Authors Note: This is a one shot I wrote a bit ago when I was at work one day. It's a first person POV from Tony's point. It just an idea that floated through my head about why he's so good at doing undercover work. Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: Dont own NCIS.
Season 4/5
Undercover
Undercover. That is the one word I would use to describe myself. That is, if I giving an honest answer. Not really the answer most would expect from me though. That would surprise them though wouldn't it? I couldn't help it if I am good at it. They all knew I am. The Director likes to put my talent to use. Heck, even the FBI wants to borrow me at times. My Boss really doesn't like that at all. Gibbs can barely tolerate it when the Director uses me for some op she has going.
I even looked the definition of the word up once. Let's see it said something about work done out of public sight and being performed or occurring in secret. I guess that's true to a certain extent. I spend most of my time being undercover out in the open but nobody sees it. Sometimes I think they might see through my cleverly put up mask. Well, mostly I think Gibbs has almost figured it out once in a while. Maybe I'm starting to slip, getting too comfortable in my environment. I know that's how one can get caught by the bad guys. But then most people don't have Gibbs for a boss. I guess I'm more surprised he hasn't figured it out before.
That's why I usually never stay in one place for too long. Less likely to make a mistake and slip up. But I like it here. Although, it didn't take very long for them to figure out my unique talent for undercover work. It took them less time than any other place I've worked. If only.
If only, they really knew why I am so good at it. Pretending to be someone else, putting on a façade, or whatever someone wants to call it, is something I have done more or less my entire life.
I knew it had started when I was a child. At first I so perfectly affected the role of the "perfect son" my father thought I should be. But then somewhere along the way it had changed. Oh, who am I kidding, I know exactly when it changed. I guess you could say this was the day that defined who I would become. Or rather what I would become.
It was when I was 13. I told an outright, bold faced lie to my father, the human lie detector. But there was no way I was going to let my favorite maid get into trouble. She needed this job. Besides she was the only one who actually cared and gave the time of day. So I simply informed my father that I was the one responsible for breaking the antique vase in the study. I knew he wouldn't be happy, especially since he expected perfection from his only child. True to form, my father was far from happy and told me that if I wanted to be a screw up, then he was going to ship me off to military school. Sure enough by the end of the week, off I went to military school. I easily switched roles from the "perfect son" to that of the "rebel screw up". I knew that to this day my father still believes that I'm the one who broke the vase. This was just fine with me. I had found over the years that I was better off without him anyway. And apparently he was just fine without me.
I knew that somehow over the years I managed to never let the "real me" come all the way out. Sure, I let others get an occasionally glimpse of the real me, but it was only after I knew I could trust them. But I still led them to believe that I was an overgrown frat boy who loved to chase the skirts of young blond girls. This whole "playboy act" is actually my best work to date. It's been six years at NCIS, and they still think that's what I am. I care deeply for them; they're kind of like my family after all. I would even show it on occasion, but I still never let anyone close enough to see the "real me".
Whatever the "real me" is. After so many years of pretending, I wasn't sure I even knew who the "real me" is anymore.
Oh well, I guess I should probably tune back into what Gibbs was saying. I managed to catch the tale end. I heard just enough to know that the Director wants me to go undercover again. Great, another personality to put on. Well, I am good at it after all.