Midnight Dawn

By

Abigail Hudson

Following the Twilight Series

Arguments

I sat at the Cullen's dining room table opposite Emmett, who was now putting all his strength into trying to defeat me at an arm wrestle, and thought back to the time when he would've beaten me flat out.

I had been frail and weak then, only human. I had been just about the most troublesome person on the earth with my clumsiness and uncanny ability to attract any signs of danger within the continental U.S. I felt much more dignified now that I could walk over a flat plane of ground without falling every other step.

Alice walked into the room; bringing me back to the present. I sighed in envy, even now as a vampire I could never perfectly imitate Alice's graceful walk. She seemed to dance on air wherever she went; it was something I'd always felt jealous of.

"What-" Alice chuckled to herself when she saw me and Emmett at the table. "Should I even ask?"

I effortlessly forced Emmett's hand to the table, to his dismay, and looked over at Alice to explain.

"Emmett thought he might be able to beat me now I'm older. It's been about a year since the change but he's still as weak as ever." I looked over at Emmett with a triumphant grin as he glowered at me in return.

"I'm not weak! I was just going easy on you." He protested, grinning at me before leaving the room.

I rolled my eyes and turned back to Alice, who seemed nervous about what she was going to say. This made me worry slightly as I waited in anticipation for her to speak.

"I know Edward's the only one who can kidnap you but I was wondering if I could maybe borrow you for a day…" She stopped when she saw my frown and bit her lip anxiously. I didn't know how to respond; she probably wanted a shopping partner and, although I wouldn't want to go, I knew that I couldn't make her go with Rosalie. I wasn't that evil.

"Why?" I asked sternly, which was nearly impossible to do now that Jasper had entered the room. I immediately felt more relaxed and calm and I could tell that Alice did too from her face.

"I was thinking maybe a trip up to Seattle. They have better shops than they do here and I need to update my wardrobe. Please come! It won't be half as much fun without you!" She pleaded desperately. I wanted to object, but Jasper sent a guilt wave at me and I sighed. I hated that Jasper could control me still, even as a vampire, but I couldn't even feel annoyed because he wouldn't let me.

"You do not need to update your wardrobe, Alice. We went down to Port Angeles last weekend and you got two new dresses then. Besides, I doubt that Charlie will want me going to Seattle after the 'Serial Killer' episode." I tried to object but Alice sensed the weakness in my voice and attacked immediately.

"It's been over a year since that! Plus I saw this adorable top in a shop window that I want. It wouldn't kill you, and you could bring Renesmee!"

I thought about it in my head, I still wasn't completely confident about having Renesmee near humans although she'd never attacked one.

"I'll go but we're not taking Renesmee. Okay?" She seemed to be glowing with victory, even though she'd probably known I'd say yes before she even asked.

I waited for her to dance out the room before turning on Jasper.

"That's not fair!" I complained. "You made me do that. Now I'm stuck shopping for a day." Jasper just smiled at me, much to my annoyance.

"It wouldn't kill you or anything and it'll make her happy. You should take Renesmee, she's more than ready to go and you know it. I think it'll do her good to be around people." I scowled at him but immediately felt my whole body relax as I did so.

"Stop it." I demanded. "Stop messing with my emotions. If I want to be annoyed then I should be left to do it in peace. And I'm definitely not taking Renesmee with us. It's too risky, what would happen if she happened to smell a particularly tasty human as we walked down a clothes isle? She would uncover all our secrets! Do you really want the Volturi to visit that badly?" I saw Jasper shudder at the thought of the Volturi and immediately felt guilty. His face had gone a shade paler than usual and he swallowed loudly.

"I suppose not." He muttered quietly, but I could easily hear him. He was no longer making eye-contact or controlling my emotions, and he looked positively ill.

"Sorry." I murmured before leaving the room to go and find Edward. I knew he would come if I called him but I needed to get away from Jasper. I felt guilty for bringing up the Volturi and also awkward now that I had.

I passed Esme on the staircase. She seemed happy enough and beamed at me as I approached.

"Bella!" She exclaimed. "Are you looking for Edward?" It was impossible not to smile when I looked at Esme. She made everyone around her happy by just being there.

"Yes, actually. Do you know where I can find him?" I asked, knowing full well that she did.

"Of course! He's with Renesmee in his old room. He was reading her Shakespeare but she got bored and started reading it to him!" She laughed gleefully. "She's so clever! And so grown-up now! Is Carlisle hunting?" I knew the answer; Edward had told me earlier when I asked for him. I gave Esme the same answer Edward had given me.

"Yes, but he's nearby if you need him. He's hunting elk today, near the boundary I think." She thanked me graciously and scurried away.

When I reached Edward's room, I just stood in the doorway and watched him listen to Renesmee. He knew I was there; he'd heard me ask Esme where he was.

