Mishappy Birthday, Baby
part 1

TaleSpin and its characters are property of Disney. All other characters are mine and cannot be used without permission.

Higher for Hire
July 7, 1940
Morning

"No, Baloo," Rebecca said firmly as she leaned over the highchair's tray to wipe a droplet of milk from Cassie's chin, causing the baby to squeal in protest.

Nine-year-old Molly glanced up from her cereal to flash a look of dismay across the table at her fifteen-year-old brother. Kit nodded wearily and continued eating his breakfast. Their parents were fighting again.

"But, Becky..." Baloo entreated.

"No buts. You are not taking Cassie for a plane ride without me along and that's final."

"Port Largo's less'n a hop, skip, an' jump away. We'll be there an' back before you can say jackrabbit. 'Sides Kit'll be along."

Kit tried to hide behind the Cheery-Os box. "Keep me out of this," he murmured.

"The day you put the toilet seat down is the day you can take her." Rebecca rose from her chair and untied the bib from around Cassie's neck.

Baloo scowled at that remark, but forged ahead earnestly. "A gal don't turn one every day."

"If you take her with you, she probably won't live to see two," Rebecca retorted, picking up Cassie. As was her wont, the toddler fingered her mother's hair.

"She's my kid, too, an' this is what Daddy wants to give her for her very first b-day." Baloo gently tickled Cassie's toes.

At the sound of the baby's delighted giggles, Rebecca's heart thawed, even though her expression didn't. Reluctantly, she said, "Well...I do need to get some party supplies at the store..."

Molly, who loved birthday parties, said excitedly, "We're gonna get balloons, streamers, some presents..."

"And it would be easier without her along," Rebecca concluded.

Before she could change her mind, Baloo kissed his wife's cheek. "Thanks, Beckers. An' don't worry about a thing. Me an' Kit'll take good care of this little munchkin."

The Sea Duck
A Half Hour Later

"Ca'go! Ca'go!" Cassie, seated on Kit's lap, babbled over and over.

"Yeah, we're gonna deliver cargo," Kit mumbled, trying to see the map around Cassie' curly head. He regretted teaching her that word, because he knew she would repeat it the entire day. This is gonna be a long flight.

Rebecca, standing on the dock, peering through the Sea Duck's cockpit window, asked, "Do you have her diaper bag, extra bottles, and blanket?"

"Yup, yup, an' yup," Baloo replied with an amused grin.

"Don't forget Woobie!" Molly said, running down the dock with a well-loved, once-white teddy bear.

Rebecca passed the teddy bear through the window to Baloo, who handed the toy to Cassie.

Hugging her favorite toy, she repeated happily, "Bee, bee, bee."

"At least it's not 'ca'go'," Kit murmured to himself as he tried to see the map around both Cassie and Woobie.

"Ca'go bee bee. Ca'go bee bee," Cassie babbled.

Oh, swell, Kit thought sarcastically. Thanks, Papa Bear, for the fantastic idea of taking Cassie with us. Why not add a couple of gorilla birds, too?

"You sure we need all this junk? We're only gonna be gone a coupla hours," Baloo said.

"That's a long time for a baby. Better to be safe than sorry. Now, the record players must be delivered by noon to Noteworthy's Music Shop. They should have a truck waiting for you at the airfield. If they don't, contact Carol at the number at the top of the page." She handed him a clipboard with important information. Baloo, in turn, passed the clipboard to Kit, who was having trouble keeping the energetic toddler from wriggling out of his grasp.

"Is that it?" Baloo asked, flipping switches on the control panel. One powerful Superflight 100 engine roared to life, then the other.

Pushing her hair out of her face, Rebecca shouted over the roar of the propellers, "You forgot one very important thing!"

"What?" Baloo glanced over his shoulder at the pile of baby stuff littering the cockpit floor. "We got everythin' but the kitchen sink, unless you think we need that, too."

Rebecca shook her head. With a tender gleam in her eyes, she said, "Be careful."

Baloo leaned out the window and kissed her. "We will, honey."

