Hey guys, Vy here. This is my first fic, and it's an Ouran! YAY! I've had this idea for a while now, and I FINALLY had the time to actually write it! Ok, I know, it will probably suck, but it is my first story. So bear that in mind and PLEASE don't flame.

Hikaru: Yeah! Give her a break!

Kaoru: Yeah, come on! It's only her first fic!

Me: Thanks guys. Well, disclaimer time! As with all boring and business/lawsuit related things, we turn to the Host Club Manager. Take it away, Kyoya!

Kyoya: With pleasure. *ahem* Vylet1, otherwise known as Vy, does not in any way claim ownership of the manga/anime 'Ouran High School Host Club' or any of its characters. Such rights belong solely to the author of the Ouran High School Host Club books, Bisco Hatori.

Me: Very...thorough, Kyoya.

Kyoya: Thank you. Thorough is my specialty.

Me: You heard him! Ouran belongs to Hatori-Sensei, not me! Ok, well, I've rambled enough. ON WITH THE FIC!

Host Club: YEAH!

Me: Oh, one last thing. If there are no reviews, there will be no updates. Ok, done now. ON WITH THE FIC!

...

Chapter 1:

'In your eyes, two sparkling pools of the clearest blue, I am helplessly drowning. Will you throw me a lifeline, my Princess?' the Host Club King said, winking at the (thoroughly dazed) customer seated next to him on the plush pink couch.

'Ooh, Senpai, that's so beautiful'

'Oh Tamaki, you're so poetic'

The rest of Tamaki's guests, clustered around them on other couches and chairs, squeaked and sighed in delight. Tamaki then lifted his head, swishing his pale blonde hair with a perfectly practiced motion, and looked at them all with his violet eyes glistening with tears before saying 'Of course, I would never know such beauty and fluency with my words without such beautiful and graceful ladies to inspire me'.

Well, Tamaki's words had the desired effect; the customers' faces simultaneously turned bright red as they squealed, overwhelmed by their inner fan-girls. He smiled warmly at them; feeling extremely pleased with himself. As he always did when he was charming the Host Club visitors dizzy. In fact, the only thing he enjoyed more than hosting was spending time with his favourite 'daughter', Haruhi Fujioka. Unfortunately, Haruhi didn't exactly share the same sentiment.

Tamaki was in the middle of listening to one of his customers recounting their summer holiday when he saw a head peering round the door. The visitor had an Ouran boys' uniform, a stern expression and red hair that Tamaki immediately recognised.

'Bossanova-kun! What a pleasant surprise! What brings you to the Host Club?'

Ritsu Kasanoda stepped round the door, sighing. He had long since given up correcting people about his name, only his family called him Kasanoda or Ritsu now.

'Hey, Suoh. I was just in the building and thought I'd, y'know, stop by' he said, glancing around.

He then nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt two hands on his shoulders and the voices of the Hittachin twins in his ears from either side.

'Looking for-' said one (he could never tell them apart, they were both just as bad)

'-Haruhi-' said the other.

'-Aren't you?' They finished together, grinning devilishly at him. Tamaki heard this and his smile turned into a death glare. Kasanoda's face turned red as he stammered.

'What? N-No! Shut up!'

'Oh, HAAAARUHI! You have a visitor!' The twins called together, smirking at Kasanoda's glare.

Haruhi came over from where she was sitting and saw Kasanoda, flanked by the twins.

'Hey, Bossanova-kun. Good to see you again' She smiled at him.

'Ah! H-Hey Fujioka, what's-I mean, h-how are you?' He stuttered, his face even brighter red. After all, it was clear to everyone (except Haruhi, of course) that he had a crush on her.

'I'm good, thanks. Are Hikaru and Kaoru harassing you again?' she said, glowering at the twins, who just smiled angelically back at her.

'Oh, we're not doing anything, Haruhi!' said one of them.

'Uh-huh, okay Hikaru. Whatever' Haruhi replied. She turned back to Kasanoda.

'Come and sit down, Bossanova-kun' she led him to a sofa on the other end of the room.

'I, ah, o-okay. I guess I could stay a f-few minutes...' he said, blushing deeper.

Tamaki saw this and frowned. He gestured to the twins and whispered to them;

'We can't allow Haruhi to be alone with him. Keep an eye on them. But make sure Haruhi doesn't see you!'

They nodded in unison and crept off, edging towards the sofa. They pretended to talk to some customers until Haruhi and Kasanoda weren't looking, and then quickly slid onto the floor behind the sofa so they could hear what they were saying.

'Here, Bossanova-kun, try one of these' Haruhi said, holding out a little cucumber sandwich. Kasanoda took it and popped it into his mouth whole.

'It's pretty good...we don't get much food like this at home' he said while munching 'It's mostly take-outs for us, we don't really cook or anything. Fast food is pretty much all we have'

'You know, you'll kill yourself eating that way' Haruhi scolded 'Come back some time and I'll make you some real food, okay?'

'Uh, yeah, okay...' Kasanoda replied, helping himself to more sandwiches. Hikaru and Kaoru crept silently back to where Tamaki sat.

'Hey Tono, this isn't good. Haruhi just offered to cook for him!' they whispered to him. A look of shock crossed the King's face.

'What?' He said, looking extremely hurt 'Haruhi never offers to cook for us!' The twins nodded sadly.

'Well? What are you still doing here?' Tamaki said to them 'Get back over there and find out what else they're saying!'

'Got it, boss' the twins said, crawling quickly back over to their hiding place behind Haruhi's sofa.

