THE ICE THAT BURNED THE INNOCENT HAND
PROLOGUE
Good morning, speck. Did you have a good nap? No? Good. I made the floor extra filthy and disease-ridden for you to sleep on, so the night should have been terrible. I'm actually quite relived. I was beginning to think you were comfy down there, and for a second – absurd as it seems – I thought I was a bad criminal mastermind! Ha! Well, strap in for a whistle stop tour of MY land of Ooo, because it's going to be a long, long ride. Wait, what am I saying? I'll strap you in. Nice and tight – there we go. You can already see the rash around your feet and hands. I'm so proud of myself. Oh look – drops of blood! The fun's already starting! I'm so excited! Eee! And the screams! Glorious! You know, I would have gagged you, but I prefer to hear your helpless pleas for help. Like having your own personal choir of angels…if those angels screamed for mercy. Are you sitting uncomfortably? Then here we go.
First stop – The Candy Kingdom. You know what that is, speck? A kingdom. Made from candy. I know. Surprising. I shall miss it when I squash it under my feet. Kinda like I squashed you, speck. But I will feel guilty about the people. They seem nice enough, and I don't COMPLETELY hate them. There's this one character; I don't go often, so I don't know his name – something Cupcake, maybe? Anyway, this guy, I SWEAR he has devoted his life to becoming more muscular. But, he isn't some kind of jerk for it. No, quite the opposite, he's really nice. He didn't even think of KISSING this other woman, Lady Rainicorn, because SHE had a boyfriend already. Why didn't he? He is super muscly and she was TOTALLY flirting with him anyway, but he was super nice and let her down easily, before apologising to her boyfriend anyway. And there's this other one, Peppermint Butler. He's…kinda odd, but admirable. With his friends and all. Even I can't make friends with the Lord of the Deadworlds - and that is saying something. Even so, he tends to his mistress whole heartedly, helping her in any way he can. Because of his acquaintances, I first thought this was for his own gain, but now? I don't think anyone would stick with HER for that long simply because they wanted something from her. No, I think he actually wants to help her. Urgh. Actually, I take back what I said earlier. I won't feel that guilty when I crush their sugared bones into dust. Peppermint is a traitor to the evil underworld.
So, you'd think that the ruler of such a 'sweet' kingdom would be equally sweet, right? Wrong. A pre-war phrase states that 'The Devil wears Prada'. After observing this monstrosity, however, I believe they got it wrong. The Devil wears pink, with a golden circlet crown and piercing magenta eyes. Medical advances she makes in the lab are tinged with some kind of manic hunger for advancement. I saw it before, before the war. In disgusting HUMANS. Uh. Horrible. They cared not for others. They cared only for themselves, and were willing to tread on the toes of any creature to advance themselves. I see ALL those attributes in the pink devil. She reminds me of them to the point at which I begin to see nothing but a bleached humanoid whenever she ruins my view and breaks the peace. In fact, she reminds me of a 'controlling' human – a breed of human called a dictator. A dictator does nothing to help their people; SHE does nothing to help her people. A dictator removes freedom; SHE removes freedom. And yet, her people still love her, look up to her no matter what. I have yet to figure out why. So, back to the original point – if you want to see a devil, that's the place I'd take you. Hmm? No, I'm not a hypocrite. What makes you say that, speck? Just because I'm evil, doesn't mean I love all evil beings. Don't stereotype – that's rude. Although…I admire her ruthlessness, I give her that.
Right, that's enough of that. I was thinking of building a giant pool there once I'm done with destroying the kingdom. Cool, huh? And it'll be for my personal use. Hey, why not go all out and make the sides of the pool from their broken candy bodies. Yeah, that sounds about evil enough. And I could have their screams haunting the water as I bathe then. Ah, relaxation. Can't wait for it when I'm done conquering the world. Ok, next stop, the Fire Kingdom. Wait – I almost forgot. We need to do that spell for fire proofing. Unless you'd rather burn to death, which I could have arranged without trekking all the way over here. Close your eyes, speck, I don't want you blinded just yet.
…Ignore the scraping feeling along your arm. I just need a few drops of blood for this to work…
…and the rubbing feeling. That's just me rubbing the magic cream on your skin. Honest.