I studied Nessie and tried to estimate what her physical age would be now. I guessed about seven or eight, she should stop growing soon, then maybe she'd be able to wear the same pair of trousers for more than a week.

"Excuse me," Edward said to Renesmee. "I need to talk to Mummy, okay?"

"Okay, do you want me to wait for you or shall I carry on reading?" I smiled at Renesmee in awe. She was truly adorable and the most beautiful child on the planet. Her wide eyes turned towards me and she smiled a toothy grin.

Edward replied to her, whilst never taking his eyes off me.

"I might be a little while talking with Mummy so get ready for bed then we can read it together again." She nodded and slid out of her bed and walked to the bathroom. Edward took an unnecessary breath before walking to meet me in the doorway.

The accusing look never left his eyes as he watched me.

"Bella, you upset Jasper." His voice was an angry whisper. I looked at the ground and studied the microscopic cracks in the laminate flooring when I replied.

"Yes, sorry." I mumbled without looking up. Edward seemed to hesitate before deciding to carry on.

"Why did you bring up the Volturi? He didn't do anything wrong." I began to feel a little bit queasy. I thought of what I would answer if I could bring myself to speak again. If my heart could still beat then it would be going into overdrive about now, and I was grateful that it couldn't beat anymore so at least Edward wouldn't have that giveaway.

"I don't know." My voice was barely a whisper and I felt like my eyes were permanently glued to the floor. "I didn't mean to… I didn't want him to… I just really wanted…" I stood in awkward silence, facing Edward, but never moving my eyes off the ground.

"I think that you should apologise to Jasper; he was quite upset about it, and I think you should take Nessie to Seattle with you and Alice."

I gasped at the last sentence and couldn't help but look at his face.

"She's not ready! She only a year old!" I objected profoundly, but he stopped me by holding up his hand.

"She's nearly eight! You can't possibly think that Nessie is one physically or emotionally! You're only counting in actual years, and time really isn't that important to vampires in general."

"She's not a vampire, though! She's at least half human! She's not ready, she doesn't have enough restraint." I argued furiously, not bothering to try and keep my voice down. I didn't see the point anymore; the others could hear us anyway.

"She has more restraint than any of us had when we went back into civilization!"

I knew he was right but I felt really over-protective of Renesmee. She was my only child and knowing that she was the only child I would ever have worried me slightly. I didn't want her to be in any danger at all and I suddenly saw that she wouldn't be if she went to Seattle. She would be the safest child in the city with me and Alice there to protect her. I realised that she would be going with us and that was why Alice hadn't known if I would say yes.

"Okay, I'll ask her if she wants to come. Sorry about Jasper, I was really horrible. I'll apologise to him."

He kissed me lightly on the lips in appreciation, I felt like I was flying because I was on such a high, but he pulled away much too soon for my liking. I looked up into his golden eyes and stuck my bottom lip out in a useless attempt to look like I was annoyed. He laughed, his face stretching into my favourite smile, and hugged me tightly.

He seemed to inhale as he rested his chin on the top of my head. I didn't care, and I was past noticing. I just closed my eyes and leaned my head on his chest, half expecting to hear the thud thud thud of his beating heart. I smiled slightly, knowing that his heart would never beat for me to hear it.

There were loud footsteps coming from the bathroom towards us and I pulled away to face Renesmee, who was now grinning at us both and pretending to look at her watch.

Edward laughed and scooped her up in his arms easily. "You made your point! You cheeky little devil!" Nessie tossed and turned in his grasp, trying to wriggle free playfully. Of course she was unsuccessful. She laughed and gave in after a few seconds, knowing just how useless her attempt would be.

"You're very strong! I wish I could be as strong as you. I'd be like superman! Is mummy going to read with us?" She gazed up at me with her wide eyes and I gave up almost immediately, knowing that I would lose anytime Nessie asked me anything. She knew her eyes were my weakness and used that to her advantage.

"If you want me to, then I'll read." I sighed and followed Edward and Nessie into the room, aware of my easy defeat.

Alice had decorated the room so that it no longer consisted of Edwards huge stereo, the thousands of CD's he'd collected or the big leather couch that it used to have. Alice and Esme had hand painted the walls so that it made the room seem much larger and brighter.

Esme had painted a field of poppies, each one a unique shade of red. In the middle of the field there was a blue swing with a small seat. Renesmee was sat in the seat with a huge grin spread wide across her face as her locks blew in the breeze. Beside her, me and Edward held hands and smiled at our daughter in awe. You could almost see the love radiating from us. Further back in the field, there was a large group of people. Esme and Carlisle were in the centre of the group with Emmett and Rosalie to the left and Alice and Jasper to the right. I sighed; even in the painting Rosalie looked flawless. She was still the most beautiful thing in the world and I doubted that anyone could ever change that. Emmett had his arm round her shoulder and it was clear that he was stronger than the rest of them by the way his sleeveless shirt revealed his gigantic muscles. Esme's hair seemed silky even in the painting and Carlisle looked like the cleverest person you would ever meet. Alice seemed like a fairy without wings; she looked like she was flying across the field. Jasper seemed peaceful and I wouldn't be surprised if he was using his talent in the painting too.

