Damn her. Damn her and her smile and her mixed berry yogurt. Damn whatever else makes you feel so flustered around her.
When she walks outside while Roy is sucking down snorkel shots and Katie is cheering him on, you follow her. You just want to get some time with her. She's so beautiful tonight, even if she looks exactly the same as she does everyday. Something's different.
"It's getting a little rowdy down there." She says, and you smile.
"Darryl, Darryl, Darryl!" You chant, just so you can say something and join the conversation. And a bonus, she laughs.
"Sometimes…I just don't get Roy." She tells you. Nobody understands Roy. How could someone understand a person who doesn't want to give her anything? You don't understand how he treats her the way he does. It would be physically impossible for him to do anything bad to her, or forget that she's in the room. Hell, you can sense the moment she walks in the room even when you can't see her enter.
"So…what's it like dating a cheerleader?" She asks, and you laugh lightly. Nothing near what it would be like dating her.
You cock your head to the side and think that this would be the perfect moment to tell her everything. This silence is the perfect opportunity.
Tell her. Tell her. Go on, tell her. You really do try to, but it just doesn't work. Nothing comes out. So you're stuck in awkward silence until she shivers.
"I'm cold." And she walks away.
Later that night, you're talking with Michael and the captain of the cruise ship.
"Who do you save first?" The captain asks you.
"Uhm." Pam. "The customer." You say, and you don't even know what you say after that because it dawns on you that you need to tell her. Or you think you might physically feel pain.
On your way over to the table, you turns to the camera that's following you.
"I would save the receptionist. Just wanted to clear that up." You say, and you don't care if it's going to air on television some time soon and she'll be watching it with her whole family, because you're going to tell her now anyways, and by then it won't be a secret.
"Hey, can I talk to you?" You ask her when you reach her table.
"Oh, sure." But she's interrupted by an announcement over the microphone.
"Pam…enough is enough. I think we should set a date for our wedding." Roy says, and she smiles and rushes to hug him.
And now is when the physical pain kicks in.