There. You can open your eyes now. Oh, what's that you cry? You didn't feel any rubbing on your face or feet? Yeah. I meant for that to happen. I 'ran out' of cream before I could fire proof those parts. Be glad I fireproofed your clothes – without that added protection, your clothes would have burned, and, fire proof or not, you skin would have followed. My last captive went that way. As amusing as her screams were, it was very messy. I had to buy a new carriage. I do hate messy things.
Onwards we go, into the kingdom itself. Stop moaning. I hate moaning. Such a worthless sound to make. Go back to screaming. Personally, that kingdom was my second favourite place in Ooo – run by a misunderstood overlord who ruled with a fiery fist over the weak minded fire people, a volcanic castle which erupted upon either the King or his family being angered, people which were slaves as much as anything else. What's not to like? Of course, there's always the threat of imminent death hanging around you. But then again, you already have that, don't you, speck. Pff. Anyway, those glorious days are over. The King turned out to be weakened scum like the rest of the kingdom, and his daughter, who he was WARNED about upon her birth, attacked and overtook him. Pathetic. His daughter held promise of ruthlessness, but ruled with horrible FAIRNESS. It's unnatural. She provides what her people need, and gives things away for free with the only motive being KINDNESS. What a waste of destructive energy. I thought I could influence her, control her in that jar. Oh, you thought it was the pink devil that did that? No no no no, my disadvantaged ally, it was me, it's ALWAYS been me, controlling others, pulling the strings. I had the daughter under my strings too, up until recently. To think, nearly fourteen years of control DESTROYED by a PATHETIC, UGLY entity that didn't DESERVE her power. And now, she's broken. I have no hope of getting her back now. Great. I'm angry now. Lovely. I've tried so hard with it, too. All those anger management classes, all that money, wasted. Let's just go, before I destroy the castle now. I must wait before I destroy it. If I strike too early, my plan won't work.
Ew. Have you seen your face? It got totally scorched up in the kingdom. I mean, it was bad before, but now, I can't even see what it was meant to be. Ha. Yes, wail. I thought that might draw out some despair from your broken body.
And now, we go to my absolute favourite place in all of Ooo. We're gonna walk through the Forest of Doom. I think I'll tighten your bonds so you don't fall out or get snatched. There. I do love the blue colour limbs turn after a while. I remember this one captive - I think I nicknamed him Squish, because that's the noise he made after a few days – his leg turned a pretty shade of aquamarine before falling off. The trauma turned him crazy, so I let him go. Clean too – no mess, all pain. Although, the stump was ugly, so I glued a boot to it. Oh yeah! I left the leg lying around for the bugs to nibble on it when on long journeys in the carriage. Oh look – there it is, to your left. Shame you can't move away from it as it squashes against your face. Here we go – the Forest. When I want to relax, I enjoy a walk through the Forest of Doom. I just love the tall, imposing trees. They make me feel…safe, you know? And those echoing howls, the scuttling creatures in the dirt – brilliant. I guess my favourite part of the forest is the dirt ditches. It's like sleeping in a soft squishy bed. Maybe YOU should go and check it out, huh? I expect you'd like that. Besides, it's not like you'll end up any other way in the end. Don't you worry; a lovely dirt bed is where you'll be sleeping soon enough. I'll pick out a spot over there, in that open area. They call it the grasslands. It's a wide expanse of…well…grass – shock horror - which connects nearly every kingdom on its edges, providing a central point to the land. From it, you could reach everywhere you could wish to within a 15-20 minute walk. In fact, I would have liked to claim the land for myself. It would make for the perfect base. I would have, and I even attempted to take it over a long time ago. But I was thwarted at the last hurdle. I was GUARRENTEED VICTORY. But…HE stood in my way. He's in league with the pink devil, I know he is. Pummelled and broken, humiliated beyond repair, I was the laughing stock of my people for months. HE is the bane of my existence. Every time I see his face, I just want to crush his feeble bones into dust, cooking his pale flesh and listening to his screams…
Ahem. I apologise. It's just…you remember how I said I detested humans? There used to be billions of them on this planet. Back when we all called the land 'Earth'. Weird name, huh? Actually, I suppose it's not as weird as Ooo. Anyhow, there was a war. A huge weapon. The filthy humans ended up destroying themselves and everyone around them. All except one. HIM. HE lives on, a reminder of the HORRIBLE species which are all but gone. And as if to rub salt in the wound, he took over the very place I wished to call my own, and broke my plans into millions of pieces, even teaming up with the pink devil to do so. I hate him with every fibre in my body.
