I had this idea during my stay at the cottage; I couldn't get it out on the computer fast enough. At the cottage it was raining, so I took out an old puzzle I finished it but, to my distress, there were a few pieces missing, and all I could think of was 'how would Near feel?' So from that small thought grew into a oneshot. I hope everyone enjoys it, since I haven't edited my other stories yet. (Laugh) I hope everyone enjoys it, and reviews!
Summary: Near thinks about his past, of how Mello and him fell in love. He always knew he would find the missing piece to his puzzle, he just didn't believe it would be taken away so soon. Ending is sad, although most of it is happy.
Disclaimer: I did not help create the anime/manga/movies or anything else that has to with Death Note. If I did have control over the characters and the storyline, it would not have had any thing intelligent in it; it would however have a lot of lemons/limes and L x Light and Mello x Near in it. The only thing I did was create this FREE story.
Rating: M due to violence, swearing, lemons/limes, death, and sadness.
"Our
lives are made in these small hours
These little wonders,
These
twists and turns of fate
Time falls away but these small
hours
These small hours still remain."
Near sat on the navy blue carpet; his knee held tightly to his chest. Near's white pajamas were slightly wrinkled along with his socks. He was twirling his curly hair in his fingers, looking down at his white puzzle. Against the carpet he looked like someone had taken a movie and inverted the colours, causing the scene to look strange and unnatural.
Near looked at the completed puzzle beneath his feet, it was completely white except for one missing piece that seemed to mock him, the carpets colour leaking through the opening. Near stared at the space that seemed to go on forever, it wasn't as if he was obsessive compulsive and needed the puzzle completely finished, it was that it allowed him to focus on the part of his life he had resented and wished to throw in the farthest corner of his mind.
It had been about a year since Mello and Matt had perished and Near had taken up the torch of carrying the title of L. Although no one could ever be the perfect L; Near tried to be the L he knew how to be. Even though he had known that L had done horrible things in the past that affected him, he knew that he would never do anything as shameful as fall in love. Near would never admit to his greatest downfall.
Mello had been the lucky the person he had fallen for; 'head over heals' as the expression goes. Near didn't understand his love for a man, much less a man who hated his guts. Near had denied it for as long as he could, yet somewhere along the road he had accepted it.
Mello was the missing piece to his puzzle.
Near glanced at the clock, he did not really read the numbers, only looking at the soft red glow of the light. Near knew that he did miss the leather clad blond. He would never have admitted it to anyone, but if anyone could make his emotions show it was him. Mello could strip his mask away, and show his true colours.
Near glanced once more at the puzzle, he let his mind slowly drift to think of the past; letting the cool embrace of his memories wash over his mind. Closing his eyes he let himself drift off to the first time he ever met Mello.
Near held onto his small stuffed animal tightly, his cheeks a little rosy from embarrassment as he looked up with the same large eyes at Mello. Rodger introduced them quickly than ran off to separate two children arguing over if Princess Diana's death was really accidental. Near didn't really listen, he was much too interested in the blond standing before him.
Near started to twirl his hair, a habit he got into before he even knew of L's existence. Mello glared down at him for a minute before saying, "Hi."
Near didn't know what happened in him, but from that moment on all he felt was an uncanny admiration for the blond. Near glanced at Rodger for a moment before saying, "Hello, what is your name?"
"It's Mello. Are you an idiot or something?" Mello said looking down at him.
"No, but your name cannot possibly be Mello, why do you insist on calling yourself a fake name?" Near asked, backing back a step away so he could stare in Mello's eyes.
"Rodger hasn't told you anything has he?"
"I do not know anything about this location, except that I believe I was brought here because of my intelligence."
"I see you two have been talking to each other," Rodger said sauntering over, "Mello this is…"
"Near," Near said after Rodger looked down at him expectantly. If everyone didn't know Mello's true name, than they shouldn't know his as well.
"Near," Rodger said trying it out, "Very well, what do you think Mello?"
"Why should I care what he names himself?" Mello snapped.
"Near is going to join your class tomorrow," Rodger said before adding, "He got a better score on his entrance exam than you did, Mello."
Mello's face seemed to transform from irritated to angry. Mello glared at Near saying to Rodger, "Well, that's nice."
"I hope both of you can use your minds together, and excel," Rodger said walking away, than stopping suddenly to say to Near, "You can stay here and play."
Near nodded once, hugging his stuffed polar bear to his chest. He had gotten his polar bear from his mother when he was sick in the hospital; sadly they had been unable to pay for his hospital bills once he was better. His parents had thought it best they send him to some place where he could stretch his mind, and get taken care of properly; no on was ever home to take care of him since their jobs took up all their time. The polar bear was the only thing he had left of them since the percentage of meeting them again was close to none.
Near looked at Mello wondering quietly to himself what he should say to the boy he liked so much, when Mello reached out with his long slender fingers and grabbed his polar bear. Near stared up at Mello, saying nothing, he wondered what Mello wanted with his beloved stuffed animal. It never occurred to Near that Mello would do anything horrible to his only possession he brought, other than the clothes on his back.
