A Szyslak Family Christmas

Note: Simpsons Holiday fic. Moe's family come to visit and discover Grandpa Joe abhors Christmas. Will Francine and Maury be able to change his tune before Christmas or is Joe too much of a lost cause ?

Chapter 1—Grandpa Joe is coming to Town

Francine and Maury were beside themselves with excitement as they waited for the arrival of their Grandpa in the airport. The whole Szylak family was dressed accordingly for the holiday season and was looking forward to seeing Joe again. Joe was from Florida and lived in a retirement community there. In his free time, he enjoyed golfing, go-cart racing, bachi ball, tennis and driving to classic car shows in this '57 metallic purple Buick Skylark. But, when it came to Christmas, he preferred that the holiday would simply pass him by and that people would leave him alone. Of course, he did buy presents for his family but didn't really care if he got anything in return. The whole blasted celebration reminded him of his beloved wife, Ruby. It was her favorite time of year, and only since last year she had passed away to old age and natural causes. She was much like Lynn in the fact that she was full of life, and celebrated every day she had in everything she did in a myriad of ways. In essence, she completed him and expressed herself in ways he never could.

As Joe entered the terminal, the whole family hugged him, and Moe, in spite of himself, kissed his dad right on the lips. After all, it had been so long since he had seen his father and his father had always been the one that preferred to be left alone than be bothered by others, even during the holidays. At first, all seemed favorable with Joe's return and then later, his arrival and settling in to his son's home. At least he hadn't been critical of Moe's living quarters. He couldn't since Lynn was an incredible decorator and she and the kids kept the place looking spic and span 24/7. But, before long, he started moaning and complaining, right on schedule.

Chapter 2—Let the Complaining Commence

No sooner had Joe settled in to his surroundings that he started to become irritated with Christmas music.

"If its one thing I cannot tolerate its Christmas carols. Who thought it was such a brilliant idea to invent them ANYWAY ?!", he complained, nearly bellowing. The dog wasn't a fan of Joe's hollering, so he decided to sleep in a different room where he could escape Grandpa Joe's yelling. Francis and Maurice raised eyebrows at each other, shaking their heads left and right.

"I could offer you my special flaming egg nog…I know you're a fan of it, and you taught me how to create it before I developed a knack for bartending.", Moe said, waxing nostalgic.

"You can take your egg nog and shove it.", Grandpa said, bitterly. Moe nearly felt his heart break. He felt it sink deep into his chest as if someone had stomped it into place. He nearly gasped and tried not to cry in his father's presence, but it was challenging. Before, Joe had adored the "Flaming Noel" but now, he seemed to be even more distant than usual. Excusing himself from the room, Moe found a quiet place and let the tears flow.

Francine and Maury soon came to find their father in the guest room they had set up for Joe and were surprised to see him weeping.

"Dad, what's wrong ?", Francine asked, hugging her father warmly. Lynn too, had never seen him so distraught and knew Joe's comment had been an enormous slap in the face, particularly to Moe's ingenuity and creativity.

"I…I don't know if I should've invited him or not. I'm afraid he's going to ruin Christmas for all of us…", Moe said, looking down at his shoes in slight anger and embarrassment. He wasn't certain of how he felt at the moment, but he knew, as much as he didn't want to presently, he would have to face Joe again.

"Maybe we should just call it an evening for now.", Moe said, drying his eyes quickly, getting up and walking into the other room. They all said goodnight for the evening and settled into bed. Joe hadn't even apologized for what he had said, but the others thought of how it would feel to wear his shoes and walk around in them. Knowing that Joe was missing his wife kept them from casting aspersions and being too terribly upset. Besides, it was Christmas, and their spirits were lofty and light.

Chapter 3—A Turn of Events

The snow storms had just picked up and everyone in the entire family wanted to go out for the evening to see a play at the local theatre. Joe was reluctant to bother with going out in the cold. After all, he had an excellent reason to stay inside and relax. The frigid temperatures only increased his rheumatoid arthritis pain despite the fact that he had no trouble moving about freely at his age. He was also of the ilk that if one was retired, they should enjoy their time doing absolutely nothing. With some persuasion, Lynn had been able to talk Joe into going out with them, promising him they wouldn't be parked too terribly far away from the theatre itself. The walk would be short, and he would have first pick of whatever restaurant he wanted to dine at. It was an offer Joe couldn't possibly refuse.