"Bye, Daddy," Molly said, waving at him. "Have a good flight."

"Bye, Muffin." Leaning out the window, he said with a wink, "Remember Cassie likes chocolate cake with extry fudge-y frosting."

Molly giggled. "That's your favorite, not Cassie's."

"Make sure you radio me if you have any trouble," Rebecca shouted.

Before he taxied the seaplane away from the dock, Baloo said with a dismissive wave of his hand, "Aw, how much trouble can a one-year-old get into?"

The Sea Duck
One Hour Later

"A little help with this little troublemaker, Papa Bear!" Kit said through clenched teeth. He wrenched the map out of Cassie's mouth, causing a big hole to be ripped out of the center of it. "Great. Just great." With forced patience, he said, "Spit out the paper, Cassie."

She spit a small, slimy wad of paper into his outstretched hand.

He tossed the wad onto the floor with a disgusted, "Yuck!"

"Ca'go bee bee! Ca'go bee bee!" she exclaimed happily, clapping her hands.

"Yeah, cargo bee bee. I think she's hungry," Kit said, frowning through the map's hole at the little girl, who was now trying to devour his compass.

"Well, feed her somethin'," Baloo said testily. Having a baby along changed everything. The normally peaceful flight had been anything but peaceful. He could almost hear Rebecca and her great big 'I told you so'. How he wished that she was here to keep Cassie entertained and out of mischief.

"No way!" exclaimed Kit, who was also wishing that Rebecca was present. Gently but firmly, he extracted the compass from his sister's mouth. Over Cassie's protesting shrieks, he said loudly, "I don't want her to get airsick again, which, by the way, was your fault."

Baloo picked Woobie up from the floor and offered it to the fractious toddler. Her loud cries quieted to a ragged whimper as she hugged the toy with one hand and scrunched the map up in the other hand, fascinated by the crackling sound.

"How was I s'posed ta know bananas would upset her tiny tum-tum? She normally likes 'em."

"Just because she likes bananas doesn't mean you had to stuff her full of Louie's banana burritos." My shirt will never be the same again.

"Well, I...er..." Baloo rubbed the back of his neck nervously and rapidly changed the subject. "What's our position, partner?"

"You tell me. I'm experiencing...let go, Cassie!...a small technical difficulty here." He tore the battered map from her, ripping it nearly in two. "At this rate, we won't have a map left."

"Okay, okay...I'll take her offa your hands for a while." Baloo picked up the toddler. "C'mere, Cookie," he crooned.

"Ugh. Don't mention food." Kit grimaced and spread what was left of the map out on his lap.

Cassie, hugging Woobie and sucking her thumb, sat quietly on Baloo's lap for a while. Then, her little eyes lit up with curiosity at the sight of all the buttons and dials on the control panel. Lunging out of her father's grasp, she reached for them.

"No!" He put her on the deck and gently said, "Go an' play with Woobie where you can't get into any trouble...Cassie!"

She had pushed open the ajar cargo hold door and disappeared into cargo hold.

"Doggone it!" Baloo unfastened his seatbelt and rose from the pilot's seat. "Take the stick, Li'l Britches, while I go catch that little..."

"Bugaboo?" Kit said with a sly smile.

Baloo screeched to a halt. Cold sweat beaded on his brow. For fear of severe embarrassment, he had hoped to keep Cassie's special nickname a secret, especially from his wife. "You know about 'Bugaboo'?"

"Sure." At Baloo's panicked expression, he added, "Don't worry. I won't tell Mom."

"You'd better not, or I'll cut your flight time." He pushed Kit's cap down over his eyes playfully, then headed to the cargo hold, calling, "Cassie? Come on out, kitten. Bugaboo?"

From the far recesses of the cargo hold, he heard a little voice chirp, "Boo!"

Baloo looked around every single pile of crates as he carefully pushed his way between them. "Where are ya?"

"Boo!" She streaked across the cargo hold and ran between Baloo's legs.

"Gotcha!" He blew a raspberry on her cheek and tossed the giggling girl in the air.

