The Invitation (The Office Fan Fiction)
By Tucker Hayford
I
It's been almost eleven months since Dwight spontaneously proposed to his beloved Angela on the side of the highway. Every day since has been filled with joy, especially with young Philip, who Dwight suspected, correctly, was his son at birth. Angela has taken very nicely to her new life on Schrute Farms, where she spends her free time keeping Dwight in line and tending the beets together. Dwight's cousin, Mose, still lives in the upstairs of their rather large farm-house on their exceptionally large estate. Angela has tried tirelessly to get Mose to move out, as she fears that he is mentally unstable and unfit to be around Philip. Dwight, however, has spent his whole life with cousin Mose and couldn't live without his mischief any more than he could live without his new family.
"D, I caught Mose spying on me while I was bathing this morning," Angela said in a panic. "He just has to go!" she asserted.
"Oh, but Monkey, I'm sure he was just playing some sort of prank. You know by now that Mose has no interest in sex. Nobody taught him!" said Dwight, trying to ease his fiancés concerns. "I'll talk to him."
"You always say that. D, I agreed to marry you, not the two of you."
"Speaking of that, the wedding is coming up in a few months and we haven't even figured out what type of livestock we want yet…"
If it hadn't been for the emotional conversation between Jim and Dwight at the office last year, where Jim told Dwight to follow his heart no matter how scary that can be, the picture-perfect family that is Dwight, Angela, and Philip may not have been a picture at all. With that said, it would only be logical for Dwight to be heavily considering Jim for the position of "bestest mensch", or best man.
The next morning, Monday morning, Dwight and Angela pulled into the office together as usual but it was clear that something was bothering Dwight. His face, shaped rather square, seemed blank.
"What's the matter with you?" asked Angela, wearing a knee-length, black skirt with a white-collared shirt.
"Nothing," Dwight responded.
"You've been so down at work lately," Angela said, walking into their rather boring-looking piece of Scranton Business Park. Dunder Mifflin Paper Company had remained relatively unchanged in the almost ten years they had worked there. It's a big, gray box with windows- nothing special. They walked a respectable arms-length away from each other. Always proper and always professional.
"It's really not the same here without Michael," he said admittingly. "I know it's been so long since he left, but I really wish he was here for the wedding."
"Not this again. Michael was a vulgar man!" she said. She was never a big fan of Michael, with his willy-nilly attitude and inappropriate jokes.
"Sure, but imagine all of your cats left you forever. How would you feel?"
"How dare you say that!" she yelled, as the doors to the elevator opened and the two of them walked into their office for another day at work.
Later after a long day of work, Dwight and Angela sat out on the porch drinking beet juice with Mose somewhere unknown, but undoubtedly close by. They decided that this would be the day they sorted through the RSVP's a final time and made a seating arrangement. Their wedding, set to take place right on Schrute Farms, would be one with Pennsylvania Dutch traditions and including all their friends from the office.
"Everyone that we sent invitations to responded except for Michael," Dwight said, staring out into the field on his handmade rocking chair.
"Oh, D. I know it must be tough, but he's probably very busy out in Colorado. I imagine it would be hard to just leave for four days to come to all the way here".
"I guess. I don't know, I just always thought we'd would be there for the bigger moments in each other's lives," he admitted. "I always thought that little Philip would get to look up to Michael, as an uncle or something".
"Yeah, I'm sorry he's missing out," Angela whispered sarcastically under her breath.
"What was that?" Dwight asked.
"Nothing. Why don't you just call Michael?"
"Well, I don't want to bother him if he doesn't want to come. I just wanted to see him again, that's all".
"There's still some time, D," she said in a comforting way. "You never know".
II
About two thousand miles west was where Michael had moved with his fiancé Holly. After being Michael's "Assistant to the Regional Manager" for many years, they had grown extremely close so when Michael and Holly left for Colorado, Dwight acted tough but was clearly crushed. By the time that they had lived in Colorado for only three years, the two of them had two children and were now expecting another one.
