A sort of sequel to 'Arthur the wanker...' based on a dream I had after writing that story. (It is about the same 'Merlin' and 'Arthur' as in that story, but I changed it so that the personalities matched that of the real Merlin and Arthur!) But it can be read separately. So I posted it alone! Enjoy!
--
"They played really well tonight! I'm so glad we got tickets for this!" Merlin said with a smile as he, Arthur and a crowd of other Zico Chain fans descended the stairs that lead up to the venue they'd just played in.
"You mean you're glad that I got us tickets," Arthur said with a smirk as he ruffled Merlin's hair. Merlin groaned and pushed Arthur's hands away.
"Argh! That ticket was a Christmas present! And leave my hair alone, it gets all fluffy after you've messed with it." Merlin moaned at Arthur. Arthur laughed, and was about to tease Merlin about his utter stupidity when he realised they'd stepped outside, straight into 6 inches of fleshly fallen snow.
"Shit," Arthur said as the snow immediately soaked through his near black jeans. Merlin's jaw dropped as he watched the other fans go nuts in the snow, throwing snowballs and making snow angels.
"How can so much snow have fallen, in London, in such a short space of time?" he cried. "I'm never going to get home now," Arthur found himself laughing. Merlin lived in Ealdor, an hour's train journey away. There was no was that train was running tonight!
"You can crash at mine, don't worry, I'm not about to let you sleep in 6 inches of snow now am I?" Arthur teased. Merlin sighed. As much as he didn't really want to go back to Arthur's – not after all that had happened between them recently – he didn't have much of a choice. It was either that, or freeze to death in the unexpected blizzard.
"Sure, but will your bus even be running in this weather?" he asked as he and Arthur waded their way through the snow, towards the nearest bus stop.
"We'll see," Arthur sighed.
--
Arthur's bus wasn't running, in fact, no buses were.
"Bloody typical England, a sprinkling of snow and everything just... stops," Arthur sighed, kicking a nearby lamppost as he did so. "Looks like we're going to have to walk to mine mate. It will take an hour at least, maybe two!"
"Better than that hypothermia," Merlin smiled. Arthur rolled his eyes and marched off in the direction his bus would normally go in.
"I hate the snow!" he raged as Merlin rushed to catch up with him. Merlin chuckled.
"How can you hate the snow? It's so much fun, what with snow fights and snowmen! Didn't you ever have snow days as a kid?" Merlin asked, remembering fondly as he did so, days when it had snowed so much (well, when it snowed at all!) his school had to be shut for the day. He and his friends would build snow walls, and would have epic snow fights.
"No!" Arthur retorted. It was a lie really. He loved the snow, and he loved snow days as a kid. In fact he loved any excuse not to go to school when he was a kid.
"Really?" Merlin said with a laugh, an eyebrow raised.
"Fine, I love the snow, I just hate having to traipse through it for hours just to get home!" Arthur whined. "You get so cold and wet! It sucks the fun right out of snow," Merlin chuckled and kicked snow at Arthur. "Hey! Bitch!" Arthur cried with a laugh as he brought up his hands to protect his face.
"You love me really," Merlin teased, kicking more snow in Arthur's direction. Arthur rolled his eyes and reached up to grasp a branch above his head. "No Arthur! Don't..!" Merlin gasped as he tried to run out of the way. It was too late however, Arthur shook the branch with all his strength causing all the snow atop of it to come cascading down onto Merlin – who now resembled a snowman (if a skinny one).
"Still think that?" Arthur teased as Merlin swept the snow of his shoulders and hair. Merlin simply scowled.
--
"Are you sure you know where we're going?" Merlin teased an hour later. He and Arthur were still in central London, and were in Soho... again. Arthur shot Merlin a warning look before carrying on in the direction he was going in. "Come on Arthur, we've been in Soho three times in the last hour!" Arthur groaned and massaged between his eyes.
"I don't know where to go in central London.... if we could just find my station we'd be fine but... I normally get the tube or bus from round here so I don't know where to go," Arthur moaned.
"Can't you just follow the bus route?" Merlin asked huddling up in his coat as the cold started to seep through to his bones. Staying still in such cold conditions was never a good idea!
"I was!" Arthur yelled, angrier that he intended. "Argh, I'm sorry I'm just... lost, and I don't like it," Merlin smiled slightly, gave Arthur a playful nudge on the shoulder.
"Wanna ask someone?" He asked, looking around at the brimming over clubs and pubs that surrounded them, and at the barely dressed women, and drug fuelled men that stood smoking outside them. He rolled his eyes at them.
"I'm not asking anyone round here... I'll be lucky if they hear me, let alone understand a word I say," Arthur sighed. "Come on, I can't be arsed with walking around anymore. Let's find an all night cafe, I'll treat you to a coffee," Merlin raised an eyebrow.
