A/N: Was trying to write an update for Unbound and this idea just kept niggling. It's another entry for the Jello Forever (link's in my profile!) October '09 Challenge. I absolutely love this month's prompt and literally have too many ideas. Anyone in need of plot bunnies, I'd be quite happy to throw some of them at you!

Anyway, this first part is dedicated to twin because she's completely awesome and has been doing a marvellous job of cheering me up after having a couple of bad days. Thank you! *hugs*

Now I'm going to stop rambling.

x tromana

Title: Fixed in Flux
Author: tromana
Rating: T
Characters: Jane/Lisbon, team
Disclaimer: No, not mine.
Summary: Whatever he tried, he couldn't move. He cried and shouted and screamed and yelled and still, nobody was listening to him.
Notes: Jello Forever October '09 challenge entry. Prompt: Frozen in time.

Fixed in Flux

Flux: a continuous moving on or passing by.

Chapter One - Past

The door creaked open and the newest visitor coughed politely. Lisbon quickly withdrew her hand from his arm and looked slightly guilty about the fact that she had been caught touching him. She still managed to glance up appreciatively at the owner of said cough, relieved to have some conscious company and tried desperately to disguise the unshed tears that were gathering rapidly in her eyes. Eventually, she gave into the inevitable and lifted one of her own hands to wipe them away. She didn't have to be strong here and they all kept trying to remind her of that. That however, didn't change the facts. Whenever she was with another member of her team, Teresa Lisbon still felt like she was still the boss. It didn't matter just how close they had grown in recent years or that they were her second family, she still held the higher rank. Therefore, she had to remain as professional as feasibly possible. That meant no breaking down into flurries of tears because being over-emotional was not the image that she should be portraying in front of those who she lead.

"It's gonna be alright, boss," Van Pelt murmured.

"Maybe," she replied wryly, "I hope so."

She hadn't noticed it, but she was shaking slightly. Van Pelt sat down beside her and placed a polystyrene cup filled with coffee into her trembling hands. Lisbon took a sip, grimacing at the industrial-strength muck that she had been given. She couldn't blame Van Pelt for that; it was probably the only coffee that was available here and it was better than nothing, but only just. The rookie kept glancing over nervously and Lisbon was slowly beginning to find it irksome. She knew that the younger woman was simply concerned about her wellbeing and hated seeing her in such a state. Even though she was trying to maintain her professional image, Lisbon knew that she was doing a shoddy job at doing so. She couldn't help but snort at the irony. Jane always relished in reminding her just how translucent she was and she would always grow terribly irritated at it. Right now, she would give anything to hear him say that. To say anything, in fact.

Instead, she simply trained her eyes on the rise and fall of his chest.

***

"Dance, Daddy, dance!"

His little girl grabbed him roughly by the hand but he didn't follow. He couldn't and quite frankly, it was breaking his heart. Growing bored, she left him standing there, motionless, as she shrieked and whooped and played around him. Patrick Jane smiled inwardly at his beautiful baby's short attention span as she ran from one toy to the next, lavishing attention on it for five minutes or so before growing bored and moving onto the next. Even her favourite teddy bear, One-Eyed Joe, wasn't worthy of more than ten minutes of her time. Footsteps approached from behind and he tried to turn to see who they belonged to. He was relieved as he heard the honeyed tones of his beautiful wife.

"She's as impatient as you are," she remarked, placing a hand gently on his arm.

Patrick tried to open his mouth to retort cheekily but instead shuddered as her cool fingertips grazed his skin. His wife occasionally suffered from poor circulation and he always teased her for being so cold considering that they lived in California. What warmth she lacked physically, she made up for with a bubbly, loving personality and she doted upon both her husband and daughter. Once she removed her hand and walked to join their child, Patrick suddenly felt colder inside. He felt as though a cold breeze had enveloped him and it chilled him to the bone. It was unusual as it was a particularly warm day and the scene in front of him was particularly endearing. His little girl suddenly pulled her gaze away from her mother and gave him a toothy grin.

The changes caught him by surprise as he was suddenly engulfed by darkness. If he wasn't already frozen to the spot, the maniacal laugh that suddenly echoed around him would have been enough to stop him in his tracks. As the light slowly returned, he was greeted with the sight of a blood red smiley face and the butchered bodies of his loved ones. He couldn't even pull his gaze away from the horrific sight. Whatever he tried, he couldn't move. He cried and shouted and screamed and yelled and still, nobody was listening to him. There wasn't even anybody to hear him.

For what felt like an eternity, nothing happened and Patrick found that he couldn't even blink. Slowly, the head of his daughter twisted around to look at him, her face contorted with rage. Her unseeing eyes made contact with his own and he swore he could feel the bile rising up in his throat. Her mouth opened slightly and she took a while to try and find the right words.

"You killed me, Daddy," she spoke, her words sounding like nails down a chalkboard. "You killed me. It's all your fault."

***

"We should leave, boss," Van Pelt whispered. "We can come back next week."

Lisbon nodded, sighed heavily and eventually stood up. Her back ached from sitting on the hard, plastic chair for far too long and she stretched languidly, hoping to relax her tensed muscles. She didn't want to leave him really, not yet, partially because she knew she wouldn't be able to be by his side again for another seven days and she didn't like that concept. Unless there was a drastic change in his condition, of course and then she was sure Minelli would allow them all leave on sympathetic grounds. But realistically, criminals didn't stop just because cops didn't have the heart or energy to work. She still had a job to do and she was going to do it to the best of her ability, as she always did. Not for his sake, but to ensure that she stayed sane herself.

"Thanks for the company, Van Pelt," she answered as they walked through twisting, dimly lit corridors. "You needn't have."

"We all care about him, boss and we all want to be there for him," she replied swiftly. "For both of you. You know, he wouldn't want you blaming yourself like this."

"How do we know what he wants?" Lisbon snapped in response.

The red-head recoiled slightly. Seeing Lisbon being so tender and careful merely minutes earlier had meant she had temporarily forgotten just how sharp the older woman's tongue could be. But Lisbon did have a point though. The whole team had seriously believed that since he had started working with them, that his death wish had lessened somewhat, that he had found something to live for. Some had also secretly believed that that something was rather a someone, though she was completely oblivious to those particular thoughts. Despite that, it was still no wonder that Lisbon had reacted worst to their current situation. Jane was one of her own and she was well known for being fiercely protective of her whole team. It was also blindingly obvious that she was the closest friend that Jane had had for years.

Seeing Jane fighting for his life after coming so close to throwing it away was positively tearing her apart.

TBC…

"He cried and shouted and screamed and yelled and still, nobody was listening to him. There wasn't even anybody to hear him." is a misquote from the song 'Nobody Listened' by Delta Goodrem.