull. How the hell can you protect me if you aren't real as you claim not to be?"

"Like I said, it's beyond your comprehension."

She sighed, resigning to the fact that she'd probably never find out what the hell he meant by anything. "Why do I even need protection?" she muttered, mostly to herself. "I'm a freaking law student."

"People have needed protection for less."

"But I'm not that important."

"Future, Haruhi."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

He smirked and shook his head in classic Kyoya manner. "Go to sleep, Haruhi. I'm not leaving any time soon, I promise."

"I think you forget that I'm already asleep, Kyoya." In all honesty, she didn't want to go to sleep in the dream. When she woke up, she knew that he'd be gone. She didn't know when she'd gotten so needy. She didn't see it as needy though. He was a constant she could count on, that was all. When that constant disappeared, it freaked her out.

Something akin to a smile lit up his face while his eyes held that same look they'd had earlier when he'd first arrived. He readjusted himself to lie down, still holding her in his arms. "Go to sleep," he commanded firmly. She turned around so her back was to his chest. His chin rested on top of her head, which was partially using one of his arms as a pillow. She sighed and decided to follow his orders since he was supposedly 'protecting' her. Her eyes fluttered shut just as his voice breathed, "Happy birthday, Haruhi."

Haruhi's eyes popped open almost immediately, his voice still ringing in her ears and the warmth of his arms still surrounding her. She blinked the sleep from her eyes, realizing for what must have been the first time, that her alarm clock was going off loudly. She fumbled to find the off button for a few seconds until it fell silent.

She was about to pull herself out of bed to get ready for her classes until she realized that it was Saturday. She groaned and fell back on her bed, wishing she could go back to sleep. But, unfortunately, she knew that when Kyoya told her to wake up it meant that something was going to happen that she would want to be awake for.

And, as if on cue, the doorbell rang. She sighed and tugged the blankets on her aside so she could get her feet on the floor. She wobbled a bit when she first stood up but steadied herself quickly, hurrying to the door of her small apartment.

Opening the door revealed her mischievous twin best friends. Haruhi suppressed the groan that wanted to fall from her lips seeing their identical Cheshire grins. "What're you two doing here?" She scowled.

"What are we ever doing here?" they retorted in perfect harmony.

She shut her eyes to block out an incoming headache. "I'm not modeling for you again. So don't even think about it."

"We weren't thinking about it, were we Kaoru?" one replied.

"Nope," the other answered his twin promptly, "We were just wondering if you wanted to go to breakfast with your best friends...?" Both of them seemed to lean in a bit, as if waiting for an answer. She stared at them both blankly.

"I... suppose. Where though? I'm kind of tight on cash."

"We'll pay!" they chimed.

"Come on in while I change," she mumbled, opening the door a bit wider and retreating back into the apartment. The two red-heads let themselves in, taking off their shoes standing idly in the living room like they normally did.

She sighed as she re-emerged from the bedroom, pulling a brush through her hair in the process. They both smirked at her. "So, Haruhi," Hikaru started with a grin.

"What have you been up to?" Kaoru finished with an identical one. She glanced at them as she looked for the right pair of shoes by the door.

"Are you implying that I've been up to something?"

"Well," they both chorused with drawn out vowels, "You did seem kind of flustered when you answered the door."

"Almost like you just woke up."

"And you never sleep in unless you're sick."

She narrowed her eyes at them. "And...?"

"Was someone else here?"

"No," she stated clearly, "Why would someone else be here?" She slipped on her black flats while they snuck back to her bedroom, still suspicious. She rolled her eyes and waited for them to quell their curiosity. They probably thought that she was seeing someone without telling them. Which was ridiculous. She put her studies before any kind of relationship. "If you're looking for evidence that you're right you won't find any!" she called, "Let's go!"

–

That night she didn't dream of Kyoya, but oddly enough that didn't bother her a bit. Instead her dreams were filled with clouds and people.

The people wore white robes that seemed to glow while the cloud seem to flit around them. Some of them had black insignia's on the front of their robes but she couldn't read what they said. She stared around her, wondering where she had managed to land herself.

If she had to describe it, she would have called it mystical. Until the people wearing white started looking at her. And the way they looked wasn't all that hospitable. She blinked, noticing their glares and the few that were whispering.