We still have a way to go until we get there, so do you have any questions? Not that it would matter if you did – your pain must be incredible. I imagine you'll injure your vocal chords with all that screaming. Please don't do that – I need your vocal chords for later. Still, there's another place that you should really check out if you want to complete the Ooo experience. It's a little weird, granted, but still high on the list of my favourite places in Ooo. The Ice Kingdom. Pretty self-explanatory, right? I mean, a kingdom made of Ice. Wow, surprising, right? Heh, sarcasm. Gotta love it. Anyway, this kingdom. I don't know WHAT it is about it, but it just makes me happy, you know? Well, as happy as I can get, what with the lack of humans I am able to destroy slowly around here. It's kinda lame, what with the giant face in the mountain and the endless ice desert, but it's so bad that it's funny. But then again, you know all about funny, right?
I wish I could tell you more about the kingdom, but it looks like we are here.
This is it. My favourite place in all of Ooo.
What do you think? It's not what you were expecting, I know. You were expecting me to take you to some kind of dark mansion with skulls hanging from the ceiling, maybe random blood rain coming from the gutters to splatter you head to toe. Perhaps you were half-hoping for a greyish black door set in a stone wall, which stretched up into the rain soaked clouds above; so high, you can't see the top. Inside, maybe you wanted me to have candles lighting the corridors, so the shadows danced to a silent tune. Even better would be to have long red carpets lining the cobwebs on the floor. Yeah, that would be cool, I agree with you on that count. But then you'd want to live out the stereotype of megalomaniacs, wouldn't you? You'd want there to be a cage in the corner, with either a coiled green viper in it or some kind of…I don't know, some sort of black spider the size of my torso? Nope, you'd want it to be larger. Maybe three times the size of the sofa. That sounds right. And then, you'd turn the next room into the dining room. Yeah, with a long table and a single chair at each end. I can see it now in your head; the room would need a massive portrait of me above my seat (because of course, we're all conceited) and all the food would be at my end of the table (because we're all greedy too). Then you would go upstairs, and find my bedroom. Again, multiple portraits of me around the room, perhaps with paintings of my family as well – but only if you imagine me to be less of a conceited villain than stereotypes make me out to be. If not, it'll be just me all around the room. Or, even better, images of my enemies everywhere, burned at the corners. There would be a giant poster bed with a candle on each corner, and if you like, you'd add a few severed heads in here as well. Oh, and not to forget the many swords and daggers covered in the blood of my enemies. Yep, they'd all be in my room to, because yes, I am a REALLY CONCEITED evil villain and LOVE to stare at my victories all day.
Tch. And here was me thinking you were different to all the others. Why else would I have kept you alive all this time? Have I been wrong on all counts? Should I kill you now? Heh. Much like the rest. Begging for your pathetic half-breed life. Pah. You're too weak to make it worth my time killing you. So what if you weren't expecting me to lead to you a cobbled little house in a little forest clearing? So what if you didn't believe that I would really say my favourite place was so INNOCENT, so PURE, so…unevil. Is that a word? Unevil? Whatever. It sounds cool. But before you attempt your escape, or I attempt my strike on you, I need to tell you that this house is not, on its own, my favourite place. Its what's inside the house that is my home, my place. What's in there, you say, speck? You make me want to be sick. How can you not sense the most evil being in the whole of the multiverse? Bow down to him, speck. Yes, look at him. He may not look like much right now, but he was degraded down to THIS HORRIBLE HUMAN FORM. And, by no other than the LAST HUMAN HIMSELF. He had no right to do this. NO RIGHT. And yet, he tainted the lord, the one true master of Ooo, who should have won the fight against you horrible beings long ago. But HE always got in the way, ALWAYS THERE, somehow MESSING UP his NOBLE work. I hate him. SO much. But now, my Lord has returned unto us. Look beyond this ugly exterior to the dark soul within. Glorious, isn't it? The way is craves the death of living things without attempt to cover it up.
The Lich. Wonderful name, isn't it. Just SOUNDS like evil, doesn't it? Hang on. What did you say? You said his name, didn't you? How DARE you speak his name. You are a speck, UNWORTHY to even look upon his true form. But for whatever reason, I need you for this. You're the only one who I can get to carry out my wishes. Such a waste of magic power. Why the magic decided to take your body is beyond me. What did it see in YOU? You are clearly incapable of carrying out evil. Much like the daughter of flame. A waste.
