Okay, you guys wanted it, so you got it ^_~ The Essays of Daniel Thor!
^____^
If you've read my previous, still ongoing transformer fanfic "JetBlast" You would know what this is about, but in case you haven't read it, I shall let you in.
This takes place in the Armada time setting.
Demolisher, while stationed at the moon base felt like his life was incomplete, so decided to enrich himself with English college courses via the internet ^____^ wonderful thing the net, aint it?
Anywhoo- this story is all about some of the stuff that Demolisher had to write.......
Here I've posted the info about what happened in JetBlast that before this
**
"What are you doing?" Megatron couldn't believe the state of his troops. First victory dances, then expressive art courses, what would be next? Megatron slapped his forehead, for he already knew.
__
*flashback to a few days before, at Decepticon headquaters*
Cyclonus smiled. "Megatron, why didn't you let us finish them off. Me and Demolisher were perfectly capable of handling that mission!"
"Uh-hum." Demolisher cleared his throat. "Uh, Demolisher and I."
Cyclonus whipped around. "What's with all this grammatically correct stuff? Since when have you cared about proper English?"
"Since I've been taking online college course over the internet in that subject." Demolisher smiled.
"What?" Megatron turned his head and looked at his minion with a sideway look. "Why in the universe did you do that?"
"Well..." Demolisher shuffled his feet. "I figured that we'd be here for a long time, so thought I might as well do something useful and better my education. Truth be told, I've always wanted to write a war novel about the Cybertronian wars."
"Ugh..." Megatron slapped his face. "Why me?"
Demolisher scratched his head. "The only problem is that they think I'm a 'Daniel Thor' that lives at a secret military base, especially since all of my homework has been about battles and space."
"I think you should stop wasting your time and concentrate on getting the mini cons!" Megatron slammed his fist into his throne's arm.
"Uh, yes sir." Demolisher recoiled.
Megatron sighed.
*end flashback*
__
Megatron groaned. "Ah yes. We have the mini con, let's go!"
"Before you get anymore crazy earth ideas, what will be next? Rap singing and break dancing?" Megatron shuddered at that thought as he warped back to base.
**
okay, that was the part from "JetBlast" now begins this story....
**
The Essays of Daniel Thor
First installment: Registration
Demolisher clicked aimlessly through the earthlings Internet. It had been a new hobby for him since he had been stationed at the moon base. There was nothing much to do and boredom often forced the bots to resort to native techniques to battle their free time.
Demolisher sighed, seeing yet another flashing pop up ad. "I hate these things." He moved the thing that the humans called a mouse towards the small 'x' in the corner to close the ad when something caught his attention.
"Do you feel like your life is incomplete? Can't get any good jobs? Do you feel like pond scum that comes from a fish's posterior? Then do we have the thing for you! Become one of the many successful students of this highly esteemed program, College for Dummies!"
Demolisher sat, mesmerized by the ad. It seemed that it was calling him. Some more words popped up on the screen.
"That's right, for one ridiculously high price we'll pretend to be educated and qualified teachers while secretly scamming you out of your money! All while earning your degree in your choice of field! Click now or miss out on your one chance!"
Demolisher didn't waste a nano-second. He quickly clicked on the ad, the college's homepage popped up.
"Hmm. 'Are you a dummy? Are you scammed easily? Are you currently working at a dead end job with a low monthly income? Register now and get yourself trapped in loads of debt!' Sounds good to me." Demolisher clicked the large icon that said "Register now!"
"Hm. Okay..." A screen with a bunch of blanks popped up.
Name:
"That one's easy. 'Demolisher'." The gullible bot typed.
Address:
"The moon." He spelled carefully.
Current Occupation:
"Soldier."
Bank account number:
"Hm." Demolisher thought a moment. "What's a 'bank account number'? I guess I'll just make up a few random numbers." The bot hummed.
"9425678910"
Field of choice: (Please choose one)
Scamming
Ads
Psychology
"Hmm. That might be a good one, considering the state of my comrades, not to mention my commander....." Demolisher drummed his black fingers on his desk top before continuing to scroll down.
Technology
"I already know too much about that." The green robot rolled his optics. "I am technology! What else do you have?"
Nursing
Accounting
"My mother-borg always said that I was good with numbers...." Demolisher shook the idea off.
Teaching
Law enforcement
"I already do that! I want to do something new!"
English
Demolisher froze. "What is English?" He thought a moment. "Maybe this is destiny calling me! Yes, either I feel compelled to learn this foreign thing or my Energon recharge was bad!" Demolisher got up and did a hyper little dance around the room before settling back down into the chair and typed 'English' as his field of choice.
He clicked the button on the bottom. "Submit."
He sighed, settling back into his chair, his arms resting behind his head. "Now all I have to do is wait for a reply." He smiled. "This might be fun."
**
Dear Daniel Thor,
We are pleased that you have chosen our company to help you down your career path. We notice that you have chosen 'English' as your field of choice. For a small fee we shall be transferring you to an actual college of that specialty. Thank you for choosing us for helping you spend some of your money. You may follow the link to the college.
