So, I'm back. I'm tired of writing HSM stuff because basically, I've outgrown it. I'm not 14 anymore and I want to get into some deeper stuff. That being said, here is my latest story. This first chapter contains spoilers for "Bride", so if you haven't watched up to season 8 then I suggest you don't read this. I'm really hoping that I'll be able to stick with this story and give regular updates. If you guys are willing to stick with me and my busy schedule then I will try my hardest to keep updating. Anywhere, here you go. I hope you enjoy it!!! Thanks for reading!!!

Chapter 1: So Close

Lois watched her cousin dancing with Jimmy, joy radiating from her face so intensely that Lois wouldn't be surprised if her face stuck like that for days. I can't believe she's married… Lois thought. "Before me." She mentally shook herself. No. She wasn't going to think like that, not on Chloe's special day. She'd already gotten past her jealousy - no need to start up any more drama than necessary.

Jimmy leaned in to kiss his bride, and despite her efforts, Lois couldn't stop a white-hot pang erupt in the pit of her stomach that made her want to scream and cry at the same time. She forced herself not to let her emotions show on her face. Inside, she knew she would always be jealous of Chloe for one sole reason. She had managed to hold onto a man and secure him for life while Lois had barely been able to keep a man around long enough to be able to call him a boyfriend, with the exception of Oliver. Still, one man out of many wasn't her greatest accomplishment. And besides, the Oliver/Lois relationship

hadn't ended well either.

Lois feigned a smile as a few guests waked past, and fought to keep it pasted there despite her gloomy thoughts that were swirling around in her head. Thoughts of past loves, past lovers, past heartbreaks. Thoughts of why things worked and why they didn't work. Thoughts of how a love began and how it always had to end, and wondering if it ever was love in the first place. Thoughts of the past and thoughts of the future - if there ever would be a future for Lois Lane that would include a partner. Someone to lean on, someone to be comforted and to comfort her, someone who would support her and depend on her and be completely devoted to only her. Someone who could love her despite her temper and her sarcastic nature, her hesitation to let people in and her unwillingness to trust. Someone to fight for her. Someone she could fall in love with, wholly and completely. Underneath her tough exterior, this was what Lois truly desired above anything else the world could offer her.

Lois continued to watch as the dance floor began to fill up with all the happy couples in the room. She couldn't hold back a smile as an elderly couple swayed to the music. She hoped that one day she could have a love that lasted that long.

Hell, I'll be lucky if I can have a relationship last longer than a year. Lois thought bitterly. Her grin vanished and she was left alone with her depressing thoughts once more. What a load of fun I am… Lois thought. No wonder Clark doesn't - Lois stopped herself. No, no, no, she was not going to finish that half-formed thought. It was ridiculous, repulsive, and just plain impossible to even picture. There was no way her and… no, not gonna happen.

A twist in her stomach told her otherwise. Lately it had been harder and harder for her to fully believe those thoughts that were once so easy to think. It had been harder to force herself to be completely pissed off with him. Lately, she would find herself glad to be near him, happy to see him first thing in the morning when she walked into the Daily Planet. He would leave a big cup of coffee on her desk every Monday morning before she arrived at work. She knew it was him because she had caught him in the act one day without his knowledge. She remembered how touched she had been at such a simple gesture, and how that cup of coffee in particular had tasted better than any other cup she'd ever had.

Snapping out of her memories, Lois allowed herself a faint smile. Clark was so different from anyone she'd ever met. He was nothing like the lowlife's who had tried to get into her pants, but still not in the same league as any of the nice, respectable guys she'd met either. Clark Kent was a whole different category of men that no other had reached in Lois's opinion.

Out of the corner of her eye, Lois saw him standing a few yards away watching those on the dance floor as well. She turned her head very slightly to steal a glance. He looked so… good tonight. No doubt, that man could pull off a tux. There was something in his eyes that didn't seem quite satisfied though. His gaze unexpectedly shifter to Lois, startling her for a moment before meeting his stare. His eyes didn't look so sad anymore.

The lights dimmed and Lois heard the beginning of the next song play. It was a slow jazz tune, perfect for a dance. Her eyes flitted all over the place, trying to keep them from Clark's penetrating gaze. She'd never felt nervous around him like this before.

"I guess I can give these well-heeled puppies a rest." Lois said quickly. She was ready to make any excuse to get out from underneath that powerful gaze. She began to walk past him, anxious to get rid of the flutter in her stomach as soon as possible. What the hell is wrong with me?

Before she could escape and retire to an early night's sleep unscathed by any more lovey-dovey couples, a large, warm hand slipped into her own and she found that she could not move another step. She turned to face Clark, a spark of fear traveling the length of her body and back again. He gave her a slight smile and inclined his head towards the dance floor, which was very plainly reserved for the couples and the already married men and women.