Holly is now almost nine months pregnant and Michael spends whatever time he has away from work making sure she is taken care of. Michael works at a comedy club, where he's not allowed to perform anymore due to telling way too many "that's what she said" jokes. He just sells tickets but he gets to see shows for free which is what keeps him around. One day at work, around four in the afternoon, he had received three missed calls from Holly and he started to panic. He called her back.
"Hello?" Holly answered.
"Is everything okay? Michael interrupted. "Is it time, am I going to be a dad?".
"Michael, you're already a dad. How many times do I have to tell you? And no, it's not time. But I was going through the pile of mail on your desk at home and I found a letter".
"Oh no . Holly I swear it was many years ago, and it was before I knew that multiple condoms at a time don't actually protect-"
"Michael, my god no. Never mind I'll just tell-"
"Is it the mob?" he followed up, really concerned.
"No, Michael this is so hard-"
"That's what she said," he promptly responded.
Holly remained silent, not giving Michael the satisfaction of a laugh like she usually did.
"Holly?" he inquired. "Did the phone cut out?"
"The letter is from Dwight, Michael".
"Dwight? Really? What does it say?" he sighed of relief, but was also confused as to why Dwight, who he hadn't seen or talked to in a year was sending him a letter. He wondered if Dwight remembered that they both had cell phones, or if maybe he had finally fully rooted himself into his family's Amish heritage and could now only communicate by means of fountain pen and paper far inferior to Dunder Mifflin's.
"I didn't open it. That's illegal" she responded nervously.
"I don't think it counts when you're married".
"Are you sure-" she hesitated. "I think I just had a contraction".
"Really!" he yelled, as everyone at the comedy club jumped.
"No" she chuckled. "I think it was probably just my water breaking".
"Oh my god. Threat level midnight! I'm going to be a dad!" He yelled to everyone in the club. "I'll come get you and we'll go to the hospital," he added.
"Michael, you have to stop falling for that. That's the third time this week," she laughed.
"You are so good Holly Flax. So good".
"Anyways," she said, unfolding the letter from Dwight, "it says that we are 'cordially invited to the ceremony of Dwight and Angela's marriage'".
"Get out of here!" he yelled, this time prompting a young woman to tell him to shut up from across the room. "Sorry Miss," he said to the young woman. "When's the wedding?" turning back into the speaker of his cell phone.
"It says here that it's in two weeks," she said, her voice sounding more and more confused with each word she spoke. "That can't be right. Michael how long has this been sitting on your desk?" she asked and eagerly awaited his answer.
"Oh, I don't know, I just throw mail on the desk and sort of forget about it," he said before a brief pause. "Let it sort itself out, you know?" he added.
"Michael, darling, you can't just do that! That's very bad…"
It's hard to imagine how Michael was able to keep himself alive for the nearly forty-five years of his life prior to Holly. It wasn't that he couldn't clean, cook or generally take care of himself, it was more of deep naivety and innocence that provoked a lot of his mistakes, to put them nicely. Now that Holly was so far into her pregnancy, Michael had a tough decision to make.
"I have to go but we'll talk more about this tonight," Michael concluded.
They hung up and Michael finished up his shift at the club, while Holly sat on the couch for the next few hours, as she didn't have the energy to do too much more. Around eight o'clock, Michael walked into the door to find a very stressed out Holly.
"What's the matter?" Michael asked.
"I'm nervous. What if you go to Pennsylvania for the wedding and I have the baby while you're gone?" she said very quickly. "Who will watch the kids? My parents are too sick. I don't know if I can do this without you here".
"Hey, now, come on. I never even said I was going to go!" he responded.
"Oh, Michael, come on. You should go. It's Dwight'.
"Yeah sure, but that's not my life anymore. This is. Here, with you".
"You're going to that wedding," she said, beginning to smirk. "I'm playing with you. Everything will be fine. I already booked your plane ticket".
III
On the morning of Dwight and Angela's wedding, they woke up excited to share their love with all their closest friends and family. They needed the whole day to prepare so they let Mose take Philip to go set up the yard for the wedding. Dwight poured two tall glasses of beet juice for them and they walked back out on to the porch to plan out the day.