Thank you-
Dudeura Sucka Administrator of College for Dummies
**
Demolisher scratched his head as he read the email. "Ohkay....I guess I'll follow the link."
He clicked the link.
Another college's page popped up. A little smiling cat's head cartoon danced across the screen.
"Konnichiwa! Welcome to the esteemed university of English for Idiots! How may we help you further your education?"
"Uh...." Demolisher stared unbelievably at the screen. A dialogue box popped up on the computer monitor. He took it that he was to respond.
"I want to learn English."
The cat tilted its head. "As a language or as grammar?"
"I already know the language! I want to learn how to use it, so I'm guessing grammar."
"Oh kay dookay!" The cat twirled around and disappeared as an actual person's picture appeared on the screen.
"Welcome to administrations." The digitized picture smiled.
"This is just too weird." Demolisher lost his train of thought for a moment. "Wait a second, I can see you, can you see me?!" Demolisher stood up, knocking his chair down.
"What's going on in there?" Starscream's voice called through the door to Demolisher's quarters.
"Uh, nothing. I just tripped, is all." Demolisher righted the chair and began closing the screen on his computer.
"Whatever..." Starscream mumbled as he went on clunking down the hallway.
"Whew." Demolisher wiped his metallic brow. "That was a close one. Megatron would freak if he knew I was meddling in earthly things."
A knock on the door interrupted the bot's thoughts.
"Who is it?" He called out.
"Hey Demolisher, I want you to listen to this!" Cyclonus's voice whined.
The green bot within the room groaned as he slapped his head. "What now, Cyclonus?"
"I want you to listen to this rap song of mine..."
Fear gripped Demolisher. "Uh, no. Go away, I'm busy!"
"Sure, that's what they all say. What are you doing in there?" Cyclonus persisted.
"Nothing! Go away!"
"Fine!" The copter bot stomped his metal foot. "I'm sure somewhere out there in the universe appreciates my talent!"
"Feh," Demolisher rolled his eyes as soon as his crazy comrade was out of hearing range. "On a planet where the inhabitants have no ears!" He laughed as he turned his computer off...until tomorrow.
**
^___^ so....what'd you think? ^___^ I know, this isn't the best chapter, this is just the introductory. The real fun is about to begin ^___^ plz review! I am open to any suggestions! ^____^
and if you didn't catch it, that guys name, Dudeura Sucka is supposed to be pronounced like this: Dude-your-a Sucker
If you've read my previous, still ongoing transformer fanfic "JetBlast" You would know what this is about, but in case you haven't read it, I shall let you in.
This takes place in the Armada time setting.
Demolisher, while stationed at the moon base felt like his life was incomplete, so decided to enrich himself with English college courses via the internet ^____^ wonderful thing the net, aint it?
Anywhoo- this story is all about some of the stuff that Demolisher had to write.......
Here I've posted the info about what happened in JetBlast that before this
**
"What are you doing?" Megatron couldn't believe the state of his troops. First victory dances, then expressive art courses, what would be next? Megatron slapped his forehead, for he already knew.
__
*flashback to a few days before, at Decepticon headquaters*
Cyclonus smiled. "Megatron, why didn't you let us finish them off. Me and Demolisher were perfectly capable of handling that mission!"
"Uh-hum." Demolisher cleared his throat. "Uh, Demolisher and I."
Cyclonus whipped around. "What's with all this grammatically correct stuff? Since when have you cared about proper English?"
"Since I've been taking online college course over the internet in that subject." Demolisher smiled.
"What?" Megatron turned his head and looked at his minion with a sideway look. "Why in the universe did you do that?"
"Well..." Demolisher shuffled his feet. "I figured that we'd be here for a long time, so thought I might as well do something useful and better my education. Truth be told, I've always wanted to write a war novel about the Cybertronian wars."
"Ugh..." Megatron slapped his face. "Why me?"
Demolisher scratched his head. "The only problem is that they think I'm a 'Daniel Thor' that lives at a secret military base, especially since all of my homework has been about battles and space."
"I think you should stop wasting your time and concentrate on getting the mini cons!" Megatron slammed his fist into his throne's arm.
"Uh, yes sir." Demolisher recoiled.
Megatron sighed.
*end flashback*
__
Megatron groaned. "Ah yes. We have the mini con, let's go!"
"Before you get anymore crazy earth ideas, what will be next? Rap singing and break dancing?" Megatron shuddered at that thought as he warped back to base.
**
okay, that was the part from "JetBlast" now begins this story....
**
The Essays of Daniel Thor
First installment: Registration
Demolisher clicked aimlessly through the earthlings Internet. It had been a new hobby for him since he had been stationed at the moon base. There was nothing much to do and boredom often forced the bots to resort to native techniques to battle their free time.
Demolisher sighed, seeing yet another flashing pop up ad. "I hate these things." He moved the thing that the humans called a mouse towards the small 'x' in the corner to close the ad when something caught his attention.