We'll soon change that. We'll put that pathetic magic to good use. I found this book, see. I thought it had been destroyed by that BOY, but you know, it wasn't. Not really. It was reborn. A power, magic, locked inside a book for so long, can't be destroyed by means of a simple portal spell. No, it found a new home. It found me. And that delicious knowledge pours through my veins like liquid gold. And that gold shines out of me like a star, a star which burns brighter with the ability to restore my Lord to his original, wonderful darkness. And step one to his restoration involves you. Or, more specifically, your body. You see, I need two objects to restore him. I have the first, and the other object is a little thing called Wish Serum. It enhances the power of the first object – which you don't need to know the name of, speck, so don't ask me again or I'll get really mad. And the only place I can get such a thing is in Wizard City. Not my favourite place, but only a wizard can enter. Which is where you come in. I shall possess your body to access your abilities, then purchase the serum, before gathering the final ingredients. You don't need to know what they are. Just know that you're one of them. You and your…human side. Ugh.
There's a poem I heard once. It went something like this.
'When you are down and can't go on
And you've got nothing in the land,
Turn around, not all is gone,
Ice can't burn an innocent hand.
When you've been injured beyond repair,
And blood flows past you, like grains of sand
Know that love is hatred's heir,
Ice can't burn your innocent hand.
You've never heard of it before? Not surprised, speck. I think I heard it in the fire kingdom once. Yeah, it must have been. They're all into fancy poems, plays and stuff. I guess it is meant to be about never giving up when things get tough. But, I think it's more appropriate to say that the first verse is about my…failures, shall I say, and the second…well…he he he…I feel I should take it literally.
And now to visit the final stop on our tour. The major event. I shall use the wishing stone to take possession of your mortal body. Savour the next few seconds. They will be your last, after all. Don't try to struggle. It will make the possession all the more painful and simply make your consciousness evaporate. If you don't struggle, I swear that after all of this is over, your soul will die in the proper manner and you will find peace. That is my gift to you for helping me. Of course, you can reject my gift and struggle, meaning that you will die now and become a spirit, forced to wander without memory for the rest of eternity.
The choice is yours. Peace, or restless pain.
Your move, Ice Wizard.
AN:
Ok, so, I guess I have quite a bit of explaining to do. I expect that you were all waiting me to update on 'Looking Through the Ice' or 'Rising Bubbles'. Well, the good news here is that MY HIATUS IS OVER! My exams are finished, and I think (emphasis on think) I did alright in them. But anyway, now I have nearly three whole months to write on my fics until I join sixth form in September (Basically, I've finished high school, but in England it is compulsory to study for another year or two. In my case, two, because I'm too young to do anything else).
However, back to the original issue. When I came back after my exams, I re-read my stories and, well, I know I can do better. So, I'm going to re-write them. Both of them. Which means that, after this chapter goes up, 'Looking Through the Ice' will be deleted from the website. Why 'Looking Through the Ice'? Well, guess what – this IS the re-write. I decided to do that one first because it was the oldest of my stories, and the worst written too.
But now, I have a proper plan! I will know exactly what will happen, chapter by chapter, so as such, the updates should be running quicker too. I also read some books which really helped me. They are called:
'How to craft a great story' by Chris Sykes
'Write great Dialogue' by Irving Weinman
'Write a novel and get it published' by Nigel Watts and Stephen May.
I really suggest reading them, as they offer clear tips and guidance, as well as ways to remove writers block.
I hope you enjoy this new story, and although it seems similar to the original story – events to differ quite dramatically. So please don't draw any parallels between the two, or you'll end up being quite, quite confused. Even so, removing the original is a safety precaution so I don't get in trouble with . (y'know, the duplicate story rule…please don't tell me I'm the only one who read the rules…wow. I feel even nerdier than before now.)
Look out for chapter 2, and the re-write of Rising Bubbles (which I'm going to call 'Darkness Falls and Bubbles Rise' (name may be changed but will be similar to that)), and again apologies for the long wait and the eventual re-writes.
Adventure on!
Wolfie-V
BONUS:
K, so, I'll be putting questions here. Answer them in the review section. If you are correct, I'll give you a special shout-out in the next chapter (along with the correct answer for any curious people.) Note that questions will not reveal any major plot points, but rather will add to the story.
QUESTION: WHO WAS THE CAPTIVE NICKNAMED 'SQUISH' MENTIONED IN THIS CHAPTER?
(Hint: The character is from Adventure Time, and is male)