Summary: Lily Evans and Sirius Black have been going out for nearly a year when he suddenly dumps her. Heart broken, Lily confides in James, Sirius's best friend; but is she happy with what she finds in James?
The Beginnings of Hate
"I'm sorry Lily," Sirius said, turning to look at the red head beside of him. "I don't think this is going to work out."
Lily nodded. "Okay Sirius. I understand." Her insides were quivering and tears were beginning to form, but she would not let them fall. "Well, you'll always have a friend here," she heard herself say. Her young heart was tearing in two.
"That's good to know," Sirius said, sitting down more comfortably on the grass beside her. They had sat here before, under the old oak tree beside the lake. Here they had cuddled, kissed, and talked. They sat here now three feet apart, and his arm never found his way around her shoulders.
"So," Sirius began. Lily held back a scream. Just go already, shouted one piece of her heart. Never leave, yelled the other.
"Er, Sirius, I have a lot of Charms work to do so..." Lily stood up, brushing the dirt from her jeans.
"Okay," said Sirius, standing with her. "Goodbye Lily," he said.
"Goodbye Sirius," she said, and as she turned, she would have sworn there were tears sparkling in her first love's eyes.
She convinced herself she was over him. "He was just a stepping-stone," she told herself. She became outgoing, living life to the fullest. In many ways, she became happier. Sirius, however, began to look horrible. He chopped off all of his hair, and he began to use magic to make it stand on end. He wore all black, and began to cover his body in tattoos. Lily felt, well, satisfied. He was withdrawing and she was becoming outgoing. She was getting all of the attention, and she was known as Lily instead of Sirius's girlfriend.
Then one day, he broke her heart again.
"Did you hear? Sirius has another girlfriend."
Lily was shocked. Only four weeks ago, they had been together.
"How long?" She managed to stutter.
"Two weeks."
Lily began to choke. How could she not have noticed? How could she not have seen?
"Who?"
"Jessica," they whispered.
Lily pinched herself to keep from crying.
"I'm happy for him," she lied. Damn him, her hear screamed. That is why he dumped me...he liked someone else.
"Really Lily? Wow, you're taking this extremely well."
"Yeah," she whispered. "I've got to get to class."
"Okay. Bye. See you."
She was heartbroken. Why...how could he have done this to her? All she ever did was like him. She maybe even loved him. Lily could feel the thread that had mended her heart beginning to unravel.
She walked into Transfiguration and bumped right into someone. Her books fell, and she would have too if the person she had collided with had not caught her.
"Lily, are you all right?"
She looked into James Potter's hazel eyes and blushed.
"Yeah, thanks," she whispered, bending to pick up her books.
"No, let me," James offered, gathering her things and putting them in her arms.
"Thank you," she said, shocked at his gallantry. James Potter was not her favorite person. They had never really gotten along, even after she and Sirius had started dating.
"No problem. Hey, is something wrong?"
Lily forced a smile and a laugh. "No I'm fine...everything is swell!"
James shook his head. "We've spent too much time together for you to lie now Lily," he scolded. "Do you want to talk about it?"
Lily scrutinized the concerned fifteen-year-old standing in front of her. James Potter had never been her choice of company, but he was better than nothing; and he was Sirius's best friend.
Lily nodded. "Is there somewhere we can go?"
"Sure! Professor, Lily isn't feeling well; may I accompany her to the infirmary?"
Professor McGonagall nodded and waved the two teens to the door. Lily was shocked that the professor had not questioned them.
"So, that is how you get out of class all of the time," Lily whispered as James led her to the door.
"Yep," he smirked, "works every time."
He led her to an empty classroom, and threw himself into a desk, motioning her to do the same. She delicately sat down on the edge of the seat across from him.
"Okay Lil, what's wrong?"
Lily nervously brushed the hair away from her eyes. "Well, I...er...that is..."
"Is it Sirius?'
Lily nodded, shocked, and found herself pouring her heart out to him. James never interrupted, but sat there listening to her story.
'That asshole," he exclaimed, jumping from his seat. "I never knew you cared so much about him!"
"Never knew?" Lily asked incredulously. "You're his best friend!"
"I know and I'm sorry...it's just that, well, I...er..." he blushed bright red and muttered, "I liked you too."
Lily gaped. "Pardon?"
"You heard me," James snapped.
"You...James-whatever-your-middle-name-is-Potter liked me?"
"Correction. Like you and my middle name is-"
"You like me?"
"Yes, ever since you and Sirius started dating...hell Lily, since fourth year."
Lily continued to gaze up at James, disbelief etched on her face. James Potter had liked her, Lily Evans, since last year?
"You're catching chizpurfles, Lily," James said smirking.
She closed her mouth. He sat there, silently laughing at her. Sirius had never liked her. Sirius would never have gone out with her if he had known that James liked her. Sirius was a distraction, a ploy to bring her closer to James. Lily closed her eyes in embarrassment.
How could she have been so blind?
A blush crept its way up her cheeks as she realized that the boy sitting in front of her probably knew all of her secrets-secrets she had revealed to Sirius, believing he would keep her confidence.
After all, he said he loved her.
Lily found that she was angry. How dare James and Sirius toy with her emotions like that? She was hurting, her heart breaking, because of this boy sitting across from her with a smirk on his face.
"I hate you," she whispered, opening her eyes.
"What?' James asked starting in his seat.
"For most of the year I have put up with you for Sirius's sake, and here I was thinking you were considerate...but you and Sirius have been making fun of me this whole time!"
"Lily-"
"So did you and Sirius plan this?" She yelled. "Where is he? I know he is hiding in here somewhere!"
"He's not, Lily-"
"Like hell he's not!" She screamed.
James stood and took hold of Lily's shoulders.
"Lily!"
She began to push him. "I hate you! Damn you! Damn you to hell! I hate you all!" Tears rolled down her cheeks as she pushed and punched James Potter.
"Lily! He's not here!" James shouted. Lily stopped pushing him and pulled away from his grasp.
"You have to believe me when I say I would never hurt you," James pleaded.
"I can't."
James shook his head. "Why?"
"Because Sirius is your friend." Lily picked up her bag and walked to the door.
"Lily..."
"Go to hell Potter," she said; and she walked out of the room slamming the door behind her.
I am not trying to imitate et cetera Ms. Rowling and would like to tell those who try to go to therapy. There is one and only one J.K. Rowling. Period. Thank you for reading my story please tell me what you think.
Iris