Disclaimer: I own nothing from General Hospital. This is for amusement purposes only, and I hope that you all enjoy. :D

Summary: Elizabeth Webber is trying to move forward with her life after the Nurses Ball, but the future seems so distant when the past is so determined to keep pulling her back.

Pairings: Mentions of Liason, Lusam, Jasam and more

Alternative History: This is set in December, 2014. Anything that has happened after that point is null and void and has absolutely no bearing on this story. Major facts you will need to know straight off the bat is: Elizabeth told the truth at the Nurses Ball. She also didn't switch Danny's DNA test. Franco did, and he is in an asylum after the stint him and Nina pulled with Ava's baby, and hasn't been let out so he isn't even in the picture. Elizabeth wasn't in Jason's orbit ever since he got back with Sam, because while Jason forgave her, Elizabeth never could. The only time the pair had contact was when he rescued her from Ewen, and that was it. Liz only married Ric once, never considered marrying him again until 2012-14 period. Liz only married Lucky twice, but at their second wedding, she got sick and postponed it. By the time it came around, Liz and Lucky had parted ways. Lucky and Liz reunion did not happen in 2009, and Nicolas never acted upon his feelings for Liz in 2010 no Niz affair. Any other changes will be explained throughout the story. Hope you all enjoy.

Warnings: This is not Lucky, Sam, Monica, Maxie, Carly friendly. There may be more, but those are the few that came immediately to mind. If you are fan of these characters, then you may wish not to read it. Abandon ship now. Don't say you weren't warned later. Also this isn't romance heavy, so don't expect much of that. It's more of a drama-focused on that, with Elizabeth moving forward, but the past and a web of lies keeps trying to pull her down. There will be mentions of past romances or ongoing romances, but they aren't the centerpiece here.

This is a full length story by the way, but it will say "complete" until I finish writing the rest of it. When I start adding chapters, I'll change the complete to incomplete.

SHE DON'T WANT THE WORLD

By ThroughtheMirrorDarkly

Chapter One

"Letting Go of the Past Doesn't Mean the Past Let's Go of You"

Snow fell from the heavens down on to Port Charles for the fourth day in the row, and the snowplows came roaring down the highway almost every hour on the hour, the loud engines cutting through the quiet night. Elizabeth Webber stood at the top of the roof of General Hospital, soaking in the cold air using it to dampen the rage that simmered inside of her heart. With dark long and wavy hair that framed a gentle face and soft-squared jaw, some might say that she looked like an angel with blue eyes so bright they seemed to reflect the very heavens. Though Elizabeth was the first to correct such a notion, knowing that she was no perfect angel, and that she had made more than her fair share of mistakes—mistakes that seemed to come back to haunt her. Perhaps if she had been bold, instead of hiding behind lies to protect and shield her heart then her life wouldn't be where it was right now.

Jason Morgan was alive. The man that had been living under her roof as Jake Doe had indeed Jason Morgan. She would never forget the way Nicolas's admission had felt like a knife to the gut—a burning white hot knife—and how that moment fractured the image she had of her friend forever. He had attempted to manipulate her, tried to burden her with his lie, and then in the next breath said he didn't care if she told the truth.

So she did.

She had pulled Jake, Sam, and Patrick aside at the Nurses Ball, and told them what Nicolas had revealed. The shocked look on Nicolas's face clearly told him that he had expected her to lie, and maybe in a different life and time she would have. She felt embarrassed, scarred by what Ric done, and she felt herself on the edge of an abyss. It would have been painfully easy to just slip off the cliff, and just let herself sink downward. But would she be able to get back up? She had fallen so many times before that she didn't feel like she could get back up if she fell again. All that happened just made her all that more painfully aware of the mistakes she had made in trying to find happiness in her life. Ever since Jason left her at the courthouse, Elizabeth's heart had hardened against love in way that had never happened before. It forced her to open her to the fact that fairytales were just that: tales. And sometimes love just wasn't enough.