'You know...' they heard Haruhi say 'Why don't you come over to my place sometime and let me cook you something more than just sandwiches. You need a home-cooked meal'

Kasanoda spluttered, choking on his sandwich.

'R-Really?' He said, while coughing.

'Sure, why not?' Haruhi replied, passing him a glass of water, which he drank in one gulp.

The twins were back to Tamaki in a flash.

'Ok, Boss, this is getting out of hand' they said in a rush 'Haruhi just invited him back to her house!'

'What? No, no, no, no. No way is that Yankee going anywhere near my daughter's house!' Tamaki looked round desperately 'We need a distraction before anything worse happens!'

He clicked his fingers 'Hunny-Senpai!' he called sharply.

The little blonde boy bounded up to them, a plate of cake in one hand and Usa-chan clutched tightly in the other.

'Distract them. Quickly! My daughter's innocence is at stake!' Tamaki told him, pointing at Haruhi and Kasanoda.

'Yes sir, Tama-chan, sir!' he said, saluting. He then ran off towards Haruhi and Kasanoda, stopping to pick up a plate of cakes on his way.

'Haru-chan! Haru-chan! Haru-chan!' He said, skidding to a stop right in front of Haruhi.

'Look, look! Kyo-chan got us some new cakes! They're strawberry! And everyone's got to have some!' He thrust the plate towards Kasanoda, who leaned away from it. He didn't really like sweets much. 'Err...no thanks' was his answer.

'Waaaah! Haru-chaaaan! Bossanova's not having any of my special cake!' Hunny wailed, clutching Usa-chan 'Eat it! Eat it now! Waaaah! Haru-chaaaan! Make him eat it!'

'Ah! Hunny-senpai! Calm down! Look, I'll make sure he tries some, okay?' Haruhi said quickly. Hunny immediately stopped crying and beamed at her.

''Kay! See you later, Haru-chan' He said, skipping merrily away. Haruhi sighed, picking up a piece of cake.

'Well, if you don't eat it now, he's only going to throw another tantrum'

'Um, it's ok. I don't want any' Kasanoda said, wrinkling his nose.

'Well, you're going to have to. Here.' Haruhi said, holding the cake out towards him.

'No, really, its ok, Fujioka' He said, pushing her hand away.

'Eat it or you'll have to handle Hunny afterwards' Haruhi pushed the cake closer.

'No, seriously, I don't like-' he started to say.

'Eat it. Now.' Haruhi said resolutely, holding the cake right in front of his nose.

'Ah! O-Okay' he said, taking a bite out of the cake in her hand, his face the same colour as his hair. It was sickly sweet. He resisted the urge to gag as he swallowed.

'It's...not bad' came his strangled reply. Haruhi laughed.

Meanwhile, Tamaki watched in enraged agony from across the room.

'Tell me I didn't just see that!' he whisper-yelled to the twins 'Tell me I didn't just see my precious daughter feeding that lowlife!' He seethed silently, shooting dirty looks at Kasanoda's back.

'We can't let this go on, Boss' said Kaoru

'After all, everyone knows that Bossanova is after Haruhi' Said Hikaru

'And we can't let that happen, now can we?' They said together, leaning on each of Tamaki's shoulders.

'But what can we do?' came Tamaki's maddened reply.

'Well, that's easy' said the twins together 'All we have to do is find Bossanova...' they bend down to whisper in Tamaki's ears '...a girlfriend'

'Huh? A girlfriend?' Said Tamaki, looking round at them.

'That does seem logical' said Kyoya, who'd been secretly listening the whole time. 'If Kasanoda has a new girlfriend, he's more likely to get over Haruhi. And Haruhi can go back to spending time with the Club's customers. With all the time she's spending with Kasanoda instead of the guests, we're losing profit'. The rest of the Club members rolled their eyes; of course, money would be the Shadow King's main concern.

'Yes...Yes!' Tamaki stood up. 'We need to get him away from Haruhi, and soon! And the only way to do that is to find him someone new! Ok, men! Let Operation 'Find Bossanova a girlfriend so he'll stop harassing Haruhi' begin!'

'Yeah, and soon, before he ends up marrying her' said Hikaru

'By the looks of it, they'll be making out by the end of the day' said Kaoru

They were obviously deliberately trying to get Tamaki worked up, and, as always, it worked.

'What? Making out! Married? I'LL KILL HIM!' He flew, arms flailing, towards Kasanoda, only to be caught by Mori.

'Mori-senpai! Let me go!' He struggled uselessly.

'Hey, simmer down, Boss!'

'Yeah, we were only joking!'

'Waaaah! Tama-chan is scary!'

'You break something; you pay for it, Tamaki'

'Ugh! Lemme go! I'm going to kill that no-good Yankee!'

And so, Operation 'Find Bossanova a Girlfriend so He'll Stop Harassing Haruhi', a.k.a. Operation 'Matchmaker', began! (What could possibly go wrong?)

...

So...Whatcha think?

Reviews are greatly appreciated! Otherwise I refuse to update.

Tamaki: Grrr...You're lucky this is only a fanfic; otherwise I would KILL that damn Yankee...

Kasanoda: Hey! I didn't do anything! Vy was the one who wrote it! (By the way, Vy, you could just leave it like this, you know. Fujioka feeding me cake...not a bad ending, huh?)

Tamaki: Watch it, Bossanova...

Me: Sorry, Bossanova! There's still more to come! BUT ONLY IF THERE ARE REVIEWS!