3/31/2013 - So, I finally decided to edit this little two-shot we have here. I remember when the season premier aired I was super disappointed that what I'd wrote was nothing like what actually happened. Even if the writing itself could be better, I still like this version better. I hate that they did the whole Beckett-doesn't-remember-Castle-telling-her-he-loves-her. That annoyed me.

I feel like if somebody had a near death experience they'd jump at something like that, not push the person away. But I digress, as there's nothing I can do to change how "Rise" went.

At least she survived the whole ordeal, eh?

But I guess season five totally makes up for all that crap though, so I can't really complain.

Anyways, hope you enjoy! :)

24 HOURS
Part I

Richard Castle was hardly a patient man. And waiting was most definitely not his forte.

He looks around the bland, impersonal waiting room. Doctors, nurses, and orderlies rush around the place, but none approach him. The receptionist at the front desk has come to hate his presence and incessant questions, but he wants to know—no, scratch that—he needs to know how she's doing. If there's any news.

"Everything's going to be all right, Dad." Alexis says reassuringly, placing her hand on his.

He just nods, not wanting to say anything. Not wanting to jinx the situation, as childish as it sounds. Then again, when was he ever adult-like? Well... there was that time— no, Richard Castle was a childish man. But it was a good kind of childish. At least, he'd like to think so. "Dad, why don't you write in your diary—or journal, or whatever you want me to call it. Maybe it'll help."

He looks to her and smiles. What he'd do without her, he doesn't even want to think about that. "That's probably a good idea, Alexis. Look," he says. "I'm glad you're here, but if there's somewhere else you have to be you can go. I'll call you with any news."

"Are you sure, Dad? I don't want to leave you."

"I'll be fine," he promises her.

"All right," she says, standing up swinging her bag over her shoulder. "I'll see you at home."

Castle watches as Alexis disappears from view, before pulling out his leather-bound journal. He pulls a pen from his pocket, and opens up to a blank page.

May 17, 2011.

11:03am.

It's been hell, Kate. Utter hell.

Not knowing what's actually going on, how you're doing in that operating room. I've been trying to reassure myself that everything will turn out fine, that you will come out of this thing alive, but I'm fearing the worst. A life without you, as cheesy as it sounds, would be unbearable. Unimaginable. But the thing that pains me the most... is this is all my fault.

I saw the glare of the snipers rifle. I noticed it before the shot rang out. I could've saved you... but I was a second too late. A split second too late. If I had only been faster, you wouldn't be in that room and I wouldn't be worried out of my mind. But now, there's nothing I can do. It's all in the hands of the doctors. You arrived at the hospital nearly six hours ago.

Now I'm sitting in the waiting room.

Waiting.

And waiting.

Waiting for any sort of information on your... condition.

But you know doctors. They don't like saying anything. Hell, I don't even know if you've gotten out of surgery yet.

But we were all here, Kate. Ryan, Esposito, Lanie, your father. Alexis even stopped by. Well, we were all here. The room is pretty empty now—everyone's busy trying to catch your shooter. Your dad's still here, of course. He's been... quiet I guess. I think he blames me, though. We haven't talked much, other than the occasional 'any news while I was gone?' sort of conversation.

Now, all I can do is wait. But you know me, I hate waiting. I keep on thinking that your life is in the hands of some doctors we don't even know. I know I shouldn't be thinking that way, I mean I have no conclusive evidence that should lead me to believe they'll screw up. But, the thought is like a bright light in the back of my mind. Perhaps it's the writer in me.

But, one thing I do know... it'll do me no good to play the 'what-if' game.

12:07am.

Another hour has passed.

Did I mention I hate waiting?

Your dad has been shooting me weird glances. What? Has he never seen a grown man write in his journal before? I've been trying to explain to him that it's not a diary, but he says he doesn't want to know. Rest assured, Kate... this is not a diary, as I said it's a journal. What can I say... I'm a writer! It's in my blood. Writing in this thing is actually kind of therapeutic, if you know what I mean?

