Seiken Survivor!
...Yeah..we're screwed..
(We see that the location is the Desert of Scorching Heat, and we also see the host, Kurai [tee hee, me!] standing out in the middle of the site with the cast members around her)
Kurai: Hi everyone! Welcome to Seiken Survivor, where you see your favorite SD3 characters in the middle of the Navarrian Desert, striving to live and win one million luc! Before we meet the cast, maybe I should explain why we're out here in the desert. Well, we WERE going to do this on the Island of Oblivion.however.**glares at Bigieu**
Bigieu: Ah, well.heh.
Kurai: **sigh** THIS idiot blew up the island.
*~*~*Flashback*~*~*
(The Island of Oblivion is teeming with staff members for the show, and in the distance we see Navarre's airship moving in)
Bigieu: Hahaha! Die!
(Airship proceeds to blow up the island)
*~*~*End of Flashback*~*~*
Bigieu: I seriously thought those dorks **nods over to Mana Heroes** were on the island!
Kurai: Well, they weren't, were they?!? And now we're out here in the desert. And for blowing up the island, you don't get to participate! **drags out catapult**
Bigieu: !!!
Kurai: **shoves Bigieu in and catapults her far, far away so she smacks into a mountain in Rolante and splatters like a bug** There. Okay now, let's meet the cast! **walks over to cast** First, the strong, bold, and valiant swordsman from Forcena, it's Duran!!
Duran: **brandishes sword artfully then sheathes it** Hidiho!
Kurai: May I make note to the viewers that the cast was allowed to bring one weapon with them to the desert. So, brought your sword?
Duran: **shrug** It's the only thing I use.
Kurai: Ooohh yeeahh. . Next, we have the courageous and beautiful Princess of Rolante, Lise!
Lise: **twirls spear, throws it up in the air, catches it** Hello.
Kurai: What do you think your chances are of surviving?
Lise: Pretty good. I am, after all, an amazoness.
Kurai: Yeah yeah, don't brag. Next, we have the annoyingly cute half-elf, Carlie!
Carlie: **swings flail in the air, hits herself** Ow! Carlie hurt!
Kurai: .heh.she doesn't stand a chance.**ahem** Anyway! Now we have the strong, powerful yet modest Beastman, Kevin!
Kevin: **does a few kicks and punches, then a flip** Hi.
Kurai: Hi Kevin! Are you looking forward towards spending your time here with your friends and enemies?
Kevin: Enemies?
Kurai: Yeah! **points over to several of the SD3 villains, rocking back and forth on their toes and fidgeting, waiting to be introduced**
Kevin: Oh. Uh.yeah?
Kurai: Good boy! Next we have the handsome thief right from these sands, Hawk!
Hawk: **twirls knives and then sheathes them** Howdy.
Kurai: You must be used to all of this, especially since you're from here.
Hawk: Yeah, no problem! **winks and smiles at the camera charmingly**
Kurai: ..Damn..Uh.now, we have the lovely yet no-talent Princess of Altena, Angela!
Angela: What do you mean no talent? And why was I picked last?!?
Kurai: One, you can't use magic. Two, you're a stupid girlie princess with ADD and I hate you. (Cheers from Koren, The Darkshine Knight, and Duran in the background)
Angela: ..oh.
Kurai: Yeah, so shut up. Now, let's meet the darker side of SD3, the villains! **walks over to villains** We have six of these guys.
Heath: No you don't! You killed Bigieu!
Kurai: o.O Oh yeah.uh.then I'll be a cast member!
Everyone: WHAT?!?
Kurai: Shut up or I'll delete you from this story!
Everyone: .
Kurai: Good. Anyway, we have SIX people, including me, for the villains. Let's meet out first, the maniac psychopath, Deathjester!
Deathjester: **swings scythe around, plants it into the ground** Hey.
Kurai: I notice that the Masked Mage isn't here, do you know why?
Deathjester: He went to Vegas.
Darkshine Knight: .and the Dragon Emperor is reading trashy romance novels.
Jagan: .and Archdemon is watching a soap opera marathon and didn't want to come.
Kurai: Wow.that was random.Well, next we have the converted magician Heath!
Heath: **plays with Holy Ball, dissipates it** Hi!
Kurai: Well, aren't we perky!
Heath: Coffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffee!
Kurai: Wow.he's almost as bad as I am (cue music: Dun dun duuunnnnn) **looks around for where the music could've come from** ..Yeah.now, we have the mysterious blade master, the Darkshine Knight!
Darkshine Knight: **swings sword artfully like Duran, and plants it into the ground** Hello there.
Kurai: **scans Darkshine** Are you ready to spend a whole lotta time here in the desert wearing that?
