Disclaimers: I'm not making money off this and I don't own any of the
characters, Star Wars and the characters therein belong to George Lucas and
co. If you want to sue, good luck, I have no permanent home, no permanent
postal address and no money.
Setting: pre: The Phantom Menace
Author's notes: This is rather angsty and dark, hope you enjoy it and
please let me know what you think, constructive criticism is especially
appreciated. There will be three chapters in total. * * indicates
thoughts
Can what is lost be found?
Jera (jera_cuk@yahoo.co.uk)
Part One: Seeking
Obi-Wan groaned as a fresh wave of pain hit him. He had no idea how long he had been unconscious for this time, but the pain seemed to pass more quickly than before. He did not think they had come for him for quite a while. He pressed his cheek on the rough floor he was lying on and then, slowly, eased himself up into a sitting position against one of the stone walls.
He did not know how long he had been in this place, though he thought it to be no more than a lunar cycle it felt more like forever. The time before this place seemed to be slipping from his memory, as if his brain could not accept that he knew of a time without pain.
He forced himself to remember how he had arrived here, in this rough and miserable cell, bound so he could barely move. He and his master had been on Talok III, negotiating a peace treaty between the Gagh and the Yanorans. They had been there for several weeks and had thought the talks were progressing well. But it had all been a sham, the Gagh had been using the negotiations to lure high-ranking Yanorans into one place, which they had then blown up, killing many of their own people too.
But he wondered now if that had been their only aim. The request for Jedi as mediators, for Qui-Gon Jinn in particular had come from both parties but that would have been easily done. What did the Gagh want with Jedi? Was his Master In this place too?
They had both been caught inside, trying to help others, when the building collapsed. The last thing he remembered was being hit by a piece of falling ceiling. Then he had woken up here, at first he had not even known who was holding him but he had come to recognise the subtle accents that pointed out his captors' origins.. He was cut off from the Force by the thing they had put in his head and he had a blindfold which had proved impossible to remove. He did not even know if his Master was alive. He was alone, totally alone.
At first they had interrogated him, demanding answers he did not know. They had tortured him then, first he had been beaten with bats and rope, hung from ceilings until he thought his arms would be torn from his body. Starvation and drugs came next. They had injected chemical concoctions into him but still were unsatisfied with his answers, though by this point Obi-Wan could barely understand the questions. They had shorn his hair and taken his precious Padawan braid. They had fried his nerves, or worked on a single piece of his body until he thought he would welcome death. He had lost consciousness so many times.
That had become almost a pleasure, sleep in such pain was impossible, it was only when unconscious that the pain went. They had not come for a while. He did not know how long, but now he could hear them coming again. He could make out four sets of footsteps, heavy and loud, coming for him. What would they do to him now?
*-*-*-*-*
In his quarters on Coruscant Qui-Gon Jinn paced. His emotions were in turmoil, fear, anger, every emotion he should let go, seethed in him. His Padawan had been missing for three weeks and he was stuck here, unable to do anything. After the collapse of the building on Talok III Qui-Gon had woken up in a medical facility, but there had been no trace of Obi-Wan. He, himself, had been seriously injured but his Padawan had not been found.
In fact the Healers had been unwilling to release him from the Medical Wing at all, saying he still needed rest. He managed to persuade them that he could rest as well in his quarters, although if he was honest with himself his persuasion had been nearer a threat. And now here he was, pacing up and down, desperately trying to seek his Padawan mentally, since he was unable to do so physically.
Qui-Gon refused to think of the possibility that Obi-Wan could be dead * I would have known * he thought miserably, yet he could not find Obi-Wan in the Force. He was sure either the Gagh or the Yanorans were holding his apprentice, yet the Council had refused to allow him to search for him. They said he had only been out of the care of the healers for a week, and that they were searching, but Qui-Gon had never felt so helpless in his life.
Suddenly his doorbell chimed. He hurried to the door, hoping it would be someone with news and not another Healer. He was in luck, Mace Windu stood outside the door, his face grave.