It started to look a bit less mystical and quite a bit more hostile. She backed away from the spot she'd been standing in for as long as she'd been there. 'Where am I?' A hand grabbed her arm while a gruff voice growled in her ear, "What are you doing here?" She spun around to face the owner of the voice and found that it was Kyoya.

"I... don't know," she mumbled, "When I went to sleep... I found myself here. I don't know how I got here." She looked him over, noting that he wore a white robe like the others. One with a black insignia on it.

"You shouldn't be here."

"Kyoya!" a third voice yelled. She looked in the direction it came from at the same time he did. His face straightened a great deal, almost filling with dread. "What the hell is she doing here?"

"I have no clue, Sir. But I assure you, it won't happen again..." He pulled her by the arm quickly away from everything. His other hand covering her eyes. "You're not allowed to be here, Haruhi. I don't know how you managed to get through, but you'll be in grave danger if it happens again."

She swallowed, unable to see him but still sensing that he was angry. Or upset. He could have been upset. When he uncovered her eyes he was in his regular clothing and they were in her room. "Kyoya... What was that place?"

"It doesn't matter. You're to forget you ever saw it. You hear me? Forget about it."

"But... I don't understand..."

"Trust me. It's better if you just forget that you ever made it there."

"I don't want to forget it... It was beautiful. Is that where you live?"

"Haruhi! Forget about it or I'll have to make you!" She blinked at the pained urgency in his voice. Emotions that he rarely showed, now were seen clearly on his face. She kept blinking as she gazed into his face, for once, realizing that he wasn't normal. That it was possible he wasn't necessarily human.

"What are you...?"

He shut his eyes and turned away from her. "You leave me no choice." When he turned back to her she didn't get the chance to react before he threw some kind of powder in her face and whispered some foreign words under his breath. "I'm sorry, Haruhi."

When she woke she remembered nothing. Her dreams were completely black. But she still felt like there was something missing.

–

"Did something happen last night?" she asked him softly, her fingers tugging at the cloth bracelet on her wrist. She felt like she shouldn't be asking anything of him and it made her nervous. But it was nagging her not to ask. He seemed to be avoiding her all evening. Avoiding her touch, avoiding her eyes, just avoiding her in general. He looked away before answering with a solid, "No. Why would have?"

"I just... feel like there's something missing. Like some block of my memory's missing."

"Nothing happened last night, Haruhi. I assure you. I wasn't even here last night. You slept dreamless."

"Are you positive?"

"Absolutely."

She looked down again. "May I ask... about your family?"

He stiffened. For a moment she thought that he'd refuse. Then he chuckled a bit and murmured, "You never cease to surprise me, Haruhi. Yes, you may." He ran a hand through his hair and looked at her side-ways. "My father was a businessman," he finally started, "A ruthless businessman who some said had a cold heart made of stone. He didn't do anything that didn't give him some kind of merit. He had one weakness though... And that was my mother."

"What was she like?" Haruhi asked softly, moving closer to him and drawing her knees to her chest, hugging them.

"Beautiful," Kyoya whispered, "Kind. Loving. Practically the exact opposite of my father. Or so my sister said."

"Siblings?"

"Two brothers and a sister. I was the youngest."

She frowned, now noticing the past tense that he was using. "Are they... dead?"

He let out a breath and nodded. "Yes... Yes they are. Mother died only days after I was born. The others later." The sympathy in her eyes tore at his heart. He couldn't keep lying to her like this. It hurt enough as it was.

"I'm... sorry. Why didn't you ever tell me when the rest of your family died?"

"It wasn't important." He looked away again, guilt practically tearing his insides apart. "Haruhi."

"Hmm?"

"Do you ever feel like... Like you're all alone? Like no one understands?"

She nodded. "All the time. Most of the time I'm not actually alone though. You're proof enough of that." He bobbed his head in recognition, finally looking her in the eyes. "What's troubling you?" He swallowed and shook his head, leaning in closer to her.

"Everything, Haruhi. Everything's troubling me," he breathed, "But it's not important. The only important thing is that you're safe." He let out a long breath and mumbled, "Time for bed."

"Why do you always say that?"

"What?"

"That my safety's more important than anything. And then you always say that it's time for bed just when I think I'm getting you to talk to me properly." He looked away from her again. She knew something was off. Terribly off. "Kyoya, talk to me. What's wrong? You can tell me anything. I promise."