Lois followed him. Her heart was pounding with every second that passed, and they began to dance. Lois couldn't keep a very small smile off her face as she followed his head. Who knew Smallville could dance? She could feel his body heat rising through his jacket, warming the palm of her hand and she could not say that his own gentle hand enclosing hers didn't feel nice. More than nice…

Her eyes met his, and they locked for the briefest moment. In that one split second, Lois felt her nerves intensify. His beautiful green eyes were half-lidded, almost as if he was in a trance. They looked upon her in such a soft gaze. She'd never had anyone, not even Oliver, look at her the way Clark was looking at her now. And it scared the hell out of her.

Lois forced her eyes from his and fought to keep them anywhere in the room but where they longed to rest. It was hard to resist - it was like a magnetic pull that could not be severed. Lois tried to make the space between her and Clark a little wider, just so he wouldn't get any ideas during this purely platonic dance. Clark, completely aware of her racing heart, restless eyes, and the rise of color on her cheeks, let her go. However, he gave her hand a small squeeze; barely noticeable, but the skip in her heartbeat made him smile down at her even though she did not meet his gaze. She was focusing intently on the back wall behind his head, where she vaguely wondered how quickly she could run after this agonizingly long song was over.

Her eyes were fixated on the wall, but her mid was fixated on Clark Kent. How had this happened? When had this happened? A year ago, Lois could barely stand him. Well, maybe that's a little harsh. Lois thought. But the year before that, I definitely didn't like hanging around with him. But, that's not entirely true either. The year I met him, yeah, that was when we both despised each other. Even though… rarely… sometimes… every once in a while, he has this insanely annoying way of actually being kinda funny… and thoughtful… and sweet…have I ever really hated him? She thought with new confusion. No, it wasn't hate. It was… what was the opposite of hate?

Un-hate. Lois decided. She was determined not to give her strange emotions any other word. I un-hate Clark Kent.

Suddenly, a man and his date bumped into Lois, pushing her forward into Clark's arms. As quickly as she had made contact, she retreated, and their dance came to a stop. Her eyes flashed to his and the force between them held. He looked different now, like he had just woken up from a dream. He stared down at her, one look that made Lois's mouth go dry. She caught the first hint of nerves flicker across his face all evening, and wished she could know what he was thinking - if they were the same thoughts going through her heads as well.

Lois's eyebrows lifted slightly, as if to say, "Well?"

Well… what now?

Somehow, Clark knew what she was asking. And he responded. Slowly, unbearably slowly, he leaned his head towards hers. He wanted to give her time to pull away, to make a choice to stay or leave. He half-expected her to bolt or at least slap him as soon as she realized his intentions. Closer and closer he came, and Lois stood perfectly still. He saw her throat contract as she swallowed and brought his gaze back up where a ball of nerves erupted in his stomach. Her half-lidded eyes lingered on his lips, and she raised her head to meet him halfway.

Lois felt drunk with emotion and her head became strangely fuzzy. She couldn't remember where she was or what she'd been thinking five minutes ago. There was only one faint whisper in the back of her mind, telling her something… she couldn't quite grasp it, and didn't really care. She couldn't remember the last time the anticipation of a kiss had made her feel so crazy.

Her eyes closed, and her mouth watered as his warm breath moistened her lips. Her exhilaration reached its peak and it was all Lois could do not to let her actions run wild.

So close…

"Oh my God, I can't believe it! Lana, you're back!"

His warm hand slipped from hers, the blood in her veins went cold, his face drew away from her own, and both pairs of eyes snapped open.

No…

A feeling greater than disappointment, greater than anger, greater than any pain she had experienced spread through her body until she could no longer feel the ground beneath her feet. She would never admit it, but she was crushed.

Lois looked from Clark to Lana, who was caught in a loving embrace with Chloe. Her eyes met Lois's for a moment and Lois couldn't tell whether she saw a challenge in them or if she was just imagining things. She looked at Clark and knew now that whatever had just happened between them these past few months was over. And that one sentence was enough to cause Lois to flee the barn as quickly as her injured pride would allow her to go.

The merry noises of the party faded away as Lois pulled the barn door shut behind her. She remained where she was standing, one hand ready to go back inside, back to that wonderful moment that had been so close to being perfect. But this was the life of Lois Lane, and never once had she experienced the thrill of a happy ending.

Lois's eyes pricked painfully and she shut them with an angry sigh. It's just Clark. She thought. It's not important. Turning away from the barn, she made her way to the front porch of he Kent house where she hoped to find something strong to drink herself back to a better, stronger, smarter Lois Lane.