The Unbeatable Edward Cullen
"Our returning champion with an 8 day total $281,016, a doctor from Seattle, WA, please welcome Edward Cullen." The announcer's voice echoed throughout the studio.
"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of Jeopardy. Mr. Cullen, so good to see you again. Quite an impressive total you have amassed. Alright, let's begin the first round of Jeopardy." The host welcomed the audience.
I drank in the sight of him nodding at Alex from backstage. He was tall, chiseled and stoic. Unfortunately, he was also utterly arrogant. However, he was able to back his superiority with an amazing intellect. He was completely unmatched; no one ever came close to him. I knew when it was my turn at that challenger podium; he'd still be at the champion's stand. I both hoped for and feared that situation.
I watched as he methodically rang in answering seventy-five percent of the questions. The challengers looked excited every time they beat him to a question. He looked bored when one challenger managed to pass his score for the moment on a Daily Double. By final Jeopardy he had accrued more than double the amount of money of his nearest competitor, solidifying another victory.
He added another thirty-five thousand dollars to his spoils; hands were shook with Alex and the other victims. The lights went down and the studio audience filed out. I knew in a matter of an hour or so I'd be under those hot lights hoping for a chance to take down this man.
I was seated on a couch in the green room beside the other contender. He was a Professor from New York City. He appeared to not be intimidated by Edward or myself. Professor Underpants-in-a-twist spent most of the time on the phone with a teaching assistant at his college. When he wasn't hollering at that poor soul, he was scaring the life out of the people backstage.
His phone rang and he snatched it up, "Yes dear. No I'm sure I can take this young man down. The other competition? Well I'm fairly certain she's only here for looks."
He glared at his appalling statement. Only here for eye-candy am I? I couldn't wait to show him what this piece of ass could do. Did I really just call myself a piece of ass? I straightened my suit and smoothed out my hair. Yes, yes I am.
"Ok, Ms. Swan, Mr. Moriarty, we will be ready to shoot in about an hour. Good luck, you will need it." The young production assistant smiled at us and hurried back to set.
"That's Professor Moriarty young man!" Professor I'm-so-great shouted after him.
I rolled my eyes and glanced at my phone. I scrolled through the saved text messages. I smiled at the wishes of luck and ass-kicking to be done. I dialed my best friend and she picked up immediately.
"Bells! Are you rich? Did you win? What's going on? Is that fox Cullen still there?" Alice sputtered quickly.
"Alice! No, I'm not. I'm still waiting to shoot. I'm totally bored. And yes he is." I told her.
"Have you talked to him? He's so cute." Alice's voice was muffled, "No baby, I'm not gonna leave you for him. He's just nice to look at." I could hear her trying to placate her fiancée Jasper in the background.
"Nope, I haven't had a chance. He's so busy," I said sarcastically.
"Well seriously, hunt him down. You both live in the Northwest. Portland isn't that far from Seattle after all." I could hear Alice grinning through the phone.
"Alice, I'm fairly certain he's adjusted to life in Hollywood. I somehow doubt he can leave his screaming fans behind. I mean literal screaming. There are always girls waiting and stalking like he's a celebrity. It's disgusting." I made a face.
"Disgusting is a bit harsh, isn't it?" I heard a cool voice from behind me.
I whirled around to find Edward Cullen looking at me with a slight smirk on his face. If the smirk wasn't so damned sexy, I would have smacked him for eavesdropping.
"Alice, I have to call you later. Yeah, yeah, thanks." I shut off my phone and stuffed it in my purse.
He brushed past me and grabbed a handful of grapes. He ate them silently as he circled around me. I blushed as I felt eyes appraising my appearance. Professor Too-good-for-the-rest-of-us sighed and walked into the hallway, phone glued to his ear.
"I must say, you are the most beautiful competition I've had. I'm disappointed in the producers. They really think I'll be distracted by beauty?" He smiled.
I stood with my jaw agape. This Adonis of a man thought I was beautiful. But more importantly, he thought it was just a ploy to distract him. It didn't even breach his thick and beautiful head that I could be intelligent.
"I assure you I'm here to win." I said in a steely voice.
"I've got no doubt about that, gorgeous. But I can assure you that everyone has said that to me. Including Mr. What's-his-name out there, he's quite sure his age and our youth equal victory for him." Edward said calmly.