Mello brought the bear up to his face looking closely at it, scrutinizing all the little details, taking in the grungy look of the bear before walking away. Near followed Mello to the middle of the room, were Mello took the scissors in his hand and hacked off the polar bears head. Near gaped at what had happened, he would have never thought something so horrible would have happened. Mello glanced at Near, his frown turning into a grotesque smirk. Near only could look up in horror, why would Mello do this to him? They barely knew each other; it seemed hardly fair that Mello would hate him for no reason.
"Welcome to your new home," Mello ridiculed, "I hope you enjoy Hell."
"…" Near stared at Mello, his wide innocent holding no emotion; he was afraid that if he spoke the tears he was holding inside would spill out and take over his rationality. Mello placed the polar bears now even more distorted into Nears small hands. Mello looked at Near seeming to grow angrier than before because Near was showing no emotion, he tripped Near on his way out of the room in a hurry.
Near laid on the ground for a moment before slowly getting up and rubbing his knees. Near looked down at his polar bears head, feeling his eyes start to water he closed them for a moment. When he opened them he saw a child that looked about his age playing with a plane and a spaceship, Near walked over to the child.
"Hi, I'm Near."
"Hi there," the child replied before revealing his name, "I'm Joseph."
"Do you use your real name?" Near asked, observing the boy.
"Yes, I don't care if people know my name," Joseph looked at Near looking like he was contemplating something in his head before saying, "I'm not trying to become L's successor."
"L, I presume he is a special person of sorts."
"You don't know who he is?" Joseph said, looking taken back a little. "He is the most well known detective in the police forces around the world."
"…"Near let the information go through his head; it left open all sorts of questions.
"The closest to L that any of us have ever gotten to is Watari, he runs this place. Rodger, the guy who brought you here is more of an assistant."
"So no one knows his name or what L looks like?"
"Well, I heard that Watari not only know what he looks like but also he knows L's true name. All these things are just rumors though."
"Hmmm…" Near felt that if he was never going to meet the man named L there was no point on letting his thoughts dwell on the situation any longer.
"Could Near please come here," Rodger said standing in the front door.
"It was nice meeting you," Joseph said as Near started to walk to the door.
"I agree."
"If you would just follow me, there is someone who wishes to meet you," Rodger said walking down a few corridors. The walk there was quiet except for their soft foot prints echoing through the empty spaces. After a few moments they finally reached the door. Rodger told Near to go right in after a quick nock on the door.
"Hello Near," An older looking man with white hair and soft kind eyes said, "My name is Watari, please have a seat."
Near took a seat on the chair the man had pointed at, holding his polar bears head close to his chest, almost forgetting that it looked as if a wild animal had made it into a chew toy.
"Do you know much about this place?" Watari asked, his wrinkles changing as he talked.
"Not an abundant amount, but I believe I have the just of what this school is," Near said before continuing, "Is it some sort of school for children who are extremely intelligent?"
"Yes, but that is not all this school does. We are trying to create a successor, someone who will be able to take over another persons place."
"Am I correct by assuming this man is L?"
"Yes you are; have you been talking to any other students?"
Near nodded his head once, holding the bears head even closer. It seemed that the 'rumors' seemed to be more real than he first believed at the beginning.
"I see," Watari said, "What happened to your bear?"
"A small mishap with a boy and scissors," Near said not wanting to say Mello's name since he still had an admiration for the older boy.
"Mello," Watari said. "That boy will never learn…"
Near stared up at Watari wondering how he knew, unless incidents like his bear happened many times before. Near felt a little happier knowing that he wasn't the only one Mello seemed to dislike.
"Yes, well the reason that you were called down here is tomorrow you will take another test after your class, I am not going to reveal what it is until you pass."
"…" Near watched Watari stand up and give Near a small silver key with a number engraved on it.
"That key is for your room, and the number engraved on it is what room number is yours, here is a map of this place so you will not get lost."
Near nodded and walked out of the room to find his dorm. He walked down the hallways until he finally saw his room. Near placed the key in the slot and opened the heavy wooden door. The room was large; although it only held essentials it was still much more than Near had been used to.
"Matt, turn down your damn video game!" Near heard someone shout and a door slam down the hall. Near, clutching tightly to his white bear head opened the door. He poked his head out into the hallway, looking across it his eyes widened as his eyes fixed upon Mello. It seemed almost like fate that Mello would turn around to face him. Mello's eyes widened as his eyes focused on Near's, after a moment of gaping Mello turned his open mouth into a horrifying smirk.
"So you're in this dorm," Mello said walking over placing his hand on the door, causing the door to be wide open. All Near did was stare up at Mello with large eyes before nodding once.
"You should really answer people when they talk to you," Mello snapped.
"…" Near stood in front of the door quietly, he didn't know what he was supposed to say. Near may have been a genius, but his people skills were very poor.
"Say something!" Mello cried out angrily.
"Can I bring toys into my room?" Near asked quickly, not wanting to upset the boy anymore than he was. The question was actually genuine because Near wanted to know if he bring puzzles and other items into his room. So he could have time to himself since he didn't like talking to other people or in the same room.
"What?" Mello said taken back a little at the random question, since he expected a terrified noise, followed by the boy crying.
"I do not wish to repeat myself, if you cannot give me the answer I wish to know please leave quickly," Near said as politely as possible, looking up at Mello with his large innocent eyes. Near was trying to make Mello lose his cool, as he did in the playroom.
