Escape

by The Canadian HoneyBadger

ONESHOT! A prisoner of the Dark Eldar must make his escape or die at the hands of some horrific torture device. Swearing, blood, and more than a little bit of certified bad-assery in this rough-sketch of an idea I had. Don't expect a sequel chapter but maybe a rewrite... eventually.

I looked around my gray and darkened cell, it was dank dark and smelt of piss. I wrinkled my nose and walked the guards poking in the back with rifles. I walked and sat down at the 2 dark elder warriors they ignored me except to just give me a good kick to the ribs I feel onto m side while the guard chuckled evilly and walked out. I glared at the door the solid wooden door with an iron flap to check on me, it was as if the door was mocking me. I made mental note to break it when I escaped. I observed my cell quickly it had all the necessities but just enough so that I wouldn't die. A sink, a toilet, and a bed hanging off the wall. I knew immediately what to use as weapons and how to make my escape. The plan would take some time coming up with and so I fell asleep dreaming.

I woke to the sound of the door opening, it was a slave bringing me some food while a dark elder watched suspiciously as the slave started bring it forward. I studied him he had was shaven bald and had cuts bruises and other old injuries on him his small beady eyes looked into mine. Suddenly the slave grinned and threw the trays contents at me laughing nasally and walked out the door again. I heard a thump and a yell that something along the lines of "that's my job scum!"I sighed and looked at my prison clothes all it was a pair of ragged pants and they were now even dirtier than before. I smiled and looked the spoon they gave me. I smiled and began drawing the back end of it against the floor giving a teeth grinding shhhhk sound.

10 hours later of that it was sharp enough to do slight damage. I smiled slightly and moved toward the sink I climbed and jumped several times on it wincing as pain resounded through my sandal clad feet. After a few jumps the rickety sink collapsed I fell getting sprayed by the water as it sprayed across my cell I moved beside the door and stayed stock still. The door busted open and a guard scrambled in rifle at the ready. I grabbed his head and tilted it to the side before he could react I stabbed the sharpened end of the spoon into his jugular killing him I held him my hand over his helmet's mouth piece as his struggles became less and less until he moved no more. I then moved quickly grabbing what I would need.

The first thing I did was unclip the rifle holster on his back and used it myself I then picked up the rifle and placed it on my back. Then I stomped on the two blades on his helmet snapping them off, I grabbed them and moved outside. Apparently my antics with had miraculously gone unnoticed. I grinned and studied the area outside my cell it was a large gray hall with several cell doors there was a table. With a bit of uneaten bread and some meats of some sort. I grinned and ate some bread but left the meat, who knows what or who these bastards ate. before I ate though I noticed a large pile of rope. I cut it using the helmets blades and tied them to my wrists; making wrist blades. I then looped the rest around my shoulder. I finished the stale bread and looked at the door at the end of the hall… freedom. I opened it quietly and opened it into a great hall; it was red and look like the inside of a throat, how...lovely nice to see the guys decorate their halls appropriately. I grimaced and continued moving quietly as I could, rifle at the ready. I moved forward and spotted a guard watching the exit attentively. I snuck up behind him and stabbed him with my wrist blade while snapping his neck he died noiselessly. I then snapped off the guy's helmet blades and tied one to my rifle making a makeshift bayonet. Then I grabbed his pouch and another rifle holster. I placed the second rifle in its holster and stuffed the second blade into the pouch I stolen. I then moved toward the door he was watching and opened it silently. It was a door to some sort of courtyard, luckily there was some sort of meeting and all the guards eyes were on the balcony, where what looked like the base commander was yelling out stuff in their alien language. I didn't bother to listen even though I knew their language.

I slid across walls that looked like they were made of bone and steel watching the man on the balcony yell more stuff out to the troops. I arrived at the gate and groaned… it was open but the portcullis was closed meaning I'd have to either open it or somehow get over the walls that's when I spotted the plane… it was a hover scooter the space marines used and it was perfect for my needs. I moved over to it ignoring the fact that there was a lot of blood on the passenger seat.

I grabbed the key that was in the ignition and turned;

With a loud VROOOM the vehicle turned on with a yells the dark elder opened fire on me.

"Maybe next time FUCKERS!" I yelled and start to open fire on the crowd; they had energy pistols (they left their rifles in an armory locker in the corner.) I had two chain guns… it was a slaughter, after a large number of them had gone down I hit the accelerator and started to lift off the ground. I watched as several elder scrambled for their main weapons. Just then a elder jumped on the front of the scooter holding a black energy sword.

"SHIT" I swore and ducked under a slash and frantically turned and heaved back and forth trying to shake my opponent off. He grabbed on chain gun and I grinned. I pressed the trigger and he spun around broke his legs on the other chain gun, and was flung off as the gun span ready to fire. I didn't turn around to watch him to slam into the ground instead I flew past the defenses and was free.

free at last...