On the other side of the room Alice had painted Charlie, Renée, Phil, Jacob and Zafrina. She had painted their faces, airbrushed and polished, so that they looked almost perfect. Renée and Phil looked down onto Renesmee's bed as if they were really watching her, but not creepily, just lovingly looking in adoration. Charlie, Jacob and Zafrina seemed to be in friendly conversation. Smiling at each other and peacefully chatting. Alice had painted the backdrop a sky blue and had even added clouds to make it seem like the sky.

Alice had helped Esme paint the last wall. They had painted humans and vampires and even added some werewolves. Everyone was in loving harmony in the painting and it was full of bright colours. Esme had painted the background first; with brilliant reds and yellows and just about every colour in between. The sun was setting to the left of the painting, the cause of all the colours in the sky.

Edward set Renesmee into her bed and tucked her in. I saw that the time was about nine thirty and Edward seemed to realise this too.

"Just one chapter, Nessie. Then it's time to go to sleep."

Renesmee flipped through the book and came to a chapter she had started. As she read I realised just how fluently spoke and how easily she read the words.

"Then was the time for words: no going then;
Eternity was in our lips and eyes,
Bliss in our brows' bent; none our parts so poor,

But was a race for heaven; they are so still…" Before she could continue she was asleep. Her breathing became heavier and her face seemed more peaceful.

Edward just watched her, deep in thought. I studied his face, the way his jaw curved around and the way his chin jutted out. His eyebrows shaped his golden eyes so that they seemed even more intimidating. His whole face showed perfect symmetry that anyone would be jealous of.

"She reminds me of you." His voice was barely a whisper. "When you used to sleep you looked more peaceful. She takes after you. She was talking in her sleep earlier." He stroked the side of her face so gently I would be surprised if she felt it.

"What did she say?" I asked out of curiosity. I moved my gaze from Edward to Renesmee. She reminded me more of him than myself. She had his jaw, his eyebrows and best of all, his lips.

"She said a lot of things; about all of us. She mentioned you and remembered all the times she fell asleep in your arms and all the times we read to her and told her stories. She called Jacob's name briefly but mostly she misses Zafrina." He never took his eyes off her as he reached out for her hand to listen to her dreams. I watched his face intently as he quickly and swiftly pulled away with guilt crossing his face briefly.

"What was she dreaming about?" I asked.

He seemed to realize that, if he wouldn't tell me, I could just as easily touch her hand and see into her dreams too because he made no hesitation in telling me.

"She wants to meet people her own age and go to school. She wants to be a normal kid, Bella." I couldn't help but look down as he glanced worriedly over at me.

"Oh," was all I said. I didn't know what else to say. Until she stopped growing she couldn't possibly go to a school.

"Well, we could take her out more. She barely goes anywhere but here and our house. She's lonely and she doesn't have to be." I could feel Edwards gaze on me; trying to predict my reaction.

"She can't go to school, obviously. I suppose it wouldn't do any harm to take her out more. How could I not see how lonely she is?" Edward glided over to me and put his arms around my waist. This made it very hard to concentrate properly on what I was trying to say.

"She isn't alone. She has all her family here." He whispered into my ear.

"Being alone and being lonely are different things completely." I argued. It was true, she had all her family here, but she had nobody her age to play with and talk to. She never had the chance to make any friends like normal people do. It seemed such an obvious thing for her to feel lonely, and I felt idiotic now that I had missed it before.

"It's okay," Edward reasoned. "You'll take her to Seattle with you and Alice and she'll be around other people. She'll be okay. Stop worrying." I smiled at him weakly and gazed into his eyes.

"Okay, I think I should tell Alice that Renesmee's coming." Edward nodded and released his grip on me.

"Remember to apologize to Jasper as well. I'll see you back at the cottage?" His last sentence was more of a question than a statement.

"Sure, if Jasper doesn't kill me first." He smiled at me in slight humor before jumping out the window into the darkness of the forest.

I sighed as I snuck a glace at Nessie and realized that Seattle wouldn't make a difference to whether she was lonely or not. She needed real friends but I couldn't think of a way in which she could make friends and not reveal our secrets.

I left the room, closing the door behind me, and made my way down the stairs to find Alice. Unfortunately, I ran into Jasper first. He seemed to stiffen and glanced away awkwardly. At first I did the same, but realized that I needed to apologize as soon as I could.

"Jasper, I'm really sorry for…" I began, but her cut me off with a wave of his hand.

