"She knows".
As the words came out of her mouth, Dan's body completely froze. "She" could mean a lot of women he knew and all of them were a recipe for disaster if they ever found out that Dan Humphrey was having an affair with Blair Waldorf.
He asked her carefully and calm as she was standing in his living room, wide-eyed and shaking a little bit. "And who might that be?"
She was not expecting this question. Obviously she thought that he would catch on who was that knew about their, now not so secret… thing. For as smart as she thought he was, he could be really clueless sometimes.
"Who else? Dorota, of course!" she answered in an unnatural high-pitched voice. Dan felt the slightest relief. Out of all the people that could find out somehow, Dorota was probably the easiest one to persuade to not say anything. And she loved Blair like a daughter, so in the end she would want to see her happy. If Serena or Vanessa were the one to know about them, he would probably be cut up in little pieces and thrown into the Hudson River.
After his small sigh, he noticed that Blair started to pace around the apartment, mumbling something about Humphreys and social death. If he didn't act now she would soon start to hyperventilate.
"Blair…" she was not listening to him. He walked to her and turned her to look at him. Her look was still terrified. "Blair, it's gonna be okay, we'll make it okay."
He didn't know why he thought that would convince her. "How are we going to make this okay, Humphrey?! If Dorota found out, soon enough Serena, Nate, Chuck and every one on this town will know!"
"But didn't you deny it? You know, 'plausible deniability' and everything else you do?" he asked.
She started to walk again, now talking with more of a defeated sigh "Of course I did, Dan. But Dorota was always the one who could see right through my façades, even my mom doesn't know me as much as Dorota does. And then she started to put pieces together like your magazine article that you gave me, the… five movie tickets from the Film Forum, she said she even followed me once while you and I were walking at the park! Damn it Humphrey, why were we so careless?"
He didn't know how to respond. It was hard to admit but when he was with her, he didn't care. Simple as that. Blair Waldorf was actually making him feel free. It was just too easy. They would walk, they would watch movies together, and they had stimulating conversation. In the beginning these conversations would get so heated that they'd start to bicker like children.
Then after a particular discussion on who was the better Hepburn, she got so infuriated that she grabbed the collar of his shirt and planted a big one on him. Thank you, Audrey. After that it was a week without even knowing if the other was still alive. A week after that they happened to "accidentally" run into each other. Why Blair Waldorf was in a coffee shop in Williamsburg he could only imagine. It didn't stop them to go in the alley behind it and make out against the wall, coffees long forgotten. And that's how the affair of Lonely Boy and Queen B started.
And 'affair' was something that Blair named it. But as the weeks went by, Dan started to feel that it was something much bigger and stronger. Affairs don't go to Brooklyn at 1am on a Monday to cuddle. "Just shut up and hug me, Humphrey" was her words the first time. Neither one had to say anything else the following 15 times. He was almost beyond the point of no return. And the funny thing is he was walking towards it with no regrets.
"Blair, I don't know how we got to this point but… we're having fun, right? And we were bound to be discovered sooner or later. It's not going to be a big deal unless we make it a big deal. Let's just talk to her and explain the situation. Who knows, perhaps she will end up helping us. She loves you Blair, and I know she always had a soft spot for me." He ended the speech with a tiny smirk.
At this point she was sitting on his couch, rubbing her head and yet she couldn't help but to give a small laugh. The Humphrey appeal was definitely something she enjoyed discovering, even if she would never admit to anyone, especially to him.
When she talked she still had a defeated tone on her voice "I don't know Humphrey… it's all happening so fast. This" she pointed to herself and then he "has happened so fast. We weren't even supposed to be friends, and now we're having an affair? How did it happen? Waldorfs aren't supposed to befriend Humphreys!"
With that he actually laughed and went to sit next to her on the couch. He didn't have to ask yet she still looked directly into his eyes. "I still say we need to talk to her. Denying it would only make it worse and harder to hide. I know we're not even close to show everyone else whatever this is but if we keep hiding it from her it might just be more difficult to hide it from the others. C'mon, we're not great actors."