Mello started to shake as he clenched his fists tightly together, trying to stop himself from doing anything violent; as if he knew what Near was trying to cause. After a moment of self-control Mello looked down at Near and smiled. "Yes, you can bring some toys into your room."
"Thank-you very much," Near said, holding no thankfulness whatsoever.
"Ya, sure," Mello said before adding, "Wait here I have to get something."
Mello ran down to his room quickly, some yelling was heard behind the closed door before Mello returned looking triumphant. Mello reached out to hold Near's hands open, before he placed the polar bears mutilated body in Near's hands, smirking his evil smile.
"Thank-you for giving my bear back," Near said, hiding his tears inside. Mello swore under his breath as Near closed the door in his face.
Near walked over to his bed holding onto his destroyed bear, he laid down onto the bed feeling the crisp bed sheets fluff up around him. Near gazed up at the white ceiling, letting random percentages run through his head, trying to eliminate the boredom; Near kept this going for at least an hour, until he finally stood up placing the bear on his bed.
The only thoughts that ran through Near's head was about Mello; why did he hate him? It didn't seem as though he was upset at Near until Rodger had mentioned his intelligence compared to Mello's. Although Mello could have hated Near even before that, and was just being a nice person while Rodger had been in the room. Near shook his head clear; if Mello hated him he would do his best to hate the boy he had liked right away.
Near opened to the door when he had finally reached the playroom, Near walked over to the corner where he originally viewed the puzzles. The room was quiet, since no kids occupied the room; Near believed they must have been at their classes.
Near sat on the ground, he was about to place his hands to his chest but stopped suddenly when he didn't feel his polar bear anymore. Near glanced up once, thinking about what he could put to his chest. The thought suddenly came to him as he placed his one knee against his chest; it seemed to work as a good replacement for his precious bear.
Near started to separate the puzzles, choosing the ones he wanted to take with him. Most of the puzzles would not be a challenge, they seemed to be around 300-500 pieces. He only found a couple puzzles that were over 1000, although he still knew they would be remotely easy. Never the less Near started to carry them to his room, they were piled on top of his open arms, like a freshman carrying a bunch of books on their first day.
Near walked down the hallway a little wobbly, sometimes being short and small did not help the situation. Near couldn't look above his piled up puzzles, which only caused the inevitable to happen—Near bumped into Mello, who just happened to skip class that day.
"Hey, watch were the hell your going—" Mello said before stopping abruptly noticing who he was yelling at.
"Hello Mello, are you not supposed to be in class?" Near said, picking up the puzzle pieces and throwing them into random boxes.
"So what, I don't care," Mello stated defensively.
"…" Near didn't answer after he finished grabbing his puzzles, he slowly got up holding out the puzzles atop one another he started to walk away, "Good bye."
Mello didn't say anything back, he just watched Near walk away. Mello hated Near, although he had no idea why, he had wanted to make fun of the boy even before he had found out that he had scored higher on the mandatory exam. Mello wanted to hurt the small albino boy, and yet at the same time he wanted to hug the boy and make everything all right. Mello shook his head, frowning at those thoughts, him be nice? It was positively absurd, something that would ruin his reputation. Mello walked down the hallway to see Matt.
Near opened his door with some difficulty, once he was inside he emptied all the puzzle pieces together, with all the puzzle pieces together it should be more challenging than an ordinary puzzle, Near hoped that putting the puzzle together would keep his mind busy until he could fall asleep.
Near awoke abruptly to someone pounding on his door, he quickly stood up not noticing the puzzle pieces that were stuck to the bottom of his feet. He walked over to the door blinking at the light that filled the room.
"It's time for class," Mello said before running down the hall way looking a little uncomfortable, maybe even embarrassed.
Near rubbed his tired wide eyes, they looked wide and extremely young, since most of the time his eyes looked as if he had seen too much in his small life. Near didn't bother getting changed, since he had no idea if he had any clothes in his drawers. Most likely he did, but he was to lazy to go back into his room to change; he had no 'fashion sense' so it didn't matter anyways.
Near walked down the hall finding his class room; it was quiet except for the teacher's voice filling the room, teaching the few students that were there. Near knocked on the door quietly, wondering if he should have knocked harder. Near didn't have to wait long, even though his knock was not loud enough to hear one of the students glanced at the door way and said, "Someone's at the doorway."
"Yes, may I help you?" the teacher asked politely her blond hair spinning as she turned quickly to see who it was.
"Hello, Mrs…?"
"Mrs. Halden," she said.
"Mrs. Halden, I was told I am to start class today."
"You must be Near, if you would please take a seat there" Mrs. Halden said pointing toward an empty seat before turning toward the class, "If everyone would please settle down, we shall continue with our class."
Near made his way toward the back of the class, sitting down when he had finally reached his seat. His seat was a couple rows in front him; a little to the left, the light shining on Mello's hair. Mello was staring out the window looking particularly bored. Near continued to stare at Mello until he seemed to sense it and turned to glare at Near. Near glanced the other way, focusing his attention on the teacher who was going to over the theory of bombs and how they were created. This school was not what Near had expected at all, he had known it would be strange since it was a school that had a different view on teaching. What he hadn't expected was that they were going to learn how to create bombs.
