Title: How to Kill a Vampire

Author: Cprav

Written: 4 October 2008

Rating: R

Word Count: 764

Characters: Mick, Coraline

Pairings: MickCora

Spoilers: None.

Warnings: Attempted suicide.

Disclaimer: Unfortunately I don't own them. :( I wish I did!! (Well, Mick anyway. :P )

Summary: Mick has not been taking his turning very well.

Comment: I'm really not sure about this fic – either the content or the quality. Most of it was actually written back in May. I had a bad night and thought Mick should join me. Really I would have killed him off, but then we wouldn't have had Moonlight which meant I wouldn't have been able to write the fic in the first place… it was too much like changing the past and I got a headache. :P So I decided to just have him TRY to kill himself. Anyway, I really wanted to post something besides a drabble so I stuck an ending on it and voila!

V—V

I've been a vampire for one year, three months, fifteen days, six hours and… 27 minutes. Not that I've been counting or anything. I've been with Coraline all that time. Waiting as she feeds me, bit by small bit, the things I need to know to survive as this monster. She fed me this information slowly and kept me insulated from other vampires to ensure I would be dependent on her for as long as possible.

The trail of breadcrumbs she's left me over that time has been carefully plotted; leaving out several important pieces. I realized not too long ago that it was because she didn't think I could handle the knowing. So I slowly made it appear as if I'd changed; started to accept what she had made me. Months of the act finally paid off for me yesterday.

Yesterday, Coraline handed me my own personal Holy Grail on a golden platter. The one thing I'd wanted to know since I woke up from our wedding night.

How to kill a vampire.

No, I'm not sure how she was able to keep that from me all this time. I'm sure it must have been very difficult. Some part of my mind that still thought it was human thought that she really must love me to put all that effort into keeping me around. Yes, I had thought of the regular things, but to tell you the truth, I was never really into vampires. I also had very limited time to try the few theories I did have – she always kept me in her sights. Sometimes I wondered if I was meant to be her husband or her child.

After she told me, I tried to take it all in stride – as I'd taken everything else – to not let her realize what a terrible mistake she'd made. And through that I plotted. It took me only half an hour or so to come up with a plan. All I needed was opportunity. I have that now. Coralline turned in for the day about an hour ago. Now I quietly slip out of the glass house and make my way to the car I had parked several blocks down. Because you see, it wasn't Coralline whose death I had plotted.

It was my own.

It's the middle of the day before I arrive at the spot I've chosen in the desert. Through trial and error, and the information Coraline had finally given me, I knew that a wooden stake through the heart wouldn't kill me, only paralyze me. Sunlight would only get the job done if I stayed out in it long enough without feeding. I was pretty much left with fire and decapitation. Guillotines aren't really a common thing around LA; at least, not on such short notice. Fire it is.

I had remembered an old dead tree from one of our nighttime drives out here. I set up a nice bon fire and light it. As I watch the flames catch on the dead wood I see her dark hair through the flames. I must have been imagining her, though, because in a flash the vision is gone. My mind drifts back to when I first realized what she had made me.

A Monster.

A Killer.

During the war, as a medic, it was my job to HELP people and I had managed to only hurt and kill in defense. Now that's my purpose in life. It's the only way I can survive and the few other vampires I've met have ENJOYED it. I'M supposed to enjoy it.

V—V

I see his flicker of recognition as he spots me through the flames and I quickly move. A few moments later he plunges the stake deep into his heart and falls on the flames. The stake denies his instincts to flee the fire. He's in too much pain to notice that the flames don't consume him. His flesh heals and is destroyed again. I told him that fire kills vampires, but I didn't tell him that our line was immune to it. I'll try to convince him that he's still alive because I pulled him from the flames so quickly.

Part of me wants to end his suffering, give him what he has been so desperately seeking, but I can't live without him. I need him too much. I pull him from the flames. I'll watch him heal and hope he heals inside as well. I wonder if Josef will be able to help him. I miss my Mick and I want him back.