"Coffee?" he asked with a smirk.
"Tea, I'll get you some tea," Arthur corrected with a roll of his eyes.
"That's better," Merlin smiled. Arthur shook his head and followed after him.
--
"You know it's funny," Merlin said half an hour later as they wandered through a virtually untouched Covent Garden. "We walked round central London for an hour, and must have passed half a dozen open cafes, and now we're looking for one, we can't find one,"
"Yeah, so very funny," Arthur said sarcastically. Yet he was smiling. Merlin found himself smiling back at Arthur, and for a few seconds, they just stared, stared and smiled. Merlin's stomach tingled with an electricity that flowed between them and electricity that he was sure Arthur felt too. Yet he felt the overwhelming urge to look away. There was something about Arthur's smile that made him blush and feel uncomfortable. Was it because he saw sympathy in Arthurs smile, sympathy for an unrequited love? Or was it because it was a smile of love? Of feelings finally returned? Of fear at expressing them? Merlin broke the almost unmanageable tension by kicking snow at Arthur – again. "Hey!" Arthur laughed, ducking out of the way. Merlin gave an innocent smile, a shrug of his shoulders.
"What did I do?" he said in a childlike manner. Arthur smiled, narrowed his eyes and dug his hands deep into the fresh snow. "Hey.... wait a minute..." Merlin cried, eyes widening as he backed off. But Arthur wasn't listening; he was balling up a load of snow in his hands. "Arthur..." Merlin chuckled as he backed off even faster. Arthur just widened his smirk as he compacted the snow as much as possible.
"Goodbye Merlin," he said with a grin, a gleam in his eyes. He flung the snowball with all his strength and Merlin giggled and turned to the side as Arthurs snowball flew through the air, straight towards his face. Merlin was able to move just in time, and the snowball clipped his ear as it sailed straight onto the ground. Arthur chuckled as he reached down to ball up more snow. Merlin too, ducked down and grabbed a fistful of snow. Before he could even begin to make a ball, he got a face full of compacted snow.
"Ow!" Merlin laughed as he shook his face free of the remainder of the snowball. His face stung slightly with the impact of the cold snow on his warm skin but he simply laughed it off. He launched the snow in his hand in Arthur's general direction, but the ball broke apart, and missed Arthur by miles. Arthur was bent double with laughter.
"You're so funny Merlin, you're just... useless!" Arthur laughed. Merlin took advantage of the fact that Arthur was distracted, and dumped an arm full of snow over his head. Arthur stopped laughing at once. "You little weasel!" he cried in shock as melting snow started to seep down the back of his jacket. Merlin snickered and ran off in the opposite direction. Arthur tore after him, not even bothering to grab any snow. Merlin was ahead, but when he stopped to scoop up some snow, Arthur was able to catch up. He grabbed Merlin's wrist, held it high above his head, preventing him from throwing his snowball at Arthur. Merlin laughed uncontrollably as he tried to wrestle free.
"Arthur! That's not fair, let me go!" he giggled as he and Arthur tussled and struggled against one another. Neither could see the other through the stream of tears of laughter that filled their eyes, and soon they found themselves crashing towards the whitened ground below. Merlin was on the bottom, almost disappearing in the snow as he hit the ground. Arthur fell virtually straight on top of Merlin, stopping himself from squashing his friend completely by throwing out his hand to support his tumbling form. "That was your fault!" Merlin insisted as Arthur stopped falling just a mere inch from his face. Arthur beamed at Merlin.
"Yeah, sure I'm the clumsy oaf of a... a..." Arthur seemed to lose track his words the second his eyes connected with Merlin's. He became lost in the glittering blue orbs of his friend. They eyes that shone with amusement and contentment. Eyes that looked straight through him, right into his soul. There was something about those eyes that made Arthur tingle sensationally. "Shit..." he whispered, not moving from his position above Merlin. Merlin's beautiful blue orbs immediately widened in concern.
"What?" he asked "Did you hurt yourself?" The question was frantic, laced with worry. Merlin watched his friend for any sign of distress. Normally, the position he was in would have his heart racing, his stomach tightening, his head spinning. And it did, right up until Arthur had whispered 'Shit'. Now that spinning, that racing and the tightening was replaced with a terrible dread that seeped through his entire body in a split second. What is Arthur was really hurt? "Arthur... are you ok?" Arthur's lack of an immediate response scared Merlin even more so. "Arthur tell we what is-" But Arthur closed the gap between them before Merlin could finish, caught his lips in a soft, sweet kiss. For a few seconds, Merlin simply lay still, allowing Arthur to kiss him yet not returning the soft pressure of the kiss in any way. He was at a loss as to what to do; here was his best friend – a guy he'd been in love with just about forever – kissing him softly on the lips, despite having a long-term girlfriend. Despite the fact that he'd rejected Merlin more than a year ago. Merlin wanted to kiss him back, desperately so! But he didn't want the inevitable heartache that would come straight after. So he applied the slightest bit of pressure on Arthur's lips and, ignoring the smile he felt for it there, pushed his friend away with a small sigh of regret and sorrow.
