A/N The song is Just A Dream by Carrie Underwood. ADORE her! I reccomend listening to the song as reading this, as I do with every other songfic I've written. (If you're fammilar with me on The. Vintage. Record)
Disclaimer: I do not own Sonny With A Chance, any of it's characters etc and I do not own the rights to Carrie Underwood and her songs!
Just a Dream
I was getting married. Soon, I will be Mrs Chad Dylan Cooper.
Chad was shipping out to Iraq tomorrow, and he wanted to do something special before he left; holy matrimony. It helped that I turned 18 not long ago.
Chad had enlisted in the U.S Army, and I was terrified. He wanted to give back to the country that had given him his shot at fame. Well, that's what he said to the press. At first it was all a publicity stunt, but the idea's starting to warm to him. Now, he actually wants to help fight for his country. I loved Chad with all of my heart, and it hurt to see him do all of this, but I guess I should let him do what he wants.
I got out of the car and smoothed out my white dress. I looked in the rear view mirror and fixed the silver comb holding my curls in place. It was Tawni's. She found it in an old jewellery box she had and thought it would be perfect for me.
Something old.
I admired my dress, the skirt poofing out before me. It reminded me of a fairytale dress, and I instantly fell in love with it.
Something new.
The blue sapphires in my ear twinkled in the sun. The earrings were also Tawni's, she said I could use them for the day.
Something borrowed.
Something blue.
I grabbed the coin from my purse and slipped it into my shoe for one more ounce of good luck.
Sixpence in your shoe.
I was set to go. I smiled at my reflection as I grabbed my bouquet from the back seat and headed towards the doors of the church. I stood in front of the large wooden doors and took in a deep breath as I heard the military band start to play. Tears pricked at my eyes and soon, I was starting to cry. They were happy tears, of course. This was one of the happiest moments I have ever experienced. Soon, I will be married to the love of my life, Chad Dylan Cooper. I wiped the tears carefully, trying not to smudge my eye-makeup. I pulled my veil over my eyes to hide them, just in case. I took another deep breath as I pushed the doors open. I looked around the room, trying to find Chad. I gasped as I saw that he wasn't there. The room was filled with people all dressed in black; Mourners. These were people I knew, and at the front I saw the shiny black coffin. Next to it, was an enlarged picture of Chad in his uniform.
I dropped my flowers in shock.
"Mrs Dylan Cooper?" The man in uniform standing at the door looked down at me with sad eyes. The heat in my body vanished quickly and my heart started to beat extra fast and all I could manage was a slight nod. I've seen the movies, heard all the stories; this is my worst nightmare.
He brought out a crisp white envelope, the U.S seal in the top left corner. My name and address was printed on black ink in the middle. I reached for the letter with shaky hands, fearing what the contents might be. When I felt the hard, thick envelope under my hand, the officer released his grasp. "My condolences." He said when I brought the envelope closer to me. I stared at him horrified, and back at the letter. He gave me a sympathetic smile and then saluted, clicking his heels and walked away. I looked at the letter again.
It just couldn't be.
This couldn't be happening.
No, he was wrong.
My legs gave out under me, and I collapsed on the ground, breaking out into hysterics. I leaned against the door frame and held my head in my hands. "You're wrong!" I screamed at the retreating figure which had disappeared. "You're all wrong! He's coming back!" I screeched.
"He's not gone. He's gonna come back. They just mistook another body as his. Yeah, it's all just a big misunderstanding. He promised. He wouldn't leave you. He said we'll be together forever." I whispered to myself, rocking back and forth.
"Sonny?" I heard a voice in the distance, calling my name. "Sonny!" Tawni screamed. I heard the clicking of her heels as she ran down the hall, over to where I was. She grabbed my shoulders and enveloped me in a warm embrace. She cooed my name, rubbing my back as we rocked. "It's ok, Sonny. It's going to be fine." She mumbled into my hair. My sobs subsided for a moment, small little hiccups coming here and then. I lifted my head up and looked in Tawni's eyes. She looked at me with deep concern, using her thumb to wipe away my tears.
