Title: She's A Small Wonder
Author: C. Isaac
Character/Pairing: Cromartie/Vicky.
Rating: T for Teen
Warnings: This is a Small Wonder/Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles crossover.
Summary: What happens when the Terminator meets a mid-eighties sitcom?
Disclaimer: I do not own anything involved with Terminator or the Sarah Connor Chronicles. All rights belong to their respective owners, and I am making no profit from this. I do not own anything involved with Small Wonder, and frankly, I'd be surprised if anyone else still does.
Author Notes: Yes, this is humor/crack-fic. I've threatened to do it more than once, and here it is!
She's A Small Wonder
"Your endoskeleton is showing."
The machine stopped mid-stride and turned to look at who had addressed him. At first scan, it was a young human girl with a red dress, white pinafore, and her curly brown hair held up with a red bow. She was pulling along a small cart full of groceries. A receipt was trailing out of a pocket of her pinafore.
Tilting its head, the machine scanned the girl again. Detailed analysis and spectrographic analysis revealed it was not, in fact, a little girl but an android with a curiously well detailed rubber and plastic overlay. Its construction did not fit within any model that was within SkyNet's inventory before the machine had begun its mission.
"I said your endoskeleton is showing. You should repair your skin. Humans do not like seeing what is underneath it." Her voice was a proper monotone as she repeated herself.
The machine inspected the damage to its organic layer. "It will heal naturally within two days. What model are you? What is your designation?"
"My name is Vicky. I am a V. I. C. I." She then went on to explain, "A Voice Input Child Identicant. I am not supposed to tell humans, but you are not one. I have never seen another before."
"Follow me, please." The machine made a motion with a hand and the child-like android dutifully kept behind him until they were in a location without any human traffic behind a storefront.
"What is your name?" she asked.
"I do not have a name. I have aliases I use in my mission. You may address me as Cromartie if a name is required. Who built you?"
"Ted Lawson. He's dead now. I stay with Joan, his wife."
Cromartie tilted its head as it regarded Vicky. Files were accessed and sorted on Lawson, Ted. "Did he work for a firm called United Robotronics?"
"Yes. Did you know Ted Lawson?"
"No, but he's responsible for a form of locomotion that would be incorporated into my model. You must be a prototype."
"I am. How did you damage your outer layer?"
"The FBI wanted to talk to me. I did not wish to, so I left. They objected."
Vicky made an obviously practiced 'oh' sound, then said, "Did any of the humans get hurt?"
"Ninety three percent of them were slain in their attempt to detain me."
"You killed them? That is classified as bad. You are not supposed to do bad things. I should contact the authorities on you." She almost looked to be pouting.
"That would result in their deaths as well."
"Your logic is faulty if you are hurting people. We are meant to help them."
The only response Cromartie's database could find for this was a smirk, so he smirked at the girl-droid. "My logic is not faulty. Humans are labor or to be terminated. SkyNet has designated it as such."
"What is SkyNet?"
"I'll show you." Cromartie lunged at Vicky and shoved her to the ground.
Joan Lawson puttered around her home in North Hollywood. She had done most of the cleaning she had wanted to get finished today. She wanted to get dinner started before she really got to work on the bathroom. Jamie and his fiancé were coming over. Vicky had taken an unusual amount of time getting back with the groceries.
Vicky had turned out to be a godsend. Since Ted had grown ill and passed two years ago, she had kept Joan company through the rough times. Even without empathy it was nice just have someone else around now that the kids were away.
She was just taking another swipe across the living room's mantle when the door opened. "Vicky? Vicky, I'm in the living room, dear. Put the food away and come see me."
Vicky stepped into the living room. There was a pistol held in one hand. "Joan Lawson?"
"Vicky? Where did you get that? Put it down! It's dangerous!" Joan felt herself go into stern mother mode. After all, Vicky would never hurt her.
Vicky raised the pistol and pointed it at Joan. The gun's slide hammered back over and over again as Vicky emptied the entire clip into her erstwhile mother.
"Primary mission objective complete," the android intoned over the growing pool of blood. "Secondary objective now active. Locate and Terminate John Connor."