She smiled at him. A weak and small smile, yet a genuine smile. Why Daniel Humphrey had that effect on her she could not explain. She was starting to believe that she hadn't had a real smile on her face before they started to become… something. Now she had the need to see him, to talk and bicker with him, to even spend a night or fifteen in Brooklyn just simply sleeping next to him.
After some minutes of consideration, she looked at him and said "Okay." Dan was surprised that she caved in on the first time but he was able to hide it. "Okay." She repeated. "It's not going to be a big deal unless we make it a big deal." She mimicked his previous words. "And if she doesn't help us, I'll just have her fired and be done with it." She said jokingly.
Dan chuckled at her "Wow, am I worthier than Dorota already? I must be doing something right." She squinted her eyes at his smug look. "Don't flatter yourself Humphrey, Dorota is much more valuable to me than you'll ever be."
He continued to laugh "Alright, I'll believe that for now. And I don't think you'd have the heart to ever fire Dorota."
"No, I wouldn't." she sighed and leaned closer to give him a kiss. He quickly caught on her idea and finished the gap between them. As the minutes went by the kiss started to become slower and more passionate. As he was beginning to lay her down on the couch she quickly stopped the kiss and got up, leaving him with a frustrated sigh and his face buried on the couch.
"Not yet." She said already redoing her make-up when he looked up at her.
"Fine, not yet." He then got up off the couch and grabbed her by the waist, pulling her closer and kissing her again with one hand firmly on her hip and another on her right cheek. She embraced the closeness again, moaning softly as they kissed.
"Humphrey…" she said in almost a growl and again detached herself from him. " ." She looked at him with a small frown, but she still bit her lip a bit. He was going crazy. She was making him go crazy.
"Now, let's go talk to Dorota." She said grabbing his hand pulling him towards the door.
He was taken aback "Wha- now? Why now?"
"Because it's better to face our problems now than to let them hit on our faces again. Come on Humphrey!" As she left the apartment first, she couldn't see the smile that wouldn't get off of his face while he closed the door.
Our problems she had said.
For some reason, Dan liked that.
She insisted they took two different cabs on their way to the penthouse and as he was about to protest she made her already famous doe-eyed face and ultimately won, as always.
"Fine, let's just go." He said as she got on the cab in front of his building, smiling at him. As she went he still had to wait five minutes for another cab to even notice him. Damn that Waldorf. Even if he gave the idea, he still didn't want to face the wrath of Dorota just yet.
After his arrival, she was still waiting for the elevator. Accidentally, of course. As they went inside without talking and barely sharing a glance, she suddenly had an animal look on her face and was ready to pounce him when the doors would finally close but in that moment Nate chose to appear out of nowhere, yelling "Guys! Hold the elevator!"
Blair's whole body went cold and her mind started running. "Damn it Humphrey, don't stand too close! Oh dear lord, what if he knows? Could he know? I hope not, it's Nate after all. Humphrey why did you hold the doors?!"
But only as Blair could, her smile was the most convincing one she could put on "Hey Nate! To what do I owe the visit?"
Nate, always amused by the way her ex-girlfriend spoke, replied "I'm actually here to see Serena, I heard that a cousin of hers is town and apparently she's not very popular with the family so I was wondering if Serena knew anything about it."
Blair completely forgot that Dan was there for a moment "Wait, what? A cousin? Since when does Serena have relatives that we have no knowledge of? Who is she?"
"Her name is Charlie or something like that. It's on Gossip Girl, apparently she already has the whole background on the girl. Where have you been that you don't know any of that?"
That's when the image of Dan Humphrey appeared again in front of her, kissing her and making her growl out his name. The Dan Humphrey inside the elevator was looking down and still had yet to say a word.
Nate turned to him and said "Hey man, how's it going?"
"Good, everything good." Dan said automatically.
"What are you in here for?"
