Author's Notes: I've been meaning to do this story for over a year and half...yare yare...
Afi inspired!
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Your Sins Into To Me
By Silver Miko
I... I came here by day, but I left here in darkness
And found you, found you on the way
And now, it is silver and silent, it is silver and cold
You, in somber resplendence, I hold
I was born in this world with a chip on my shoulder I think, a classic tale- orphan raised by the church in the town of December. I don't remember my parents, never knew them. A pastor raised me amongst the other kids. I suppose I was his favorite student, even if his lessons frustrated me. Those damn apples....
I am a preacher, a priest... but I am a sinner. I smoke, drink, gamble, kill, harm others, I feel greed and envy, lust, malice...you name it. Who am I do assure people, upon thrusting my makeshift chapel upon their heads for profit, that they are redeemed?
Who will tell my I'm redeemed in this final hour?
I've always held onto many truths, one being- no one is pure. Everyone is tainted in some manner. Purity is a myth, an ideal we like to believe in to get through the day. Everyone sins, everyone has something to atone for, and I can feel the weight of my sins like weights on my back. My Cross Punisher, the weapon of my sins, the icon of my atonement, this is the weight I suffer, the cross I bare.
I tell myself my killing those who sinned was okay, that it was punishment. Who am I to judge others sins? I, who've lied my way into gaining trust, who would kill even a child.
But for a moment, whenever I saw her, I could almost believe in purity, in goodness, in perfection...she gave me that feeling of peace every time I looked into those big, mossy green eyes. I always despised green, a color of sin and betrayal, but she makes me find peace in it.
Her hair so gold like honey. I smile at that thought. When I call 'honey', I wonder if she knew I was referring to hair aside from her sweet, almost childlike at times disposition. Even she...I know she has barely held onto innocence, the large gun has dirtied her hands, but still she makes me believe that the sun can shine just a bit brighter over cold shadows.
For her, I would take all the small sins she has committed, take them into me and redeem her along with myself. I love her that much to add her sins to mine. I would take everything into myself for this one last moment of atonement.
My final act of redemption.
Honey....
Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one
Your sins into me
As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness
(Your sins into me) Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one
That needle-noggin, that Vash the Stampede, he was the reason I came to them. I was to act as spy. On the bus I had talked, argued, fought with him against those metal creatures, and when it all said and done I decided to sit next to her, my honey, Millie.
I rested my head against hers, murmuring she was nice and comfy, and slept. Peacefully. She smelled sweet, like flowers and chocolate. No matter how times I parted ways from them, I would always remember that lingering scent.
Every time I saw her, it was like a small miracle. Her big smile...she was so cute, even though at the very moment I was a bit frazzled by it, when she was upset over losing out on pudding. I couldn't help though, buying her a whole bagful. She was so happy, my honey.
I remember drinking with her, and she almost stripped. Too bad her partner got in the way, though I wouldn't have minded a private strip show.
Then the time we were helping those kids and pretended to be a married couple. I almost didn't
want to pretend. Light, like the flutter of wings, feel your hollow voice rushing into me
As you're longing to sing
So I... I will paint you in silver, I will wrap you in cold
I will lift up your voice as I hold
I would have married her. After all of this business with Legato and Knives, I would have wanted to take her to December. The children would have loved her, how could anyone not love her? I would have asked her then, to be by my side forever, to love me forever.
I would have married her right away, because I know it would be right.
I wish I could have the chance....
My cigarette is almost burnt out. I suppose I should have expected this. Though I'm pretty sure it wasn't Chapel, he was being controlled. Legato most likely. He wouldn't ever honestly kill me. I was Chapel's prized pupil...but I guess that doesn't matter.
Blood spills, gun smoke clears, I carry my cross to the church to lay myself before God. I lean against my cross, it supports me. I become its weight. Ash from my cigarette falls to the floor.
No, I want more time. It's too soon. I want to stay with them a bit longer...
It's getting dark...I think of her.
My honey.
Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one, now
Your sins into me
As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness
(Your sins into me) Your sins into me
I'm sorry, Vash. For my deceitful intentions.
I'm sorry, Meryl. For getting you deeper involved in all this mess.
I'm sorry, Millie. For not having the chance to say I loved you. I would have stayed with you as long as you would have me.
I want more time...but my sins have caught up with me.
My time is up.
It's cold.
Cold in life's throws, I'll fall asleep for you
Cold in life's throws, I only ask you turn away
Cold in life's throws, I'll fall asleep for you
Cold in life's throws, I only ask you turn
As they seep... into me, oh, my beautiful one, now
Be happy, honey, be happy and forget all this. Everything. Knives. Legato. The Gun-ho Guns. Please know happy thoughts, and if you can spare a moment someday, think of me fondly. With a smile, remember good times.
I will always cherish my memories of you. Your smile, your eyes, your scent, the feel of your
skin. I will remember the one time I sweetly sinned with you, when flesh became one, bodies writhing. I
will remember the sweet taste of your lips, the soft whisper of your voice, the silken honey gold hair,
and your warm shoulder where I once rested my head. Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one
Your sins into me
As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness
(Your sins into me)
Your sins into me... oh
Redeem her, God. For she truly is the closest thing to purity I have ever known. She is my angel, my light. To leave her now is too much, but I know....my time is up. Let her know happiness, peace...
Let her shine always, a light in the darkness. Do whatever you wish to my scarred soul, I will burn in sin in the hereafter as long as she is happy.
But oh, how I want to be with her longer. To hear her happily say 'Mr. Priest' as she sees me, and to perhaps have her one day call me 'Nick'.
A life I'll never have with her now.
I life that would have been perfect.
Oh honey...I'm sorry.
We can't be together after all. We'll never have a family.
I would have married you.
The ashes fall, and I barely notice the cigarette fall from my lips. It's dark and cold now, but I don't feel it. I see only her in my mind.
And everything fades.
Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one, now
Your sins into me
As a rapturous voice escapes, I will tremble a prayer
And I'll beg for forgiveness
(Your sins into me) Your sins into...
(Your sins into me) Your sins into me
Oh, my beautiful one
Goodbye, Honey. I will always love you.
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::Authoress sobs hysterically::
Fucking Legato!!! He killed my precious Wolfwood!!! ::sobs::
But yes, this is something I HAD to write. There was no way I couldn't. This idea has been in my mind for over a year and half and I thought this song 'Silver and Cold' by afi was perfect.