"What happened?" She whispered. I held out the hand that still held the envelope and she took it. She saw the seal in the corner and her eyes widened. I broke out into my sobs again as she opened the envelope and unfolded the letter inside.
"Dear Mrs Dylan Cooper," She read. "We are sorry to announce the death of Chad Dylan..." She trailed off as she realised what she just read. "Oh, god." She said, bringing her hand up to her mouth.
She reached down and patted my back. "Sonny, I'm so sorry." She said, tears escaping from her blue eyes. I looked up at her again with hopeful eyes.
"They're wrong." I whispered. "They're all wrong, he's coming back. He said he would. He promised." My voice cracked when I said 'promised'. Tawni looked surprised, before looking at me with a mixture of emotions. There was sympathy, grief, remorse, sadness, heartbreak, confusion. "Oh, honey." She said sadly, pushing the hair that had stuck to my face with tears back from my face. "Chad's gone. He's not coming back."
I stared at her incredulously. What was she saying? Does she have no hope? "How can you say that?" I whispered, slowly pushing myself off of the ground. "You're wrong!" I screamed. I took a breath and said simply, "I want you to leave." I pointed down the hall. "Now."
"Sonny... " She said, reaching out her arm toward me. I flinched away from her touch and she brought her arm back.
"You. Are. Wrong." I said simply. "Every single one of you. Wrong! He will come back. He will!" I screeched, stepping back inside, slamming the door in Tawni's surprised face.
"Sonny! Open the door. Please." Tawni pleaded on the other side of the door. I shook my head violently, even though she couldn't see. It felt like my heart had been ripped out of me. Like only half of me was left; the other half gone. I was breaking into a million pieces. I wrapped my arms around me tightly, trying to hold myself together. I leaned back against the door, ignoring Tawni's protests behind it. I cried even harder than before, slipping down to the ground again. Soon enough, my sobs were so fierce, I was shaking so hard, and I couldn't breathe.
My eyes were blank of emotion as I stared at the wall at the front of the church. The last time I was here, it was a day of happiness and new beginnings. It was my wedding day. But now, it was a day of mourning and the end of a life.
I was perfectly still. The only movement my body made was the tears trickling down my cheeks like a snail; leaving its silvery trail behind. The preacher man stood at the front at podium, talking about how great Chad was. Not that he ever knew him or anything. His words were all a hum in the distance as I stared. "Now, let us bow our heads and pray." He said, gesturing for everyone in the church to do so. Everyone's head bowed down except mine. I was frozen. "Lord, please lift this soul of a fallen soldier. Please guide him as he makes his journey up to the heavens above. And please heal this hurt that everyone gathered here today is feeling." He said it almost rhythmically. Like it was a poem made to help us overcome our grief. Too bad it didn't work on me. Too much damage was done already, I could never be repaired. "Amen." The congregation all said at the same time, synchronised. Then, sticking to their synchronised routine, they all stood up as the music began to play. And they all started to sing the saddest song I have ever heard. It was a choir of voices mixed with tears, the voices echoing off the walls. I stayed sitting, captive in my frozen trance.
The rest was all blur. Soon enough, we were in the cemetery, watching on as they lowered my husband into the earth. The head of Chad's group in the military handed me a folded up flag, a silver chain with a gold ring on top of it. Chad's wedding ring. I picked up the chain, hang the flag over my arm, fingering the delicate gold band that was Chad's. I held it up to the sun and inspected the engraving on the inside 'You're still the one'. It was the name of our wedding song. I smiled softly through my tears and slipped the chain around my neck, letting it hang. I clutched the flag close to me, letting it press the ring into my skin from holding it too hard. I sobbed loudly, the noise blending in with the breeze and the birds as our family and friends watched the sad scene that was me.
Chad was supposed to wear the ring forever. He was supposed to be alive. He wasn't meant to leave her. He was supposed to come back in two more months, but he can't anymore. At least he died a hero.
And a superstar.
