Sup guys, another one-shot today, real quick before my roommate takes her laptop away from me.
From this point on, there are spoilers for Bowser's Inside Story. Beware!
So yeah, I dunno, I just kind of assumed that Kamek was probably in there with all the other Magikoopas that you rescue in Fawful's Castle. So this is me, wondering what sort of conversation would go on behind the scenes.
I love speculating on the relationship between Bowser and Kamek. Part of me wishes the games would go into it more, then another part hopes they never do that so that I can keep speculating.
So yeah. Here goes.
…
Kamek smoothed out his robes, which were wrinkled from being shoved into such a tiny cage with so many other Magikoopas. The other Magikoopas were out in the hall, prattling on at the various other troops, Shy Guys and Goombas and all of that, all of them excited to have finally been rescued. Kamek, on the other hand, stayed in the little side room with Bowser.
"Man, I'm glad to see you and all," Bowser said, "But it's downright depressing to see how few of my minions didn't get brainwashed."
"Or bribed," Kamek said, making sure none of his talismans had come loose, "Don't forget about the bribing."
"Or that," Bowser stomped a foot and crossed his arms. "Lousy Fawful, I'll show him who's boss! Nobody reduces my army to this and gets away with it!"
"Sheesh," Kamek said, more to himself than anything, "Nobody tried to bribe me, though. What an insult. I'm the greatest wizard in the world! Was I not worth a try?"
"Not that you would've taken the bribe, though, right?" Bowser asked, a threatening edge to his voice.
"Only so I could've stabbed his back later, your Highness," Kamek said, matter-of-fact. "From his side I could've plotted against him, or sent information to you… from this cage I really didn't have many options. Of course, that's probably why he didn't try to pay me off."
Bowser shrugged. "Probably."
"Do I look untrustworthy to you?" Kamek asked.
"Yeah," Bowser said, "You wouldn't be my advisor if you weren't."
"Oh," Kamek frowned. "That makes sense, I guess."
"Anyway," Bowser said, "Now that the last of the Koopa Troop's been assembled, it's time to storm this castle and kick that crazy weirdo's butt! You with me, Kamek?"
"Of course, your Majesty," Kamek said, bowing a bit, "I'll be all too glad to show him what happens when you anger the greatest wizard who's ever lived. You have my wand at your service."
"Awesome," Bowser grinned, "Now come on, let's do this!"
Bowser turned to meet the rest of the troops in the hall.
"Wait," Kamek said, putting his small wizard's hand on Bowser's back. "Just one thing."
"Huh?" Bowser looked back.
"Look," Kamek said, "I don't know what that kid's planning, but… something feels really, really wrong here. The magic field in this area's terribly congested and considering that Fawful's not even a wizard, it makes me worried."
"There's nothing to worry about when I'm in charge, Kamek," Bowser said, grinning.
Kamek looked away. "I—I know. Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but… I don't know, I feel like the kid's messing with forces he won't be able to control. There's no telling what could happen. So I just wanted to say, in case I get blown up or something and don't get the chance," Kamek looked back at Bowser, right in his eyes. "You've been like a son to me, your Highness."
Bowser just laughed a bit, slapping Kamek on the back jovially. He didn't respond the way people on an after-school drama might. Bowser didn't tearfully confess that he, too, saw Kamek as a father, or give him a big hug or anything. Kamek was glad for that. He didn't want Bowser to see someone as lowly as Kamek as a father figure—it would only sully the memory of his real father if he did. So when Bowser said, smile on his face, "You worry too much, old man," Kamek was pleased.
"I just wanted you to know," Kamek said.
"How could you possibly think something bad's gonna happen when I'm here?" Bowser said. "Me! The totally awesome King of the Koopas! Did you get hit on the head too hard or something?"
Kamek chuckled. "Maybe I did."
"Well here," Bowser pulled a Hot Drumstick out of Kamek-didn't-want-to-know-where and handed it to his advisor. "This always makes me feel better after getting whacked one too many times."
"Oh jeez, food," Kamek said, "I haven't eaten in ages."
"Well there you go," Bowser said as Kamek started eating. "Now stop being all lame and sappy and let's go storm this stupid castle!"
"Right!" Kamek said through a mouthful of spicy chicken. The two walked out of the room and out into the hall, full of what remained of their once-proud army. "Alright, men! Into formation! We're marching into the belly of the beast!"
"We're taking back what's ours, plus maybe a little more!" Bowser proclaimed.
"Koo-rah!" the various soldiers proclaimed.
Kamek finished off the drumstick as he, too, fell into formation. Bowser positioned himself ahead of the group. He looked back at Kamek. "Let's show him who the baddest dude in the kingdom really is."
"Absolutely," Kamek said, nodding.
And with that, the group was off, marching ahead into Fawful's territory. They knew not what lay in store for them, but Kamek was certain that, with Bowser at their side, they couldn't possibly fail.