Title: One Soul's Cry, One Soul's Answer
Author: Third Charm
Fandom: Babylon 5
Pairings: Marcus/Neroon.
Story Type: Hurt/Comfort, Supernatural
Rating: T
Disclaimer: Babylon 5 and all subsequent major characters, plots, and ideas are the property of J. Michael Straczynski, Babylonian Inc. and Warner Bros. The following story was written only for the purposes of entertainment. No income had been made.
Warnings: AU, not beta read, slash.
Spoilers: Everything
Summary: This is my entry into the 2006 Halloween Challenge for the Delusions group. Sometimes, the pain of a pure soul will cause even the Universe to break its own laws.
Author's Note: One Earth year equals 0.74 Minbari cycles. The Minbari words and phrases were found at the "JumpNow" website in John Hightower's Minbari dictionary, though not all are direct translations.
One Soul's Cry, One Soul's Answer
Marcus barely made it to his quarters before he collapsed. The Anla'shok had just made into his tiny quarters before his knees gave out and he crumpled to a boneless heap upon the cold metal deck. After a few moments spent catching his breath, the Ranger then literally crawled to his little lounge. It was only through shear determination and stubbornness that was he able to haul himself onto it. He then let himself fall completely apart.
Every horror the young man had faced was evident on his face and in his beaten down, thin frame wrapped in the now too big Ranger's uniform. You could read the story of the Ranger's life in the pallor of his papery skin that showed every vein, in the dark smudges beneath his eyes, in the beaten demeanor of the shivering, too thin body curled into a ball on that tiny lounge. But the pain Marcus Cole was going through was most evident when you looked into his eyes. Those haunted, emerald eyes were wells of pain so deep and so powerful that even the agony of a banshee's cry couldn't compare.
The physical and emotional drain of the Shadow War had been almost unendurable for the Ranger. Now, this drain from the fast approaching EA Civil War was even worse. This time, they would be fighting their own. This time, they would be forced to fight and kill their brothers and sisters. Marcus shuddered in grief at that thought.
William, his brother in body, had died in his arms after he'd practically sold his soul to EFI protect both his immediate family and all of Humanity. His entire colony and all his employees had been murdered as well on that nightmarish day. That had been when Marcus committed what he had seen as his first betrayal of Humanity; he'd failed to protect his own.
Then he'd joined the Rangers at his dying brother's request. In his eyes, that had been his second betrayal. Since that fateful day, he'd been working with, living with and living as a Minbari; the race he'd warred against, the race that had almost annihilated his own, the race that he'd sworn to despise forever. He felt that his third, and until now worst, betrayal of Humanity had been committed the day he'd forgiven the Minbari for what they had done to the Human race.
Now, he was about to commit what he saw as the ultimate betrayal of Humanity. Now, he would be forced to take the lives of his fellow Humans. The Ranger had never thought that the pain he'd felt at William's death could ever have been equaled, but the knowledge that he would be forced to murder his own caused a pain that was almost as acute. It also brought back the pain of all his loses and the young man almost collapsed beneath the onslaught. Marcus stifled a sob before he surrendered to the agony and cried out a heartfelt plea to the otherwise empty room.
"Why? Why God? Why is this happening? Hasn't Humanity been punished enough for its hubris? Do we need to stain our hands with one another's blood as well? Why? Oh God, why? Why won't the pain just stop?" the Ranger cried out before completely succumbing to his sorrow. The grief stricken Ranger literally cried himself to sleep, and even in his troubled sleep, he would still softly cry out in despair.
Slowly, ever so slowly, awareness came back to him. It felt as if he were swimming up through the warmest, softest silks as he came to awareness. He began to remember, and even as he remembered, he felt as if he were still cocooned in that warmth and safety. He remembered the end of the Struggle, the end of it all. He remembered the final Light and somehow knew where he now was. Then he felt the pure, unadulterated joy of the Universe Manifest, heard the music of the stars and knew the tranquility, contentment and peace of the Light of which he was now part of. After so many lifetimes, lifetimes that were all now remembered, of struggle and war, the Warrior's soul finally felt at peace and reveled in that feeling for what seemed to be an eternity.
It would be a long time in his reckoning before he felt the Wrongness invade his existence. At first, he was barely aware of it. Then, as that feeling of that Wrongness, that feeling of pain grew; he began to understand it for what it was. The feeling was the pain of his Id'Teeri (soul's harmony or soul's mate). It was the feeling of the utter sorrow that his One bore alone, and the Warrior's soul cried out in despair at the knowledge. The soul cried out because his Id'Teeri was still walking between the Shadow and the Light and was too far away to console. The Warrior's soul despaired of ever being able to bring comfort to his mate, of being able to ease the burden of his One. Yet, even in the height of the Warrior soul's despair there was Light, there was Comfort; for the Universe had heard its children's anguished cries and sought to comfort them.
Softly, It spoke to the Warrior's soul, "Go to him, child. Go to your other half. Offer what comforts you may at this moment and help him grow strong for the Struggle ahead. Give him the strength to make the sacrifice that he will be called to make, for the survival of the future's One Who Will Be will be in his hands. Go child, go to your forever mate and guide him safely through the Darkest Watches of this Night."
The Warrior's soul began to feel the shift as he was set upon the path back towards his former life, the path that led to his One. Slowly the feeling of warmth and safety faded as the corporeal universe came closer and closer. As the distance towards his Id'Teeri lessoned, the soul felt the latest life and it's memories come to the fore, felt Neroon of the Star Riders come to the fore. This made sense to the soul, since this incarnation of his forever mate knew only the incarnation of Neroon. Marcus would not remember any of the other paths they'd walked together.
It was then that Neroon felt the sorrow at knowing that his One had only known him as an enemy in this past lifetime. As the spirit of the Warrior finally reached his mate, the sorrow turned to shame for letting himself succumb to the blind hatred that had ultimately caused his own death and left the one who should have been his mala (spouse) alone. He had left Marcus to carry these burdens and this pain alone when he now knew that it could have been so different. He now knew that at each turning point in his life he could have made a decision that would not have left Marcus alone in his sorrow and pain.
Finally, as the incorporeal being that had once been Neroon reached Marcus, he was able to let go of his own sorrow, for he knew that it would only add to the sorrow of the one he had come to comfort. He looked upon the sleeping figure of the Ranger and could see the despair and sorrow in the lines of Marcus's body. The Warrior could feel the pain of his soul mate's dreams and knew what he had to do. Neroon recalled the feelings of tranquility, contentment and peace of the Light that he had so recently been a part of and brought them to the fore. He wrapped his energies around the fitfully sleeping Ranger and cocooned him in that remembered comfort. He then added all the love he felt for the Human to the comforting web. Finally, the Warrior entered the dreams of his One.
Through those dreams Neroon was finally able to dispel the last of Marcus's despair and pain. In those dreams Neroon spoke of his love for Marcus and of waiting him in that place where no shadows fall. In those dreams Neroon offered his soul mate both spiritual and physical comfort and told him what the Universe had spoken of. In those dreams Neroon was finally able to experience what could have been, and would also someday be. And in those dreams a tired and downtrodden Marcus Cole finally found the strength and courage to go on and meet his destiny in that life, for he knew that his forever mate was waiting for him on the other side.