Darkshine Knight: For 1 million luc I will!
Kurai: Ah.it's always the money.Well, now we have the world's most powerful Wizard from Altena, Koren!
Koren: **tosses a few fireballs back and forth between his fingers and extinguishes them** Hello!
Kurai: **almost drooling** You're going to use your magic?
Koren: Actually, no. I brought something else along! **pulls out registered AK-47**
Kurai: !!!!! Whoa! Ah.well.now we have my new partner and vampire from the underworld, Jagan!
Jagan: **uses psychic power to lift a fairly large boulder up and smacks it into Angela. We here her scream and curse in the background** Heeelloooo!
Kurai: Hey, looks like your psychic power will help out a lot! Hehehe.glad I have him as a partner! Well, it looks like we'll have to split up into our camps now, huh?
Duran: Yeah, how does that work?
Kurai: A small twist my little friend.the people corresponding to your quest will be in your camp, here's the list:
Camp Rabite: Heath, Deathjester, Carlie, Kevin Camp Harpy: Duran, Koren, Darkshine Knight, Angela Camp Myconnid: Hawk, Lise, Jagan, Kurai
Angela: WHAT? NO WAY! I am NOT camping with three guys!
Duran: **turns to Kurai** You're right, she is girlie.
Angela: I HEARD THAT!
Kurai: Ah well, not my problem! Mwahaha! Good luck! Everyone, to your camps!
(Everyone heads to his or her camps as the sun sets.)
(That evening)
[Camp Rabite]
Carlie: **clinging to Heath's leg** Heathie! I missed you Heathie!
Heath: Oh GODS! Get her off!!!
Kevin: Me try! **has to use all of his strength to pull Carlie off and ties her to a tree** There!
Heath: Why, thank you Kevin.
Kevin: No prob!
Deathjester: Let's go hunting for dinner.
Kevin: Kay!
(Deathjester, Kevin, and Heath all go hunting)
Carlie: Carlie.sad.
[Camp Harpy]
Duran: **is trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks together**
Angela: Give it up! You're never going to do it you moron.
Duran: Hey! I'm sick of you making crude jokes at me!
Koren: Can you blame her? Everyone else does the same to her.
Duran: Yeah, well, that's because she deserves it.
Angela: Like hell I do!
Darkshine Knight: Could you guys be nice and shut up? I'm trying to sleep.
Duran: It's barely past dark.
Koren: That's Darkshine for you. He'll go to sleep early and then wake up at the crack of dawn and bug the sh** out of everyone.
Duran: Seems like Carlie.**finally gets fire started** Huh? Yayhoo!
Angela: Oh what? You want a medal now?
Duran: Grr..
Koren: This is pitiful.let's get something to eat.
Duran: Yes, please, anything!
(Duran and Koren leave)
Angela: Hmph! I don't believe this! (dramatic/patriotic music cues in) I am a Princess! I should not be treated like this! **stands up, places hand over heart** I am of royal blood, and they have absolutely no right to do this to me! Am I right Darkshine?
Darkshine Knight: .
Angela: This is me when I'm proud! This is me when I'm angry! This is-
Darkshine Knight: -me not caring.
Angela: ..
[Camp Myconnid]
(Everyone is whistling Colonel Bogey and helping make dinner)
Hawk: Huh.hey.um, Jagan, what do we do now?
Jagan: Add the herbs.
Hawk: Oh right!
Kurai: I never knew you knew how to cook so well Jagan!
Jagan: It's always been a hobby of mine.
Lise: I can't cook for anything, I'm lousy at that.
Hawk: I'll say.
Lise: What?!? What was that?!?
Hawk: You burned everything whenever we tried to make something out in the wild. You were hopeless.
Lise: Hmph.
Hawk: That's what royalty gets you, a body of worthlessness.
Lise: Yeah, well, you're what thievery does to a person; makes them an anarchist!
Hawk: I am NOT!
Kurai: Gods, shut up you two.
Jagan: Yeah, if we're going to spend our time here, might as well make it as pleasant as can be.
Lise and Hawk: All right.
Kurai: **to camera** Well, it's obvious that things are starting off a little rocky for everyone.tune into next weeks episode to find out what happens next! This is Kurai, wishing you a good-LISE! YOURE BURNING IT! AHH!!
(Scenes from the next Seiken Survivor)
Harmless Rabite: Chirp?
Duran: Aww.it got lost all the way out here! C'mere little thing.
Harmless Rabite: Chirp.**hopes closer to Duran**
Duran: That's right.that's right.NOW KOREN!
Koren: **war cry** DIE!! **shoots the Rabite full of holes with AK-47**
(Screen fades into black and we hear Duran and Koren cheer in the background)
See ya next time!