Baloo carried her back to the cockpit, securely shutting door behind him. When Kit started to move from the pilot's seat, he said, "Nah, you fly for a while, kid."

"Really?"

"You won't learn if ya don't do." Baloo settled in the navigator's seat and told Cassie, "Your big brother's gonna be an ace someday. Why doncha give him a high-five?"

Kit held out his palm.

"Five. Give him five, like this," Baloo said gently, slapping Kit's palm.

Cassie slapped his hand. "Fibe!"

Kit returned the high-five. "Here's 'fibe' back, kiddo. Whoops!" he said as the plane lurched to the right.

"Hang onto 'er."

Just then, Cassie wiggled out of Baloo's arms.

"Speaking of hanging on to her," Kit laughed.

"Hey, come back here!"

Port Largo
Two Hours Later

Port Largo, a major trading center on the shores of the Alimentary Canal, fairly sung with activity. Boats and barges floated up and down the muddy waterway on their way to and from the mighty Sippymissy River. On the outskirts of the city, adjacent to the canal, was an airfield where large cranes reared their metal heads, incessantly transferring goods from the barges to waiting planes and trucks.

Amid the hustle and bustle of the airfield was an intellectual-looking chimpanzee in khakis and a brown fedora. His two goals at the moment were to avoid being trampled on and, more importantly, to find a ride to Cape Suzette.

After the tenth pilot had turned him down and told him gruffly to get out of the way, Professor O'Bowens wondered how long it would take him to walk to Cape Suzette.

Days, the esteemed archeologist thought despondently. But he would do it if he had to if it meant getting his precious artifact safely to the museum. Hadn't he once sailed five hundred miles on a makeshift raft, the last four hundred miles on literally his own steam power?

Feeling someone watching him, he put a protective hand over the pouch hanging on his left side and determinedly strode towards the next plane.

He had just cast an anxious look over his shoulder when he ran headlong into a man toting a tower of crates towards a truck.

"Hey, watch it, buddy!" the man barked, regaining his balance and steadying the crates.

"Sorry." Professor O'Bowens shoved his glasses up further on his nose to get a better look at the man addressing him. His face brightened with recognition and relief. "Baloo!"

Baloo grinned. "Well, if it ain't my ol' pal, the professor. How're ya doin'?" He slid the crates into the truck and cordially shook the professor's hand.

"Am I glad to see you and Kit." He nodded to the young man, who had emerged from the Sea Duck's cargo hold with Cassie toddling behind. "I know you're going to Cape Suzette."

"Yup, as soon as we get these record players delivered." Baloo scooped up Cassie when she ran by him.

"How long will that take?"

"Oh, 'bout fifteen minutes."

Slightly panicked, the archeologist exclaimed, "Fifteen minutes?"

"Maybe less. How come you're so hopped up about gettin' to Cape Suzette anyhoo?"

Once again, Professor O'Bowens glanced over his shoulder and gestured for Baloo and Kit to come closer. "This," he whispered, drawing an amulet from the pouch: a large amethyst ringed by a thick layer of the purest gold. The sunlight glinted off the amethyst's many facets and accentuated the unusual writing inscribed in the gold.

"Wow! Where'd you find that?" Kit asked.

"Buried beneath the ruins of Gagagoogie."

Simultaneously, Baloo and Kit said, "Gagagoogie?"

Cassie stretched eager hands towards the shiny bauble. Swiftly, the professor removed it from her reach.

"Centuries ago, Gagagoogie was a thriving civilization. Their architecture was rivaled only by Babbleonanonia. They had an extremely complex language with an alphabet made up of over two hundred letters."

Kit muttered to himself, "I'd hate to be in that spelling class."

Baloo shifted Cassie to the other arm. "What happened to Gagagoogie? I ain't never heard of it."

Professor O'Bowens said, "That's the thing. No one knows, because no one's been able to decipher their language. But, according to an ancient Babbleonanonian scroll that was found last year, in 235 B.C. a group of nomads who had traveled to Gagagoogie to trade found something very odd."

"What?" Kit asked eagerly.

