"Are you almost ready?" Minho called from the bathroom.
"Nearly there, hon!" I said, rushing to get ready. We had gotten invited to a fancy Christmas dinner with his entertainment company and I wanted to make sure I looked nice in front of his managers and the heads of the corporation. However, we had recently moved into a new apartment together, meaning that everything was scattered everywhere. It had taken me twice as long as it normally did to get ready, so we were going to be late if we didn't leave in the next few minutes.
I quickly put the back of my left earring on and slipped into the new heels which had been a moving-in present from my boyfriend. After a quick look in the mirror to make sure my makeup looked fine, I almost walked out of the bedroom before I realized I had yet to put on any perfume.
The various boxes that held our possessions were lined up on both sides of the bed. I located the one labeled "Bedroom-GLASS" and opened it, uncertain of which scent I would pick today. I wanted to apply something a little heavier; the evening was likely to drag out for several hours and it was vital to me that whatever I chose lasted the whole night.
As I was rifling through the sea of scarlet, purple, and gold containers, a solitary black box caught my attention. Confused at first, I quickly realized it must be one of Minho's colognes that had gotten mixed in with mine while we were packing things up. The silver logo on the outside didn't register, but Minho and I usually kept our bathroom essentials separate, so it didn't mean anything to me that I had no recognition. I opened the box and sprayed the inside of the lid, hoping to identify the scent.
As soon as the waves of cologne hit my nose, I felt a wave of fear and panic wash over me. The deep musky tone brought back memories I had tried to bury for the past year. I felt all of my senses overload at once….
The sting of his hand across my cheek.
Blood pooling in my mouth.
His voice assaulting my eardrums with swears, insults, and threats.
Vomiting from fear and self-loathing.
Bruises on my neck and arms that could not be easily explained away.
The flash of silver coming at my face.
The comfort of his arms around me, the promise that it would never happen again, his tears begging me not to tell anyone, that it was just a mistake, he just lost his temper, he was so so sorry….
It was as if the cologne had invaded my lungs; I couldn't breathe. The panic welled up in my chest and I gasped for air. My vision became cloudy, either from tears or nearly blacking out, I couldn't tell. I wanted to cry, to yell, but his grip on me was still too tight, I couldn't escape.
"_?" Minho called from the other room. I could barely make out his voice through the whirlwind I was in. One hand clutched my chest while the other reached out for his presence.
Next thing I knew, there was warmth surrounding me, enveloping me. "Sssshhhh, ssshhh it's okay _..." he said. I felt a hand on the back of my head, and my face found its way to the crook of his neck. The toxic smell of my ex was replaced with Minho's complicated and comforting scent.
Faint whiffs of grass from a soccer game.
The clean smell of freshly washed clothes.
Pomegranate shampoo that the two of us shared.
Deep cologne, strong and sensual at first, then gentle and inviting, just like Minho.
All sense of time was lost as I gasped and sobbed into Minho's shoulder. He didn't try to ask what was wrong, he just held me. His strong hands pulled me into his lap, one arm resting on my hip to support me, the other up against my back, allowing his fingers to gently stroke my hair. In between soft kisses to the top of my head, he was singing something, not one of his group's songs but probably an old lullaby he had learned when he was a child. The comforting gentle sensations calmed me down, finally allowing me to breathe properly and stop my tears.
"_, what happened? Are you hurt? Please tell me." He wiped the stray tears from my face and looked into my eyes with his deep and loving brown ones. "If you don't want to share I understand, but I want to help you through this."
I pointed at the black box lying next to us. "That cologne… It was his, I remembered it as soon as I caught the scent. I don't know how, but it was in my box of perfumes. Everything just came rushing back to me, and I had a panic attack… I'm so sorry Minho, I didn't mean to worry you."
Fire flashed in his eyes and he grabbed the box. Without a second thought, he crushed the box with his right hand. I flinched out of habit, and he gasped. "Sorry _. I didn't mean to scare you. I hope you know I would never do that to you. I don't understand how anyone could." He let go of the box and gingerly lifted my chin with two fingers so that my eyes could meet his again.
Minho gave me a quick peck on the nose, afraid that too much physical contact would scare me after my spell. I needed the reassurance though, so before he could turn away I pulled him into me. His lips were stiff at first, surprised by my brashness, but soon Minho relaxed and began to kiss me back. It was a relatively chaste kiss; he didn't ask for more than I was willing to give, and I only wanted reassurance that he was there.
The scar on my arm burned, but my heart shone brighter with my love for Minho in this moment as I let go of his supple lips. His forehead rested against mine and I felt his arms tighten around me slightly, as if he was afraid I would slip away again if he wasn't anchoring me. The hot breathe on my face matched the rhythm of his chest under my fingertips. Our hearts seemed to beat as one for a moment, and a sense of peace finally washed over me.
"You know, _, we don't have to go tonight. We can stay here if you'd rather." Minho pulled away to look me in the eye, worriedly placing a hand against my face.
"No, it's ok," I said. I was quite shaken by the triggering even, but having Minho around made me feel safe. As long as I was with him I would be okay. "Let me just touch up my makeup and we can go. I'm sorry for everything."
"No, no please don't be sorry," he said, helping me stand up. "None of this is your fault. You couldn't control your previous circumstances. But you have the chance to move on now, and I am here to help you through it, not matter what. I love you, _." My heart melted at the thought of how much he loved me, and how much I loved him.
"Besides," Minho said as gave me a quick peck on the lips. He picked up the bottle as subtly as he could and flashed me a cheesy smile. I couldn't help but grin back at him. "Stars are always supposed to be fashionably late!"