"Well, Mr. Cullen, I appreciate the heads up. I hope you won't be too disappointed to end your streak today." I smiled sweetly.
He opened his mouth to say something else, but closed it quickly. He gave me a curt nod and strode out the door.
"Ms. Swan, you are needed in make-up." A PA informed me.
***
We were lined up backstage waiting for the theme music to begin. As it rolled throughout the studio the announcer called out Professor-self-important first. He strode out to his podium like he had a giant stick shoved up his rear. I stifled a giggle and straightened up as the PA gave me a gentle nudge indicating it was time for me to go.
Don't trip, don't fall, don't stumble, and don't blush. Smile confidently; you made it to the podium. Don't blush. Dammit Bella, you blushed.
Edward was called out last with his impressive streak and winnings announced for the audience. He smiled handsomely at the camera and turned to applaud for Alex. As the camera focus on Mr. Trebek Edward glanced sideways at me and gave me a crooked smile. I felt my heart skip a beat. No, I would not be seduced by his smile.
Victory, Bella. Destruction of this mouth-watering man, and a victory dance.
I smiled innocently back then turned my focus on. It was time to crush him completely. I stole one more glance at him and found he was focused as well.
Ok, seriously this time I'll be focused.
The game board populated with dollar amounts and I waited impatiently for the categories.
"And the categories are: Women's Groups, Footwear, Film Titles in Foreign Lands, Filling Foods, The Wizard and of "Oz" each answer will contain the letters O-Z. Mr. Cullen you are our champion, you make the first selection."
"I will take Women's Groups for $200, Alex." He smiled.
"Constitution Hall in Washington, D.C. is part of a 3-building complex owned & operated by this lineage society."
I pressed my buzzer quickly but the Professor beat me there. "What are the National Archives?"
I snorted quietly at his incorrect answer and prepared to buzz. I saw Edward's podium light up out of the corner of my eye. "What is the Daughter's of the American Revolution?"
"Correct."
"I'll take Women's Groups for $400." Edward said.
"In the 1980s this organization created the Daisies for young ladies 5 years old or in kindergarten"
"What is the Girl Scouts?" I said after getting in before Edward.
"Correct, Isabella."
"Alex, I'll take Film Titles in Foreign Lands for $200." I said politely.
"In Romania, this Nicole Kidman film was called "What New Magic Tricks My Wife Did"
"What is Bewitched?" Edward answered coolly.
It went on like this until the commercial break. At the commercial Edward and I were tied and the Professor was in the lead by $400. It was a very close match.
"It appears I under-estimated you. The Professor there doesn't stand a chance, but you…I'm wary of and intrigued by…" Edward whispered to me.
I raised my eyebrow to him and prepared to give a haughty response, but was cut off by the interview section of the show. Alex was standing in front of the Professor with notes in hand.
"Professor Jonas Moriarty is from New York…" I tuned out the Professor's entitled responses and waited anxiously for my turn.
"Isabella Swan is an English Lit teacher in Portland, Oregon. Ms. Swan, I understand you have an interesting hobby." He prompted, it was all so scripted.
"Yes, Alex. I am an avid motorcycle fan. A few years ago my friend and I rebuilt a couple of old bikes and since then I've spent a lot of time traveling the West Coast." I told him, like he didn't already know. He laughed appreciatively at the thought of my tiny form tooling down the highway.
He turned to Edward, "So, Mr. Cullen, you've become quite a fixture here. You've spent many days in Los Angeles now. What is the most exciting thing you've seen?"
I knew Edwards scripted answer. He had met Steven Spielberg a couple days before and apparently it had made an impression.
"Well Alex, I met the most intriguing person recently. She's quite lovely." My eyes darted to him; he didn't even glance at me.
"When did you meet her, Edward?" Alex asked in a surprised voice, since the Spielberg story was on his card.
"Today, just about an hour ago. She's breathtaking." He smiled. I felt my cheeks heat up in embarrassment.
"Well, she's quite the lucky girl then, isn't she? Let's continue this first round of play. Ms. Swan I believe it is your choice."
Lucky girl my ass. Damn smooth talker, trying to throw me off my game. I'll show him…
"Isabella? Your selection." Alex said.
