~ Doubt ~
Aerith quietly sat down on the church floor. She looked over at the flower bed next to her. They were growing in the middle of the church, in a patch of soil where a section of the floor had been ripped away. Aerith had personally grown these flowers herself, something she was quite proud of. Still, she couldn't help but feel a bit discouraged as she looked over them.
She was alone, as usual. Hardly anyone ever came into the broken down church these days. It was usually just her tending to the flowers all by her lonesome. Aerith didn't mind though. It was a nice, quiet place; a perfect place to relax… and muse about things.
Earlier, before she had come to the church, she had been out for date. Well… if you could call it a date. He had taken her to Seventh Heaven, a bar owned by one of her friends, Tifa. The two of them were suppose to have a quiet evening out together, but as soon as they stepped inside, they were bombarded by his friends. A table for two quickly turned into a table for nine… or was it ten? Aerith didn't really know. He was a real popular guy. People always seemed to be drawn to him.
As usual, everyone was having a good time. Well, everyone except her that is. Guess you could say she wasn't exactly in the party mood. The place was getting so crowded, it was easy enough for her to slip out unnoticed.
Still, Aerith wondered if he had noticed. Probably not though. He was probably too preoccupied with his friends to notice if she was there or not. It couldn't be helped.
Aerith let out a soft sigh as she leaned in to stroke the flowers growing in her little garden. Whenever she had a problem, Aerith would always talk to her flowers. They were the only things she felt completely comfortable around. And of course, they made for great listeners.
"I just don't get it you guys," Aerith said, addressing her delicate little friends. "They say the beginning of a relationship is always the best part. It's supposed to be fun, exciting, memorable…"
Aerith smiled as she thought about all the crazy stories her friends would share with her. "There's supposed to be flowers and chocolates. The boy is supposed to do everything he can to win you over..." She took a deep pause, her smile quickly turning into a sad frown. "So… how come with me, it's different?"
She thought back to all her recent dates with him. They were far from the conventional definition of romantic. "He's always walking in front. I always look like a fool who's chasing after him, trying to grab his attention. Like a little puppy following its owner… Almost like I'm the one courting him!"
Aerith groaned out loud. She hadn't even realized how ridiculous it sounded until she heard it out loud. "I don't understand why he's always in such a rush to get places. He's almost always surrounded by his guy friends. He has all the time in the world for them, but can't even squeeze in a dinner with me. They're always so busy, rushing off to do this and that. He's always leaving me behind…"
"And," Aerith added, pointing out a finger to prove her point. "That's not even the worst part you guys… He's a real ladies man too. All the girls just swoon over him. Even when it's just the two of us going out for a walk they'll be girls trying to make a move on him. What's even more annoying is he doesn't do anything to stop them, he even talks back to them. He says it's just harmless flirting… but I'm not too sure."
Aerith couldn't help but grin. Here she was, yapping about a boy like a little schoolgirl would. She never pictured herself to be the jealous type. But then again, she never thought she would meet someone to be jealous over.
"What does he really see me as? What does he really see us as? Everyone says we're together, but he's never called me his girlfriend or anything... We've never even had a first kiss yet!"
Aerith paused and stared at her flowers, almost half expecting them to respond to her. "It's not like I don't want to… But…" Aerith's face began to redden. It was unbelievable. There was not a soul around and still she was getting flustered just talking about him. "There are so many things I want to ask him…so many things I want to clarify. He hardly ever gives me a straightforward answer, so there's not much I can do…"
Feeling restless, Aerith slowly stared up at the church ceiling. There was a rather large hole in the roof that let in just a bit of sunlight. It was the only reason her little friends could grow in such a place.
It was funny. Whenever she looked up at the sky, the first thing to pop into her mind was him. Aerith couldn't really explain why, he just did. Every time she looked up, she would always be reminded of his goofy little face.
Aerith bit on her bottom lip as she turned to her flowers once again. "He's… a real sweet talker though. Whenever I'm feeling down or unhappy, he always knows what to say to make me laugh. He's always been like that, ever since the very first day we met…" Despite everything that had been bothering her about him, Aerith couldn't help the smile that formed on her face when she thought back to that very first day.
It must have been sometime during the winter. She had been working away, tending to her flowers as usual. It was really by chance that the two of them had even met.
He had stepped into the church, hoping to escape from the cold winter storm that was brewing outside the church doors. He hadn't expected anyone else to be there. She hadn't expected anyone to come in either. Be it rain or snow, people usually retreated to inns or pubs. No one ever walked around this area of the slums.
Still, there he was. That day in the church, he had been wearing a SOLDIER uniform, indicating that he was working for Shinra. Aerith had to admit, she was intimidated at first. After all, she had heard terrible stories about Shinra; their illegal practices, how they were sucking the planet dry, how its members would abuse and mistreat common citizens. Shinra certainly didn't suggest a positive connotation. The word SOLDIER in particular, often emitted fear and terror.
