A/N

Note: This is old. VERY old. I don't know what to do with it, so I'm posting it. It's probably not going anywhere unless I get some major inspiration. XD Enjoy the randomness.

Chaos Magic

"Tell me again, Malik," Bakura commanded lazily," What we're doing here, at seven in the morning...On a Saturday."

The rest of the group shifted guiltily, thinking the same thing. Malik had called each one of them up barely an hour ago, and had demanded that they immediately drop everything and rush over to the Museum.

Yami and Yuugi had actually only just gone to bed, finishing their 'homework', when the phone had rung. At first, they had ignored it but when it continued to repeatedly sound throughout their empty apartment, Yuugi had rolled over to the edge and fallen to the ground. He continued to roll across the floor and reached the phone, knocking it off its hook and croaked out a "Hello?".

Upon hearing what Malik was shouting into the phone, something about if they didn't get down there he would put them in their own personal hell, Yuugi immediately woke up, hung up the phone and shuffled back to the bed. With a stiffled giggle, he grabbed the end of the comforter and yanked it off the bed, exposing the naked Yami underneath.

Said Yami shivered and cracked one bleary eye open. "Aibou, if you don't get back into bed of your own free will this instant, I'll make sure you never leave it ever again."

Yuugi muffled another giggle. Today just seemed to be a day for threats. "But Yami," Yuugi sounded amused, "Malik wants us to go down to the museum. I think he has something to show us."

Yami groaned and mumbled something that sounded remarkably like "Screw Malik" but then his face was muffled by the pillow and whatever else he was saying was lost.

The disgruntled, the bewildered, the just-dragged-out-of-bed, and even the sexually frustrated had all arrived with undue speed and now stood expectantly before Malik, who was lost in thought and unaware of the commotions he was causing.

Bakura tried again. "Malik, if you don't tell me why I am standing here, instead of fucking the brains out of my Aibou, I will personally see to it that you never enjoy anything or anyone in bed for as long as I live."

All around the group, blushes spread across their faces and Ryou buried his burning cheeks in his hands. He loved his yami; truly, he did. But sometimes, he wondered how he survived the near heart-attacks he experienced every day from the numerous brash comments that Bakura liked to make.

Ryou had even tried explaining the concept of tact to Bakura on a number of occasions, which almost always resulted in Bakura stating that the truth was 'much more fun'. After that, he'd 'tactfully' corner Ryou in the bedroom and...Ryou blushed and didn't finish that thought. It was bad enough that he had Bakura; Ryou was stubbornly trying to hold onto his perverted-less sanity.

And it didn't seem to be working very well, at that.

"Yes, Malik," Yami chipped in, still a bit grumpy after only maybe half an hour's worth of sleep. "This better be good, or you won't like me."

At this, Malik turned at indignant glare upon the former pharaoh. "And when have I ever liked you?"

Yami paused, in mock-thought, as Yuugi giggled. "He's got a point there, Love."

Yami only replied with a scowl as he uncrossed his arms and pulled Yuugi into his embrace, leaning back on the marble pillar behind him. If nothing else, he'd at least enjoy some cuddle time with his hikari until Malik gathered his wits and decided to tell them why they'd been summoned like a group of Duel Monsters.

A growl suddenly echoed in the empty hall, sounding remarkably like a dog, that made everyone jump, save the one who had caused it.

Jou stood with his hands on his hips and a dark expression on his face, Seto leaning against the wall behind him, amused. "Malik...I thought you were done with being slow and all that when we split you and your dark side in two." He blinked. "Are you becoming stupid or something? What's taking so long?"

When Malik continued to ignore him, worrying his bottom lip and wringing his hands, Jou growled again. "Malik! I want to know what I'm doing here when I could be sleeping! Or better yet, eating!"

Behind him, Seto sighed. "Way to make being with me seem important, mutt." To which Jou replied with a grin.

"Seto, you know you top that list by a mile! Don't be fishing for compliments."

Bakura began to gag in the corner while Ryou tried ineffectively to shush him. Seto only rolled his eyes at the former spirit's antics and pulled Jou back until he was leaning on Seto, who had made himself comfortable against the wall.

Isis walked in at that moment and surveyed the group, lifting an eyebrow. "Malik, I think you've waited long enough. Just get this over with so they can leave; they're ruining the exibit."

Bakura frowned at the woman. "I take offense to that; there's no one else here, Isis. You closed the museum to see us, remember?" Ignoring the pleading Ryou hanging on his arm, Bakura grinned. "That Yami Malik rubbing off on you, eh?"

At this her composure cracked and Isis bristled while Malik began protesting loudly that his boyfriend did not rub off on anyone expect him, and what did that have to do with anything, anyway?

Bakura just doubled over laughing while Ryou buried his face in his boyfriend's shirt to hide his smile; sometimes, it was just too easy to get a reaction out of the Ishtars, and Bakura had managed to hit two of them with one remark.

'That has to be a new record or something, right Aibou?' Bakura spoke through their mind-link and chuckled.