Near felt his eyes drift off from the teacher towards Mello again. He seemed almost angelic the way the sunlight played off his hair causing a strange and unnatural glow surrounding his face. Mello's eyes were closed; his mouth was a little agape, and his breathing slow.
"Near, could you please answer what was the largest bomb to go off during the Vietnam War?" Mrs. Halden asked when she noticed Near was not paying attention.
"The largest bomb that was used in the War was called, the BLU-82, it weighed 15,000 pounds. It was used by the U.S. air force to clear helicopter landing zones," Near said after he thought of his father's book about the Vietnam War.
"Excellent," Mrs. Halden said a bit taken back at Near's answer.
Near focused on listening to the teacher talk about the war, it was quite boring since he remembered most of the facts from his father's book. The day seemed to go by quickly, the teacher dismissed everyone.
Near walked out of the room right after Mello, watching him walk down the opposite way he was supposed to go to take his exam; the exam which he hadn't the slightest idea of what it was for. What would happen if he did something wrong? Would they send him away like his parents had? Near shook his head at the thoughts, there was no point in worrying about things that didn't matter. Near knocked on the doors to the exam room; louder than he had when he had gone to his class.
"Come in," He heard a man say.
Near walked into the room shutting the door behind him, he looked around the room noticing a man standing at the front; his back was curved, his hands were deep in his pocket. As Near walked closer to the man he noticed his messy black hair; all these things interested Near but the thing he noticed the most was his eyes, they looked like two black holes that could see straight into your soul and sense who you were, as if he knew you better than you knew yourself.
"Hello, I am Near," He said once he was standing in front of this strange man in jeans.
"Yes I presumed so," the man said looking straight at Near, taking his thumb in his mouth and biting it.
"Is my exam oral?" Near asked, holding his hands against his chest tightly.
"No, your test if you will notice is the third seat from the back," The man said.
"…" Near looked at the man, it seemed as though he was testing him and grading him right were he stood. "I'm sorry but I need to speak with someone I know before taking this test incase—"
"It is not the right test," the man said, "You don't trust anyone?"
"Not at this moment, sir," Near said staring back at the man, twisting his hand in his hair from habit.
"Interesting," he said, "Then I shall call Watari."
"Thank you," Near said, as the man took out a small box with a button on it, he clicked it quickly. A few moments Watari walked into the room, and a quick discussion later, Watari was taking the small white haired boy up to the desk and looked over the test before saying it was the right one.
Near sat up on the chair with his knee planted tightly to his chest, after he was remotely comfortable, he started to write the test. The test was about 40 pages long, most based on knowledgeable facts, starting from easy questions to harder ones. Once Near was on the 12 page the man with the large all seeing eyes sat beside him, looking over his answers. The man sat in a funny position, not as though Near could say anything about it since he himself was in a strange way.
It didn't bother Near that the man was looking over his work, nothing could really bother Near; or maybe was just to naïve and young then, it's one thing to experience it; love, death, anger, loss. Near answered the questions easily enough, until he reached the last page, it had one question on it. It said 'What is Justice?"
What an odd question, all the other questions were about knowledge, this one was an opinion, it didn't make all that much sense to Near. What was justice to him? Justice was the way the world worked, without it humans would fall into ciaos, it would perish and burn. Justice was what tore families' apart, caused people all over the world to shed tears. It caused people to even kill, whether it was themselves or other people.
Near looked down at the sheet, thinking of a whole essay to write about it, yet all he found himself doing was writing to measly words that any child could do: 'Justice is.' Near underlined it once, than looked up at the man who stared at him saying,
"I'm finished."
"You can go back to your room," the man smiled an odd little smile that made it seem as if he had almost forgotten how.
Near nodded walking past the desks to the door, he headed back to his room passing Mello's on the way. He wondered why he had this strange fascination with the boy, this strange need to be with him. Near shook his head as he walked off to finish the two puzzles he had left, if they still had their pieces.
Near awoke to the soft chirping of birds, their singsong voices not welcomed so early in the morning. Near yawned getting out of bed, he glanced at his mutilated bear for a moment, before walking down to the playroom. Opening the heavy doors he saw the man he had met yesterday, his eyes just the same. He looked up at Near as he entered the room.
"I didn't realize anyone would be in here," Near said looking up at the man.
"I thought you might come here Near," the man said, "To be truthfully honest, I was hoping you would."
"…" Near looked at him hiding his emotions, yet feeling that it was useless since, he believed, the eyes staring at him could see deep into his soul.
"Let me explain," The man said, "To start off I guess I will reveal that L wants you to become a candidate for his successor, will you except?"
"What does it require of me?"
"If you become his successor, you will be given the title L, the greatest detective in the world, including his other aliases." The man said, "Also you would be helping to bring about justice."
"Than yes I shall become a candidate," Near said after a moment, "Are you L?"
"So you do have logic as well as intelligence, that is a good thing," the man said, "to answer your question, yes I am L."
"Am I to know who else is a candidate?"
"Mello and you are the only ones."
"I see," Near said.
Near and L talked more that morning sharing their views on things until Near finally felt his eyes close against his will. When he awoke later on that day he was in his own bed so he assumed L had taken him back to his room.