"You've found something?" Qui-Gon demanded, dispensing with all pleasantries as he let his old friend into the apartment.
"We have a lead, though it's tenuous", Mace confirmed, knowing his friend needed to hear that first. "Come, Qui-Gon, sit down, so I can tell you. Unless you want to make yourself ill enough that you can't come along?" He said dryly as he watched his friend continue to pace.
The remark got him a glare, no matter how 'ill' Qui-Gon was he would not be missing out on a rescue mission, but he sat down on the couch anyway. "What news, tell me, Mace", he requested, when Windu did not speak immediately.
"An old contact of mine on Canara got in touch today. He has overheard Gagh talking about Jedi. He thought little of it at first but last week he heard something more concrete. A Gagh was boasting of their 'success' at the conference with the Yanorans"
"Which means it was the Gagh who blew us all up", Qui-Gon exclaimed. "They killed their own people as well".
"They did. Underlings and servants only though, the upper ranks knew to clear the hall", Mace said, disgust evident in his voice. "But it was what my friend overheard two-day ago that is most important. He believes they are holding a captive from the conference in a disused military complex on Canara's western continent".
"Obi-Wan", Qui-Gon breathed, almost not daring to believe as he was given his first hope in days.
"He is the only one still unaccounted for", Mace said gravely. "But as I said", he continued before Qui-Gon's hopes would rise too far, "this is tenuous information at best. My friend is currently trying to pinpoint a more precise location, and the Council is currently considering..."
"Considering? What is there to consider?" Qui-Gon interrupted him angrily.
"Peace, Qui-Gon", Mace reached out, knowing that he must stay calm for his friend's sake. Mace had grown fond of the young Jedi himself, as he had seen his old fiend slowly open up and let the young man into his affections. "You know that Canara is a Rim World, the Republic has no authority there. And the Gagh have a stranglehold on the planet, controlling who enters and exits. So the Council is considering what is the best format for a rescue team".
"I am sorry, Mace", Qui-Gon said softly, as he struggled for calm. "My temper is getting the better of me right now. Go on".
"The Council thought that two Jedi would have the best chance of success, of being able to slip on and off the planet unseen and conduct a rescue. Naturally I'm going as it is my contact and they were wondering if you were well enough to come, after you departed from the Healers' care so... abruptly?"
Qui-Gon nodded, recognising the reproof but choosing to ignore it for now. He had more important things to consider, "When do we leave?"
"Tonight, a ship is being readied now", Mace answered. "Come one, I'll help you pack. We have an apprentice to find".
*-*-*-*-*
Obi-Wan stayed still as the four guards entered his cell. He recognised their voices, as being those of his regular tormentors but tonight their voices appeared slurred and Obi-Wan could smell the alcohol they had drunk. The fear inside Obi-Wan began to rise as they laughed at him.
Finally one of them spoke, "Well, Jedi brat, I guess you thought you'd been forgotten about, didn't you? A few decisions have been made y'see. You ain't got the info we was after, brat, the higher-ups ain't pleased as they have to go and find another of you Jedi scum but they don't care no more what we do with you. Yous ours now, no more questions are gonna be asked and we'se gonna take care of you."
Their laughter at these words chilled Obi-Wan to the bone, but still a spark of hope lit within him. His tormentor's words had given him hope. His Master was not held here, he was free, he was safe. He would find Obi- Wan, he was sure of it, he just had to hold on. Obi-Wan sank as deep within himself as he could, hiding his consciousness deep inside himself, away from the whatever torment was about to be inflicted on his physical self. He had to hold on...
Within minutes of their arrival they had stripped Obi-Wan's ragged clothing off him and forced him onto his hand and knees. The movements sent new waves of pain through his body but it was his mind that screamed the most. He could not believe this was happening * Master, where are you * his mind called out but as the first hands began to touch and probe him his hope sank. His master was not coming for him. His memories of freedom sank out of sight and he was trapped in the present.