Lucky had attempt to mend their relationship when she had gotten sick from that toxin that Trevor Lansing had brought into the hospital back a few years ago, but Elizabeth shut him down. She couldn't risk her heart on him again, and Lucky had been furious. Still to this day, he was angry and bitter towards even though he had married Rebecca Shaw, Emily's look-a-like. And Elizabeth always knew that Nicolas had started to feel something more than friendship for her, but thankfully he never acted upon it. Elizabeth couldn't give him what he wanted, not when she didn't know if she was capable of trying to love someone like that again. Matt Drake certainly had been interested, but he had been also pursing Maxie so Elizabeth wasn't getting anywhere near that.

Then there had been Ewen. Sweet, understanding Ewen that ended up kidnapping her after she found out he was working with Jerry Jacks to poison the town. Elizabeth was near ready to give up on love, and she didn't know why she even thought things would go right with Ric. One trip down the aisle, and the disaster of their marriage had been enough. Elizabeth let the past take foothold in her present, and got drawn in again by a what if. For a blink of an eye, it had been alright. She could see the good man that she knew Ric was always capable of being, then he "died" and several months later, when Jake Doe had come into her life, Ric miraculous returned. She felt obligated to try with him since he had been through so much. It was doomed from the start, especially given the reason she wanted to be with him wasn't because she loved him, but was an attempt to distance herself from the feelings she had for Jake Doe, whom she believed married to Hayden Barnes. Except he wasn't, he was married to Sam and that made it all the much worse.

Ric's death and returned affected her, after all she wasn't cold hearted. But Jason's…

Jason's tore down her world in ways that only he ever could.

It brought up all those feelings, those broken promises and dreams. It brought up the pain and hurt when Jason had waltzed back into Sam's arms, forgiving her for all she put them through, but Elizabeth didn't. Elizabeth couldn't. Like she said, she wasn't perfect, but for fuck's sake, Sam didn't have those 'moments of weakness' because she was hurt. She did it because she was vindictive and vengeful. If it had been actual hurt that had caused Sam's downward spiral, Elizabeth could have understood it because Elizabeth's had a few of her own, but it wasn't no matter how much Sam liked to rewrite history to paint herself in a better light. And Elizabeth pities anyone who buys that act.

Drawing in a slow deep breath, Elizabeth held the cold air in her lungs in attempt to stave off the flames of retribution that simmered in her blood. The fallout from the truth had gone as well as could be expected. Joy and disbelief from all those who held Jason dear in their life, and of course, Jake Doe all, but vanished underneath the heap of expectation placed upon him by said people. Elizabeth had kept her distance, refusing to be wrongfully accused of trying to sink her claws into Jason. Carly had attempt to say that Elizabeth would just use the time she took Jake Doe in as a means to do just that, but Elizabeth shut her down, harshly pointing out that the only person who had Jake Doe's back since he woke up had been her. Through all the Helena brainwashing and his time in jail, Elizabeth had believed him when no one else would. Hell even, Sam said that Jake Doe was nothing like Jason. How quickly she changed her tune.

It had been a couple of months since the Nurses Ball, but it felt like a lifetime. Everyone was still speaking about Jason's revival, and Nicolas had left for Greece under fire from everyone for his hand in keeping Jason's identity a secret. Elizabeth was ready for the next big scandal to come through because every time that nosy Amy would try to pry information out of Elizabeth about her role in Jason's life gave her an instant migraine and honestly tested her self-control. A lesser woman would have strangled and beaten Amy within an inch of her life by now. Elizabeth just skillfully dodged and avoided and would be ecstatic when she would be finally off the double shifts that Monica suddenly put her on. She supposed the older woman thought if Elizabeth had too much time on her hands, then she would be trying to use her "charms" to ensnare Jason. Too bad that everyone couldn't see, that Elizabeth had finally let that ship sail.