The years that went by at Wammy's went natural, Near always had a strange attraction to Mello, and Mello knew he wanted to be around the albino and hated it, so every chance he got he made Near's life miserable. Near kept growing less and less talkative, and grew emotionless, until he finally held no emotion altogether.
Near was sitting on his floor playing with a train and a few robots, although he was now older he didn't look any older than 10 years old. Although he would never admit it, there was only one thing in the world that frightened him, thunderstorms; he could handle lightning fine, it was the noise he hated. It made him hide in a corner and shiver.
When he was younger he handled these horrifying nights was to hold onto his polar bear, which thanks to Mello, it was too mutilated to repair. Near no longer had anything to hold onto instead he quivered putting his hands over his ears, as the thunder went across the land, causing everything to grow silent.
Mello, after finding out that he was in the running for the next L, had grown wicked than he had been before. Doing anything to get a reaction from Near; stealing and destroying his things, yelling and calling him names. Anything he could think of, Mello had done to try and get him riled up.
Near put his hands over his ears as more thunder cascaded through the sky. He shivered his eyes glowing from unshed tears; it made him look strangely angelic. A dark angel that loved to taunt people with its emotionless gaze, and polite remarks, that caused Mello to go blind with rage.
Near would have stayed the night with L, but sadly he was gone down to fight against the killer known throughout Japan, and the world, as Kira. A killer who had powers unbeknownst to the world of today, he was able to kill by heart attack. Near shook his head before his eyes widened at the thunder.
As the thunder went through the room, Near ran out of the room, grabbing his pillow, as fast as his frightened legs would carry him. He stood outside the door clutching his pillow to his chest tightly; thunder was the one thing that caused him to lose to his emotions.
Near coward in the hallway for a moment before doing the only logical thing his brain could think of. Near knocked on Mello's door, he heard a groan and loud thump heard followed by swearing. The door opened, Mello stood there staring down at the small cowering Near, he seemed dumbstruck that Near was showing emotion.
"What the hell do you want N-?" Mello said being cut off as the thunder cut through the sound waves. Near reached out and grabbed Mello's waist.
"I-I…I am scared," Near said trying to find the right words as the fear went through his body.
"Than go find someone else," Mello said, sounding like he was losing his resolve.
"I can't," Near said, looking up at Mello, his huge eyes gazing up at Mello.
"I…shit," Mello said, "fine, you can stay here."
"Thank you," Near whispered following Mello into the room.
Mello walked over to his bed, getting under the blanket; Near watched Mello get into bed, standing in front of Mello awkwardly.
"If you're going to get in, get in!" Mello glared, lifting up the blankets, Near looked at Mello before getting under the blankets. Although Near hadn't said it, or even thought about, he had always known that he loved Mello. That the admiration he held for him was more than what it appeared to be.
As Near cuddled up to Mello, Mello stiffened, and Near thought of the conversation he had with L before he had left.
"L, how do you know if you love someone?" Near asked, setting his half finished puzzle aside for a moment.
"I believe love is when you would want to be with the person forever, no matter what there faults," L said after a moment of biting his nails and looking up at the ceiling, seeming to count the tiles.
"What is it to you though?" Near asked, not satisfied with the answer L gave.
"Well…I think it is when you meet someone who you believe is at the same level as you," L gazed at him, seeming to do some pointless calculations in his had before saying, "Why did you want to know?"
"The truth is that I wanted to know if you have ever been in love," Near said going back to his puzzle.
"I have never been in love, and in truth I don't ever want to," L said, continuing after he say Near's questioning eyes, "falling in love is the alkalize heal of a human being, we can't help it."
Near looked up at L wondering what he meant before placing it to the back of his head, saving it for another day.
Near had saved the conversation for that day, as he realized as he climbed into Mello's bed that he knew why love was an alkalize heal. Near now knew as he reached over and placed Mello's arm over his small body. Mello made no protests; although he may have been asleep, Near wasn't sure.
Near only showed emotion to Mello, if anyone was his weakness it would be him. Even now he had risked humiliation to see Mello. Near hated to admit it he knew he loved Mello. The strange thing was why did he, the only thing they held in common above all things was their intellect, and even that was not the same. Near's intellect was calm and thoughtful while Mello's was impulsive and angry. Near borrowed closer to Mello as the noise cascaded throughout the room; he felt comfortable and completely safe as he fell into a light slumber.
Near awoke to someone moving beside him, opening his eyes he glanced at Mello. Never in Mello's entire life had he wanted to swear so much, he was in bed with the man he had just found out he loved. Near quickly jumped out of the bed as if something had burned him; feeling uncomfortable being in Mello's bed.
"Thank you for letting me stay the night here, I hate thunder," Near said calmly before walking out of the room quickly.
When Near was in the safety of his own room, he sunk to floor. A million questions were traveling through his mind; faster than he could answer. He almost wished that Mello would feel the same way he felt about him. At the same time Near knew he would never want it because it would be his downfall; it was shown through history time and time again. An example of it would be in Greek Mythology with the hero name Heracles, of course the Disney version had watered down the storyline, giving Heracles the new name: Hercules. The original storyline had contained a man whose strength matched no humans, he had been seduced into telling his secrete. In the middle of the night the women had hacked off his long hair, which had been the source of his strength; incidentally he died a tragic death. All because of love.