"I… uh… I'm-"for someone who's supposed to be a writer, simple questions like that were hard for Dan to answer.
Blair was starting to panic on the other side of the elevator as Dan was struggling to give any type of response. So she chimed in "He's here to pick up something that my mom made for his father by Lily's request!" Again that uncharacteristic high-pitched voice. Damn you Humphrey.
"Yeah, that. What she said" Dan said, pointing to Blair. Nate looked at both of them and seemed to accept his answer. Thank god for Nate Archibald. "Okay, cool."
The rest of the way up was spent mostly in silence, with Dan and Blair sharing nervous glances with Nate in the middle checking his cell-phone. The only words after that was Nate inviting Dan to drink some beers later on and Dan saying yes.
As the elevators doors opened, Dorota was in front of it. Nate passed by her quickly giving an "Hey Dorota" and went to Serena's room. Dan and Blair stopped dead on their tracks.
The maid turned to Dan and whispered menacing, almost like a lion stalking its prey "You". Okay, maybe the soft spot she had for him wasn't so soft after all. Blair noticed the exchange and went to put herself in front of Dan in a protective manner, which caught him off guard as well. She then said "Dorota, calm down. We are here to explain the situation to you. Please let us talk and try to understand."
Dorota looked Dan up and down again, barely noticing Blair's extended arms and said with the same menacing voice "Follow me" as she went towards the started to follow her but then noticed that Dan stayed behind and was starting to press the 1st floor button again. She grabbed his arm in a strong grip and yanked him out of the elevator, disapproving glare directed to him.
As they went inside the kitchen Dorota was sitting at a chair and looking at both of them with her most serious face. "Begin" was all she said.
After looking a little lost in the first seconds, Blair started talking "Okay, uh…" now it was her that started to struggle with the words. Dan noticed and came in to help "It started over the Holidays."
Blair looked at him and he gave a look for her to continue "Yes, over the Holidays. Everyone was out of town and we were the only two left."
"So we started going to see movies, went to art galleries, and just basically getting to know each other more." Dan continued. It seemed that this exchange would be the best way to try to convince Dorota of something they still didn't know what it was yet.
"And worst of all, we actually started enjoying it!" Blair said with a disgusted face. Dan looked at her and gave her the same death glare Dorota was giving them.
"Anyway…" Dan said as he turned to the maid who was still with the same expression as before. "Look Dorota, we never planned this. If you said to either of us that something would be happening between us today we would most likely laugh at you. We just don't want to make a big deal out of this." Dan finished it and looked at Blair who nodded.
Dorota finally spoke and she brought down her hard face a bit "But it is big deal" she said "It will be trouble."
Blair then made her way to sit in front of Dorota, grabbing her hand as she almost begged "We know, we know. But this is hard for us too and we're just beginning to find out what this really is. I know I can count on you, I always have. Please help us."
"And think of this way: at least I'm not Chuck". Dan said trying to lighten up the mood. It worked for Dorota that gave a breathed laugh. Blair just gave him a disapproving look. He was getting used to that.
"Fine. I'll not tell" Blair gave a squeal and bear-hugged Dorota while Dan mouthed a silent "Thank you" in the back. "But no make outs here. Too disturbing and Ms. Serena can find out."
"We know, we'll be careful. Thank you, Dorota!" Blair said as she hugged her again. When she turned to Dan she said "I need to talk to Serena right now about this cousin Charlie situation but gourmet pizza at the loft later?" "Sure" Dan replied with a smile. She felt so happy that she actually gave him a peck before leaving. Dumbstruck he turned and said "Bye, Dorota."
The maid then called for him "Wait!" and as she approached him her glare was not menacing anymore but more tender and hopeful "From what I see, Lonely Boy makes Ms. Blair happy. Please don't hurt her."
Dan looked at her for a couple of seconds and replied with a genuine smile "I won't. I promise I won't." And then made his way to the elevator, suddenly feeling happier than he thought possible.
Damn that Waldorf.