Stef and Lena confront Jude about his feelings after he yelled at Lena.
(Just a short thought on what the moms did about Jude's behavior.)
"I'm sorry I yelled at you and walked out of the test." Jude said again as his moms walked into his room.
Stef and Lena both sat down on his bed next to him, watching him. They could tell that he was sorry for what he'd done and hadn't meant for it to be hurtful.
"We know you're worried about Callie." Stef began. "We are too but we are doing everything we possibly can to fix this and we won't stop until we do."
"Honey, sometimes things don't go the way we want them to but even then we still have to go on. And disappearing isn't the way either."
"I didn't disappear." Jude said, looking down.
"You didn't answer our calls." Stef pointed out. "That wasn't going to help you and it certainly wasn't going to help Callie. If you want to make something happen you have to do it the right way."
Jude was silent for a moment, trying to find a way to share his feelings but struggling with actually doing so. Both moms watched him and waited patiently for him to work out whatever he needed to in his mind.
"That's not why I disappeared." Jude said softly.
"What isn't?" Stef asked.
"I didn't disappear and not answer your calls because Callie was taken from the house." Jude admitted. He knew this is what his moms would think because it would never strike them that he was afraid of them at that point.
"Then why?" Lena asked, suddenly confused. Jude had made it clear that the test wasn't as important as Callie and the family. "Because you think we're getting a divorce?"
Jude shook his head but didn't look up. He wasn't quite ready to admit the real reason.
"Jude." Stef prompted, trying to get the boy to open up.
"I was afraid." Jude admitted, still looking down at his hands.
"Of what?" Lena asked with concern. If he wasn't worried about Callie then what was there to worry about.
"Of coming home." Jude answered, finally looking up at his moms. "I had planned on just coming home and spending time by myself when I left the test but then..." He trailed off, uncomfortable about going on.
"But then..." Stef encouraged one more time.
"But then I decided to see Callie instead." Jude said, knowing even as he said it that Stef wouldn't buy it.
"Why?" Stef asked. Her tone letting Jude know that she knew there was more even though she wasn't sure what it was.
"I was afraid to come home." Jude said. "I yelled at Lena and I'd never done that before."
Both moms looked at their son with sad eyes. They knew that even though he'd been with them a year and they had never given him any reason to fear them, old habits die hard and the boy had an inbuilt need to protect himself.
"Honey, just because you get mad or get into trouble doesn't mean we won't love you." Lena said. "You were having a rough day and you acted out. All kids do that sometimes."
"That's what Callie and Rita said." Jude told them. After talking to them he realized that he was probably reacting in an unnecessary way with this family but he couldn't help it - it was the first time he'd ever argued with one of his moms and Callie wasn't even there to help him through it.
"They were right." Stef said. "It's okay to be angry sometimes and it's even okay to be angry with us sometimes. It doesn't mean we're going to hurt you."
"I guess I knew that." Jude said. "I just... wasn't sure."
"Honey, all the kids have done things that's made us mad." Lena said. "And we've done things that have made them mad. We've even done things that make each other mad." Lena added with a smile as she glanced at Stef. "It doesn't change the love we feel."
"If you are worried about something you come talk to us." Lena said. "We would have told you that we aren't giving up on Callie. Even Callie knows that."
"Even if you make a mistake you can always come to us." Stef added. "When mama called me to say that you'd walked out of class and just disappeared there was no anger there. She was just worried about you."
"I know, I'm sorry." Jude said, looking directly at Lena. "You didn't even yell at me when I came home."
"We just wanted to know you were safe." Lena said. "That's all that mattered."
"I should have know that." Jude said, realizing that deep down he already knew that he was safe.
"You did know it." Stef said. "Sometimes it's just hard to let go of a habit."
Jude nodded, Stef had hit the nail right on the head.
"So what were you thinking when you left that test?" Lena asked again, hoping that Jude would now open up to them.
"I just couldn't focus on it." Jude answered honestly. "I was so scared for Callie. Nothing ever works out for her and..." He paused, trying to figure out what to say. "and I wish I never got adopted without her."
"Why?" Stef asked.
"Because, now she's doing it all alone." Jude answered. "At least before we were in it all together."
Stef smiled slightly but sadly. These two children had been all each other had to rely on and even though Callie had spent her life trying to protect her little brother, Jude, in his own small way, had looked out for her too.
"It's what Callie wanted for you." Lena said. "I remember you saying you didn't want to get adopted when we found out about Robert but Callie wanted this for you."
"I know." Jude said. "But I should have said no anyways. I just wanted it so bad that I hoped it wouldn't be too hard for Callie later on." The regret was clear in Jude's voice and it broke his moms' hearts.
"Honey, Callie isn't doing it alone." Stef said. "Just because you are adopted doesn't mean that she doesn't still have you. She does and she always will and she also has all of us. Adopted or not we are always going to be her family and we will fight for her until the end of time."
"But I'm never taken from the house. She's already been taken three times." Jude said. "First they sent her to Girls United and then to that foster lady and now to Rita. When does she get to feel safe?"
"She is safe." Stef said. "Even if she's not under this roof, we will always make sure that she's safe. Wherever she goes, I will make sure it's to a place where no harm will come to her."
"And until she is truly in our home for good we all just have to keep reminding her that we're there for her." Lena added, showing the boy that in a small way even he could help. "Be there for her, talk to her just like you did when it was just the two of you. Show her that nothing has changed between you just because you are adopted and she's not."
"She still looks out for me." Jude said. "Even though I have you now. She yelled at me more than you did when we broke into Taylor's house that night." Jude smiled to himself even though he had been so angry with Callie at the time.
"She wants the best for you just like you want the best for her." Lena said. "That's exactly what family is and even though you fight or argue or do and say things the other doesn't like you still love each other and you're not afraid to go back to each other."
She wanted to make it clear to Jude that just because he hadn't been with them his whole life like he'd been with Callie didn't meant that it didn't apply to them as well. He was always free to come to them no matter how crazy he drove them or how mad they were at him.
"Are you going back to each other?" Jude asked, looking directly at his moms, no longer afraid to ask them anything.
"We never left each other." Stef said. "We have our rough patches too but I love mama with all my heart."
"And I love mom too." Lena smiled. "Even though she drives me crazy."
"So you're not getting a divorce?" Jude confirmed.
"No." Both women answered together.
"We may have some things to work through but I promise we both want to fix it and that's half the battle won." Stef added.
"Good." Jude said with a smile. "Because I love my family and I want it to stay together."
Both moms leaned in to hug their son. Their kids may have many scars from their past and many walls to protect themselves but slowly, bit by bit and brick by brick they were clearing them away and hopefully one day all that would be left would just be carefree, happy children.