The only bright light in all the chaotic happens was Jake. Her son, Jake, was alive. Luke and Laura had confronted Helena one last time, and found him there on Cassidine Island. She had never felt so—happy, joyful, elated—when Luke ushered him into her home. He was older, obviously time did not stand still, but he was still her little boy. Her perfect little boy. She has so many questions about how this was possible, and if Nicolas had known, and what had happened to him. It was Laura who offered her advice, and told her not to make the mistakes that they had done with Lucky. To get him professional help, and be patient with him.

Tunneling her fingers through her hair, Elizabeth let out a weary sigh, knowing she was going to have to go back to work. She didn't want to. She escaped out of here so she didn't have to face Sam who was sitting with her sister, Kristina in the waiting room. Elizabeth heard Sam gush about how she and Jason were hoping to have a new addition to the family soon. A part of Elizabeth was upset by that, but not because she was jealous of Sam. No, because had it not been a few days before the Nurses Ball that Jake Doe had proclaimed his love for Elizabeth? Was she so easily forgettable? Done away with? She knew that he would try with Sam because Sam was his wife, but a little part of her hoped that she would have mattered a little more to not be so easily forgotten. Maybe she wouldn't care if things had been simple. If Jason hadn't left her feeling like the only reason they weren't together was because of the danger, like they were starcrossed lovers that only touch for a brief moment, but would always love each other. Maybe if there had been closure on the dreams she had with him, back all those years ago and now, then the cut to her soul would not bleed so keenly. But it was what it was, Elizabeth gave the skyline one last look before she headed back inside. The past had already been written, and Elizabeth was done trying to rewrite it.

No, the past held nothing for her. She had to forge ahead with a broken, but hopeful heart. She had to continue to be strong for Cameron, showing him that everything would be alright. She brushed the snow off the bottom of her shoes on the mat before she descended the stairs carefully, and it was all too soon that she reached the floor. She walked over the nurse's hub, which only had the new girl Amy who was talking quietly to Hayden Barnes—how did she even get a job here?— and immediately got herself to work. It had been a double shift she had to endure because the flu was going around, and she felt so guilty at having Georgie watching Cameron so much.

Georgie Jones had returned to town a few months ago after earning her Masters in Psychology. She had left town after an extremely frightful encounter with the Text Message Killer—who later turned out to be Diego Alcazar. If Spinelli hadn't found Georgie when he had, and done CPR, she would have likely been dead. While searching for a job, Georgie had been helping Elizabeth out with Cameron, and she was glad the younger woman put up with her. She really needed to do something nice for Georgie. Get her a gift card to a spa, or a nice arrangement from edible arrangements.

"Excuse me, Elizabeth?" Sam's voice broke through her thoughts.

Elizabeth almost slammed her head into the counter, repeatedly, but managed to stop herself. "How can I help you, Sam?" She asked, the words coming out nice and without a hint of the frustration bubbling beneath her surface.

"I was supposed to have an appointment with Kelly at six, but it's nearly seven. I was just wondering if you could tell me why I haven't been called back," Sam stated, softly. She stood there with her hands shoved into her jacket, and her sister Kristina stood off at the side with a rather sour expression on her face.

Why was Sam still here? And why does the universe make me have to deal with her? Elizabeth didn't allow her disgruntle feelings to show, and kept her face completely polite. She had constructed quite the mask throughout the years of dealing with women like Sam and Carly. They were like sharks wanting for the first sniff of blood in the water, and Elizabeth refused to give them the satisfaction. "She's still in with a patient who unexpectedly went into labor," Elizabeth commented, after checking the computer and she turned to look Sam square in the eye. "It may be a while longer due to some complications. I can reschedule your appointment if you wish."

"Yeah, right," Kristina huffed, arms crossed. "You just want to keep Sam from seeing her beca—"

"Kristina," Sam said, sharply. A faint color rose into her cheeks, almost like she was embarrassed, but then again, she was a former con-artist. She must have been quite the actress to pull off as much as she did so Elizabeth was uncertain of the sincerity of Sam's expression.