The play was much better than Joe ever believed it would be and it helped him feel slightly better. He wasn't going to admit it made him laugh although the others heard him chuckle a bit. He still wasn't too keen on Christmas, yet. But, this was about to change when the snowflakes started falling again.

The chocolate lab, Bosco, had been leaping and frolicking in the snow as if he was a puppy again. Lynn chuckled, seeing him so playful and noticed the children were enjoying their time with him. Both siblings had built a snowman and made it look like Santa Claus. "Grandpa, come look what we made for you !", Francine yelled, hoping Joe would hear. Joe was sleepy and desperately wanted to sleep, but he went to see what they had done he was tickled. Even though he didn't feel like laughing, the laughter came to him, straight from the pit of his soul.

"I'll add a finishing touch to Mr. Claus.", Joe said, smiling softly. He took the navy tam o'shanter from his head and placed it on the snowman, and stood back, admiring his artistic touch.

"Hey, that doesn't look half bad, pops.", Moe said, stepping out to photograph the moment when they least expected it. Being caught off guard, Joe actually laughed.

It was a laugh of pure mirth, which surprised them all.

"When you're going to take a photo, at least warn me first, Morris !", Joe chortled until Maury caught him off guard with a snowball.

"Ok, whoever threw that is going to pay dearly !", Joe threatened playfully. He didn't see Maury hiding behind a snow-fort he had recently crafted but could hear him giggling. With Francine by his side, the two pummeled him with a barrage of snowballs.

"I give ! I give !", Maury stated, waving the end of his white scarf in surrender. The two helped him up and laughed heartily. Lynn, who was standing at the door, shivered a bit.

"Come back in, I'll make some soup and hot cocoa.", she said, sweetly. Tomorrow would be Christmas Day. They would be attending the Christmas Eve service at the church before tomorrow, but already they had witnessed a miracle. Joe's happiness was back, even though he missed his love. But, he had learned in that instant that he had love wherever he went and that would never change.

Chapter 4—Christmas Day

After the sermon, everyone said goodnight and merry Christmas to their brethren before returning home to their warm homes and loving families. That night, Joe took out the presents he had specifically bought for the family and placed them around the tree and in stockings. He smiled slightly, remembering how Ruby would relish doing the same, and always left him something special in his lap when he slept, and tonight, he felt as if her hand had been in his, impossible as that was. Even if it was unlikely her hand had been inside of his, the warmth was still there by the end of the night and he went to sleep knowing she would always be nearby so long as her memory was fresh and vibrant within his mind.

Lynn's nose twitched at the tantalizing smell of peppercorn bacon frying in the kitchen followed by the sweet fragrance of coffee cake and unmistakable odor of scrambled eggs and sausage.

"Mmm…Something smells incredible…", Moe said, practically drooling as he awoke slowly from his slumber. The entire family, dog included, wandered into the kitchen to see Joe cooking and humming along to a Manheim Steamroller CD he was playing in the CD player.

"Merry Christmas !", he said, happily, his blue eyes sparkling joyfully.

"I think Grandpa's been abducted….", Francine said, mouth agape.

"No, that's Joe. The Christmas spirit has made a home in his heart.", Maury stated, quite profoundly.

"Kid's right. Now just sit back, relax and let Grandpa take care of every last little thing.", Joe said as he served them breakfast and served himself last.

The Szyslaks savored every bite of their breakfast feast until they were spirited away into the family room. Joe was taking photos left and right as Lynn, Moe and the children opened their presents. Even Bosco enjoyed his Giganta-Bone, which Joe made certain had mint for that stinky breath of his. All too soon though, the presents had been unwrapped and cleaned up and the family was resting in the family room watching Christmas-themed marathons.

Epilogue

Sadly, Uncle Joe had to leave for Florida, but he would make certain to make an exerted effort to see his family more often. He even invited them to Miami for summer vacation, or whenever they had free time to come and visit. Without shedding any tears, but with some sorrow intermingled with happiness, the Szyslaks said their final farewells to Joe.

"This isn't goodbye; we'll see each other again. Merry Christmas !", Joe said before the taxi picked him up and sped him to the Springfield Airport. It was already late, and the family was feeling sleepy. As usual, Lynn fixed her loved ones a drink of hot cocoa and kissed them all goodnight before going to bed herself. She wished everyone sweet dreams and a merry Christmas again, and while they dreamed, sweet Christmas music played throughout their reveries.

The End