Author's Notes: I do not own Doctor Who. This is sort of a story I've had rattling around for a while and I rewatched Human Nature/The Family of Blood today and decided it had to be written. There shouldn't be any spoilers you haven't already read about in Regarding Mrs Smith. Consider this as part of a Twenty Twelve temporary series of stories set in the Regarding Mrs Smith universe in the summer of 2012- not that I'm abandoning the other ones- but it's just the whole spirit of the thing. Who wants to read a story that occurs this summer in December? Anyway, hope you like it and let me know what you think. Happy reading!

A/N: 7/20 Sorry if you had to click on this like a hundred times to read it. The thing just would not publish, but if you're reading this, it has. Anyway, sorry.

It was a pleasant afternoon in July in London. Donna Smith-Noble pushed the pram up the high street. She had been spending most of the summer here since her third child was due soon and since the Doctor had been summoned by Torchwood to stop the river monster that was intent on ruining the Thames River Pageant of the Queen's Diamond Jubilee. Today, Jack and the rest of Torchwood had summoned the Doctor to stop the ghost of Catherine Howard as she was threatening to ruin the Olympic Equestrian Events. She missed travelling in the TARDIS, but the city was abuzz with excitement this summer. Luckily, the Old Girl had understood about Donna's wish not to give birth in a space cave and completely agreed that Donna had to take matters into her own hands.

"Books!," Chloe shouted from the double pushchair.

"Yes," said Donna, looking at the shop. There was a queue around the block. She wondered what it was for. She did hate being so out of the loop on the TARDIS. She saw a huge poster for the Journal of Impossible Things by Verity Newman.

"Can we go in?," asked Zara.

"Yeah," said Donna. "I don't see why not."

Donna pushed the girls past the queue and into the shop where she explained that they just wanted to look at the children's books. She didn't even know who this bloody Verity Newman was. The bookseller looked at her like she was mad after that and let her go on her way. Donna settled in the children's area with Chloe and Zara. She grabbed one of the one billion copies of Verity Newman's book, The Journal of Impossible things, - what sort of title was that?- so that she could have a look for herself.

"What about this book?," Zara asked Donna.

Donna looked. "No, that's Twilight. We can't have you thinking it's a good idea to fall in love with vampires." She took the book away. "Actually, any time a teenage girl falls in love with a supernatural being, it's usually a bad idea."

"What about Belle and the Beast?," asked Zara.

"Well, if I was her mother, I never would have stood for it," said Donna. "What about a nice Paddington?"

"Can't I read A Brief History of Time? Daddy said it was funny."

Donna shook her head. "No, you need to be able to talk to other children at the park. There it is. Paddington Goes For Gold. You love Paddington. Now, be sure and help your sister find something."

Zara walked back as Donna started flipping through the book. She noticed something very curious about the book.

It was about her bloody husband.

"What?," Donna shouted garnering the attention of the entire children's section.

"Catherine, get back here!," the Doctor shouted after Henry VIII's fifth wife. His mobile rang and he looked to see it was Donna. He tossed it to Martha. "See what it is! Jack, come on!"

Jack followed after the Doctor. Martha rolled her eyes and answered the phone as she walked towards the waterfront as the men followed Catherine towards the London Eye.

"Hello?"

"Martha, what's happened? Is he alright?" It was Donna.

"He's fine," said Martha, watching as the Doctor and Jack pushed through the throng of tourists waiting for the Eye. Then she watched as the Doctor began climbing up it. "At least he is for now. Anything I can help with?"

"Not unless you know something about The Journal of Impossible Things and Joan Redfern."

Martha nodded and smiled. "Oh, I thought you might run into that. I told him to warn you, but frankly, he's frightened of you after the second trimester."

"Well, who is she?"

"Did the Doctor tell you about the time we were in 1913?"

"No."

"Figures," said Martha. The Doctor and Jack were now both hanging off the Eye, their coats whipping in the wind. "Anyway, he had to become human to hide from this Family of Blood so I got stuck looking after him in 1913. He was a teacher at this boarding school-"

"What? Like Goodbye Mr. Chips?"

"Yeah, a lot like that and I had to be the housemaid-"

"The housemaid?," Donna exclaimed. "You had to be the bloody housemaid?"

"Yeah," said Martha.

"I am seriously considering putting you up for sainthood, do you know that? You had to listen to him go on about Rose, get stuck with him in 1969, walk the Earth and be a bloody housemaid," said Donna.

"Anyway, Joan Redfern was the nurse at the school and John Smith fell in love with her. He had a journal, he kept writing in it all the stories and bits about his life as the Doctor."