He shut his eyes, swallowed down the emotions that threatened to break through his barrier. "I say it because your safety is more important than anything else. I say it because you're meant to be someone amazing. Haruhi, I say it because I care so much about you that your safety is the only thing that matters to me." His onyx eyes opened to pierce into her chocolate ones. "I say it, because you are the only thing that matters."

He'd never admitted as much as that before. She stared at him for a moment. "You don't mean that."

"Yes. I do."

Her eyes popped open with the first rays of light streaming through her window. She groaned. He'd just begun to open up to her for Christ's sake! She was so angry she would have screamed if she didn't have to get ready for class.

"This conversation is not over, Kyoya," she hissed under her breath, wishing he could hear it.

But he couldn't. After all... He wasn't real.

–

Kyoya felt like he was about to break by the time he finally managed to make her wake up. When his own eyes opened he cursed himself for showing so much emotion so openly. And he had a feeling that if, God forbid, he hadn't been able to wake her when he did, he would have succumbed to the affection that he seemed to have grown for her over the years of watching over her.

He'd been so close to just blurting out what he was. Damn the Council. Damn them to hell. Damn them for ever making the rule that said he wasn't allowed to tell Haruhi anything. Damn them for outlawing him from falling in love with her. Damn them for pushing a punishment like this on him.

"This conversation is not over, Kyoya." He heard her voice in his mind. Just another part of his job as her protector. Hearing her voice in his head always made an uncontrolled shudder run down his spine though – a feeling that he would have thought that he would get used to after being around her so long.

As he lay in his own bed across the city from where she was, he also got the feeling that it wasn't going to get any easier.

–

He lived in a household with two older gentlemen named Mitsukuni Hanizuka and Takashi Morinazuka. Cousins who had somehow ended up having the same job as him, though they did it for a different purpose.

"Ne, Kyo-chan... Have you seen Tama-chan lately?" Hunny asked with a small smile. Kyoya nearly choked on his coffee and proceeded into a coughing fit.

"No," he rasped when he finally got control of himself again, "Why would I?" He coughed a bit more and cleared his throat, hesitating to take another gulp of his coffee in case the small blonde said something else that would make him spit up his coffee.

"He's been one of us longer than you have, Kyo-chan..."

The raven-haired man snorted. "Only by six years."

"He's going to be on his 5th in a few months," Mori intoned in his quiet stoic voice.

"Good for him. Congratulations on his fifth. May I hope that I never get that far in this damn 'career.'" He lifted his coffee mug in a kind of salute, a slight grimace on his face. For a second, he wished that it was alcohol that he was about to chug. Hunny looked sad for a moment then he perked up again as he dove into the slice of cake that Mori placed in front of him. After a few bites he seemed to get a bit nervous.

"We... Erm...Kind of... Told the Council that he could live with us."

The look on Kyoya's face would have made practically anyone turn to stone. Not Hunny though. He just gave a sheepish little grin as the younger boy tried to keep a cap on his temper. "What?"

"You haven't talked to him since 1907 have you?"

"No," he muttered stiffly, sorely wishing that he could redirect the conversation somewhere else. "1913..."

Hunny sighed and shook his head. "We have rein over this place," he murmured, "He's staying here. We think it'll be good for the two of you to start talking again. Right, Takashi?"

"Ah."

Kyoya grumbled something under his breath about meddling roommates and damn Council members. "I've got to get to 'work,'" he growled, standing. He left his half-drunken cup of coffee sitting on the table, suddenly finding it vastly unappealing. It wasn't because he hated Tamaki... It was just that after what had happened in 1907 everything was incredibly awkward for them when they happened to meet.

Living in the same house as the man...? No. That didn't bode well with him.

–

"The conversation from last night is not over, Kyoya," Haruhi stated sternly with a scowl clear on her face. He should know that she wasn't pleased with how her dream from the night before had ended. She sat across from him on her bed, leaning forward intently.

"I never said it was," he retorted lightly, holding in his own scowl. Surely she would have forgotten in her busy, busy day. He could have only hoped that she would have forgotten. But of course, she was Haruhi, so she hadn't.

"You didn't mean anything that you said. I know you didn't. You aren't the mushy emotional type."

"Who said?"

"Kyoya, you just aren't." She stared at him pointedly but her gentle smile overrode her slightly frightening look.

He shrugged. Let her think that then. It was probably for the better if she did. "And what would you say if I said that I meant every word of it?"

