Indecision
Life? What is life to me anymore? I could jump off the Opera's roof and they'd
never know I was gone. I laughed mirthlessly and took another draw from the pipe sitting
near me. Let the opium do its work for you, a soothing voice said. Overdose on drugs, it
urged. If you jump from the roof, the human race can put you on display after your death,
Erik. Inhale . . .
I sat there until I knew I was well intoxicated with the sweet bitterness of the
opium. I tried to play, to compose, but I was completely empty. Deciding to go back to
the roof, I grabbed my pipe and left. Perhaps I'll just take a step over the edge . . .
The air was clearer on the roof, but there were no stars in the sky. No stars for you
anymore, Erik! snickered the voice, this time less enchanting
"Go to hell," I told it out loud, and stuck the pipe between my lips.
Even hell doesn't want you anymore, Erik, crooned the voice, at once both
hateful and entrancing.
I ignored the voice and took a long draw from the pipe, closing my eyes. I sat
down, not far from where she had betrayed me earlier in the evening. So easy for her to
do so! exclaimed the voice. She hates you Erik; you know you'll never be loved! it
scorned.
Slowly opening my eyes, I peeked over the ledge. The height would have made
some dizzy, but I gazed down, enthralled at the idea of falling free for a few glorious
seconds in ecstasy. I climbed to my feet, clutching the pipe in my hand as I stood on the
ledge.
So easy! All it would take is a step. A single step. I paced around carelessly on the
ledge, sometimes swinging my leg down over the side like a tightrope walker. Good bye
world, that always hated me. Good bye dismal life. Good bye Christine. I'm sure you'll
love me when I'm gone . . . Ha! cried the voice, sniggering delightedly. She'll never love
you!
I agreed sadly with the terrible voice, and was about to leap when it struck me that
it would satisfy Christine to see me dead. She would relish the fact that I'm no longer
around! My revenge would not be in the form of my death . . . others would die in my
stead.
I chuckled darkly as I conceived a plan that would surely lure that despicable
viscount to his death. How delightful to make Christine choose while peoples' lives are at
stake! gloated the voice gleefully.
I hopped back onto the roof and resumed my former activity with the pipe.
"Oh yes," I laughed insanely into the night, "I daresay people shall die in my
stead!"
I took one last long draw from the pipe and returned to the cellars, to wait for the
next evening's performance.
Life? What is life to me anymore? I could jump off the Opera's roof and they'd
never know I was gone. I laughed mirthlessly and took another draw from the pipe sitting
near me. Let the opium do its work for you, a soothing voice said. Overdose on drugs, it
urged. If you jump from the roof, the human race can put you on display after your death,
Erik. Inhale . . .
I sat there until I knew I was well intoxicated with the sweet bitterness of the
opium. I tried to play, to compose, but I was completely empty. Deciding to go back to
the roof, I grabbed my pipe and left. Perhaps I'll just take a step over the edge . . .
The air was clearer on the roof, but there were no stars in the sky. No stars for you
anymore, Erik! snickered the voice, this time less enchanting
"Go to hell," I told it out loud, and stuck the pipe between my lips.
Even hell doesn't want you anymore, Erik, crooned the voice, at once both
hateful and entrancing.
I ignored the voice and took a long draw from the pipe, closing my eyes. I sat
down, not far from where she had betrayed me earlier in the evening. So easy for her to
do so! exclaimed the voice. She hates you Erik; you know you'll never be loved! it
scorned.
Slowly opening my eyes, I peeked over the ledge. The height would have made
some dizzy, but I gazed down, enthralled at the idea of falling free for a few glorious
seconds in ecstasy. I climbed to my feet, clutching the pipe in my hand as I stood on the
ledge.
So easy! All it would take is a step. A single step. I paced around carelessly on the
ledge, sometimes swinging my leg down over the side like a tightrope walker. Good bye
world, that always hated me. Good bye dismal life. Good bye Christine. I'm sure you'll
love me when I'm gone . . . Ha! cried the voice, sniggering delightedly. She'll never love
you!
I agreed sadly with the terrible voice, and was about to leap when it struck me that
it would satisfy Christine to see me dead. She would relish the fact that I'm no longer
around! My revenge would not be in the form of my death . . . others would die in my
stead.
I chuckled darkly as I conceived a plan that would surely lure that despicable
viscount to his death. How delightful to make Christine choose while peoples' lives are at
stake! gloated the voice gleefully.
I hopped back onto the roof and resumed my former activity with the pipe.
"Oh yes," I laughed insanely into the night, "I daresay people shall die in my
stead!"
I took one last long draw from the pipe and returned to the cellars, to wait for the
next evening's performance.