The next hours were worse than anything that had come before. Hands tore at his ragged clothing and as new pain hit him he bit his lip, unable to call on the Force to aid him but still refusing to allow these creatures to see him afraid. He would not let them win. He tried to let his mind wonder away as he felt hands roam over him. He tried to see his Master's face but the image would not stay, he was trapped, forced to experience everything.
*-*-*-*-*
Qui-Gon sighed as he stood in the cockpit of the transport that was taking himself and Mace Windu towards Canara. Qui-Gon had heard rumours of how the Gagh usually treated their prisoners and could not release the icy ball of fear, which had lodged in his heart. He knew it had only been pure chance that had kept the Gagh from taking him captive as well, the Yanorans had simply found him first, in sufficient number that the Gagh could not deal with them, but this did nothing to aid his fears for Obi-Wan.
They would have to spend two more days in hyperspace before they reached Canara and the time was wearing hard on Qui-Gon. He concentrated on his feelings and tried to release his fear, but he found it impossible. After Xanatos he had not thought he would care as much about another being again, but he did about Obi-Wan.
"Try and calm down, my friend", the voice that broke into his thoughts was Mace Windu's. "Worrying isn't going to get us their any faster."
"I know," Qui-Gon sighed, "but he has been missing for over three weeks. Anything could have happened to him."
"We will find him, Qui-Gon. We will."
"We don't even know why he was taken, Mace. What did the Gagh want with a Jedi?"
"I don't know, Qui-Gon, but I intend to find out. And I intend to make sure that the Gagh fully realise their error in hurting one of our own", Mace said harshly.
Qui-Gon nodded at this, fully agreeing with this sentiment and turned to look out of the cockpit once again.
*-*-*-*-*
Obi-Wan lay, curled in a ball, in the corner of his cell. His mind had closed off any memories except those of the past nights. He felt as if he had always been here and that he would always be here. His mind wandered, trying to recall the times when he had been free, when he had been safe, but they were faint and distant, they fled as he clutched at them. Faces, voices, scents, all were fading. Obi-Wan would have welcomed death with open arms now.
tbc
please let me know what you think, part two will be coming soon!
Can what is lost be found?
Jera (jera_cuk@yahoo.co.uk)
Part One: Seeking
Obi-Wan groaned as a fresh wave of pain hit him. He had no idea how long he had been unconscious for this time, but the pain seemed to pass more quickly than before. He did not think they had come for him for quite a while. He pressed his cheek on the rough floor he was lying on and then, slowly, eased himself up into a sitting position against one of the stone walls.
He did not know how long he had been in this place, though he thought it to be no more than a lunar cycle it felt more like forever. The time before this place seemed to be slipping from his memory, as if his brain could not accept that he knew of a time without pain.
He forced himself to remember how he had arrived here, in this rough and miserable cell, bound so he could barely move. He and his master had been on Talok III, negotiating a peace treaty between the Gagh and the Yanorans. They had been there for several weeks and had thought the talks were progressing well. But it had all been a sham, the Gagh had been using the negotiations to lure high-ranking Yanorans into one place, which they had then blown up, killing many of their own people too.
But he wondered now if that had been their only aim. The request for Jedi as mediators, for Qui-Gon Jinn in particular had come from both parties but that would have been easily done. What did the Gagh want with Jedi? Was his Master In this place too?
They had both been caught inside, trying to help others, when the building collapsed. The last thing he remembered was being hit by a piece of falling ceiling. Then he had woken up here, at first he had not even known who was holding him but he had come to recognise the subtle accents that pointed out his captors' origins.. He was cut off from the Force by the thing they had put in his head and he had a blindfold which had proved impossible to remove. He did not even know if his Master was alive. He was alone, totally alone.