"I'd say... That you were lying."

"I don't lie, Haruhi. You know that I don't."

She sighed. She knew that he didn't. Not once had he ever lied to her that she knew of. "There's a first for everything?" He just gave her a small smile and moved to stand. She quickly grabbed his arm though and mumbled, "Stay."

"I... wasn't going anywhere but the window," he replied with a gentle laugh at her jumpiness.

"Why were you so eager to have me wake up, anyway?" She was fiddling with her bracelet again.

He shook his head. "You wouldn't understand, Haruhi."

"Try me."

He sighed, running a hand through his hair and staring at his lap for a moment before looking up at her again. She was smiling like always. That same smile that always made him want to melt. "I'm not the most emotional person... I was simply afraid that I'd lose it."

"Would it be such a bad thing if you did...?" she let her question linger as he inhaled sharply, once again looking anywhere but at her. She was doing it again. Making him lose control. "Kyoya," she murmured, "Would it be bad?"

"Catastrophic," he breathed.

"Why?"

He tried to breathe deeply and control himself. She made things so difficult with her damn questions. He swallowed when she leaned even further toward him. Dammit, he could smell her strawberry-scented shampoo. That alone was almost enough for him to lose it drastically. "If you only knew what's planned for you," he muttered, finding himself drawn close enough to her that he was nose-to-nose with her. He shut his eyes, feeling her breath on his lips.

She really had no clue what she did to him, he thought begrudgingly. He let out a soft sigh and thought to himself, damn the Council. He might as well do something he wanted to for the first time in nearly 100 years.

And with that he pushed his lips to hers.

She gasped, drawing back slightly out of shock. She blinked a few times, staring him directly in the eyes like she was searching for something. She must have found it because seconds later she kissed him back. His hand slid from where it rested in his lap to cradle her cheek in his palm, pulling her closer with his other arm that snaked around her back.

Her arms gently wrapped around his neck, her fingers tangling in his hair, as he coaxed her down on her back. A soft moan reverberated from her throat when his tongue hesitantly prodded to be allowed entrance. The moan was what knocked Kyoya back to his senses. He knew the possibilities of what could happen because of his actions and that thought alone made him jerk away. "Go to sleep," he told her roughly after standing and turning his back to her.

She didn't get mad like he would have expected practically anyone else. Instead she silently did as she was told. "You'll still be here, right?" she asked quietly as she settled down.

"Of course," he replied, gazing out her bedroom window with a frown on his face. He really shouldn't have done that. He could practically hear his superiors yelling at him already. That may have been the stupidest move ever – besides 1907 of course – regardless of what he may have decided beforehand.

He turned his gaze back to the woman who was drifting off to sleep in the bed though and convinced himself that maybe, just maybe, she was worth it.

"Kyoya?" Her voice was drowsy when she spoke again.

"Hmm?" He strode over to the bedside, kneeling down next to her bed and taking her hand in his. She cracked her eyes open a bit tiredly.

"You'll tell me everything eventually, right?"

He chuckled a bit lowly in his throat and muttered, "Yes. Eventually I'll tell you everything."

He watched her fall asleep, feeling a bit drowsy himself. He was positive that he intended on keeping that promise no matter what the repercussions.

–

April 8th every 20 years or so was a day that Kyoya always seemed to dread. It was the day that he always at least saw his best friend – if he could still call him that. Thus, when he woke up from a splendid night of avoiding Haruhi's questions successfully, he was not too pleased to find a giant head of blonde hair in his face.

"Tamaki," he growled in a low voice, glaring up at the blonde.

"Kyoya!"

How the hell this man could be so cheerful in the morning was beyond him. Let alone cheerful and happy with him. "What the hell do you want Tamaki?"

"Aren't you going to wish me a happy birthday?"

"Oh yeah... Which one is this? Your sixth first?" His tone was cold but dammit, he was tired. Tamaki pretended to look hurt. "Get out. I was working when I was so rudely awakened. Haruhi's probably wondering why the hell I made her wake up so soon."

The idiot just grinned widely. "Is that the name of your fourth?"

"Yes. Now I think I already told you to get out."

"You're never this irritated when I interrupt... What's so special about her?" His eyes narrowed.

Kyoya rolled his eyes and reluctantly pulled himself out of bed. "What gives you the authority to butt into my life?"

"Afterlife," he corrected quickly.