Ryou grinned at the warmth his yami allowed through their bond; it was one of the things he loved about Bakura, even if he rarely showed that warmth to anyone else.

'I imagine so, yami. You really got them good this time.' Ryou grinned back.

'Well, I know it's a job well done when you think so. See? I told you I was a good influence.' Bakura remarked with a self-satisfied smirk, tuning out the outside world for a moment.

Ryou just shook his head. 'Who said anything about it being good?'

Yuugi watched as Bakura gave Ryou a playful punch in the shoulder, before turning his attention to his own yami.

'Yami...This is incredibly boring. When can we stop talking about Yami Malik and start talking about why we're here?'

Yami's smirk never faultered on the outside, but his laughter rang out between their soulrooms. 'You're bored, too? I was beginning to think I was the only one who didn't find this all incredibly interesting.'

Yuugi's giggles filtered down through their link and Yami smiled at the joyful sound. 'But he does raise a good point, Yami. By the way, where is Marik?'

At that moment, a loud crash sounded on the other side of the exibition room and jerked the group out of whatever thoughts they'd been in. Malik sighed in relief and wiped a hand across his forehead. "Finally."

Bakura caught the word and turned sharply to the other Egyptain, who was busy scanning for Marik in the sudden dust cloud that had enveloped the other end. "Finally? What do you mean 'finally'? We've been waiting for you to start almost an hour ago! Dammit Malik, what's wrong with you today?"

This time he did quiet down when Ryou put a finger over his lips, settling for a deathly glower than caused Yuugi to hide his face in Yami's black shirt. Bakura let out a smug grin, sticking his tongue out in the former pharaoh's general direction, and turned his attention to Marik, who was striding purposefully out of the commotion towards Malik while Isis twittered in the background about 'museum damages' and 'repair costs'.

"Here." Marik tossed something he'd been holding towards his hikari and turned to eye the rest of them with a dubious expression. Behind him, Malik frantically rushed forward and with a lunge, caught the object just before it hit the floor. He sent an angry expression at Marik's back before picking himself up, but he remained quiet as he cradled the brown-wrapped object in his discarded jacket.

"Well, I hope this isn't all a waste of time, Malik," Marik threw over his shoulder, but before anyone could formulate a retort, he continued. "Apparently, none of you know why you're here, as my hikari here hasn't dined to explain anything, so once again, I'm left with such a dismal task."

He closed his eyes for a moment in frustration, and waited for any comment. None came; the three couples remained silent, although a tense air had developed and they shifted impatiently, waiting for him to continue.

"The...thing that Malik's holding is what I brought back from my recent trip."

Bakura opened his mouth, no doubt to insert another snide comment, but Marik merely raised an eyebrow and continued. "For those of you who weren't informed, or possess faulty memories," At this, he looked pointedly at Bakura and Jou, "I had gone back to Egypt to collect mine and Malik's possessions."

He paused for a moment and stared off into the distance. "When I arrived, I was met by Rashid, as usual, and we proceeded to the desert, the usual people in tow."

"People?" Jou interrupted, confused by the reference.

Yami glanced over from his admiration of Yuugi's hair and answered. "He means the numerous officials who 'want to see his permits' but really are just tailing him to make sure he doesn't do anything illegal...Again."

"Don't forget his fanclub, Pharaoh," Bakura shot, finally managed to tear Ryou's hand off his mouth.

"What fanclub?" Yuugi spoke up, eyes shifting from the imposing and dangerous-looking Marik to his slightly less terrible hikari. 'Since when does he have a fanclub?' He sent to Yami through their link, but it was Bakura who answered.

"Oh, his fanclub of Law Inforcement Officers," Bakura fluttered his eyelashes in a pathetic attempt to mimick girlish mannerisms. 'They do love him so."

"Shut. Up," Malik ground our between his tighlty clenched teeth, all the while darting glances at his yami, suddenly fearful of his reaction.

But Marik only smiled slightly, his lips twisting into a smug grin. "Of course, they all managed to get lost by the time I finally arrived 'home, sweet home'."

Yami groaned while Seto smacked himself in the forehead. "Idiot. Do you know how long it took me to settle the lawsuits last time because of that 'drug hallucination' claim? Or the size of the fines at the end of it all? You owe me, by the way."

"It can't be helped if they provoke me," Marik said simply before narrowing his eyes, "And Kaiba, I do not owe you anything. We settled this already, remember?"

To everyone's surprise, Seto immediately flushed and dropped the subject. Resuming his position against the wall, he dragged Jou back with him, and glared at all the curious looks sent in his direction, daring them to say something.

"Continue," Yami commanded, reluctantly pulling his eyes away from a sight he'd not likely see again.

And for once, Marik complied even if his priorities were something other than pleasing the Pharaoh. Something more along the lines of having to do with Malik...

Marik coughed suddenly as a particularly tasty image came to mind, but resumed his recount a moment later. "When we had finished- "

'He means when they had totally stripped down the place of anything of value,' Yami sent to Yuugi, who couldn't help the little giggle that escaped him. Marik paused, as he took in a breath, and glared at them.