...Yeah..we're screwed..
(We see that the location is the Desert of Scorching Heat, and we also see the host, Kurai [tee hee, me!] standing out in the middle of the site with the cast members around her)
Kurai: Hi everyone! Welcome to Seiken Survivor, where you see your favorite SD3 characters in the middle of the Navarrian Desert, striving to live and win one million luc! Before we meet the cast, maybe I should explain why we're out here in the desert. Well, we WERE going to do this on the Island of Oblivion.however.**glares at Bigieu**
Bigieu: Ah, well.heh.
Kurai: **sigh** THIS idiot blew up the island.
*~*~*Flashback*~*~*
(The Island of Oblivion is teeming with staff members for the show, and in the distance we see Navarre's airship moving in)
Bigieu: Hahaha! Die!
(Airship proceeds to blow up the island)
*~*~*End of Flashback*~*~*
Bigieu: I seriously thought those dorks **nods over to Mana Heroes** were on the island!
Kurai: Well, they weren't, were they?!? And now we're out here in the desert. And for blowing up the island, you don't get to participate! **drags out catapult**
Bigieu: !!!
Kurai: **shoves Bigieu in and catapults her far, far away so she smacks into a mountain in Rolante and splatters like a bug** There. Okay now, let's meet the cast! **walks over to cast** First, the strong, bold, and valiant swordsman from Forcena, it's Duran!!
Duran: **brandishes sword artfully then sheathes it** Hidiho!
Kurai: May I make note to the viewers that the cast was allowed to bring one weapon with them to the desert. So, brought your sword?
Duran: **shrug** It's the only thing I use.
Kurai: Ooohh yeeahh. . Next, we have the courageous and beautiful Princess of Rolante, Lise!
Lise: **twirls spear, throws it up in the air, catches it** Hello.
Kurai: What do you think your chances are of surviving?
Lise: Pretty good. I am, after all, an amazoness.
Kurai: Yeah yeah, don't brag. Next, we have the annoyingly cute half-elf, Carlie!
Carlie: **swings flail in the air, hits herself** Ow! Carlie hurt!
Kurai: .heh.she doesn't stand a chance.**ahem** Anyway! Now we have the strong, powerful yet modest Beastman, Kevin!
Kevin: **does a few kicks and punches, then a flip** Hi.
Kurai: Hi Kevin! Are you looking forward towards spending your time here with your friends and enemies?
Kevin: Enemies?
Kurai: Yeah! **points over to several of the SD3 villains, rocking back and forth on their toes and fidgeting, waiting to be introduced**
Kevin: Oh. Uh.yeah?
Kurai: Good boy! Next we have the handsome thief right from these sands, Hawk!
Hawk: **twirls knives and then sheathes them** Howdy.
Kurai: You must be used to all of this, especially since you're from here.
Hawk: Yeah, no problem! **winks and smiles at the camera charmingly**
Kurai: ..Damn..Uh.now, we have the lovely yet no-talent Princess of Altena, Angela!
Angela: What do you mean no talent? And why was I picked last?!?
Kurai: One, you can't use magic. Two, you're a stupid girlie princess with ADD and I hate you. (Cheers from Koren, The Darkshine Knight, and Duran in the background)
Angela: ..oh.
Kurai: Yeah, so shut up. Now, let's meet the darker side of SD3, the villains! **walks over to villains** We have six of these guys.
Heath: No you don't! You killed Bigieu!
Kurai: o.O Oh yeah.uh.then I'll be a cast member!
Everyone: WHAT?!?
Kurai: Shut up or I'll delete you from this story!
Everyone: .
Kurai: Good. Anyway, we have SIX people, including me, for the villains. Let's meet out first, the maniac psychopath, Deathjester!
Deathjester: **swings scythe around, plants it into the ground** Hey.
Kurai: I notice that the Masked Mage isn't here, do you know why?
Deathjester: He went to Vegas.
Darkshine Knight: .and the Dragon Emperor is reading trashy romance novels.
Jagan: .and Archdemon is watching a soap opera marathon and didn't want to come.
Kurai: Wow.that was random.Well, next we have the converted magician Heath!
Heath: **plays with Holy Ball, dissipates it** Hi!
Kurai: Well, aren't we perky!
Heath: Coffeecoffeecoffeecoffeecoffee!
Kurai: Wow.he's almost as bad as I am (cue music: Dun dun duuunnnnn) **looks around for where the music could've come from** ..Yeah.now, we have the mysterious blade master, the Darkshine Knight!
Darkshine Knight: **swings sword artfully like Duran, and plants it into the ground** Hello there.
Kurai: **scans Darkshine** Are you ready to spend a whole lotta time here in the desert wearing that?
Darkshine Knight: For 1 million luc I will!
