Lizzie woke up with a sudden jolt; it inevitably broke her away from her slumber. Turning over in her bed, she glanced at the alarm clock on her dresser to read the time as 2:11 a.m. She groaned at the ungodly time, however the sudden vibrations of the action made her realize her throat was desert dry.
Needing a drink, she crept out of her room and towards the staircase to go to the kitchen. Though half-way in her pursuit, Lizzie finally noticed in her sleepy daze that the living room lights were still on and that the television was still running. She gruffed in annoyance as she began to stalk determinately down the stairs to turn off everything. Being noisy be damned. She couldn't believe the nerve of this family and their inability to conserve energy!
But once she reached the bottom of the stairs, she caught the sight of dark, tussled locks sitting in the arm chair. "Derek?" Lizzie called out as best as she could muster as she stepped off the last step. She waited a moment in patient silence, but he never made a sound.
Lizzie rolled her eyes as she walked over to his chair, thinking to herself that he probably fell asleep. Reaching over to retrieve the remote to shut the set off, she jumped back in surprise when she found Derek not asleep but wide-awake.
"Derek?" she tried again, but he still didn't answer. His eyes were glazed and unfocused. His hair was more disheveled than it usually was, like he had been wringing his fingers through his hair over and over again. He didn't budge either. He didn't even look like he knew she was there, standing right next to him.
"Derek!" she called harshly, but still low enough not to wake anyone in the house, though the act felt like someone grazed her throat with sandpaper. When he still didn't acknowledge her, she shook his arm roughly for good measure.
He hummed out a response, before he slowly turned his head to her. Confusion swept blatantly across his face. "Liz? What are you doing up?"
Lizzie crossed her arms in irritation. "I should be asking you that question. Wasting all this electricity for-" she paused to look at what was playing on the television screen, "-water polo? Really, Derek?"
Derek's eyebrows rose comically in surprise. "Huh? I was watching -" but he cut himself off when he too looked at the screen. "Oh...it must have ended..."
Lizzie mockingly snorted. "Evidently," she snarled. Derek glared. "Well, you were pretty out it," Lizzie regarded, taking a tentative seat on the arm of the couch. "Why were you so spaced out anyway?"
Derek's eyes grew dark and his glare deepened to the point that numerous wrinkles were now displayed on his forehead. "One: I don't space - that's Casey's specialty. Two: Even if I was - which I wasn't - it's none of your business!" he practically growled out.
Lizzie rolled her eyes at her stepbrother's stubbornness. "Whatever. Either way, I know you were thinking about something. The question now is: what?"
"I was just thinking about university, alright?!" Derek barked, "You satisfied?"
Lizzie cool demeanor didn't shift; she wasn't afraid of Derek like Edwin. "And just what about university had you so deep in thought? Because I don't think I've ever seen you think that hard," Lizzie pointed out.
"Ha, ha, ha!" Derek sarcastically laughed, "very funny. Now go away." He quickly snatched the remote from Lizzie's hands and began switching the channels for something better to watch.
"You know you can tell me whatever is on your mind," Lizzie politely offered. "People say I'm a really good person to talk to…"
"There's nothing to talk about," Derek insisted hastily, never taking his eyes off the television, though Lizzie saw him shift in his seat a bit uncomfortably.
Sighing, Lizzie decided to stop trying. Clearly Derek was not going to talk about whatever was bothering him.
She got up, making her way to her original destination to get that much needed glass of water. Gulping down half of the cold liquid, Lizzie instantly felt better. She soon finished up her glass and made her way back to the living room to head back up the stairs.
As Lizzie reached the first step towards the landing, Derek spoke. "Is she going?"
Lizzie paused in her actions and swiftly turned around to face Derek, who still hadn't moved from his place on his recliner. Lizzie took a moment to process what her oldest step-brother had just said, but suddenly she realized exactly what he was talking about and whom.
The younger McDonald took that first step off the stairs and walked over to the couch to sit. "I don't know," she answered. "She still doesn't know."
Derek looked wretchedly thoughtful. "But she likes school, right?" he whispered into the air, as if they were sharing a secret. Knowing Derek, maybe he was.
"You know she likes school," Lizzie answered, chuckling lightly at her sister's inane passion for school.
Lizzie saw Derek's lips turn into a bitter but fond smile. "But not as much as dance…" he commented sadly, twiddling his thumbs together like a petulant child.
Lizzie frowned but stayed silent since she didn't know what to say. A silence hung over them; the low volume of a late-night talk show was the only noise to their ears.
"Dance – dance is unpredictable," he began a few moments later. "She could jump and twist a wrong way and dance could be over. But with school, school is where she really excels. I have - I mean, school has always been there for her…"
Lizzie suddenly grasped they weren't really talking about school or dance, at least not fully. "Derek," she breathed out softly.