At first they had interrogated him, demanding answers he did not know. They had tortured him then, first he had been beaten with bats and rope, hung from ceilings until he thought his arms would be torn from his body. Starvation and drugs came next. They had injected chemical concoctions into him but still were unsatisfied with his answers, though by this point Obi-Wan could barely understand the questions. They had shorn his hair and taken his precious Padawan braid. They had fried his nerves, or worked on a single piece of his body until he thought he would welcome death. He had lost consciousness so many times.
That had become almost a pleasure, sleep in such pain was impossible, it was only when unconscious that the pain went. They had not come for a while. He did not know how long, but now he could hear them coming again. He could make out four sets of footsteps, heavy and loud, coming for him. What would they do to him now?
*-*-*-*-*
In his quarters on Coruscant Qui-Gon Jinn paced. His emotions were in turmoil, fear, anger, every emotion he should let go, seethed in him. His Padawan had been missing for three weeks and he was stuck here, unable to do anything. After the collapse of the building on Talok III Qui-Gon had woken up in a medical facility, but there had been no trace of Obi-Wan. He, himself, had been seriously injured but his Padawan had not been found.
In fact the Healers had been unwilling to release him from the Medical Wing at all, saying he still needed rest. He managed to persuade them that he could rest as well in his quarters, although if he was honest with himself his persuasion had been nearer a threat. And now here he was, pacing up and down, desperately trying to seek his Padawan mentally, since he was unable to do so physically.
Qui-Gon refused to think of the possibility that Obi-Wan could be dead * I would have known * he thought miserably, yet he could not find Obi-Wan in the Force. He was sure either the Gagh or the Yanorans were holding his apprentice, yet the Council had refused to allow him to search for him. They said he had only been out of the care of the healers for a week, and that they were searching, but Qui-Gon had never felt so helpless in his life.
Suddenly his doorbell chimed. He hurried to the door, hoping it would be someone with news and not another Healer. He was in luck, Mace Windu stood outside the door, his face grave.
"You've found something?" Qui-Gon demanded, dispensing with all pleasantries as he let his old friend into the apartment.
"We have a lead, though it's tenuous", Mace confirmed, knowing his friend needed to hear that first. "Come, Qui-Gon, sit down, so I can tell you. Unless you want to make yourself ill enough that you can't come along?" He said dryly as he watched his friend continue to pace.
The remark got him a glare, no matter how 'ill' Qui-Gon was he would not be missing out on a rescue mission, but he sat down on the couch anyway. "What news, tell me, Mace", he requested, when Windu did not speak immediately.
"An old contact of mine on Canara got in touch today. He has overheard Gagh talking about Jedi. He thought little of it at first but last week he heard something more concrete. A Gagh was boasting of their 'success' at the conference with the Yanorans"
"Which means it was the Gagh who blew us all up", Qui-Gon exclaimed. "They killed their own people as well".
"They did. Underlings and servants only though, the upper ranks knew to clear the hall", Mace said, disgust evident in his voice. "But it was what my friend overheard two-day ago that is most important. He believes they are holding a captive from the conference in a disused military complex on Canara's western continent".
"Obi-Wan", Qui-Gon breathed, almost not daring to believe as he was given his first hope in days.
"He is the only one still unaccounted for", Mace said gravely. "But as I said", he continued before Qui-Gon's hopes would rise too far, "this is tenuous information at best. My friend is currently trying to pinpoint a more precise location, and the Council is currently considering..."
"Considering? What is there to consider?" Qui-Gon interrupted him angrily.
"Peace, Qui-Gon", Mace reached out, knowing that he must stay calm for his friend's sake. Mace had grown fond of the young Jedi himself, as he had seen his old fiend slowly open up and let the young man into his affections. "You know that Canara is a Rim World, the Republic has no authority there. And the Gagh have a stranglehold on the planet, controlling who enters and exits. So the Council is considering what is the best format for a rescue team".
"I am sorry, Mace", Qui-Gon said softly, as he struggled for calm. "My temper is getting the better of me right now. Go on".