"There are number of open appointments for tomorrow. There are two in the morning, one at eight and another at ten. There is a later one in the afternoon around three, if that would better suit your schedule," Elizabeth commented, not batting an eyelash at Kristina and her remarks. Elizabeth arched a cold brow, looking down at the teenager girl. She had little doubt that Sam had filled the girl's head with an alternate version of history that painted Sam as the martyr and Elizabeth as the snake. But she was a misguided kid who wasn't even around when everything that happened between her, Jason and Sam went down all those years ago, and wasn't worth the effort.

Sam nodded her head. "That sounds fine," said the brunette, her tone quiet and soft. She always spoke in husky whispers which confused Elizabeth to no end. "The ten o'clock one sounds perfect. Jason should be able to come with me then."

"Alright. I will set it up and let Kelly know," Elizabeth said, simply. She had no visible reaction to that, and inwardly, the pang was dull. Elizabeth hoped that meant that the wound inside of her left by Jason was finally healing, but she could tell that Kristina had been hoping for something more than the simple acceptance that Elizabeth showed by the scowl on her face. "Is there anything else I can do for you?"

"Yes, actually," Sam said, pretending to hesitate. The only reason Elizabeth knew that it was false was because sometimes when Sam acted, she over-exaggerated her facial features, almost to the point that her expression were more comical than they were convincing. "I was wondering if Jake could come stay the night. Jason would really like to spend time with both of his sons."

Elizabeth stilled from head to toe. The momma bear in her snarled and clawed, vying to be free so she could rip the extension out of Sam's head one by one and Elizabeth barely managed to keep her calm. "I'm sorry, Sam, but that is not happening," she said, her tone firm and sharp.

"Jason is his father," Sam started, with an angry expression. "He has a right—"

"Sam, I have offered to let you and Jason meet up with Georgie or myself at the park with the boys. Jake has been through a lot," Elizabeth cut her off, frostily. Her expression showed there would be no such thing as compromise, and her lips thinned out into a firm line. "He doesn't feel safe anywhere, but at home. After what Helena put him through—"

"And whose fault is that?" Kristina snapped.

"Little girl, you need to stop before you land yourself in hot water," Elizabeth glowered down at the teenager. "This has nothing to do with you. Nothing at all, and I don't know why you are eager for a fight but I don't have the time to bother wasting on you," she said, her tongue cutting and without mercy. "And the answer is no, Sam. It will remain no, because Jake is going through too much, and I don't exactly trust you of all people with him."

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Kristina spat, red faced. As if princess purity had any right to judge her sister.

Sam blanched, all the color drained from her face. "I thought you had forgiven me."

"Jason forgave you. Jason," Elizabeth pointed out, a hard expression on her face. "Not me. You may have helped save Jake the second time, but you were also responsible for those unexpected visitors on our doorstep. Maybe it's cruel, maybe it's vindictive, but I've lost too much by trusting that others were capable of change. I'm not willing to lose anymore. I'm not willing to risk my child. I just got him back. I just can't," and like that the angry wind blew out of her sails, leaving her feeling exhausted and tired beyond belief. The last few months had taken a toll on Elizabeth leaving dark circles under her eyes, a sallow hue to her skin, and several pounds of weight lost leaving her to an almost unhealthy mass.

Sam stared at her with an indecipherable gaze, and opened her mouth, but Kristina spoke first. "Sam, you have nothing to be forgiven for! You have done nothing wrong. If anyone has done the wrong, it's Elizabeth. She standing there all high and mighty acting like Jason's too good to be her baby daddy, but maybe she should have thought about that before she climbed fifteen flights of stairs and spread her legs like a wh—"

"Kristina Marie Davis," Alexis Davis said, her tone the kind that only a disapproving mother could make. She had come to the hospital when Kristina had given her a vague text message about her and Sam being here, and had been worried. She had expected to find one of them hurt, but never in her wildest imagination would have thought of coming across Kristina talking to another person that way.