"Merlin... I... I thought you wanted this!" Arthur mumbled, shooting Merlin a bemused expression. Merlin shook his head, quick enough he hoped, so that Arthur would not spot his tears, and stood up.
"No..." he mumbled, his voice cracking with the severity of emotion that was clogging his throat. "I don't want this! I want... I want you!" Arthur mouthed wordlessly for a few seconds, before pushing himself onto his feet, and chasing after his friend.
"That's what I was giving you! Me Merlin, what you wanted!" Arthur cried, grabbing Merlin's arm. Merlin shrugged it straight off.
"No Arthur! He shrieked. "No! I want you, all of you! I don't want some half-hearted fling one night when we are lost in London, a night that we won't even talk about encase it gets in the way of your relationship with Gwen!" Tears were streaming down Merlin's frozen cheeks, stinging slightly as they reacted to the harsh conditions into which they were born into.
"How do you know that I'm not going to give you that?" Arthur screamed back. "What if I realised in that moment I started into your eyes, that I loved you? Loved you more than I love Gwen, more than I have loved anyone?" Merlin shook his head as Arthur yelled, not believing a word he said.
"Stop fucking screwing with my head Arthur, stop it! I can't take it anymore, not a second longer!" Merlin cried out. He wished he could run away, run and never be found. But he knew that he had nowhere to go to in the snow covered city in which he was lost, especially since it was nearing 2am and the bus's remained cancelled.
"I'm not!" Arthur insisted, tears now spilling from his eyes. For once he did not try to wipe them away; for once he was not ashamed of the tears that showed the weakness's that he normally fought so hard to hide. "I'm not... I'm in love with you, I swear it Merlin," Arthur tried again t grab hold of Merlin, but Merlin again shrugged him off. Arthur watched, distraught, as Merlin leaned against the stone wall to his side, and sobbed his heart out. "Merlin..." Arthur was begging now, pleading. Merlin ignored him.
"Why are you doing this to me..?" Merlin croaked out after a few minutes of a silence broken only by his heart wrenching sobs. Arthur sighed, reached out for Merlin again and felt undeniable warmth spread through him when Merlin did not shrug him off. He took his chance and turned Merlin round, so that they were facing one another. He placed one hand on Merlin's shoulder, the other on his cheek, and let himself become lost in Merlin's shinning eyes.
"Merlin. I love you... I just didn't realise it till just now... I've... I've loved you for a long, long time... God! I feel like an idiot for not seeing it sooner..." Arthur was desperate, completely fraught with worry, and when Merlin's lips gave the smallest twitch in the way of a smile, Arthur's heart lurched so much, he felt as if he was going to be sick. "Merlin..?"
"I... I don't understand... why you would love someone.... someone like me..." he croaked, voice breaking yet again. Arthur smiled, gave a small hiccupping laugh of relief and dismay.
"Merlin, you insufferable buffoon! You just... you don't understand how special you are do you? You're the sweetest, kindest person I have ever met! You never put yourself first, never! Always your friends – no matter how much it hurts you! Even when you're down you do what it takes to help those closest to you! And you're funny, and intelligent and... you... your you and you is perfect," Arthur barely paused for breath as he desperately tried to assure Merlin that is love for him was genuine, real. Merlin was sobbing as Arthur spoke, sobbing yet beamed, giggling despite the sorrow that was so alive on his face. "Merlin, I love you..." Merlin managed to choke out a soft laugh.
"I love you too," He said through the laughter and the tears. And then Arthur's lips were upon his, a hand on each cheek. Merlin smiled, and allowed himself to kiss Arthur back – softly at first, but then more fiercely so – despite the fear that still bubbled deep within him. Arthur smiled, sighed as Merlin returned the kiss and lowered his hands so that he could capture the sides of the younger mans jacket. Without even breaking the kiss, he forced Merlin against the wall behind them, and deepened the kiss, sweeping his tongue along Merlin's chapped lip, straight into his eager mouth. Merlin groaned as he was thrust against the wall, groaned even more so as their tongues danced a fiery ballet of desire and passion.
--
"My ears are cold," Merlin whispered a few minutes later when both he and Arthur had surfaced long enough to breathe, to utter words. Arthur chuckled.
"That's because you have ears the size of dinner plates," he teased. But nevertheless, he slipped his hands over Merlin's ears, which were tinged pink with the cold. Merlin shuddered at the contact.
"Your hands are even colder!" he shrieked, pulling away. Arthur chuckled and moved his hands away.