"Do you feel like your life is incomplete? Can't get any good jobs? Do you feel like pond scum that comes from a fish's posterior? Then do we have the thing for you! Become one of the many successful students of this highly esteemed program, College for Dummies!"
Demolisher sat, mesmerized by the ad. It seemed that it was calling him. Some more words popped up on the screen.
"That's right, for one ridiculously high price we'll pretend to be educated and qualified teachers while secretly scamming you out of your money! All while earning your degree in your choice of field! Click now or miss out on your one chance!"
Demolisher didn't waste a nano-second. He quickly clicked on the ad, the college's homepage popped up.
"Hmm. 'Are you a dummy? Are you scammed easily? Are you currently working at a dead end job with a low monthly income? Register now and get yourself trapped in loads of debt!' Sounds good to me." Demolisher clicked the large icon that said "Register now!"
"Hm. Okay..." A screen with a bunch of blanks popped up.
Name:
"That one's easy. 'Demolisher'." The gullible bot typed.
Address:
"The moon." He spelled carefully.
Current Occupation:
"Soldier."
Bank account number:
"Hm." Demolisher thought a moment. "What's a 'bank account number'? I guess I'll just make up a few random numbers." The bot hummed.
"9425678910"
Field of choice: (Please choose one)
Scamming
Ads
Psychology
"Hmm. That might be a good one, considering the state of my comrades, not to mention my commander....." Demolisher drummed his black fingers on his desk top before continuing to scroll down.
Technology
"I already know too much about that." The green robot rolled his optics. "I am technology! What else do you have?"
Nursing
Accounting
"My mother-borg always said that I was good with numbers...." Demolisher shook the idea off.
Teaching
Law enforcement
"I already do that! I want to do something new!"
English
Demolisher froze. "What is English?" He thought a moment. "Maybe this is destiny calling me! Yes, either I feel compelled to learn this foreign thing or my Energon recharge was bad!" Demolisher got up and did a hyper little dance around the room before settling back down into the chair and typed 'English' as his field of choice.
He clicked the button on the bottom. "Submit."
He sighed, settling back into his chair, his arms resting behind his head. "Now all I have to do is wait for a reply." He smiled. "This might be fun."
**
Dear Daniel Thor,
We are pleased that you have chosen our company to help you down your career path. We notice that you have chosen 'English' as your field of choice. For a small fee we shall be transferring you to an actual college of that specialty. Thank you for choosing us for helping you spend some of your money. You may follow the link to the college.
Thank you-
Dudeura Sucka Administrator of College for Dummies
**
Demolisher scratched his head as he read the email. "Ohkay....I guess I'll follow the link."
He clicked the link.
Another college's page popped up. A little smiling cat's head cartoon danced across the screen.
"Konnichiwa! Welcome to the esteemed university of English for Idiots! How may we help you further your education?"
"Uh...." Demolisher stared unbelievably at the screen. A dialogue box popped up on the computer monitor. He took it that he was to respond.
"I want to learn English."
The cat tilted its head. "As a language or as grammar?"
"I already know the language! I want to learn how to use it, so I'm guessing grammar."
"Oh kay dookay!" The cat twirled around and disappeared as an actual person's picture appeared on the screen.
"Welcome to administrations." The digitized picture smiled.
"This is just too weird." Demolisher lost his train of thought for a moment. "Wait a second, I can see you, can you see me?!" Demolisher stood up, knocking his chair down.
"What's going on in there?" Starscream's voice called through the door to Demolisher's quarters.
"Uh, nothing. I just tripped, is all." Demolisher righted the chair and began closing the screen on his computer.
"Whatever..." Starscream mumbled as he went on clunking down the hallway.
"Whew." Demolisher wiped his metallic brow. "That was a close one. Megatron would freak if he knew I was meddling in earthly things."
A knock on the door interrupted the bot's thoughts.
"Who is it?" He called out.
"Hey Demolisher, I want you to listen to this!" Cyclonus's voice whined.
The green bot within the room groaned as he slapped his head. "What now, Cyclonus?"
"I want you to listen to this rap song of mine..."
Fear gripped Demolisher. "Uh, no. Go away, I'm busy!"
"Sure, that's what they all say. What are you doing in there?" Cyclonus persisted.
"Nothing! Go away!"
"Fine!" The copter bot stomped his metal foot. "I'm sure somewhere out there in the universe appreciates my talent!"
"Feh," Demolisher rolled his eyes as soon as his crazy comrade was out of hearing range. "On a planet where the inhabitants have no ears!" He laughed as he turned his computer off...until tomorrow.
**
^___^ so....what'd you think? ^___^ I know, this isn't the best chapter, this is just the introductory. The real fun is about to begin ^___^ plz review! I am open to any suggestions! ^____^
and if you didn't catch it, that guys name, Dudeura Sucka is supposed to be pronounced like this: Dude-your-a Sucker