The Real Origin of Harry Potter
Once there was a boy names Henry. Henry wasn't very bright and would always walk into things. Once he walked into a light post so hard he developed a strange mark on his head. When he looked at it in the mirror it looked like and "L" in the middle of his forehead (keep in mind he's still slow). Plus when he walked into the thing, his glasses broke in half. So A) He's dumb and... well he's dumb and B) He can't see very well now.
And being the bright kid he was, he didn't have the mind to fix them to gether right away. So, as the story goes, he stumbled into his home and walked into the kitchen to see his mom and tell her what happened. He walked over to the stove and squaked, "Hi, Mom!" Too bad for him, it was his dad and he receved a queer look. After all, Henry was adopted by a single parent.
In the joy of seeing his 'mother', he flung his arms up as to hug him, but knocked the handle of a pot of boiling water on the way. The water spilled into his father, who was smoking, and he cursed. Henry got mad and slapped him, sending the cigaret flying out of his mouth, through the air and landing in a pile of shreded busness papers, and of course, they caught on fire.
The house turned into a blazing infurno and everything burnt to the ground, except Henry, who had waddled out seconds before he would have been fried. Why he left his house when he's dumb and blind: he mistakened the crackle of old furniture snapping in the fire for someone calling him outside. At last, his pittifulness payed off.
Anyhow, so he left his house, but as fate would have it, a strange kidnapper was waiting for him outside. He was snatched away from his someone calling him. Then shoved into a viacle, then driven off by the odd figure, then drugged, then fell asleep, then woke up some time later. He looked around at his new surroundings and found himself in a new beautiful house, with his glasses taped together. Turned out that the kidnapper stole and sold children.
A wonderful old man had baught him. But he died hours after Henry woke up, and days after, his wife remarried to a fat balding guy with a chubby son. When he heard what Henry had done, he was upset, but he became even more so when he asked Henry his side of the story and heard how bizzar it was. So he hated him, turned his son against him, and his wife too somewhat. Nobody liked Henry.
When he looked in the mirror at his reflection, he saw an ugly stupid boy, but more so he realized his scare was a little off to the side, not in the very middle of his head. He realized how dumb he was with the walking into things, the not fixing his glasses sooner, the spilling boiling water on his dad, the burning the house down, the killing his dad, the letting himself get kidnapped, ect.
His new family was ashamed so they changed his name to Harry Potter. They also said that the fire was caused by some evil thing and the kidnapper appeared to save him, not, well, kidnap him. Then they banged his head into a wall and made the scare look less like an "L" and more of a lightning bolt, and said that's what he got from the fire. He had a knew life, a new past, and a new family that hated his guts, but whatever. After all, they were sending him to a skitzo boarding school soon anyhow, where everyone poked at the air with sticks and beleived in unicorns and faries. And as they say, life's not fair and then you die. So he might as well make the best of it.
Moral: Don't do drugs!
Once there was a boy names Henry. Henry wasn't very bright and would always walk into things. Once he walked into a light post so hard he developed a strange mark on his head. When he looked at it in the mirror it looked like and "L" in the middle of his forehead (keep in mind he's still slow). Plus when he walked into the thing, his glasses broke in half. So A) He's dumb and... well he's dumb and B) He can't see very well now.
And being the bright kid he was, he didn't have the mind to fix them to gether right away. So, as the story goes, he stumbled into his home and walked into the kitchen to see his mom and tell her what happened. He walked over to the stove and squaked, "Hi, Mom!" Too bad for him, it was his dad and he receved a queer look. After all, Henry was adopted by a single parent.
In the joy of seeing his 'mother', he flung his arms up as to hug him, but knocked the handle of a pot of boiling water on the way. The water spilled into his father, who was smoking, and he cursed. Henry got mad and slapped him, sending the cigaret flying out of his mouth, through the air and landing in a pile of shreded busness papers, and of course, they caught on fire.
The house turned into a blazing infurno and everything burnt to the ground, except Henry, who had waddled out seconds before he would have been fried. Why he left his house when he's dumb and blind: he mistakened the crackle of old furniture snapping in the fire for someone calling him outside. At last, his pittifulness payed off.
Anyhow, so he left his house, but as fate would have it, a strange kidnapper was waiting for him outside. He was snatched away from his someone calling him. Then shoved into a viacle, then driven off by the odd figure, then drugged, then fell asleep, then woke up some time later. He looked around at his new surroundings and found himself in a new beautiful house, with his glasses taped together. Turned out that the kidnapper stole and sold children.
A wonderful old man had baught him. But he died hours after Henry woke up, and days after, his wife remarried to a fat balding guy with a chubby son. When he heard what Henry had done, he was upset, but he became even more so when he asked Henry his side of the story and heard how bizzar it was. So he hated him, turned his son against him, and his wife too somewhat. Nobody liked Henry.
When he looked in the mirror at his reflection, he saw an ugly stupid boy, but more so he realized his scare was a little off to the side, not in the very middle of his head. He realized how dumb he was with the walking into things, the not fixing his glasses sooner, the spilling boiling water on his dad, the burning the house down, the killing his dad, the letting himself get kidnapped, ect.
His new family was ashamed so they changed his name to Harry Potter. They also said that the fire was caused by some evil thing and the kidnapper appeared to save him, not, well, kidnap him. Then they banged his head into a wall and made the scare look less like an "L" and more of a lightning bolt, and said that's what he got from the fire. He had a knew life, a new past, and a new family that hated his guts, but whatever. After all, they were sending him to a skitzo boarding school soon anyhow, where everyone poked at the air with sticks and beleived in unicorns and faries. And as they say, life's not fair and then you die. So he might as well make the best of it.
Moral: Don't do drugs!