Chapter One
I tell ya, sometimes life is so good.
I never used to think that, mind. Centuries ago, I thought life was a piece of shite but that was back before I found my family and learned how to be happy again. In the two hundred and thirty five years since I'd been with them, we'd had our twists and turns, our ups and downs, moments of joy and moments of sorrow but we've always managed to get through them and come out stronger than before.
Of course we had that crisis ten years ago but even that ended happily when my wife and I gave birth to three wonderful treasures. Three more children to add to our happy brood. That's something else I never thought I would be back before I met Alan for the second time. Up until I met Madison and Dorothy, I'd only been a father to Dex and I wasn't much of a father, truth be told. I always regretted not being there for him and when Dot asked to be my daughter, I was determined to get it right the second time and now after several children, who I'm happy to say are well rounded, happy adults, I have the skills necessary to tackle three hyperactive ten year olds. A boy and two girls who I'm exceedingly proud of. My darlings, who two years ago began their formal Time Lord and Lady training. My Chaska and Sokanon went off to the Time Lord academy and my darling little Namid started lessons with the TARDIS since up until recently she was blind and since she's the first blind child to be born on New Gallifrey, there was no way they could accommodate her disability. But now that she can see again, she'll go with her brother and sister to the academy as soon as she's caught up on reading and writing.
Ah, the academy. I helped found that along with my family and unlike the dull, strict academy I went to in my youth, this academy focuses on both the intellectual and creative sides of the brain. So much so, that most students chose a sort of second course of study in addition to their Time Lord training. My Soki is a brilliant artist, been drawin' since she could hold a pencil in her hand, so she's taking art classes. Chaska is gifted musically and is learning the violin and guitar and since Namid grew up with her Braille books, she's developed a love of reading and now wants to write books of her own. I couldn't be more proud of all of them.
So from nine in the morning till three in the afternoon, Sokanon and Chaska are at the academy with their cousins and Namid is with the TARDIS in a special classroom my ship built where Mi-mi can learn from her without any distractions. And for the moment, that's where I'm at too, although I'm in my lab rather than the classroom. My dimensional stabilizer is a bit wonky so I'm spending the afternoon working on it so we can go out and have more adventures in my ship.
Anyway, here I am, tinkering with this ruddy dimensional stabilizer that seems to break down more and more as the years go by. I believe the old girl is feeling her age now and I can't blame her because sometimes I feel that way as well.
I didn't hear my Namid when she came to the lab door. Even though I'm glad she's cured, it's odd not hearing that click, click, click her cane made. That did have its uses since Namid was and still is a very active little girl. I was so engrossed in my work that Namid startled me when she came up to my side to see what I was doing. All three children have inherited my natural curiosity for things and she's constantly at my side, asking questions and seeing what I'm doing. And even more so now that she can see.
"Hey, whatcha doin'?" Namid asked, leaning in so she can see better.
I grin at that, deciding I'll be a bit cheeky with the little scamp.
"It's a flippy-flopper hoopajoob," I say with wide eyes. "Makes turnips."
"Right, Daddy, pull the other one," she says.
God, I love her accent. Because I speak with a Cockney accent and my wife speaks with an American one, my children sorta split the difference and all three of them drift in and out of both accents depending on what word they're saying, so it's sorta this weird pseudo British/American accent that's not quite Cockney but not quite American either. It's as if an American is occasionally trying to be British or vice versa. And thanks to growing up around the two of us and Alan, my children also use both British and American words, idioms and slang which is also amusing to me. I often joke to Rain that it's a good thing we live on New Gallifrey because the poor dears would be gawked at in two separate countries on two separate continents on Earth.
"What is it really, Daddy?" Namid asks.
"It's a dimensional stabilizer," I reply.
My daughter nods sagely as if she knows exactly what that is. Another trait I suspect she picked up from her mother since her mother has often done the same thing when I know she hasn't a clue what I'm on about.
"You 'bout done?" she asks.
"Not really, why?"
"I want you to come play."
"Mi-mi, I'm a bit busy right now and aren't you s'posed to be studying with the TARDIS?"
I can tell from the are you a moron look on her face that once again I have misjudged the time. I glance at my watch and see it's half past three. Yup, I'm a moron. Luckily, my brother picks his son up along with my children and comes back in the evening with Rose to join us for tea, otherwise my son and daughter would be standing there most days for hours on end waiting for their thick father to realize the time and come get them. That is one thing that has not changed with being a father, my ability to keep track of time.
"Alright, I see that lessons have ended but I'm still busy here," I protest as I point to the stabilizer. "Go ask your Uncle Alan to play with you and your brother and sister or find Rei and play with her."
Rei, the fox that Imiko left with us has been a constant companion of my children almost from the moment she arrived. She also fancies the TARDIS and just like Blizzard centuries before, I often find her curled up on my jump seat, happily dozing. God, I miss those dogs. I never realized how much I missed having animals around until Rei came to live with us.
"You're always fixing things!" Namid says, throwing her hands up. "I don't wanna play with Uncle Alan or Rei, I wanna play with you. You need to get out of this TARDIS and have some fun!"