Kurai: Ah.it's always the money.Well, now we have the world's most powerful Wizard from Altena, Koren!
Koren: **tosses a few fireballs back and forth between his fingers and extinguishes them** Hello!
Kurai: **almost drooling** You're going to use your magic?
Koren: Actually, no. I brought something else along! **pulls out registered AK-47**
Kurai: !!!!! Whoa! Ah.well.now we have my new partner and vampire from the underworld, Jagan!
Jagan: **uses psychic power to lift a fairly large boulder up and smacks it into Angela. We here her scream and curse in the background** Heeelloooo!
Kurai: Hey, looks like your psychic power will help out a lot! Hehehe.glad I have him as a partner! Well, it looks like we'll have to split up into our camps now, huh?
Duran: Yeah, how does that work?
Kurai: A small twist my little friend.the people corresponding to your quest will be in your camp, here's the list:
Camp Rabite: Heath, Deathjester, Carlie, Kevin Camp Harpy: Duran, Koren, Darkshine Knight, Angela Camp Myconnid: Hawk, Lise, Jagan, Kurai
Angela: WHAT? NO WAY! I am NOT camping with three guys!
Duran: **turns to Kurai** You're right, she is girlie.
Angela: I HEARD THAT!
Kurai: Ah well, not my problem! Mwahaha! Good luck! Everyone, to your camps!
(Everyone heads to his or her camps as the sun sets.)
(That evening)
[Camp Rabite]
Carlie: **clinging to Heath's leg** Heathie! I missed you Heathie!
Heath: Oh GODS! Get her off!!!
Kevin: Me try! **has to use all of his strength to pull Carlie off and ties her to a tree** There!
Heath: Why, thank you Kevin.
Kevin: No prob!
Deathjester: Let's go hunting for dinner.
Kevin: Kay!
(Deathjester, Kevin, and Heath all go hunting)
Carlie: Carlie.sad.
[Camp Harpy]
Duran: **is trying to start a fire by rubbing two sticks together**
Angela: Give it up! You're never going to do it you moron.
Duran: Hey! I'm sick of you making crude jokes at me!
Koren: Can you blame her? Everyone else does the same to her.
Duran: Yeah, well, that's because she deserves it.
Angela: Like hell I do!
Darkshine Knight: Could you guys be nice and shut up? I'm trying to sleep.
Duran: It's barely past dark.
Koren: That's Darkshine for you. He'll go to sleep early and then wake up at the crack of dawn and bug the sh** out of everyone.
Duran: Seems like Carlie.**finally gets fire started** Huh? Yayhoo!
Angela: Oh what? You want a medal now?
Duran: Grr..
Koren: This is pitiful.let's get something to eat.
Duran: Yes, please, anything!
(Duran and Koren leave)
Angela: Hmph! I don't believe this! (dramatic/patriotic music cues in) I am a Princess! I should not be treated like this! **stands up, places hand over heart** I am of royal blood, and they have absolutely no right to do this to me! Am I right Darkshine?
Darkshine Knight: .
Angela: This is me when I'm proud! This is me when I'm angry! This is-
Darkshine Knight: -me not caring.
Angela: ..
[Camp Myconnid]
(Everyone is whistling Colonel Bogey and helping make dinner)
Hawk: Huh.hey.um, Jagan, what do we do now?
Jagan: Add the herbs.
Hawk: Oh right!
Kurai: I never knew you knew how to cook so well Jagan!
Jagan: It's always been a hobby of mine.
Lise: I can't cook for anything, I'm lousy at that.
Hawk: I'll say.
Lise: What?!? What was that?!?
Hawk: You burned everything whenever we tried to make something out in the wild. You were hopeless.
Lise: Hmph.
Hawk: That's what royalty gets you, a body of worthlessness.
Lise: Yeah, well, you're what thievery does to a person; makes them an anarchist!
Hawk: I am NOT!
Kurai: Gods, shut up you two.
Jagan: Yeah, if we're going to spend our time here, might as well make it as pleasant as can be.
Lise and Hawk: All right.
Kurai: **to camera** Well, it's obvious that things are starting off a little rocky for everyone.tune into next weeks episode to find out what happens next! This is Kurai, wishing you a good-LISE! YOURE BURNING IT! AHH!!
(Scenes from the next Seiken Survivor)
Harmless Rabite: Chirp?
Duran: Aww.it got lost all the way out here! C'mere little thing.
Harmless Rabite: Chirp.**hopes closer to Duran**
Duran: That's right.that's right.NOW KOREN!
Koren: **war cry** DIE!! **shoots the Rabite full of holes with AK-47**
(Screen fades into black and we hear Duran and Koren cheer in the background)
See ya next time!