I can't do this! I can't do this! I can't...I can't...I can't!
Naruto was kneeling in front of me near the burning fire. I ooved the smell of burning wood. The spacious, yet elegant living room looked like a setting from a fairy tale, a well placed stage for the part these actors played.
A Christmas winter night,
the burning fire place,
the Chrismas tree in back ground,
and my family,
How cliche.
My Aniki with his lover, Kyuubi, in his lap on the loveseat, Mother sat on the armrest next to father and Minato had his arm slung over his wife Kushina on the floor. The otrait of a perfect family.
What could possibly be wrong?
I can't do this! I can't do this! I can't...I can't...I can't!
Come to the train station if you want to at 10:30pm. I'll be waiting for you.
I glanced at the clock it was 10:15.
Fifteen. What awaited me in fifteen minute? I don't know, but it seemed so wonderful. Their was a burning in my chest that rose through my throat and Naruto who was hopelessly oblivious didn't see the rising panic flood my eyes.
"I can't do this" Did I say that out loud? Dear god, Did I just say that out loud!
Naruto who continue to kneel there, with a lovely gold ring and sparking ruby in its case, didn't understand and voiced his confusion.
"What Sasuke?" asked the perplexed blond. But that panic was rising and I could hardly hear him. Fifteen minutes...
Fifteen minutes to never look back.
Never to be suffocated in this oppressive room.
Fifteen minutes to live, breathe, move.
All I've ever known in this room would disappear. Could I really run and never look back?
I stared Naruto dead in the eye and every pain and lie I'd known and felt poured through me.
"I'm sorry Naruto. I can't do this." I felt hardly any apology as I spoke, just regret.
Through the heavy door and out in the frigid winter cold, my coat forgotten during my mad dash. My name was being called like warden warning his prisioners with his authorativie voice. The panic that had flooded me spilled over like a rushing waterfall.I heard was my heartbeat thudding in my ear and the stomp of my feet on wet snow covered concrete as I tore down the fozen streets to the train station. They were chasing me. I knew it also, but I wasn't worried. I was fast. If their was anything I was confident about it was that. I'd always been fast. Speed was something I loved. It got my adrenaline pumping, but as I sped down the steps miles away from my house I knew it wasn't just speed causing my adrenaline rush right now.
I glanced at the clock as I entered the dim and dirty station. My legs burned with exhaustion and every breath was painful to intake. It was 10:28. Two minutes.
The train station was bare for the most part. People here and there, but hardly the morning rush from this morning. The station was playing Baby's it's cold outside and I felt nostalgic.
I was a coward. I knew if one of my family members or Naruto came to look down here for me I'd have to return. I hardly had the courage to do this. I was running off emotions that I couldn't control. This wasn't standing up, it was merely running away. Panic was seizing me as I went further into the cavern searching for my escape and then I saw him. The lopsided silver hair along with that cocky smirk.
I hated him
"Glad to see you could make" he said.
Idiot! Idiot! Idiot! Look at what you've done to me. Made me think, do, want!
But I was a coward so I didn't say a thing. Instead I kissed him almost desperately and he responded with equal vigor. I sighed when he did that nice twist thingy with his tongue. He really was a good kisser. My worries scatter like hundred of marbles falling on a glass table. Only he stood there and when we parted for breath his slightly flushed cheeks and mused out-of-bed hair looked like freedom to me.
I couldn't say anything and he noticed. He grabbed my cold hand and pulled me to the train.
"We have to hurry" he said. I still couldn't say anything as we boarded the train.
Swish
The doors closed and for a second, I thought I saw a dash of yellow. Then the trained moved. I shook my head thinking it was just my imagination. I chanced a glance at him. He was staring at me intently. Then, his eye turned into an upside down smile.
"Your not wearing a coat. You must be cold." he said in his jovial voice. I had yet to notice that I was shivering. He put his coat over me.
Suddenly I felt sleepy. This all seem like a serene dream. I didn't just run out on my family. I didn't just run to this man. When I wake up the hell of my life would start like clock work.
But a tiny voice said that this was real and what was about to happen was a complete mystery even to him.
I glanced at him. He was my future now.
Kakashi
It's been a year since my impulsive flight, yet it felt like it was years ago. After taking the train, Kakashi took me to the airport where we flew to America. You can imagine my shock when the first thing I saw was the Statue of Liberty. Now I walked pass the beige couch in our new apartment. I loved saying that. It was nothing upscale, but at the same time it wasn't run-down. A kitchen behind the couch with a swinging door and a hall to the left lead to the 2 bedrooms and bath. Right now I was at home alone getting ready for work.