"And how the hell can you be so happy about everything?" Kyoya scowled. Even after everything. Not speaking to each other for nearly 100 years, only seeing each other about every 20, he still found a reason to be pleased with him. How? This man mad absolutely no sense to him. "Also, some hell of an afterlife this is." His scowl deepened further. Really, he hated his job more with every passing day. More specifically, the rules. "I'm guessing you're here to stay."

"Yup!"

Kyoya glowered at him a moment then grumbled under his breath.

"Y'know... I forgave you about 90 years ago, Kyoya," the blonde murmured, patting him lightly on the shoulder before leaving.

"Doesn't mean I've forgiven myself," Kyoya muttered to the empty room after he'd left.

–

Nights with Haruhi were normally pleasant. Neither of them spoke of the kiss and she still asked questions like crazy but they were still pleasant. "When are you going to start telling me things, Kyoya?" she grumbled, frowning at him. It was August for Pete's sake and he hadn't said a thing!

"When I feel like telling you."

"You promised." She pointed a finger at his nose, craning her neck to look at him from where her head was rested on his shoulder. He chuckled and pecked the tip of her finger with his lips. She made a face.

"I did promise. And I'll keep it in due time. Just have patience. If you ask the right questions then I might answer them."

She scowled at him and muttered, "Fine... When did you get your first girlfriend."

He had to keep himself from laughing at the ridiculousness of her question. She was seriously asking him that? "Haruhi, my first girlfriend was my wife."

She froze, her entire body stiffening. "You're married?"

"Was. She died." He failed to mention that he was currently on his 5th life but he didn't think that was necessary information at that moment.

"How long ago did she die?"

He shrugged. "Couple years." 'More like 102,' he thought to himself.

"Children?"

"One. A son. He died when he was three."

"I'm sorry," she mumbled. Her eyes, so filled with sympathy again, tore at him. He didn't want her to be sympathetic towards his past life. "Wait... So you're 22 and you've already been married once with a 3-year-old son?" He nodded. "Did you get married when you were 18 or something?"

"Something like that..."

"How'd they died?"

He let out a short breath of annoyance. "Now that is a long story."

"Tell the short version and I'll tell you if I want to hear the long one."

He ran a hand through his hair, glancing side-ways at her, slightly eager, face. "Alright... Lynette committed suicide and Yoru died in a car accident two years after her."

She stared at him, looking kind of shocked. "Your wife... killed herself?" She sounded slightly skeptical.

"Yes. Don't believe me?" Haruhi just raised an eyebrow. He sighed and struggled to get into his pocket for his wallet. When he had it he pulled out the picture of his family portrait that was in black and white. "That's Lynette," he murmured, pointing to the dark-haired brunette between himself and his sister. "And she's holding Yoru."

"Why's it black and white?"

"We were an old-fashioned couple," he lied drily. It was no use telling her now that he was born in 1888 and died in 1913. That would probably only freak her out.

"You look... Happy."

"I was."

She pursed her lips a moment, frowning at the photo. Then she handed it back to him and said, "I want the full story."

He chuckled and shook his head. His memories were already making his heart ache. "Not tonight. Tomorrow. I'll tell you tomorrow, I promise. Right now you need to go to sleep."

She grumbled some more and muttered, "Whatever. One more question though..."

"Hmm?"

"Did you love her?"

He swallowed back the lump in his throat and barely managed to rasp a quiet, "Yes."

–

"It's tomorrow, Kyoya." She was being oddly patient, even though she must have been bursting with anticipation.

"I know," he murmured, shifting her a bit in his arms so he was more comfortable.

"Is it painful to talk about?"

"Not really anymore. Of course I haven't talked about it for awhile." He pushed up his glasses, the only sign that he was a bit apprehensive to share this bit about him with her. What if it scared her away? 'Preposterous,' the sensible bit of his brain said, 'She's hardly scared of anything more than thunder.'

"Well...?"

He sighed and shut his eyes, leaning his head back on the headboard of her bed. "My best friend, Tamaki, was engaged to her before he even knew that I had feelings for her. She'd always been a good friend to both of us and I was going to let the fool have her." He could feel Haruhi's intense gaze boring a hole in his head. "A few months before his and Lynette's wedding, we had a rather major disagreement." He swallowed, this part being the one that he hated voicing. "I ended up killing him. On accident of course."

"How...?"