However, he was different. Being only about a year older than her, he was anything but frightening. He was very tall and well-built, a pretty intimidating looking guy when she compared him to all the other shlubs in town. Still, he had a cute boyish charm to his face. His long violet- coloured hair was styled in a rather unusual way. The back of his hair went all the way down to the side of his neck, while in the front was a single lock of hair hanging down his face. It was an odd look, but he seemed to make it work.
However, what really caught her attention were his sky-blue eyes. She knew that all SOLDIERS were genetically enhanced to have mako fused into their eyes. She had seen it quite a number of times when SOLDIER guards patrolling the slums had approached her. Still, his eyes seemed different to her. They were so much more vibrant. She had even complimented him about them one time. He in turn, had teased her about being attracted to more than just the eyes.
The two eventually got down to chatting that day. Though she wasn't use to talking with strangers, Aerith had to admit that she enjoyed the company. It made for a nice change.
Eventually, the storm had calmed down and he had to take his leave, explaining that they were probably expecting him back at headquarters. Aerith had nodded her head understandingly, reassuring him that she would be fine staying in the church alone.
As he walked over to the front of the church, Aerith admittedly felt a bit disheartened. Though they had only just met, Aerith already felt like she was missing his company. Of course, she didn't dare say this out loud, for fear of sounding odd and peculiar.
He didn't need her to say it out loud though. He could already tell. Right before he stepped out of the church, he had turned around to face her with a bright smile on his face. He promised to stop by the next day and asked if it was okay with her. Aerith was a little taken back, but of course she was overjoyed. Without saying a word, she simply nodded her head and smiled back at him.
And just as promised, he had come to visit her the very next day, and the day after that. Several months later, here they were.
"He can be a real cutie sometimes," Aerith mused as she smiled to herself. "I really like spending time with him. Whenever we're together, he makes me feel really happy."
She starred at her flowers, once again hoping that they could somehow give her any kind of advice. "I want to know what I mean to him… But he doesn't open up much, and it's not like I can read his mind." Aerith let out a playful pout. She was getting more and more frustrated; and the fact that her words were falling on deaf ears wasn't exactly helping either. "What do you guys think I should do?"
Suddenly, she heard a voice from behind. "Maybe you should actually talk to him."
Aerith immediately flinched, startled by the stranger's sudden intrusion. She had gotten so carried away that she didn't even notice someone stepping into the church. As she quickly got up and turned around to face the unexpected visitor, her face reddened. Leaning up against the side of the church entrance was a very familiar face.
As he stepped away from the door and slowly made his way over to her, Aerith could see that he had a big, cheery smile on his face.
"You should tell this guy," he said, folding his arms together as he walked up to her. "Better than sitting here all by your lonesome and telling it to a bunch of plants anyways."
Aerith began to blush madly. She quickly ducked her head down, hoping to avoid direct eye contact with him. "H-How long have you been there…?"
The man chuckled a bit. "Hm… Let's see," he said, tapping his chin with his index finger. "Long enough to know that I'm a 'real cutie'."
Aerith let out a soft sigh. She turned around to face her garden of flowers, still avoiding his gaze. "You know, it's not good to eavesdrop," she said in an upset yet playful voice. "It was a private conversation…"
He chuckled some more. "Sorry, I didn't know." Shrugging his shoulders, he walked around and put himself between her and the bed of flowers. He starred at her playfully, hoping to get a reaction from her.
However, Aerith continued to avoid his gaze. "Why aren't you still at the restaurant?" she asked curiously. Though she was interested to know, Aerith still kept her eyes wandering, hoping to find anything that would keep her attention away from him.
He laughed at how flustered she was getting. Instead of answering her question, he bent down to get a closer look at the flowers. "You seem to share a lot with these little guys. Are they good at keeping secrets?"
Aerith blushed. He was teasing her again. "I guess…"
He smiled. "Okay then, listen up you guys," he said, addressing the flowers. "I have something that I really want to get off my chest. Would you be willing to listen?"
Aerith raised her brow. His comment had caught her attention. "What would that be?"
"Shhhh," he said. "This is a super, special, awesome secret... So, you're not allowed to hear."
Aerith began to pout. Her momentary shyness immediately vanished as she stepped forward and gave him a light tap on the shoulder. "What's so important that you can't tell me?"
Lifting up his head, he grinned as he starred up at her face. "Did you share your thoughts with me?"
Aerith felt her face reddening once more. She quickly turned herself around, the earlier embarrassment she felt all coming back. "Fine," she muttered under her breath.
He sighed in relief as he turned back to the flowers. "Listen up guys," he said calmly. "There's this girl. Real pretty."
Aerith flinched. She turned her head around slightly to get a look at him. As if on cue, he also turned around. He grinned when he realized he had caught her attention. "Scratch that. She's drop dead gorgeous."
Aerith remained silent, trying her best to appear indifferent.
He let out a soft sigh, turning back to the flowers. "What can I say? Not only is she pretty, but she's real sweet too. She's kind, independent, outgoing, and polite to boost. Definitely a girl I would bring home to show off to the folks. I've written quite a few letters to my mom about her actually."