Kristina's face paled. "Mom, I—"

"Don't mom me, young lady. You apologize to Elizabeth right this second," Alexis stated, firmly.

"Why?" Kristina said, defiantly. "She is keeping Jason and Sam from seeing Jake, and—"

"A matter that has nothing to do with you, and your opinion has no bearing in it. If Elizabeth wants to keep Jason and Sam away, I'm sure she has her reasons," Alexis commented, with a quelling look at her middle child. "I expect better from you, Kristina. I did not raise you to attack, or treat others that way no matter what they've done or not done. And Sam, you should not better than to let your sister fly off the handle like that." Especially when you know the truth, went unsaid, but was clearly written in the look that Alexis tossed Sam. Alexis had been worried Sam would do some passive aggressive attack on Elizabeth, ever since Jason's return. It had only gotten worse when Jake was also found alive, and that's when Sam had gotten the bright idea to have another baby with Jason, pressing the issue at every turn. Alexis knew that it stemmed from insecurity because Jake Doe had been so close with Elizabeth, and Sam always felt like she had to destroy or marginalize the connection the two shared. She knew her daughter felt that having another baby would tie her more to Jason, and usurp Elizabeth completely out of Jason's life, but Alexis just had a feeling that in the end, Sam's action were going to drive 'the love of her life' away.

Sam's cheeks flushed, and she glared up at Elizabeth. "Jason and I will be talking to Diane about the situation with Jake," the brunette finally declared, darkly. She couldn't believe her own mother was defending Elizabeth, and that trapped animal feeling welled inside of her when she realized that Elizabeth had never forgiven her what she did to Jake. If the other woman wanted, she could destroy Sam's life with a single word and Sam just couldn't let that happen.

"Go ahead, Sam," Elizabeth said, with a dismissive tone. "It's not going to change a thing."

Sam marched off, and Kristina followed after before her mother could stop her. Alexis sighed, heavily, staring at the elevator in which her two daughters disappeared. "I swear I don't know what has gotten into the two of them. I'm sorry that they did that Elizabeth, and while Kristina might have been the one with the bite, I can't help to think that Sam was the bark," Alexis said, looking very exhausted. She had her own issues to deal with on top of running around trying to keep her children in check, especially with her being a suspect in a murder. "Sam has gotten it into her head that the reason Jason isn't taking to his old life well is because of you."

Elizabeth didn't know what to make of that. She didn't want to make anything of it. It would just make things infinitely more complicated. "From what I've seen Jason is perfectly happy with his old life," she stated, flatly. "He is Sonny's man once again."

"Working for Sonny is one thing, but when it comes to his home life? He doesn't want to help Sam look for baby beds, or baby clothes. He doesn't seem invested, and Sam is hurt so…" Alexis allowed Elizabeth to fill in the gaps for herself, and ran her hand down face. "I just don't want her to get hurt is all, and if that is where this is leading, I would appreciate to know so I can help ease the fallout for my daughter."

"Alexis, I don't intend of hurting anyone," Elizabeth told her, earnestly. She closed the patient file and squared her shoulders, before she raised her gaze to meet Alexis's. "I just want to be left alone. I want my boys and me to be left alone. Whatever I had with Jason, it's been over for years and while there was a spark of something with Jake Doe…now that I know that he is Jason, it's never going to happen. I don't see a future with him, and I don't think that anything is going to change any time soon."

Alexis gave her a scrutinizing look. "You aren't going to fight for him? I mean, you were on the verge of something with him before Ric showed up, and his fake wife, Hayden. I know there are feelings," the lawyer stated, not in the least bit judgmental.