"I pushed him a little too hard in my anger, he stumbled back into a suit of armor. The sword went straight through his heart." He shook his head quickly, trying to rid himself of images from years ago. "When Lynette found out she was devastated... I married her instead of Tamaki." He glanced down at her. She looked pale. "Haruhi, are you alright?"

"Fine," she muttered, tearing her gaze away from him. "Continue..."

He chuckled wryly. She really wasn't going to let him out of telling the entire story. "I tried to make her happy. I was there for her as much as I could be with my father pressuring me with business manners. She had Yoru after we'd been married for about a year. She wasn't happy though. No matter how hard I tried, she was never happy. It just got worse after Yoru was born. She all but burst into tears when she held or nursed him.

"She killed herself on what would have been Tamaki's birthday. I always thought she was a strong woman but apparently she wasn't strong enough to deal with the death of the love of her life." His voice grew bitter. He still couldn't stand that he'd killed his best friend and caused the death of his wife. "I haven't forgiven myself for either of their deaths. Probably never will."

"And your son?"

"Hmm... That's rather simple. I took care of him for two years. One day we were driving and I lost control of the car. It flipped twice and landed in the river. I managed to get out and tried to get Yoru out but when I finally did he was already dead. Drowned." Truthfully, that had also been how he'd died. He kept his mouth shut about it though and pushed his nose into her hair, squeezing her slight form to his. "You're the first woman that I've cared about since Lynette, Haruhi," he murmured.

She hummed lightly in response, tilting her head back enough to be nose-to-nose with him. "Tragic," she finally said quietly. Instead of looking frightened at being in the arms of an apparent killer, she was completely calm, actually smiling a small sympathetic smile. He could see the hesitation in her eyes right before she brushed her lips against his – the first time since February. "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. It was my fault."

"No... I'm sorry that such horrible things happened to someone like you." She kissed him again and all his control slipped.

–

Kyoya's eyes fluttered open and he breathed in deeply. He was in such deep shit now. Horridly deep shit. And he doubted that even Tamaki could dig him out of this one. He really couldn't believe what had just happened. The Council was going to have his head. His father more specifically. "Dammit," he cursed when he heard Tamaki on the other side of the door yelling for him.

"Council wants to see you, Kyoya!" The door to his bedroom swung open.

"Shit."

"I can't figure out why they'd want to see you now though!" Tamaki was just as cheery as he always had been in the morning.

"I don't know," he muttered sarcastically, "Maybe it's because I fell in love with her and she apparently returns my feelings?"

Tamaki stopped. "Did you...?" He nodded miserably. This was bad. Not only was his father going to kill him, he may even lose his job – not that that was such a bad thing but the alternative was worse. "Well... Good luck! I'm sure everything will be fine!"

Kyoya glowered at Tamaki's optimism. No, everything would not be fine. No matter how much he wanted it to be, it wouldn't. And it was his fault. He pulled on his robe at the door and stepped out the door of the house. A short walk later he was standing in front of the Council Hall. He steeled his nerves and schooled his face before stepping into the building. "Ah, Kyoya..." Yuzuru Suoh greeted pleasantly, "Your father and the rest of the Council are waiting for you. I'll be joining them in a moment."

He still hadn't figured out how his father had gotten a place on the Council. Or even how he'd gotten the job. Perhaps it was a punishment like it was for him. That would make sense, but not the Council member part.

He trudged to the main hall, calmly regarding the men sitting behind desks in a semi-circle. They all wore purple robes incredibly different from the white and black one he wore. His father was the only one standing, clad in a pale purple. "Kyoya."

"Father. I assume that you're about to remove my guardianship over Haruhi."

"That would be a correct assumption." Yoshio paused. "Except that wouldn't be enough of a punishment for you. You'd still be able to visit her."

"This entire damn job is supposed to be a punishment," Kyoya growled with ice. "Isn't that what I get for accidentally killing his son?" He shoved a finger at the brunette that just walked through the door. "I have three years until my punishment is up and I can either be reborn or move on."

"As punishment for your most recent fiasco, for those last three years you're going to suffer as much as can be allowed. First though, questions. Is it true that you broke the most forbidden rule?"

"Which one? There's about 100," he muttered with utter sarcasm.

"Did you have a sexual relationship with her?"

"Yes. But it wasn't like it wasn't consensual."

"It's still forbidden, son."