Aerith began to blush uncontrollably. She couldn't help it. He was making it impossible for her to keep a straight face. The only thing that kept her from further embarrassment was the fact that he hadn't turned around.
"The only problem is," he said quietly. "She's a bit insecure…"
"…"
"Don't get me wrong you guys," he quickly added in. "She's not insecure in 'that' sense. In fact, she's a real confident young woman. Comfortable in her own skin, knows who she is, doesn't try to change for the sake of other people - doesn't give in easily to other people. A real strong girl."
"…"
"I guess the only thing she's 'insecure' about is her relationship with me."
"…"
"I guess it's my fault though," he frankly admitted. "I should do more to reassure her… I guess I just get so caught up in the moment that sometimes I forget to remind her how special she is to me."
Aerith bit on her bottom lip as she watched him quietly. He had his legs crossed together, scratching the back of his head as he pressed on.
"I mean. We've been together for awhile now. I can't exactly pinpoint when it had happened - it just did. I don't really think that far back."
"…"
"We haven't really done anything yet. No first kiss or anything like that."
"…"
"It's not like I don't want to," he argued. "But, you guys got to see it from my perspective. She's not like every other girl. She's one of a kind. A man can only expect to meet a woman like this once in a lifetime, and that's only if he's really lucky. I want our first kiss to be something memorable, something magical. That's the only reason I've been waiting so long."
"…"
"I thought everything was going well," he continued. "My position in SOLDIER makes it hard though. But we try to squeeze in as much time with each other as we can. And I try to jazz it up whenever I can. You guys know how it is – got to keep it fresh, lest she gets bored of me and finds someone else."
He let out a soft chuckle, and surprisingly, it prompted her to smile as well.
"I know what you guys are thinking. Sounds like we have it good, right? So why am I here talking to you buggers instead of spending quality time with her?" he asked, huffing out loud. "Well, we were on a date. I took her out to dinner, planned a little walk in the park afterwards. It was suppose to be a fun night. We even bumped into a couple of the fellas."
"…"
"Of course, I would have preferred for the two of us to be alone. But… I guess I'm just too well mannered. Being the polite guy that I am, I asked them to join in. I figured she wouldn't mind."
"…"
Aerith began to frown when she heard this. "Wouldn't kill you to say no to them once and awhile…"
"I guess she did mind," he added in, interrupting her train of thought. "Cause' before I even knew what was happening; she had hopped up and left. I tried calling out to her, telling her to wait up, but I guess the place was too loud and crowded for her to hear me."
"…"
"I tried to follow after her, but by the time I had stepped out of the restaurant, she was already long gone."
He laughed as he quickly stood up from the floor, wiping the dust off his pants. He turned himself around and gave her a warm smile. With that one look, Aerith found that the frown on her face had slowly started to disappear.
"Luckily," he said, stepping forward and wrapping his arms firmly around her slim waist. She didn't resist his touch though; neither did she try to avoid his gaze this time around.
"Luckily, I know her pretty well. I didn't think that she'd run off home," he said, shaking his head. "Nah. She'd be in this little church, tending to her flowers like always." He smiled as he stared lovingly into her eyes, brushing off the few strands of hair that were covering her face. "After all, this is the place her and I first met."
"…"
"…"
After a brief pause, Aerith finally decided to speak up. "Do you really write to your parents about me?"
"Yep."
"Well," she said nervously, tapping on her sides. "What do you tell them?"
He took a moment to ponder her question. Then, he let out a soft chuckle. "Well, let's just say if I ever go to visit them in Gongaga, my mom would probably drag me all over town to pick out an engagement ring for you."
She blinked at him, stunned and at a loss for words.
"It's not that far off, is it?" he asked, chuckling a bit. "Oh come on! Would marrying me really be that bad?" He gave her a boyish grin as he teased.
"…"
Aerith felt her face reddening once again. She didn't know how to respond to that. "You didn't have to go chasing after me you know," she tried explaining. "I would have been perfectly fi-"
She didn't get a chance to finish. Before she was even aware of what was happening, he had swooped down and pressed his lips gently against hers. Aerith eyes widened, a bit startled by his impulse. But, she didn't find herself pulling away. Instead, she closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck, diving into the moment.
There were no words to describe her feelings. It was all so overwhelming. And yet, she couldn't think of another time when she had been this happy. She would have liked to stay in that position forever. With much hesitance, the two finally broke apart; the need for oxygen slowly taking over their passion.
As they split apart, he pulled her in closer. As she looked up, Aerith could see that he had a ridiculously goofy smile on his face. This made her blush; as she knew she was probably wearing the same exact smile.
Still, Aerith didn't care how ridiculous the two of them looked. She was soaring through cloud nine.
He smiled, slowly stroking her hair as he kissed her temple. "You know I love you… right?"
She stayed silent for a moment, only to lean forward and rest her head against his chest.
"There was never any doubt."