"Make sure you drink up. Beet juice is sure to eradicate any traces of nerves one may have on a big day like this," he said, pushing her glass closer to her on the table.
"That can't be right," she said. "Anyways, here's a list of things you need to do before two. I'll meet you back here then and we'll get the show on the road".
"I'm so excited".
Little did anyone else know, earlier that morning before Dwight or Angela even woke up, Michael boarded a plane to fly to Pennsylvania and surprise everyone. He had called Jim earlier in the week to tell him, however, and the two of them met at the airport for the first time in almost three years. They exchanged stories for almost two hours at lunch, telling each other about how much each of their children had grown up and how little Dwight had changed. Yeah, they mostly talked about Dwight and about how happy he was to have his own family.
"Dwight doesn't know I'm here, does he?" Michael asked.
"Nope. I've only told Pam and Dwight still has no clue".
"Ah, I can't wait to see the look on his weird little face," Michael said, hitting his hand on the table in excitement. "So, I'm sleeping at your place for the three nights, right?"
"Uh, Michael, I think that might be too long-"
"That's what she said!" he yelled.
Jim laughed and looked into the camera the way that he always had before. They way that they were talking, it seemed like Michael had never left. Their friendship never skipped a beat.
"Alright let's get out of here and go see the rest of the gang, what do you say?" Jim asked, throwing down some cash down on the table and standing up.
"Yeah, let's go".
The two of them got into Jim's car and drove to Schrute Farms. Michael managed to squeeze in five more that's-what-she-said jokes on the ride. They pulled in and gave Mose the keys, who for some reason, was trusted as the valet for the event. Michael then diverged from Jim and Pam, who met them there, and stuck around back where he would wait for a good time to go in. Jim then went in to the room where Dwight was getting ready, as he was still his best man. Jim then told Dwight that he could not be there for him as his best man, and when Dwight wondered why not, Jim simply looked right behind Dwight. Jim's gaze made Dwight turn around, where he would find Michael standing in the door way. Jim was handing over the position of best man over to Michael, who was so happy to see Dwight.
"I can't believe you came," Dwight said as if he was in a trance.
"That's what she said," Michael responded. The two then embraced and laughed for a while about the crazy nonsense they used to get into
"Are you nervous?" Michael asked.
"No way. Schrute's don't get nervous," Dwight said confidently. "It's one of many traits that make us a superior species".
"Of course, well I am just so, so happy to see you two finally together".
"Thanks Michael. Where is Holly?"
"She couldn't make it"
"How come?"
"Well, she's actually nine months pregnant with our third child".
"Get out of town!" Dwight yelled, pushing Michael aggressively out of joy and disbelief.
"No joke. I'll show you all of the pictures after the wedding, but I think it's time for you get out there mister"
"Not without you, best man," Dwight said, putting his hand on Michael's shoulder and walking out of the door.
The wedding went off without a hitch. All the weird traditions that were involved proved successful and Dwight and Angela were happily pronounced man and wife. Everyone moved to the reception, where most people danced and drank, and Michael and Pam sat at their table scrolling through Michael's photos of his kids. It was right then that his phone rang. The screen read Holly.
"Holly?" Michael answered. "Is everything okay?"
"Well, actually".
"What is it?" Michael said anxiously.
"My water actually did break".
"Yeah right. You told me to stop falling for that".
"No, Michael. It actually did. I'm going to go to the hospital now".
"No, no, no. This isn't happening," Michael said, rushing to his car. "Just, um, hold it in. I'm on my way to the airport now".
"Michael, there's way you'll make it here in time," she said. "Stay there I'll be fine".
"No way Holly. If you think I am going to miss the moment that I become a dad, then you are very wrong".
Michael hung up the phone and instantly made eye contact with Pam from the parking lot. She nodded and gestured for him to go, which he decided to do. He grabbed Jim's keys and took their car to the airport, where he bought a ticket for the first plane back to Colorado.