Writing helps me in situations of great... tragedy. It's the one place I can get out all of my jumbled, mixed-up thoughts in one place.

"Excuse me?"

Castle looked up from his journal.

Jim stood up. "Is everything all right with Katie?"

A young, blond doctor looks at the two men, then focuses on Jim. "Mr. Beckett, correct? I'm Doctor McKenzie," she extends out her hand.

He nods quickly, eyes eager for information, and reaches to shake the woman's hand.

"Ms. Beckett is still in surgery at the moment. The good thing is that the bullet didn't rupture any major organs. If everything goes well, she'll be good as new," the doctor smiled reassuringly.

"And if it doesn't?" Jim asked.

"Well," she sighed. "We can cross that bridge when and only if it comes. But I'm feeling pretty optimistic right now."

Oh. My. God.

Or in the the immortal words of... you: Shut. The. Front. Door.

I don't think I've ever felt so happy. So light.

Doctor McKenzie just came to talk with us. She says things are looking good. That she's feeling optimistic. Her words were so—reassuring. She called you Ms. Beckett, funnily enough. I almost corrected here on that one, Detective.

My mind is still playing the 'what-if' game. It took a lot not to ask her what would happen if they couldn't remove the bullet.

It's been seven hours since I saw you last. Alive and breathing that is.

It is weird to say that I already miss you so much? I miss your smile, and your facial expressions, and just your overall presence; it just isn't the same without you here, Kate.

Your dad just went out for another coffee run. The boys have been checking in every half hour or so. I keep promising to call them as soon as I have any news, but other than that light at the end of the tunnel also known as Doctor McKenzie's conversation with us, we haven't gotten anything else. I know your dad is still worried sick.

It must pain him to see his only daughter so close to, you know. No father wants to bury their child before them self. And with his wife—your mother—gone, you're the only one he has left. I can only imagine what exactly he's feeling right now. I don't know what I'd do if that was Alexis in there.

I hope you're all right, Kate.

I hope, that at this very second you're not feeling any pain. Most importantly, that you know that there so many people who care so deeply about you. Who love you so much.

I've put this off for too, let me tell you. I've debated the right time to say something, but I could never get the right words out. Ironic, huh? Coming from a writer. But I want you to know that when I uttered those three words to you, I meant them with all of my heart. Now, with so little time left, I'm annoyed with myself more than anything for not saying anything sooner. I regret waiting until you were... dying... to tell you the truth. About how I really feel about you. About us.

With all that happened, I'm not entirely sure you even heard what I said. Or maybe you think that it was just a dream or something. But if you're reading this right now, what you heard was correct, Kate. And I'll say them again, and again and never stop.

I love you.

God, this is going to be cheesy, but I don't even care anymore.

I love you, Katherine Beckett. Always have, always will. Maybe that will make you understand that I wasn't just trying to be a pain in the ass whenever you had boyfriends. Demming, Josh. I was jealous. Extremely jealous. I can't deny that anymore.

I promise that if you actually make it through, we're actually going to talk about this. About us. I don't want this to be like every other intimate thing that's ever happened between us... gone almost completely ignored. I don't want that to happen anymore. Please understand that I'm not trying to be pushy, I just care too much about you, Kate.

It's been exactly twenty-four hours since you first got here. Twenty-four long hours of hell.

I think I've begun to loose what's left of my mind.

I haven't went home. I can't.

I just want to know that my Kate is going to be all right.

"Mr. Beckett?" Doctor McKenzie appears once more. She taps the elder man on the shoulder. He continues snoring away. She looks to Castle expectantly.

"Jim?" Castle says.

He jolts up. "What!?"

She looks at the two men. The smile on her face is a good sign, they both think to themselves. "We've managed to remove the bullet. Ms. Beckett is going to be... just fine!"