"I was approached by a man, several in fact, and after they calmly told me what they wanted- "

This time not even Malik could hold back a groan and he turned accusing eyes on his yami. "I know you don't mean that, Marik. What did you do to them?"

Marik snorted, "Nothing. I couldn't."

Yami raised an eyebrow, "You mean to tell me, you, the self-proclaimed Invincible and Ruthless One...Were defeated?"

The self-proclaimed Invincible and Ruthless One scowled. "Of course not. I was blocked."

"Blocked, as in...From your Sennen Item?" Bakura broke in, for once, serious.

"Yes," Marik frowned. "They requested I come back with them to see someone. I must confess: I was intrigued. It's not everyday that someone manages to outsmart the power of the Sennen Items."

"You've got that right," Yami sniffed, a bit insulted by the fact that there was something more powerful around, and in working condition, than his Items.

There was a lull in the conversation as the Item users tried to wrap their thoughts around that idea, broken only by Jou's occasion growls and soft exclamations as he spoke quietly with Seto.

"So," Yuugi shifted uncomfortably. "Did you actually meet the person?"

Yuugi's head was already spinning from what had been said so far; he didn't know how he'd handle any more 'nice' surprises. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Yami was laughing at his attempt at a distraction but Yuugi stubbornly ignored him.

"Yes, I did," Marik's expression darkened, and he cast a glance behind him at Malik before continuing. "He gave me that."

Malik stepped forward and held up the wrapped package. Everyone stared intently, not really sure what they were looking at, and hesitant to say anything, for fear of looking stupid. Bakura opened his mouth anyway.

"Uh, Marik? Did you even unwrap it?" He snorted. "Knowing you: you and your brilliant hikari have probably just been staring at it and scratching your heads in confusion. I bet you don't even know what it is!"

This time, Ryou only sighed and quietly stepped behind his yami and out of Marik's direct line of fire. Sometimes, like now, it just didn't help to have a yami like Bakura.

The darker Tomb Keeper narrowed his eyes and growled in retaliation while Malik's hands tightened around the object he was holding. "For your information, I was the one who wrapped it in the first place. And if you want to know what it is so much, then fine."

Malik let out a surprised cry as Marik wrenched the package out of his grip. With one fluid motion, he tore back the paper and held it up as a bright light suddenly exploded outward and enveloped them all.

Yami shielded Yuugi's eyes from view as he tentatively moved them closer to Marik, squinting past the light to see what he was holding up. Unconsciously, he invoked his Sennen powers, and the Eye of Horus appeared on his forehead as he struggled to use the darkness to shield himself and his hikari.

It was with a gasp that he realized he was having absolutely no affect, and the darkness he'd tried to create was shrinking away from the light rather than expanding around it. Yuugi stirred in his grip and tried to peek up from the burrow he'd made in Yami's shirt but his head was pushed firmly back under Yami's arm in a no-nonsense fashion.

Yuugi shivered; was this that thing that could block the Sennen Items? What was it doing with Marik anyway? If someone wanted to get revenge on them, this was their best bet if it meant Yami and the others couldn't use their powers.

'Yami?' He called out tentatively, as he felt Yami's arms shudder under the strain he was putting on himself, and the power that he had.

'I'm fine, Aibou. I just need to see how far I can push myself.' His reply was terse and somewhat strained, and Yuugi rubbed his dark's arms in understanding. 'Whatever this is, it must have a weakness, somewhere.'

Yuugi finally risked a peek from under Yami's arm and looked behind him to see Ryou in the same predicament. His face was buried in Bakura's back, his arms around his yami's waist offering as much comfort and support as he could. Bakura was also facing the light eminating from the strange object, eyes closed and an expression of intense concentration on his face; he was stubbornly trying to defeat the invisible barrier around his magics, as well.

Yuugi's eyes traveled further across the room and caught those of Jou, peeking out of Seto's own arm as they braced themselves against the wall. With his ancient Egyptian past, Seto, too, felt that he needed to find a way to get around this strange magic. His eyes seemed to disregard the intense brightness of the light directed at the group and were focused on some middle point in it all.

Perhaps he could actually see the object, Yuugi pondered, but before his thought process could get any further, a 'pop' was heard, as if some hole had been suddenly plugged; several voices chorused in protest.

Yuugi blinked, and the hall reappeared before him in all its normalcy. He sighed; what was it about him and always getting caught in the middle of strange things?

'Oh Aibou, that's what you have me for!' Yami told him. They both new that nothing could ever go horribly wrong when they were together.

'And other things...' Yuugi hinted in an uncharacteristic show of innuendoism.

'Yuugi,' Yami sounded shocked, but Yuugi knew that his darker half loved it when he spoke like that. Of course, not that Yami'd ever admit to it. At least, not without certain coercion, Yuugi smirked slightly.

"Marik, what the hell was that for?" Bakura complained loudly. "I wasn't finished."

"Neither was I," Yami added as Seto dropped his suitcase symbolically.

"It's dangerous," Marik bit out, his tone regretful. "That's why you've all been brought here. I was hoping that you, Pharaoh, would have some insight on this."