Tawni pulled me back, closer to the crowd as the members of the military lined up in a straight line in front of where Chad was buried. The all angled their guns to the sky and shot. We were a safe distance away, and they were angled upwards, but it felt like the bullet went right through my heart. The impact of the imaginary bullet was enough for me to stumble back, falling to the ground. The congregation all gasped and looked at me with concern. Tawni, my Mum and a few others bent down, trying to help me up, but I shook them all off. I would rather be on the ground than struggling to stand.
The crowed began to break off into smaller groups as some left to go home, or just talking. I was still sitting, hugging my legs and rocking back and forth. The flag was wedged between my chest and my knees; it would be disrespectful to put the flag on the ground. My Mum kept on giving me concerned looks as she was talking to Chad's family. It felt like I wasn't there; like I was just in the background, staring on at the moment in front of me. Mumbles of quiet conversation hung in the air, but there were some bits that stuck out. They were all similar, too.
"...and now that he's gone..."
"...when he came home we were gonna..."
"Chad's gone. I still can't believe..."
"Why did you have to leave me, Chad?" I whispered, grasping the ring tightly, squeezing my eyes shut.
Everyone had gone home, and there was just me and the graves. I sat next to where Chad was recently buried. He didn't have a tombstone, it was yet to be finished and sent over; so there was just a mound of fresh dirt. I reached into my pocket and pulled out the picture of Chad and I on our wedding day. It was such a happy day... "Why did you leave me? Why did you have to go to war? Couldn't you have given back to our country some other way?" I sobbed. I stroked his face softly, my fingers barely grazing the picture.
"I was counting on forever that day. When we said our vows, when we said I do, our first kiss and man and wife... It was the supposed to be forever. You and me. Chad and Sonny. But, I guess I'll never know now." My eyes pricked with the tears that yearned to fall. But, form the amount of crying I've done the past couple of days, I've got none left.
"I love you Chad Dylan Cooper. Always have, always will. You will come back to me. I promise." I kissed the photo softly.
"This is all just a dream." I whispered.
It was two weeks after the day she turned 18 And when the church doors opened up wide Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? It's like I'm lookin' from a distance, standin' in the background The preacher man said, "Let's bow our heads and pray And then they handed her a folded up flag Baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? It's like I'm lookin' from a distance, standin' in the background Ooh, baby, why'd you leave me? Why'd you have to go? It's like I'm lookin' from a distance, standin' in the background Oh, this is just a dream A/N FINISHED!
All dressed in white, goin' to the church that night
She had his box of letters in the passenger seat
Six pins in her shoe, somethin? borrowed, somethin' blue
She put her veil down, tryin' to hide the tears
Oh, she just couldn't believe it
She heard the trumpets from the military band
And the flowers fell out of her hands
I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know
I can't even breathe
Everybody's sayin', he's not comin' home now
This can't be happenin' to me, this is just a dream
Lord, please lift his soul and heal this hurt"
Then the congregation all stood up and sang
The saddest song that she ever heard
And she held on to all she had left of him
Oh, well, what could've been?
And then the guns rang one last shot
And it felt like a bullet in her heart
I was countin' on forever, now I'll never know
I can't even breathe
Everybody's sayin', he's not comin' home now
This can't be happenin? to me, this is just a dream
I was counti' on forever, now I'll never know
Oh, I'll never know
Everybody's sayin', he's not comin' home now
This can't be happenin' to me, this is just a dream
It's just a dream, yeah, yeah
You have no idea how happy I am that I have finished this. I started writing this as soon as I posted For Blue Skies, and I promised myself that I will finish it before I wrote the next chapter. So, sorry for no update! :)
I guess I'm good t writing depressing stuff. Wow, that's disturbing. But, I promise that I AM HAPPY. It's been hard to convince Claire ( .record.) of that lately. She's been worried about me. Haha. I LOVE YOU EX-TWINNIE! (inside joke. ^.^)
SO! I hope you enjoyed it. Please tell me what you think. I will get started on the next chapter for For Blue Skies tomorrow!
Don't forget to smile!
Over and out!
Grace.