Star Trek Voyager characters are the property of Paramount Pictures

A short story that, for some reason, I never posted.

SECOND CHANCES

2379

Alone in his quarters on an exploration ship called The Union, Chakotay sat before a window of stars reading a book. He liked to read at the end of a long day, and these uneventful days back to Earth were long and tedious. For the past eight months, he and a small team of astro-archaeologists had been excavating ancient ruins on an abandoned m-class planet, but now their expedition was over. Chakotay had enjoyed the dig, it had been all he had dreamt of and more, but as fulfilling as his career now was, he still felt unsettled. The peace he had searched for his whole life was still evading him. He was beginning to think it always would. There was no anger in his heart now, that had long gone, but there was an ache, a longing. It was a longing for requited love, a lasting relationship, a place to belong, but try as he might to date, there was always one woman who haunted and tormented his heart, and that woman was Kathryn Janeway. Since getting home, he had dated Seven, a Starfleet Captain, a research scientist, and a fellow astro-archaeologist, but the relationships had all ended almost before they had begun. He kept telling himself that one day the ache for Kathryn would go, that he'd wake up one morning and find his heart was his own again, but that day never seemed to come. He loved her now as much as he'd ever loved her, and instead of loving her less with time, he only seemed to love her more.

Suddenly, the door chime played. Chakotay put down his book and called out.

"Come in!"

The door to his quarters opened and, to his complete surprise, Kathryn Janeway walked in. She was wearing a white top over blue pants and her once bobbed hair was short.

"Kathryn," he exclaimed, getting to his feet.

"Hi, Chakotay," she smiled. "Long time no see."

"Too long," he said, closing the gap between them. "But what are you doing here?"

"The same as you...making it back to Earth. I've been with a group of admirals to a convention on Starbase FX-5 and, to cut a long story short, our broken-down shuttle is on this ship getting repaired."

"I see. I'm sorry for your trouble but glad of your visit."

"Me too. I couldn't believe it when your captain said you are onboard. What are the odds?"

Chakotay smiled. "Clearly in our favor." He gestured to a chair. "Please, sit. Can I get you a coffee?"

"No coffee," she said, sitting. "But an apple-juice would be good."

Chakotay raised an eyebrow. "No coffee? Is this really Kathryn Janeway? Or are you species 8472 in disguise?"

"I'm really me," she laughed. "I'm just plus one."

At this, the light in Chakotay's eyes faded. Just as he'd suspected, Kathryn had been swept off her feet by some admiral or captain and was married.

"Congratulations," he said, forcing a smile.

"Thank you."

Chakotay went over to the replicator, glad of the distraction, and manually replicated two glasses of apple-juice.

"I know I'm not showing yet," Kathryn went on, "but that's because I'm only nine weeks. I should have a bump soon and then, in no time at all, I'll be as big as an elephant."

Chakotay brought over the drinks and tried not to let his heartache show, just as he'd done so many times on Voyager. "Who's the lucky guy? Anyone I know?"

"Not really. I'm doing it alone."

"I see," Chakotay replied, concern replacing sadness now. "The father doesn't want to be involved?"

"He can't be involved," she answered. "It's Justin."

Chakotay sat opposite her. "Your fiancé who died?"

Kathryn nodded. "I was pregnant at the time of the accident. I didn't know, as I was only three weeks, but I was told when I regained consciousness. Because of my injuries, the embryo had been frozen, and I was advised to wait at least a couple of months before reimplanting. Well, a couple of months became a couple of years, and then a couple of years became ten. I always planned on having the baby someday, and when I got with Mark he was willing to accept it as his own, but then the Delta Quadrant happened and that was the end of that." She paused. "But the time is right now. It has to be."

"Yes," Chakotay agreed. "There's a time and a season for everything. But I'm sorry for what you went through."

"It was a long time ago."

"Maybe, but that doesn't make the pain any less."

"No. That's why I find it hard to talk about the accident, and is why I've never told you about the baby. Voyager wasn't the place to open old wounds. I was so depressed after the accident that I didn't care about anything, not even my baby, and it took me a long time to recover. I think that's part of the reason I didn't go ahead with the reimplanting. I was scared of unleashing an emotional volcano."

"I can understand that," Chakotay said.

"But I'm ready now. And I'm excited. I've always wanted a child and finally it's happening."

"Do you know what you're having?"

Kathryn nodded. "A little girl. According to The Doctor she'll have auburn hair and blue eyes."

"Just like her mother."

"Just like me."

Their eyes locked, but then Kathryn broke their connection. "But enough about me," she said, "how are you?"

"I'm fine," he replied.

"Have you enjoyed the excavation?"

"Yes. It was everything I expected and more."

"I'm glad. But I've missed you."

At these unexpected words, tears filled Chakotay's eyes, but he blinked them away. "I've missed you too."

"You've been my best friend for so long and I've missed your company, your presence. You were always my rock, my harbor, and without you I've felt...well, it doesn't matter what I've felt."

"It does, Kathryn," he said. "What you feel matters more to me than anything."

Kathryn's moist eyes found his again, but then she looked away and uncomfortably got to her feet. Slowly, painfully, she turned towards the window and gazed out at the stars.

"What I feel," she said, "is what I always felt on Voyager...that I love you but can never have you. The time has never been right for us and now...now it's too late."

Chakotay got up and gently turned her to him. "It isn't, Kathryn. Over the years I've tried to move on, like you have, but always my heart comes back to us. I love you, with every part of my being, and I'll always love you."

"But so much has happened, Chakotay. So much is going to happen. We're not the people we were."

"No. The Delta Quadrant has changed both of us. But what we feel for each other hasn't changed. Or, if it has, then it's stronger. Because I love you now more than I did then." Tenderly, he brushed his fingers against her cheek. "There's no one for me but you, Kathryn."

Kathryn took his hand in hers as a tear ran down her cheek. "But I'm not a solo package, Chakotay. Could you love my baby too?"

"Of course. She's a part of you." He squeezed her hand. "For so long there have been so many obstacles between us, so many hurdles we couldn't hope to jump, but now there are only the ones of our own making. So let's not make them. Let's just be together."

"If you're sure, Chakotay. I need you to be sure."

"I could never be more sure about anything. I love you and I need you."

Tearfully, Kathryn drew him close. "And I you."

Chakotay held her in return and kissed her soft hair. "Stay, Kathryn. Don't go back to your shuttle. Journey to Earth with us."

Kathryn drew away with a smile. "I think I'd better. If I don't, who knows how many times we'll break down. Because the fates seem to conspire to bring us together on journey's home."

"Yes," he smiled. "They do."

"And I'm glad. I'm glad to be here and I'm glad for the Voyager years."

"Me too. I thank the gods for you, Kathryn. And I promise you I'll do everything in my power to make you happy. You deserve to be happy."

"So do you, Chakotay. And I make you the same promise. From now on, you get the best of me. No parameters, no protocol, just us."

Chakotay smiled. "Just us."

They gazed deep into each other's eyes, and then slowly, gently, surrendered to a tender kiss.

THE END