Derek shoved his hands into his hair as he rested his elbows on his knees. "I'm going insane, Liz," he quietly admitted.
"You don't want her to go," she asked, but it came out more as a statement. Lizzie knew Derek wouldn't want Casey to go, despite all the fighting the two had done over the years. The two had practically been inseparable this summer, but Lizzie also knew Derek cared about Casey, and not in the same manner that he cared about the rest of the people in the household.
"Of course I don't want her to go!" Derek quietly groaned, pulling at his hair.
"Then why don't you tell her that!" Lizzie exclaimed gently.
For the first time since they began talking, Derek turned his head to look directly into her eyes. Lizzie could clearly see the sadness and anguish swimming in his muddy orbs. He laughed an empty laugh. "If I ask her to stay, she'll go."
"You don't know that."
He shook his head. "She never listens to me. You've heard her. If I ask her to do something she does the opposite. So if I ask her to stay, she'll go."
"Then ask her to leave," Lizzie simply offered.
"But then what if she listens," Derek whispered wretchedly. "I can't take that chance…"
"What if you tell her-" Lizzie began, but Derek interrupted her.
"Tell her what?" Derek demanded lightly. "Tell her my f-f-feelings?"
Lizzie nodded timidly.
"I can see that going so well," he sarcastically quipped, chuckling mirthlessly. "Yeah, hi, Casey. I know I'm Derek, the stepbrother that made your life a living hell since you walked into this house, but I'm in love with you. And I'm going to be an even more selfish bastard than I usually am and ask you to not go to New York, even though it's your dream, because I'll miss you."
Lizzie gasped at his confession. Surprised not by his feelings but by the abruptness of his admission.
"I told her before that I would never mess with her dream," he said, somewhat regrettably. "So if she stays, it should be because she wants to, not because I want her to."
The younger McDonald now had a much deeper respect for her step-brother than she thought she would ever have. He really had matured over the years. And he must really love and care for her sister if he was willing to make the sacrifice of losing her, so she could pursue her dream.
Derek began to watch the TV and Lizzie thought their little heart to heart had reached its close. Just as she was about to get up from the couch, Derek spoke up again.
"I had almost given up on it," Derek admitted. "She had applied to all these uppity up schools that I could never get a glimpse of, let alone attend. Of course I applied to them all too just for kicks, but I never thought I'd actually get accepted to any of them…" he lamented.
Lizzie stayed mute, knowing Derek needed to get these things off his chest without interruption.
"Casey got her acceptance letter the day before mine. I had listened to her through the vent, rattling to Emily over the phone about Queen's accepting her and that she was definitely going to go there. I had resigned myself at that point that we'd be going separate ways, whether I liked it or not. But then…" Derek said, trailing off. He swallowed down heavy emotion. "Then I got my acceptance letter and I thought someone was pranking me!" he said, chuckling at himself.
"I just kept reading the acceptance over and over and over again and feeling it, making sure it was real because, honestly, what were the odds?" Derek asked, shaking his head in amazement. "Things were clicking in place and it just felt like that fate crap Casey is always rambling on about and…"
Derek chuckled over a laugh, obviously remembering something. "Then this summer we were looking at catalogs and talking about the campus and in our roundabout ways we were making plans to still see each other during the semester. I was actually excited for school to start!"
Lizzie had to giggle at that. Hearing her laughter, Derek turned to her and smirked her way.
"Everything was going so well. To the point that I thought that maybe, just maybe, at Queen's something could happen between us…" he continued, smiling wistfully as he trailed off. "Then of course we went to your grandmother's and it all turned to shit. With Jesse," he said, spatting out the name of the other guy, "and getting that opportunity to dance in New York…how - how can I compete with that?"
Lizzie wanted to reassure Derek, but she had no idea what Casey was going to do. One day she was set to go to New York, but the next she'd want to go to Queen's. Knowing Casey, Lizzie had a good feeling that her sister held some feelings for Derek. But because Lizzie knew Casey, she also knew that Casey was most likely denying it all. She didn't want to get Derek's hopes up just for Casey to crush them.
Derek abruptly got up from his recliner. "All this sappy crap has wiped me out," he weakly joked. Lizzie cracked a smile, but there was a hint of pity in her eyes, and she knew Derek saw it too. "I'm gonna head up to my room," he told her, making his way to the staircase.
Lizzie watched him, and as he reached the landing he turned to face her. "This conversation never happened," he tried to warn lightheartedly, but his eyes were too serious and frightful.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Lizzie replied, flashing him a knowing grin.
He smiled back appreciatively, mouthing a 'thanks' before he walked all the way up the stairs and out of her sight.
A/N: Yup, new story. I've had this written on my laptop for ages, thinking it was only going to be a one-shot but it turned out to fit really well with this new story. Hope you all like it so far! Review with your thoughts! I love them. :)