If Near was to let himself go, and ignore everything around him; would he turn out like Heracles? Near knew that Mello would do anything to become L's successor, not to mention Near had seen Mello when he was angry. He was so bent on beating Near that he didn't have a fully functioning mind; the only thing he knew was how to let his feelings get the best of him.
Near was snapped out of his train of thought when he heard a knocking someone knocking, his heart seemed to speed up at the thought of it being Mello. Slowly he reached up to the door turning the handle, when he opened the door he felt embarrassed, though he didn't show it, for wishing it was Mello. The man at the door was Rodger; he was looking depressed for some reason.
"Near you have to come to my office, Mello is there too," Rodger said before walking off quickly.
Near's eyes widened as his thoughts traveled to him being with Mello that night, did Rodger think something more had happened than just sleeping? Near widened his eyes, feeling his face flush a light shade of pink at the thought of doing anything with Mello; who cared if they were both underage.
Near shook his head noticing were his thoughts had flooded, quickly he walked out of the room leaving his puzzles sprawled everywhere; he hadn't changed much over the years. Although he did grab one puzzle that he had almost finished, it was pure white except for the letter in the top right corner that showed so clearly, it was almost like a beckon of light that shown upon the darkness. Near walked to Rodger's office, he knocked once awkwardly before walking in.
Once Near was settled onto the carpet he dumped out the puzzle, and started putting it together once again to help sooth his mind for what was to come. He didn't want his emotions to leak out.
"What is it, Rodger?" Mello asked standing beside Near, causing them to look like the opposites they were. Near looked like a fallen angel kneeling to a god, his wings taken away in the most desperate time of need. Mello on the other hand, looked like a demon his wings already long gone.
"L is dead," Rodger said after a moment holding his hands interlocked in front of his mouth as if he couldn't quite believe it himself.
"Dead, w-why?" Mello yelled placing both hands on Rodger's desk.
"…" Rodger said nothing, letting Mello come to his own conclusion. Near sat still letting all his emotion disappear inside himself as he finished the puzzle; he put the final piece in looking at the L it formed.
"Y…you mean he was Kira? Is that it?" Mello screamed his eyes almost as wide as Near's.
"Most likely," Rodger said closing his eyes in distress.
"He promised he would see Kira dead! L was killed?" Mello said grabbing onto Rodger's sweater growing desperate. "Are you sure?"
"If you can't beat the game, if you can't solve the puzzle your nothing but a loser," Near said dumping out his puzzle onto the floor again. Near had felt the situation going out of control and had decided to do something. Mello stopped he seemed to have forgotten he was there.
"So than which of us did L…"
"Neither of you yet, he can't choose now that he's dead…" Rodger said, than after a moment added, "Mello…Near…How about you two work together?"
"Yeah, sounds good," Near said he would have liked to work with Mello, someone he admired, cared for…loved. Although he knew Mello would never say yes to such a horrendous situation he believed it would be.
"That's impossible, Rodger…you know near and I don't get along…we're always competing."
"…" Near said nothing but listened intently, he had never heard Mello's side of their one sided competition. Sadly Mello didn't say anything further about it instead he said,
"It's fine Rodger, Near can be L's successor," Mello seemed oddly calm at the moment, Near knew that it would be a bad thing if he was calm. "Unlike me he will calmly and rationally solve the puzzle. I'm leaving the orphanage too."
"Mello," Rodger said standing up holding his hand out.
"I'm almost 15 anyway, Rodger," Mello said walking out the door, "I'll live life my own way."
Near stared at his puzzle for a moment, he finished it before he stood up saying good bye to Rodger. Mello was going to leave? Would this mean he would be gone for ever, and he would never see him again? Near could not accept this, he had just realized that he loved Mello. Near reached his door, when he reached for the handle he paused. If he was never going to see Mello again he might as well go see him one last time.
Near knocked on Mello's door, hearing no answer he feared for the worse as he opened the door. To his amassment Mello was still in the room packing up clothes.
"Hello Mello," Near said feeling a little awkward.
"What the fuck do you want Near?" Mello said as he stuffed another shirt into his bag. Near could see the chocolate bars shoved in bottom.
"I just wanted to tell you I l—" Near started to say.
"Why don't you just leave me alone, I really want to be alone," Mello said sadly looking down at his feet.
"I-I…don't go," Near said grabbing onto Mello's sleeve.
"W-what the hell Near?" Mello said his eyes wide as Near did something out of character once again.
"Don't go," Near repeated holding onto Mello's sleeve for dear life.
'Why should I stay?" Mello asked, looking down at Near.
"I-I love you," Near looked up into Mello's, getting ready for Mello to explode in an angry ball.
"What the fuck," Mello said, "What kind of plot are you planning now?"
"Nothing, I'm not planning anything!" Near exclaimed, trying to keep his emotions under control. He had expected Mello to hit him, not say he was lieing.
"Why would you do this now?" Mello said, "The one fucken' thing I can't handle."
"I do love you," Near said reaching up to touch Mello's face.