"The Council thought that two Jedi would have the best chance of success, of being able to slip on and off the planet unseen and conduct a rescue. Naturally I'm going as it is my contact and they were wondering if you were well enough to come, after you departed from the Healers' care so... abruptly?"
Qui-Gon nodded, recognising the reproof but choosing to ignore it for now. He had more important things to consider, "When do we leave?"
"Tonight, a ship is being readied now", Mace answered. "Come one, I'll help you pack. We have an apprentice to find".
*-*-*-*-*
Obi-Wan stayed still as the four guards entered his cell. He recognised their voices, as being those of his regular tormentors but tonight their voices appeared slurred and Obi-Wan could smell the alcohol they had drunk. The fear inside Obi-Wan began to rise as they laughed at him.
Finally one of them spoke, "Well, Jedi brat, I guess you thought you'd been forgotten about, didn't you? A few decisions have been made y'see. You ain't got the info we was after, brat, the higher-ups ain't pleased as they have to go and find another of you Jedi scum but they don't care no more what we do with you. Yous ours now, no more questions are gonna be asked and we'se gonna take care of you."
Their laughter at these words chilled Obi-Wan to the bone, but still a spark of hope lit within him. His tormentor's words had given him hope. His Master was not held here, he was free, he was safe. He would find Obi- Wan, he was sure of it, he just had to hold on. Obi-Wan sank as deep within himself as he could, hiding his consciousness deep inside himself, away from the whatever torment was about to be inflicted on his physical self. He had to hold on...
Within minutes of their arrival they had stripped Obi-Wan's ragged clothing off him and forced him onto his hand and knees. The movements sent new waves of pain through his body but it was his mind that screamed the most. He could not believe this was happening * Master, where are you * his mind called out but as the first hands began to touch and probe him his hope sank. His master was not coming for him. His memories of freedom sank out of sight and he was trapped in the present.
The next hours were worse than anything that had come before. Hands tore at his ragged clothing and as new pain hit him he bit his lip, unable to call on the Force to aid him but still refusing to allow these creatures to see him afraid. He would not let them win. He tried to let his mind wonder away as he felt hands roam over him. He tried to see his Master's face but the image would not stay, he was trapped, forced to experience everything.
*-*-*-*-*
Qui-Gon sighed as he stood in the cockpit of the transport that was taking himself and Mace Windu towards Canara. Qui-Gon had heard rumours of how the Gagh usually treated their prisoners and could not release the icy ball of fear, which had lodged in his heart. He knew it had only been pure chance that had kept the Gagh from taking him captive as well, the Yanorans had simply found him first, in sufficient number that the Gagh could not deal with them, but this did nothing to aid his fears for Obi-Wan.
They would have to spend two more days in hyperspace before they reached Canara and the time was wearing hard on Qui-Gon. He concentrated on his feelings and tried to release his fear, but he found it impossible. After Xanatos he had not thought he would care as much about another being again, but he did about Obi-Wan.
"Try and calm down, my friend", the voice that broke into his thoughts was Mace Windu's. "Worrying isn't going to get us their any faster."
"I know," Qui-Gon sighed, "but he has been missing for over three weeks. Anything could have happened to him."
"We will find him, Qui-Gon. We will."
"We don't even know why he was taken, Mace. What did the Gagh want with a Jedi?"
"I don't know, Qui-Gon, but I intend to find out. And I intend to make sure that the Gagh fully realise their error in hurting one of our own", Mace said harshly.
Qui-Gon nodded at this, fully agreeing with this sentiment and turned to look out of the cockpit once again.
*-*-*-*-*
Obi-Wan lay, curled in a ball, in the corner of his cell. His mind had closed off any memories except those of the past nights. He felt as if he had always been here and that he would always be here. His mind wandered, trying to recall the times when he had been free, when he had been safe, but they were faint and distant, they fled as he clutched at them. Faces, voices, scents, all were fading. Obi-Wan would have welcomed death with open arms now.
tbc
please let me know what you think, part two will be coming soon!