I had gotten a job almost a year ago at a bakery. I was pasterier in training. Although I no longer saw the need for in training. I had enjoyed cooking so much at home and they had a for hire sign so... recipes I had down, but I felt that it took more to be a successful pasterier than I just knowing thre recipes. But besides that it got me out of the apartment. I had no plans to be Kakashi's housewife. I glanced at the clock. 9:45. I had fifteen minutes to get to work.
Fifteen minutes.
How Ironic.
I left the apartment complex and headed down the street. If I took the subway and rushed out the station, I could make it to work just in time. I liked this part of my new life; walking with a purpose. Last week, I had no where I could have gone for any reason. Now I walked briskly to the overcrowded train station with a reason to be somewhere. It was exhilarating.
Right now, Kakashi is probably at his studio with his colleagues working on a new piece for an art show a few months a way. He'll be expecting dinner tonight, maybe I could do something more home cooked. We'd been eating take out for a week. I'd need to go shopping after work. I also needed to come up with a budget for the new year. Budget? Even now it sounded strange. Living in a rich family, money came and went. There were no "budgets" on how much to spend. Only how much you can spend in xx time. Oh well, it wasn't so terrible having some self-control.
I noticed an elderly woman come in and offered my seat to her since there were no more. She smile her thanks and hummed a nameless tune. The subway can to a screeching halt jerking me slightly. I headed for the steps, and out to the streets of New York, New York. I half walked half ran to my job. It wasn't easy with so many people crowding the sidewalk.
'2 minutes' I thought. Walking even faster, I hurried down the street into the bakery. Luxury Bakery
The smell of sweet sugars hit my nose walking into the small shop. It was early so not many people were here yet.
I noticed a pregnant male looking at a cake with his lover. I had to smile. I remember stories about people denouncing at such "unnatural occurences" but now it was normal. Not frequent though, men still preferred women which was fine since pregnancy for males tend to feel worse than women and it wasn't all that often when a male wanted to carry a baby.
"Hiya Sasuke" was the first thing I heard as I entered the shop with a 'ding'. Suigetsu stood at register grinning as if he'd heard the world's funniest joke. Next to him was Neji putting small cakes on display scowling toward Suigetsu.
"Must you be so loud in the morning. And Hello Sasuke. How are you?" aked Neji glancing his way.
"Hn, fine" I replied. Neji nodded.
"We're going to need a new batch of red velvet and lemon cupcakes. Can you get started on them?" I nodded and headed to the back.
I place by light blue apron around my waist and clipped my hair back. Flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, butter.
I followed the recipe through except for 10 cupcakes from each batch which were my own personal twist. The first a lemon lime twist cupcake with yellow and green icing. The other was simply decorated differently for the new year. Instead of Christmas-y decoration I added white sugar snow and colorful red and purple sugar on it that looked like exploding fire works. It was a simple change, but people seemed to love it. I placed them in the oven with the timer on. I knew I needed to make more sugar cookies. We never had enough of them for the children.
The day pass uneventfully. I felt tired. I waved good bye to my co-workers and headed to the store near by. Meat, Veggies, some everyday necessities. This had become routine. I listened to the beeping sound come from the cash register as I waited patiently for my turn. The girl at the counter looked at me then blushed, giggling slightly. I was use to this because it normally meant I still had my clips in my hair which would be fine if one of them didn't happen to have a purple butterfly on them. Ugh the woes of being an androgynous male.
-Home-
Entering the apartment was a relief. Pakkun, our pet bull dog, was slipping on his pillow and I felt no need to wake him up. I stuck with a super simple meal of rice and fish not feeling up to much more. I ate quietly and glanced at the clock. 10:25. Kakashi would be here in 5 minutes. I might as well bathe. I thought offhandedly.
I entered the shower not thinking. Just feeling. Small hot drops of water slid down my body. Steam rose a light pink blush from my skin. It felt nice. I felt clean. However, I didn't know that shutting my brain down like that made me want to fall asleep so waking to Kakashi in my near nude appearance was a slight shock to me. I had fallen asleep in the shower. Glancing at the convinent clock on the wall it said 3:30am. In the dim light I could only make out Kakashi's sliver hair. He was still in his clothes he had left in only now they were dirty. I guess tomorrow can be laundry day as well. I decided that the postion he was laid in would leave him aching in the morning so I moved him so he was laying on top of me. I didn't mine; it was like having a heavy warm comforter on me. Feeling drowsy once more I fell asleep also, glad to know I didn't have work the next day...and hopefully neither did Kakashi.