Mello seemed to loose control, taking Near's hand he pulled Near to him. Their lips crashed together in a blind lust. Near gasped as Mello placed his hand upon his thigh, pulling Near even closer than they already were.
"I hate what you do to me Near," Mello said after they had parted.
"Do you love me?" Near questioned, stiffening as he waited patiently for a answer.
"I do, I think it started the day when we first met," Mello said staring down at the small and fragile albino.
Near almost smiled at the answer Mello gave him, although he hid it by reaching up and kissing Mello, the kiss they shared this time was gentle, as if they didn't want the dream to end. Mello slid his hands under Near's shirt, feeling the heated white skin. Near moaned softly as he ghosted over his nipple, Mello took full advantage of Near's opened mouth as he slid his tongue into it.
Near felt his mind cloud over as Mello moved down to Mello's neck, biting the pale open flesh. Near clutched onto Mello's shirt, his knees starting to shake as the pleasure racked through his body. Mello, after ravishing Near's neck for a moment went back to his mouth.
Near opened his mouth as Mello kissed him, but Mello decided to tease Near, leaving the kisses dry; every so often he would lick Near's bottom lip. Near felt himself loose control, as he grabbed a hold of Mello's neck and put his tongue inside. Both boys fought for control over the situation; Mello won.
Near didn't know when it had happened but Mello had maneuvered them over to the bed. Near felt the back of the bed hit against the back of his legs. The bed sheets pooled around him as he landed on them, Mello looked at Near for a moment, taking in his pale untouched skin, his unnatural innocent looking eyes that held all the mischief in the world. Mello also took in the way Near looked sprawled out on a bed, his cheeks slightly pink, his breathing heavy. Near was a beauty to behold.
Mello got onto the bed, it squeaked as the added weight sunk onto the bed. Mello laid beside the boy, lest he crush him. They both laid there kissing, touching. If Near knew he could have felt this way a long time ago he would have forsaken all he knew for the sweet taste of it; he had never expected anything to happen between Mello and him.
Near suddenly felt the need to feel skin on skin, he sat up, pulling Mello with him. Near, with shaking hands, reached out to Mello's shirt and pulled it over his head letting his knuckles drag over the toned skin. Near suddenly felt very feminine as he traced over Mello's stomach with his tongue. Mello moaned and squirmed under him.
"I love you," Near said looking up at Mello before licking his nipple.
"Ah!" Mello moaned, it seemed this was his weak point, "I-I…ah, love you t-too."
Near continued his menstruations feeling Mello harden under him, he started to blush. Although as soon as he felt Mello become aroused by him caused Near to realize what he wanted. Near had no idea what that entitled, of course he knew how a women and a man had intercourse, but with two men it wasn't quite possible, was it?
Mello grabbed onto Near's head kissing him quickly before lifting his shirt off. Mello, after he had kissed Near, switched their positions, Mello was now on top. He licked down Nears smooth chest, reaching with one hand he tweak his nipple.
"Ah…ah," Near moaned out having a hard time keeping his emotion in check.
Once Mello had licked down to Near's waist band he dipped his tongue into the navel, causing Near to shake in anticipation at the suggestive hints. Mello slid Near's pajama bottoms off, Near was only wearing his boxers, since he had forgotten to wear his socks. Mello reached down putting his hand underneath the thin fabric giving it a experimental stroke. Neither Near nor Mello would have ever guessed that Near could make such a noise, it seemed to grow quiet except for Nears pants. Mello stared wide eyed at Near before stroking him again, the same noise filled the room.
"You really are sensitive," Mello said chuckling, he stroked Near again. Near felt a sweat break over his body as Mello stroked him teasingly.
"S-stop teasing me," Near said trying to steady his breath.
"I just love to hear you scream, how bout' my name next time?" Mello said looking deep into Near's.
"Mello!" He screamed as Mello stroked him once more.
"Much better," Mello said kissing Near, their breaths mingling.
Near reached down Mello's chest which hovered above him, when he reached the hem pf then he pulled down the zipper, hearing Mello gasp as he went a little to close to his groin. Near than pulled down the pants part way, Mello kicked it off the rest of the way.
"Are you sure you want this?" Mello asked, suddenly growing very serious.
Near nodded reaching up with one hand to touch Mello's face, Mello took a hold of it looking at Near before he started to lick Near's fingers, Near felt his face flush at the suggestiveness of it, feeling the menstruations travel straight to his groin.
Mello pushed Near's boxers down, once they were down Mello went onto his knees to get a better look at Near. Near probed himself on his elbows blushing as he felt Mello's eyes trace over Near. Mello looked at Near his eyes filled with lust and love, he traced his hips than back up Nears chest.
"Now you," Near said reaching for Mello's boxers, Mello made no protests as Near pulled them down loving the way Mello squirmed as Near rubbed his hands beside his arousal. As Near looked upon Mello he felt heat that had started to build up in the center of his being travel to his entire body. He felt very warm as Mello's head traveled down to his groin, right before Mello put his arousal in his mouth he felt a slight sting in his anal. It was quickly put out of his mind as Mello started to lick Near's arousal.
"Ah …Ah!" Near cried out, feeling out of control.
Near felt his breath come back to him as Mello let go. Near looked up to see Mello ready himself at his anal, and he finally knew how to 'do it'.