"I'll take Film Titles for $800." The Daily Double popped up and my breath hitched and I wagered it all.
"Switzerland messed with this Adam Sandler title, calling it "For Your Hair Only"; Spain had a "License to Comb""
I chewed on my lower lip. Ugh, Adam Sandler, not exactly my favorite. Hair, hair, hair, what movie was about hair? I frowned to myself in frustration.
"What is, Don't Mess With The Zohan?" I said meekly, fearing losing all my money.
"Correct!"
I breathed a heavy sigh of relief as Alex told me my new total. I smiled and chose my next clue. Edward quickly caught up to me and passed me even with my daily double victory. Professor got answers here and there, but it was clear after round one this was race between Edward and me.
***
Double Jeopardy began after a short break. We were able to go backstage and get some water and take a rest from the bright lights. Edward sat silently across from me, studying me with intensity. I didn't give him the satisfaction of eye contact, but I could feel his gaze. The Professor stewed and whined in his seat.
"Already kids, round two. Let's go." The PA brought us back to the set.
We stood at our podiums and listened to Alex read off the new categories, "Math-pourri, Rolling Stone's Most Annoying Songs, Written Behind Bars, State Facts, Its A Gas and "RR" Crossing. Jonas you will select first."
"I'll take RR Crossing for $400." He stated.
"A 2-seated pleasure carriage, with or without "the fringe on top""
I buzzed quickly, knowing the fringe was a reference to a favorite musical of mine. "What is a surrey?"
"Correct."
"Rolling Stone for $1000, please."
"This Sisqo song about a piece of clothing mentioned another song on the list, "Livin' La Vida Loca""
Edward buzzed quickly, gave me a sly look and said, "What is The Thong Song?"
"Correct, Edward."
It went on like this for the whole round. We bounced back and forth answering Alex, completely shutting out Professor Too-slow. By the end of the round I had barely edged out Edward on the final clue, I had $18,600. Edward was at $16,200 and Professor brought up the rear with $7,000.
"The final Jeopardy category is Authors' Quotations."
After the category was read I carefully considered my wager. If he bet it all he'd have $32,400. To ensure that I beat him I'd have to wager $13,801. If I got it wrong, it was all over. I stressed out about this. Maybe he would wager low and not try to double it all, banking on my colossal failure and he wouldn't have to risk it all. I thought of the Professor for a moment, if we both bet the farm and were wrong that sniveling man could take it all.
I took a deep breath and made my wager in my mind.
***
"The final Jeopardy clue is, "I had no idea of originating an American flapper... I simply took girls whom I knew very well" & "used them for my heroines""
I chewed on my lower lip and considered this. A writer from the age of flappers, that used them as heroes? I honestly wasn't sure right off the bat. I could hear the men around me scrawling answers. Did they know, or were they guessing? I was sure Edward knew. He was so confident. I quickly jotted an appropriate and hopefully correct answer and waited for the music to end.
Alex checked with the Professor first. He had answered F. Scott Fitzgerald. Alex indicated the answer was indeed correct and viewed his wager. He'd made a safe wager of only $100. He probably hoped Edward and I would be wrong and knock each other out.
The Professor was smug with happiness. However, this was short-lived. Edward, of course, had gotten the correct answer. I could feel panic building in my chest as they revealed his wager. He had bet it all, giving him a final total of $32,400.
My heart pounded so heavy in my ears I could barely hear Alex.
"It all comes down to this. Isabella, you have been a worthy competitor for Edward and the only person to ever have more than him in the final round. Let's see your answer."
My blue screen revealed my answer, F. Scott Fitzgerald. I felt a sly smile creep across my face.
"Also correct, now the all important wager."
My wager of $13,801 popped up on the screen and my grand total changed over to $32,401.
"Congratulations to our new Jeopardy Champion, Isabella Swan. Edward, I'm sure we'll be seeing you again in the Tournament of Champions."
My heart swelled with pride. I had taken down the unbeatable Edward Cullen. I glanced over at him; he wiped the look of shock off his face and walked over to me.
"That's what I get for under-estimating a beautiful woman. Never again." He purred in my ear as he shook my hand. He gave me a fleeting look and sauntered back to the green room.
That's right, I thought, never under-estimate a determined and intelligent woman, beauty hasn't anything to do with it.