"It's okay." He said, but he still couldn't look at me so I knew that I would have to continue until I was truly forgiven.

"It was mean to bring it up for no reason, and I didn't want to hurt your feelings. I was just a bit agitated but that wasn't your fault. You didn't deserve the way I treated you before." I watched his face smooth out and he seemed to loosen up slightly.

"Its okay, Bella. You didn't mean it. It just slipped out and I took it to heart when I shouldn't have." His warm smile told me I was forgiven and this made me feel slightly better. "I heard you were asking for Alice, she's on the computer." I smiled gratefully and scurried out of the room before he could tell how annoyed I was about him eavesdropping on my conversation.

When I found Alice she was on the computer, as Jasper had told me. I looked over her shoulder to see what she was doing but she closed the window before I could see.

"Hi, Bella!" She beamed at me and turned in my direction. "What were you looking at?" I asked curiously, eyeing Alice suspiciously.

"Oh, I was just playing games. Nothing interesting, but I hear Nessie is joining our trip." Damn it! So Alice had been listening to me as well. I wondered if all the Cullen's listened to me all the time, but told myself I was just being paranoid.

"Yeah, I thought she should get out a bit more and Edward suggested Seattle." Alice could hear the sadness in my voice, as I forced the words out, and looked at me sympathetically.

"It's not your fault she's lonely. It can't be helped." I sat down on the sofa and she joined me. She put her arm over my shoulder and I leaned on her, careful not to put my whole weight on her.

"I wish there was something I could do." I sighed.

Alice looked as though an idea was surfacing in her mind and she mulling it over and trying to figure it out. It was very frustrating; having to wait for her to speak. For a second I wished that I could have Edward's talent so that I could see what she was thinking.

"We could throw a party!" She exclaimed and I immediately groaned. She looked hurt at my automatic rejection so I tried to make amends.

"Sorry, reflex reaction. Although I don't see how a party would help her. We would only be able to invite the people who she already knows."

Alice didn't hesitate to argue for her party.

"She misses Zafrina. So we invite her, which would mean that Kachiri and Senna would want to come. We could invite Nahuel and Benjamin and Maggie! She liked Peter and Charlotte last time they came. Of course Amun, Kebi and Tia would want to come with Benjamin. Siobhan and Liam would bring Maggie, of course. From what I gathered last year Vladimir and Stefan adored Renesmee." I panicked; once Alice got started it was almost impossible to stop her.

"Hold on Alice! No, I don't want a huge party. She doesn't need one. She just needs some friends." I objected when I could interrupt her, but it seemed like she hadn't heard me.

"Of course Charlie and Jacob would come. I liked Seth as well. I suppose we should invite Leah to be polite, she did help us just as much as the other two. We wouldn't invite the European Nomads or the Denali coven; they don't like us much from what I can tell…"

"ALICE!" I yelled and she jumped. She seemed annoyed that I had interrupted her by yelling but I was just glad she had stopped. "No party, okay? Please?" I waited for her reply anxiously, hoping that she wouldn't be too offended by my yelling and that she would see sense.

"Yes, party. If I keep the guest list under twenty please can I throw Nessie a party?"

I sighed, under twenty people was a good offer from Alice considering how many people had attended the last party she'd thrown.

"Fine, under twenty, and people who know about Nessie and vampires only!" She frowned, calculating numbers.

"Okay, help me make the guest list. This time you can help organise the party with me!" I groaned but she had dragged me to her bedroom by time I had even opened my mouth to complain. She grabbed a pen and pad and joined me on her couch.

"So, Charlie and Jacob and Zafrina. Who else? Senna and Kachiri, that's five. Maggie, Siobhan and Liam, that's eight." Alice began scrawling names down on her pad in neat calligraphy.

"Benjamin, Tia, Kebi and Amun. That's twelve already. With Peter and Charlotte there's fourteen." I made sure that she realized the numbers before they got out of hand.

"How about Stefan and Vladimir? They'd want to come. If we invited Garrett, Mary and Randall, that would leave one more person. I want to invite Seth and Leah. It wouldn't be fair to invite one and not the other. Can't you live with one extra person?" She begged me, scanning over the guest list helplessly.

"Fine, but no more than that! Renesmee's childhood does not have to be a non-stop party." I grumbled in annoyance.

"Great!" Alice seemed over-enthusiastic and I could almost see her planning the party in her head. Knowing her there would be lots of balloons and music and dancing and lots of expensive lights and food.

"No more planning tonight, though. Are you going to let me go home?" I asked her, frowning.

"Sure. I want to do some more planning later though; so you better come straight over in the morning!" She yelled but she didn't need to; I could hear her perfectly well from where I was. I was nearly home now, it wasn't that far from the Cullen's family home but it would've taken so much longer had I been human.

I smiled to myself, enjoying my new ability and still happy, too oblivious as to what would be waiting for me when I returned home.