"You'll just have to warm them up for me," he said, slipping them under the bottom of Merlin's shirt, resting them on his bare hips. Merlin shrieked in shock.
"Arthur!" he giggled. Arthur simply raised an eyebrow, smirked.
"Still not warm? Guess I'll have to remedy that," Arthur teased, moving his hands up so they rested in the middle of Arthurs back. Merlin hissed; bite his lip to stop the sound from escaping. As much as he wanted this, as much as this was sending wave after wave of passion through his body, he knew that now was not the right time for this to be happening. Arthur was still with Gwen! Arthur misunderstood the meaning of Merlin's hiss, and took it as a sign of encouragement. He pressed his lips to Merlin's again as he moved his chilled hands down towards the waistline of Merlin's jeans. Merlin groaned involuntarily as Arthur's cold finger tips brushed the very tip of his underwear. Merlin gave Arthur a shove while he still felt he could, and shook his head at Arthur.
"Arthur no... not while you're with Gwen," he sighed. "I can't be... I can't be the other person! If you want to be with me, really be with me, then you have to only be with me," he insisted. He looked at Arthur's reaction nervously, scared stiff that this was all just a lie, a fling, and that Arthur truly wanted Gwen. But Arthur nodded, smiled and nodded.
"Of course! I understand and... when I see her tomorrow... I'll end it," Arthur assured Merlin, backing that promise up with a kiss. Merlin pushed him away again.
"Theres something else Arthur I... I don't want to be a rebound... not that I'm saying that's what I'll be" But I just... I..." Arthur put a finger to his lips.
"If you want to wait to be together... a month, more... then we'll wait. I'm not going to force you to do anything you're not comfortable with," Merlin beamed at Arthur, and placed one small kiss on his lips. "What was that for?" Arthur chuckled, slipping his arms around Merlin's waist.
"For being sweet..." he whispered with a chuckle. Arthur simply smiled, rested his forehead against Merlin's.
"Love you Merlin..." Arthur whispered.
"Love you too Arthur," Merlin replied, eyes sparkling. "So, you still owe me a cup of tea," Merlin said after a few seconds of perfect silence. Arthur laughed and pulled away from the younger man.
"Oh so that's what the plan was, kiss me, dump me, and then ask me to buy you nice things!" he teased, grin reaching from ear to ear. Merlin nodded.
"Of course! All part of my genius plan," Merlin insisted. Arthur ruffled his hair.
"Merlin the word 'Genius' is not the first word I'd think of when thinking of you, in fact it would be the last..." Merlin simply silenced him with a kiss.
"Hey now! No double standards!" Arthur chuckled, pushing Merlin away. "You can't be kissing me and insist that we wait until I've been single for a few weeks," he cried, tapping Merlin on the nose.
"Alright... so are we finding this cafe then?" Merlin said, walking off in the direction that he hoped would lead to an all night cafe.
"Cafe it is," Arthur said, following behind him, and fighting the whole time, the urge to link their fingers.
--
First light later that morning, and Merlin and Arthur were aboard the tube, heading towards Tottenham Hale, where Merlin would get off and leave Arthur to continue his journey. Merlin was leaning against Arthur, almost asleep, and Arthur was tempted to just let him lie there all day.
"Merlin... wake up, it's your stop next," he said with a sigh as the tube finally pulled towards Tottenham Hale. Merlin blinked a few times, rubbed his eyes, and stretched out.
"Argh, I don't want to go..." he whined, smiling at Arthur. Arthur smiled at him, pulled him into a hug.
"I don't want you to go either but... I have to break up with Gwen, alone, and you have to go home and rest," he said, kissing the top of Merlin's head. Merlin nodded sadly as he returned the hug.
"I'll let you know... when I'm ready... for us," he whispered.
"Take as much time as you need... well, unless you need years! I don't really want to wait years," Arthur laughed. Merlin laughed too, looked up into Arthurs eyes.
"But you would, wouldn't you..?" he asked. Arthur chuckled.
"Of course," he promised. Merlin beamed at him, moved his head so that their lips were a mere inch apart.
"That's all I needed to hear..." he whispered, pressing his lips against Arthurs. Arthur chuckled, but pulled Merlin closer, deepened the kiss. The kiss was more desperate that their last, frantic. They knew it would be their last for a long while and neither want it to end.
"Welcome to Tottenham Hale..."
Merlin pulled away from Arthur, gave him a sad smile.
"I've got to go..." he whispered. Arthur nodded, kissed him once again. "Love you Arthur," he whispered as he departed his seat and headed towards the open doors.
"Love you too Merlin..." Arthur whispered, watching his friend turned lover walk off the train, the smile on his lips reaching his ears.
--
*sigh* if only... still, dreams can come true... right..?