"Don't call me your son," Kyoya snapped, "You've hated me since the day I was born. Don't even dare to call me your son. Fuyumi was the one that practically raised me! Is it such a horrible thing that I finally care about someone who cares about myself in the same way?"

"It's forbidden, as you well know."

"You're just set on destroying every chance I have at happiness aren't you?" he muttered in bewilderment, staring at his father with a mix of loathing and hatred. "Who did you even bribe to get on the Council? You've been here 50 years less than I have."

"Enough!" A new voice added itself into the mix, the oldest member. The one who'd practically created the entire organization. Kyoya bowed his head quickly, staring directly at the ground. "You are not the first, Kyoya," his voice grew weaker and frail again now that he didn't have to shout over anyone. "And I believe it's fair to do the same as we've done for the others..."

–

Nothing but dread filled him when he saw Haruhi. Just seeing her, looking so happy and free. She held her arms open to embrace him but he shook his head and pushed her away. She faltered and murmured, "Kyoya... Are you alright?"

"No," he muttered. He swallowed back the lump in his throat, shutting his eyes to gather his thoughts and harden his expression. "It was a mistake, Haruhi. I knew we shouldn't have. I lost control."

"What...?"

"You'll never see me again."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"I have to leave. I'm sorry."

"You've always been here though..."

"I can't anymore. I can't."

"Can't or won't?"

"Both."

She looked hurt for a split second before turning away from him. He closed his eyes. "Leave then. If it meant nothing, just leave."

"Haruhi..."

"Get out!" He barely heard the added whisper of: "So foolish to fall in love..." Her hand raised to her eyes to do what he assumed was wipe tears from her eyes.

"Haruhi, I meant every word of everything I ever said to you before. If it were my choice..." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He figured that he may as well tell her everything if he didn't want to ruin his entire relationship with her. "For Christ's sake, Haruhi. If it were my choice I'd be out there with you." Her entire body stiffened. "It's the damn Council that's doing this."

"Council of what?" she shot back. She seemed doubtful. Like she thought he was making the entire thing up.

"Guardians." She raised a single eyebrow at him, confusion written on every single one of her features. "You remember when I told you about Lynette and Yoru?" She nodded slowly. "I married Lynette when I was 21. When I was 22 we had Yoru, 23 when Lynette committed suicide, and 25 when Yoru died."

"But... You're 22 now..."

He stepped forward and took his hands firmly. "I know it's hard to understand," he muttered, "But when Yoru drowned in that crash, so did I. I was born on November 22, 1888 and died on August 15, 1913."

"That's... not possible. That's... 96 years ago today."

"Exactly. This is my 5th life, but it's not truly on earth. When I died, they made me a Guardian as punishment for killing Tamaki. I'm your Guardian, Haruhi. I'm meant to protect you from anything that might come your way."

"Why me?"

"Because you're destined to be someone great."

"You have to leave though..."

"Yes. It's forbidden for a Guardian to fall in love with his charge. And that's exactly what I did. So they're forbidding me to see you ever again. I'll still be watching over you, though. Always. Just remember that."

She nodded as he pulled her to him. "So... In a way you're a spirit?"

"Yes," Kyoya chuckled, "That's exactly how I'd say it." He pressed his lips to her forehead and added a soft, "You need to sleep."

She shook her head furiously and whispered, "No I don't. I can just stay asleep forever and never wake up."

"Haruhi... Go to sleep." Without waiting for another protest he lifted her up swiftly and carried her to the bed, laying her down under the covers. "I promise you Haruhi that when you need me the absolute most, I'll be there. I promise."

"I love you, Kyoya."

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against hers. "I love you, too, Haruhi."

Kyoya opened his eyes back in his bedroom, glaring at his father. "Happy? My one chance at true happiness and it's probably just been destroyed."

–

After that night, Haruhi never saw him in her dreams again. Just as he'd said. Her father was murdered when she was 23 but no matter how much she wanted to, Kyoya didn't appear. She thought that maybe he'd lied and he wasn't really watching over her as she cried over Ranka's body in the morgue. "I need you right now," she whispered. "Please."

Nothing.

Then, when she was 24 it happened. August 15, 2013 she was walking toward a small bistro for lunch between court sessions. She thought she saw him for just a moment within the crowds but when she blinked he was gone.