"Wait, so this woman is just ripping off his life story? And selling it?," Donna shrieked.

"Well-" said Martha. Jack had slipped and now the Doctor was holding him by the hand. "Oh, Donna, I've got to go. Jack's probably about to die."

Donna hung up the mobile. She gathered the girls and their selections and jumped in the queue, fuming. She stood, preparing her remarks for when she met Verity Newman.

When she got closer, she could hear Verity and all her "No, it's real, I found this in my grandmother's attic" blah, blah, blah. Donna shook her head in silent fury and then it was finally her turn.

"Hello," she said.

"Donna! Donna Smith-Noble!" She paused. "Right. You said hello. I thought you were going to ask what name, but I've got something to say about you and your little book!"

"Okay," said Verity, her eyes darting around the shop.

"Where do you get off, lady? You take my husband's journal and write down his life story and put it in a book and make all kinds of Harry Potter money-"

"Well, I haven't made that much-"

"Hush it!"

"Okay."

"Meanwhile, I've got three children to support! And they're going to want to go to University! Probably on Saturn or something. Do you know what university costs on Saturn?"

"No, I don't suppose so-"

"Neither do I! But I bet it's a lot! I could write a book! I could write a whole bloody saga! Book one, I almost get eaten by a giant spider! Book two, I wave at fat! Book three, I end up in Pompeii on Volcano Day!"

"Pardon me, did you say giant spider?"

"Yes, I did. Want to hear about the time the giant beetle was on my back? That's around book fifteen or so."

"Oh, my God, you're her," said Verity with a sudden realization.

"What?," asked Donna.

Verity flipped through the pages of the book until she found an illustration. "The Bride. You're her."

Donna peered over at the drawing. It was her. In the wedding dress from the doomed ceremony with Lance inside the TARDIS.

"I'm in the book?," asked Donna.

"Yes," said Verity.

"Is that more than the other people or-"

"Well," said Verity, "the girl, Rose, is in it a bit at the beginning. At one point, I had an editor who wanted to do the whole thing with just her and launch a serious campaign aimed at the teen market."

Donna snorted. "Sounds about right."

"Well, Madame de Pompadour is there for a long chapter. I have a good bit with the housemaid, Martha-"

"Oi, she's a doctor."

"Your part is three chapters? In fact, my grandmother wrote in her journal, she wasn't certain John Smith ever would have been happy with her because it seemed like he was in love with you."

"Oh," said Donna. She pushed the book forward on the table. "So, you can just sign that to the Doctor and Donna."

The Doctor came home after finally capturing Catherine Howard who had turned out to be an artificial organic life form imbued with the memories and personality of Catherine Howard. This was of course after Jack had slept with her and been killed and come back. All in all, it was a long day. Martha's little newsflash that Donna had found out about Verity Newman's book had not been what he wanted to hear. So, he did what he could. He came in with flowers and found the girls having supper. Zara was tossing Esther little slices of banana. Chloe was eating happily. Donna was at the table, looking at a laptop.

"Daddy!," they exclaimed.

"Hello," said the Doctor, planting a kiss on each of their cheeks. He held out the bouquet of violets for Donna. "I thought you might like these."

"Oh, thank you," said Donna with a smile. She took a sniff. "They're lovely."

"Shall I put them in water?"

"Please," said Donna. She looked back at the laptop screen. "I got Indian takeaway for us. I'll sort it all in a minute."

"No problem, I can do it," said the Doctor as he finished with the violets. "Martha told me about Verity Newman."

"Oh, yeah."

He paused. "You're not upset or anything?"

"No, I'm fine with it. I'm three chapters of the book. That is until the sequel."

"The sequel?," asked the Doctor.

"Yeah, I might have run one or two plot ideas by Verity. We had tea. She's actually quite lovely."

"Right..." said the Doctor. He got the plates for the takeaway and sat next to Donna. "What are you looking at on that laptop?"

"Oh, just some things about Verity and book reviews, that sort of thing."

"Is that all?"

"Well," said Donna, "did you know we have fan fiction?"

The Doctor shut the lid on the laptop. "I think that's enough, Donna."

"God, I was just looking," said Donna. She started fixing her plate. "I was just curious. It's not every day there's fan fiction about me."

"Let's just drop it," said the Doctor.

Donna snorted. "Well, if you don't like what they have with you and me, you're certainly not going to like what they have with you and Jack."

The Doctor groaned. Zara and Chloe laughed even though they didn't know what was funny.

"Yeah, let's just leave it on the Internet," said the Doctor.