The Lordly Frog
He'd never, ever learn, would he? All that had been needed was just the slightest bit of self restraint, shut his gob for just a moment, and show the tiniest bit of respect for local customs and cultures. And revered wise women. But no. He just never knew when to shut up, and so here he was - tiny, green, and just a touch slimy. Forget the bit about True Love's Kiss being the only remedy for the stupid curse he'd blundered into - he'd be lucky not to be swallowed whole by a passing cat.
He knew quite well that the only thing that had saved him from being crushed underneath the old bat's boot heel was Rose's impassioned plea on his behalf. The witch had smiled benignly at Rose and promised the golden-haired girl that if her heart was pure and true, her love would set him free. He cringed inwardly at the saccharine, fairy-tale nature of that declamation. (He was, of course, unable to cringe outwardly, on account of currently being a tiny green frog.)
And that was just adding insult to injury - instead of being a strong, manly bullfrog, capable of great bounding leaps, and deep, impressive croaks, he was little bit of a thing, able to emit just the tiniest of peeps. He reckoned he could fit right inside one of the flowers blooming in this garden and not even be seen.
That thought caused him to emit one of those tiny, little peeps. How on earth was Rose going to be able to find his insignificant, green self amidst the profusion of grass and flowers that towered over him like skyscrapers? Also, it was getting dreadfully hot under the noonday sun. He strongly suspected that miniature little froggies were meant to be snoozing in cool mud at this time of day…but if he hid himself away in the soothing brown ooze, how would Rose ever find him?
Oh, dear…he really needed out of the sun, and quickly. The nearest source of shade was a lovely pink rose bush. He hopped closer, eyeing the lush blooms. The petals were just the color of Rose's lips, he thought longingly, and the scent was divine. He gathered his strength, and hopped up into the nearest flower. The blossom was dew-drenched, and provided the perfect sanctuary from the roasting rays of the sun.
He must have dozed in his delightful little bower, because the next thing he knew, he was blinking his round eyes up at the single loveliest face in all the cosmos.
"Is that you?" Rose asked in a breathy whisper.
He peeped at her joyfully. Also, repeatedly.
"All right, all right - still haven't learned when to shut it, have you?"
One single, little peep, that somehow managed to sound a bit ashamed. He felt himself ever so gently transferred to her warm and waiting palm.
"You know," Rose said, in a tone of severity that he knew to be a total sham, "I'm half tempted to leave you like this until you learn some manners."
His little eyes bulged out of his little face, and this time the peep managed to sound outraged.
"If I fix you, do you promise to behave yourself? No more insultin' local species? Or their customs? Or the way they talk? Hmm?"
Rose didn't know how a frog small enough to use rose petals for a bed could look contrite, but somehow, he did. "All right, then," she said softly, and raised the tiny creature to her lips.
The Doctor drew in a startled gasp and slapped his hands about himself wildly. Arms, legs, hair - all there. And hands, manly, hairy hands that reached out and clasped Rose's face as he leaned in and pressed a joyful kiss to her forehead.
"Hello," she said, grinning.
"Hello," he replied, his smile - his lovely, humanoid smile - matching her own. "Did you miss me?"
Rose tipped her head to one side, considering.
"Oi!"
"I'm thinking," she replied sweetly. "That little green fellow was awfully cute…and didn't cause half so much trouble…"
"But he couldn't do this, could he?" the Doctor murmured as he leaned in and kissed her softly.