She shook her head and muttered to herself about delusions. "FUJIOKA!" The roar of a voice sounded behind her right when she heard gunshots. She expected to feel pain but didn't, only flinched as the bullets hit the glass window of the shop on either side behind her. when she turned around she was facing the angry face of a very disgruntled male. "MY WIFE LEFT ME BECAUSE OF YOU!"

More shots. She was frozen. But none of them hit her. Someone stepped in front of her, effectively blocking the projectiles from hitting her person. The gun-holder, as if realizing for the first time that he was killing someone that he hadn't intended to, froze and went pale before fleeing. Haruhi stared at the scene in front of her, feeling like it was moving in slow motion as she glanced down at the person that was now lying on the ground with bullet holes in them.

The man turned enough for her to see his face as a few people hesitantly came out of the shop. She gasped. "Kyoya!" She felt her knees buckle behind her as she knelt at his side, tugging off her coat with shaking hands to press it to his wounds. "Someone call 911!" she yelled.

"Don't," Kyoya managed to choke out.

"You're going to die!"

"It's n-not... Like thi-this is th-t-the... first time." His own hands were shaking. She quickly switched her hands around so one was keeping pressure on his bullet wound and the other was gripping his hand tightly.

"You'll be fine," she murmured, feeling panic rise in her chest that she quickly squashed. It was amazing how much blood he was losing. She heard sirens closing in from somewhere.

"It's... meant to... to be... like this. I die ev-eve-ry twe-wenty-fi-five years o-on this date-te."

"Not this time," she replied determinedly. "This time you'll live."

He shook his head, laughter bubbling from his lips brokenly. "Stubborn."

"Shh." Haruhi released his hand to stroke his cheek gently, a small smile forming on her lips, "You were there all along weren't you?" He nodded, shaking as he reached up and placed his hand on top of hers. The ambulance arrived with paramedics inside.

"G-Go back t-t-to court, Ha-aru... hi." His intense gaze told her not to protest. She nodded, backing away enough to let the paramedics through.

"I love you, Kyoya," she murmured, pressing her lips to his forehead as his eyes shut and one of his last breaths left him.

–

He heard the beeping before he heard voices. A woman's and a man's. One holding a hint of worry the other a strong voice of authority. He heard a groan fall from his lips without him even telling his mouth to do it. All talk instantly ceased.

"Kyoya?" It was the woman. And it sounded like he should know her but he couldn't exactly place who she was. He struggled a bit and opened his eyes.

"What day is it?" he croaked.

"Why don't you tell us that?" the male asked. He turned his eyes toward the speaker. Blonde hair, green eyes. Glasses. Sharp nose and chin. Distinct European features. He didn't know this man.

"August... 15th. 2013."

"Not bad... Only two days off. It's the 17th."

He nearly shot up so his back was ramrod straight with shock. If it was August 17th that meant that he hadn't died when he was supposed to. If he hadn't died, that meant... "I'm free," he breathed, almost not believing it for a moment. It'd been 100 years since his death in 1913 and he was finally free. He turned his eyes to the woman, for the first time acknowledging who she was. "Haruhi." All she did was nod.

He laughed. He just outright laughed, which seemed to alarm the doctor quite a bit. And then it alarmed him because it hurt like hell right in his rib cage. He grunted with pain and growled, "What the hell happened to me?"

"You were shot," Haruhi murmured, fingers running through his hair slowly. She was smiling though. "I told you you'd be fine."

"Define 'fine,'" Kyoya grumbled. She chuckled lightly and leaned down to kiss him. He savored it and thanked everything he'd ever known for this.

"You passed. You're free." They were words that rang in his head clearly from the Guardian Elder.

Freedom had never been so sweet.

–

A/N: Holy... shit. I think this is the longest one-shot I've EVER written. I mean seriously... It's twice as long as one of my regular chapters for my multi-chap fics.

Also... This is the general idea that I'm thinking about turning my next book into. Woo. It started off as this innocent little fanfiction idea and turned into an idea for a full blown book with a few different tweaks (and of course longer).

This is also some crazy idea I had to try and write a 10,000+ word one-shot. And did it work? Yes. Yes it did. Yay. Over 10000 words and 21 pages. I'm so awesome.

-cough- This is a Christmas present I suppose... To all you people who have been dying to read LD or Rule 51. Err... I was distracted by this idea for a little over a week. So... That's what my time's been spent doing. Along with schoolwork of course.

Like it or hate it... I don't care! Review!