As she says the last statement, she has a stern look on her face and is wagging her finger at me and I'm reminded of how many times my wife has done and said the same thing whenever I spend long hours in the TARDIS working on stuff. In truth, I really have been in here for hours. I was in here before Namid came in for her lessons and now that I'm not fixated on my task, I suddenly realize that my butt is hurting from sitting on the metal stool for that long. I stand up to ease the pressure on my butt cheeks and realize that was the wrong thing to do when my daughter takes that as a sign I'm going to go play with her. Before I can explain, she, in imitation of me, is tearing out the door and down the hall, presumably to get the things she needs for our playtime. For a brief moment, I'm tempted to just sit back down and hope that her urge to play with me will pass once she gets around her brother and sister, but glancing down at the flippin' stabilizer, I suddenly realize I really do need to take a break from it and I put my hands on my back and stretch my aching muscles before I go out the door in search of my daughter.
I walk out the door of the TARDIS, shut it and head out of the garage. The moment I step inside, I see Namid and my other son and daughter with Christopher. All of them are in a huddle, presumably discussing what they want to play. I try to sneak past them and follow the voices of my brother and sister who are now with my wife in the kitchen.
"Aha!"
I freeze and the children giggle when I pretend to be shocked that they've discovered me trying to skulk past them. Instantly the children run around me and hem me in so I can't get away. I put on my most winning smile as I look down at Sokanon and Chaska who are on my left and right sides.
"Hello, my children, enjoy your day at the academy?" I say cheerfully. "You did? Good. Well, time for homework before supper. 'Scuse me."
Nope, that didn't work. The children giggle as they grab onto my legs which means in order to walk I'll have to drag them along. I notice Rei is lying on the couch and I send a silent plea to the fox to come help me but apparently foxes aren't telepathic because she could possibly care less that I'm hemmed in at the moment.
Then my salvation comes out the door of the kitchen. My brother, who is always up for playtime with the children. But then again, Daisy, his TARDIS isn't that old and isn't constantly in need of servicing. However, they apparently already asked him because he comes up to our little group, a wide smile on his face.
"So you did find him and got him away from his work," Alan says to the children.
"Yeah, but he doesn't wanna come play. He's being difficult," Namid whinges.
"Difficult? My brother is never difficult. That's not even a word in his vocabulary," Alan says.
He grins at me. An infectious grin that spreads to my face. My brother has a natural ability to put people at ease and cheer them up, no matter what their mood is. He comes closer to me.
"Listen, mate, I realize you have to fix the whosie-watcha-ma-callit of the day," he said to him. "But it's time to take a break and have a bit of fun with the kiddies. So…come on, what'd ya say? A little romp before we eat?"
"I'm not gonna win this, am I?" I asked good-naturedly.
"No!" five voices chorus out and I sigh and smile.
"Okay, I'll play with you lot and that includes the big kid in front of me."
I grin when all of them, Alan included, cheer at that which makes our wives laugh and the laughter that floats in from the kitchen is music to my ears.
"So what do you have in mind for playtime?" I ask them.
"I'm you!" my son says, "and Soki's my companion and Mi-mi and Uncle Alan and Chris are the evil people."
"Good," Alan says, rubbing his hands together.
"What am I then?" I ask.
There it is again, the I'm a moron look.
"I'm the captive, right?" I say.
"Right!" the children say in unison as Alan snickers.
"Well, you're in luck because I've been the captive many times," I say. "So I know exactly what to do. So what are we doing?"
"I'm an evil scientist that's opening up the void so we can let the Daleks loose that you put in there," Christopher says.
Over the past five or six years, when all of them were old enough, I had frequently told the children about some of my adventures which is why they have knowledge of the Battle of Canary Wharf.
"Okay, if you're the one in charge, what am I then?" Alan asks.
"You're…Boobs, my assistant," Christopher says.
"Boobs?" Alan says as Rose and Rain roar with laughter from the kitchen. "My name is Boobs?"
My children are all giggling hysterically which makes me laugh. Alan, my beloved joker of a brother, extends his hand to me.
"Hiya, captive, I'm Boobs, pleased to meet ya," he says.
I shake hands with him.
"Well, since I'm not the Doctor…I'm…"
I pause to think of a name for myself.
"Spongebob!" Sokanon squeals.
Eh, works for me.
"Okay, I'm Spongebob," I say as everyone laughs hysterically. "So who are you, my daughters?"
"Frick and frack?" Alan says, "Bambi and Thumper?"
He winks at me.
"Shiver and Shake?" he says which makes me chuckle.
"How 'bout Breasts and Jugs?" Chaska asks as Christopher giggles.
So…either the boys are becoming interested in the opposite sex or they're being boys and like spouting out rude words to shock me and everyone else. However, that doesn't sit well with the misses who leans out the door and gives our son a stern look. He quickly apologizes and she goes back in the kitchen.
"How 'bout Rainbow and Sunshine," Sokanon says.
My son looks like he's about to vomit.
"Ugh, those aren't evil people's names," he says.
"How 'bout Storm and Tornado then," Alan says.
Both girls consider it and then nod.
"Who's who then?" I say, looking from one to the other.
"I'll be Storm," Sokanon says.
"I'll be Tornado then."
I look at my brother who is sniggering.
"So, for the first time ever in my long career of fighting evil, I've been captured by Boobs, Storm, Tornado and…"
I look at my nephew.
"And your name is?"
"Doctor Doom!" he says in a low, ominous voice.
"Isn't that name already taken?" Alan asks.
"Isn't Spongebob already taken?" I counter.
"Point taken. Okay, Doctor Doom, you lead Spongebob here outside so we can do our worst to him," Alan says.
"Very well. Go, my servants, take Spongebob and tie him up somewhere!"
"No! Have mercy!" I say melodramatically as everyone except Chaska herds me out the door.