Once upon a midnight dreary,

Her Highness had a vital query,

"I'm all ears!" said mirror dearie,

Once upon a midnight dreary.

"Mirror, mirror, on the wall,

Who's the fairest of them all?

Is it the girl they call Snow White?

It SHOULD be ME, thy evil fright!"

The mirror sighed, for the question was,

As old as time, a constant buzz.

He replied, "Now don't you fret, and don't you frown,

For Snow White soon shall leave the town,

Then you'll be the fairest of them all,

Have patience now, my little doll."

But the Queen was in outrage,

She 'twas a lion ferocious in a cage,

She screamed and shouted, "That's not enough!"

The added with a little huff,

"It won't be enough 'till Snow is dead!

Find me that poison! Off with her head!"

As quick as a cheetah she donned a disguise,

Then out the castle's front door the queen flies.

A while away, the kind Snow White watched a flower bloom.

Unaware, unexpecting, of her impending doom.

The trees and sun shudder in terror,

When Her Highness runs by, she's neither lover nor carer.

She approaches the meadow where Snow White is sitting,

And hides in the sharp brambles of a red Maplewood Flitting.

The Queen pulls out a tranq dart and fills it with poison,

Shoots it- FWIP! - into her enemy's tummy, full of berry of boison.

Snow White clutches her stomach and suddenly keels over,

Falling swiftly face-first into a patch full of clover.

"She's dead!" sings the Queen. "At last I am the best!

Now I'm the fairest of all, I've got the most zest!"

But Snow White was popular and deeply loved,

From down on Earth to Heaven above,

So all the creatures in Snow's homeland,

Stood firm together, hand in hand.

They'd decided to avenge her death,

Led by a rather brave fairy named Seth.

As one monstrous voice, they shouted, "Charge!"

Then through the castle walls they barge.

But Queenie was already sprawled out on the floor by the moats,

So they all left and bought rootbeer floats.

Many hours later, the Queen lay dead,

Her mirror close beside her head.

He laughed to Snow White and simply said,

"I switched out the poison with her daily med!"

Like it? Love it? Think I should write more of these wacked-up poems? Then direct your arrow-clickety-mouse to the review button!

(Disclaimer: I don't own any characters, but I do completely own this poem. It was part of an ELA project I turned in… today, actually. So hopefully my teacher won't Google it and find this link… that would be awkward.)

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