Mysteriously, the professor said, "Babies."

Looking down at Cassie in confusion, Baloo said, "Babies are odd?"

Cassie grinned, showing a few tiny teeth.

"According to the scroll, the nomads only found babies in the entire city. No adults, no children, just babies. They gathered them up and took them back to Babbleonanonia."

Gazing at the amulet's strange-looking inscription, Kit said, "What happened to the adults? Were they captured? Killed?"

The archeologist shrugged. "No one knows."

"Boy, Becky would go gaga over this bauble," Baloo said as he walked up the Sea Duck's back hatch into the cargo hold.

"Many people have," Professor O'Bowens said, following the von Bruinwalds. "Ever since I found it, I've had thieves breathing down my neck." He glanced nervously around the airfield, still with the same creepy feeling that someone was watching him. "The sooner I get it to the museum, the better."

"We'll take off for Cape Suzette just as soon as Kit an' me unload this cargo."

"I'll help you." In his eagerness to get on the way, the professor laid the amulet down on Baloo's trunk o' junk, picked up a heavy crate, and stumbled backwards a few paces. Regaining his balance, he staggered towards the truck.

Baloo put Cassie on the trunk beside the amulet. "Now you sit tight. Daddy'll be back in a jiffy."

When her father and brother had left with their loads, Cassie immediately reached for the shiny amulet and slipped the chain around her neck. She giggled with delight at the clinking sound the chain made. After that amusement wore off, she stared, fascinated, at the amethyst.

Meanwhile, Trader Moe poked his head out from behind a nearby plane. Seeing the amulet around Cassie's neck, the alligator smiled broadly, revealing a mouthful of sharp, pointed teeth. "Dis is gonna be like takin' candy from a baby."

Just behind him, Rhino Goon - tall, dark, and stupid - craned his neck around the tail section to see what his diminutive boss was seeing. "Oh, boy! I like candy."

Ape Goon - tall, dark, and stupider - joined them at enthusiastically peering at the amulet. "Yeah, where's da candy?"

"Ya peach pits!" Trader Moe said in frustration, smacking them both across the snouts with his floppy brown hat. "Dere ain't no candy."

"But dere's a baby," Rhino Goon said slowly.

"Don't it got candy? You said..." Ape Goon added, hopeful of a sweet treat.

"No!" Trader Moe snapped. His temper was as short as his stature. "Da baby's got somethin' better'n candy."

"Gumdrops?" Ape Goon interjected.

"But wait." Rhino Goon pointed out, "Gumdrops are candy."

"Oh, yeah," Ape Goon chuckled stupidly, "I forgot."

"Will youse shut up already?"

The hulking goons cringed, completely cowed by their much smaller, yet smarter, boss.

Trader Moe ordered, "Get da necklace from da baby an' be careful wid it. A jewel dat size has gotta be worth a lotta moolah. I'll meet ya back at da plane."

"Right, boss," Rhino Goon said as Trader Moe marched across the airfield. "Get da necklace from da baby."

"No candy," Ape Goon added, a little sadly.

When the goons approached Cassie, she fixed her questioning eyes on them.

"Hand over da necklace, kid," said Rhino Goon, scowling down at her.

Ape Goon held out his hand. "Yeah, da necklace."

Thinking it was a game, Cassie slapped his palm and chirped, "Fibe!"

"She hit me!" Ape Goon cried, recoiling in fear.

"Tough girl, huh? Well, we'll just see about that." The rhino grabbed onto the necklace's chain and tried to slip it over her head. However, it wasn't as easy as he had thought it would be.

"No!" Cassie yelled at the top of her lungs, clutching the amulet with her tiny hands. "No, no, no, no, no, no, no!"

When she started to bawl, Rhino Goon dropped the necklace as if it were a hot potato.

Perplexed, Ape Goon scratched his pointed head. "Da boss wants da necklace, an' da baby wants da necklace. What do we do?"

"We'll take her to da boss. He'll know what to do." Without further ado, Rhino Goon scooped up crying Cassie and carried her off.

End of part 1