"If you want me to stop at anytime tell me, this may hurt," Mello said out of breath as he started to enter.
Near clenched his eyes shut, the pain was unimaginable but he decided to try his best to ignore it. Near, after a moment or two started to get used to the feeling.
"Can I move now?" Mello asked, starting to move after Near nodded his head.
Near started to feel the pleasurable part in it as Mello started move faster; both of them turning their instincts over to the pure pleasure. Near started to see stars as Mello switched the angle. Both boys cried out as they felt each other climax, there semen sparing artistically among their chests.
"I love you," Mello said kissing Mello on the cheek, as he fell exhausted beside Near.
"I love you too," Near said cuddle-ling Mello, Mello opened his arm invitingly. They both fell exhausted into a deep slumber.
Near awoke to the soft sunlight streaming in through the open curtains. Near felt strangely content, giddy even, as he realized what had happened. Near couldn't believe Mello loved him back, it almost seemed like a fairytale without the poisoned apple. Near felt refreshed although it seemed quite impossible for that to happen.
Near held his arms above his head, stretching; before turning to look at Mello, Near opened his eyes wider than they normally were as he realized that Mello was missing. The only thing Near saw was a blank letter propped up on it. Near quickly opened it, when he sat he up he cringed at the pain that traveled up his back, Near immediately ignored it and read the letter.
Near,
I love you, I hope you did, and still believe me when I say that. Even though I love you, I can't be with you, we're rivals; born opposites. I left while you were sleeping, I was going to wake you but when I was leaning over you getting ready to say goodbye I looked at your face. In that moment I knew that I couldn't leave if you asked me to stay once again. I do hope we meet again, although I believe we are bound together. I love you, no matter what happens.
Mello
P.S. I left a present in you're room.
Near stared at the letter, rereading it before, getting up quickly scanning the ground for his crumpled pajamas. Once he spotted them he pulled them on quickly heading for his room to see what he had left him. Near clutched onto the letter tightly crumpling it, as he opened his door. On his bed was a small white box, Near opened the lid to find a puzzle and a note inside. Near opened the note quickly, it read:
Near,
I know how much you love puzzles, since you were never able to go a day without one. So here is a puzzle from me. It's pure white, just as you are. Only there is one piece missing, I will give it to you on the day we can finally be together. Until then, I love you.
Mello
Near never knew life could be so cruel, to take away his love before he had time to hold him properly. Near sunk to the floor, his eyes closed as he felt the tears start to cascade down his cheeks, after a moment of self-pity Near stood up wiping his angelic face. Mello would laugh at him if he ever saw him in such distress.
Near looked at his window looking off into the distance, it seemed that if he wanted to become stronger he would have to love Mello secretly, until they would be able to be together. Mello held the key to that though.
Near and Mello did see each other after that, yet their meetings were held in secrete. No one was to know about them they were never to be mad public. Mello would come once a week depending on when he could. Near always look forward to them, wondering if it was this time he would finally acquire the missing piece to his puzzle. Near always looked up with his questioning eyes, and every time Mello would look at Near and kiss him.
The last time they held each other it was different, Near knew something was wrong. He had been feeling sick to his stomach all day. He knew if he let Mello go he would never hold him again.
"Stay," Near said looking up.
"Near," Mello said turning away as he placed his shirt on, "I can't, you know that as well as I do."
"Please stay," Near repeated in a desperate attempt to hold onto smoke; or hold onto flowing water.
"Near," Mello said once before grabbing Near's hair and kissed him as if the world would end. Near almost started to cry as he realized that this could be the last kiss they would ever share.
"I love you Mello," Near said grabbing Mello's hand.
"I love you too," Mello said sadly, gently pulling his hand away, "and I'm sorry."
Mello quickly walked out of the room, not bothering to say anything else. That was the last time he saw Mello, at least alive that is. Near had never been able to forgive himself, although he had told the horrible creature name Kira that he did not believe Mello had given up his own life to save his, he knew it was true. Yet knowing this truth it only added to his guilt, until he really did have no emotions left.
"Near, you have mail," Rodger said as he walked into the room disturbing Near as his thoughts drifted to the know.
"Thank you Rodger," Near said dismissing him quietly, Near opened it quick enough know that it must be another case that he had to solve. When Near opened it though it was empty except for a puzzle piece. Near's eyes opened wide as he inspected it, it was plane white. The missing piece to his puzzle.
Was this Mello's way of telling him to go on with his life, to push forward no matter what it threw at him? Near didn't want to think about it yet his mind disobeyed him as he turned it over to look at the back. Inscribed upon the back of it was a single word 'love.' Near gasped silently, maybe this meant Mello still loved him and wished him to live. Mello would never want Near to waste the life Mello had given him.
Near placed the piece in the puzzle, he finally had his missing puzzle. Near for the first time in a very long time smiled, his puzzle was complete.
I hope everyone enjoyed this story. I only meant for this story to be about a 1000 words long but it ended up being around 9000. I guess when I get into something I really get into it. (Laugh) I hope everyone reviews, I would really appreciate it, and also to have your thoughts on how I wrote it. How I could make it better etc. I believe I need to fix my lemons, and make them longer. Well anyways thank you for reading this, and hopefully giving me feedback on this story!