"If Jason can't stand up, and say he isn't happy for himself, I can't do it for him. He's a grown man, capable of making his own decision, and if doesn't then he deserve what he gets. Besides, I won't beg someone to love me. I learned long ago that there is no use in desperate pleas to try and make someone stay," Elizabeth told her, with a heavy sigh. "I am not going to chase someone who doesn't know my worth, and I am not going to wait for someone who doesn't acknowledge my value. I shouldn't have to fight for love. I am worth more than that."

"I'm glad you know that. I know that failed relationship piled up onto ones shoulders can wear down a person's self-esteem, and better judgment. It's easy to slide into a never ending loop of mistakes instead of opening your eyes up, but for what it is worth, I think you could do better than men like Jason and Lucky," Alexis commented, with a wry smile. "Don't get me wrong…Jason is a nice son-in-law, but he's a bit…dense when it comes to the women in his life and how he treats them. I always felt that he doesn't give his all in his relationships, and holds back. I wanted more Sam, someone who would love her with everything, but she has her eyes set solely on Jason."

Believe me, the whole of Port Charles knows of Sam's obsession to be Jason's ride and die chick, Elizabeth thought, but didn't say that out loud. Alexis was being reasonable and kind, and there was no need to repay that with rudeness.

"And I'm sorry for pressing you. I know that this isn't…an ideal situation for anyone, and I know how it hurts to feel like you aren't enough," Alexis apologized, with a sympathetic look.

"You are Sam's mom. I understand you wanting to protect your child," Elizabeth said, easily forgiving Alexis. Out of everyone in Port Charles, Alexis had never looked down on Elizabeth for her past mistakes, and lapses in judgment. The only time they ever came head to head was when Alexis was Lucky's lawyer in the last divorce, and a few conversations pertaining to Sam back in 2007, but they were never impolite or hateful to one another. "But I really don't think you have anything to worry about, Alexis."

Alexis smiled. "I hope you are right, because sometimes, I look at Sam and I fear that she hasn't changed as much as I want to believe. When Jason was gone, I saw real growth in her as a person and now that he's back I'm afraid…" The older woman shook her head, slightly. "But that isn't your concern. It's mine. I'll let you get back to work. Take care, Elizabeth."

"You, too," Elizabeth replied, as Alexis made her way to the elevator. After the lawyer left, Elizabeth got to work updating a few patient charters as well setting up appointment for a few callers when her cellphone rang. It was the generic ring tong—a sound that she didn't often hear, because everyone in her call list had a personalized ringtone—and she pulled it out of her pocket. Elizabeth frowned, not recognizing the number. Hitting the answer button, she pressed the phone to her ear and said, "Hello?"

"Elizabeth, we need to talk," the deep, rich male voice curled against her ear.

Her heart lurched inside of her chest—sharp and painfully—and she drew in a panicked gasp. For a moment, she stood there at an utter loss at what to do. She hadn't heard that voice in so long, and the memories rushed over her in a tidal wave. "Me speaky no English. Very, very sorry," she said, in the worst imitation of an Asian accent and clicked the end call button on the phone. White hot embarrassment burned in her cheeks, and this sick, hollow feeling burrowed deep into her chest. Bringing her head down on the counter with an unforgiving smack, she was unabashed about the stares she received, and she whimpered, "Why am I the universe's butt monkey?"

No person nor the universe gave reply.

END OF CHAPTER!

Honestly? I have no idea where this will lead. I just started writing this one day, and this is what I got. I have a few ideas of where to take it, but until that time it say "complete" until I've written out the rest of it, and then I will start posting on it. I really just wanted to get you alls input and see what you thought about it, and see if any feedback feeds my muse. Another thing to note is that I've edited a great deal of Elizabeth's history. I edited pieces that I just felt were unnecessary plot points by the GH writers that did nothing, and the actions that I felt were not true to Elizabeth's character. So it is Alternative History, but still has a good deal of cannon as the foundation. Anyways, give me your thoughts and let me know what you think. RRs are appreciated.