A/N: Set 4th year, since Lily and Snape are still friends.
"Hey, Evans!" Sirius Black's voice cuts across the Gryffindor common room. The black-haired rebel is lounging on the couch in front of the fireplace, taking up the entire space. Lily is sitting at a nearby table, working on her Potions homework. She would have Sev help her on it, but he's busy catching up on Transfiguration. "Evans," Sirius calls again. She ignores him. Finally, he gets up and walks over to her table. "Evans." She rolls her eyes and continues writing. "EVANS!"
"WHAT?" She shouts back.
Sirius lowers his voice dramatically. "As you know, tomorrow is April Fool's Day, and I have a prank to play on James. It'll make him really angry, and James is funny when he's angry. But I need your help."
Despite herself, Lily is interested. A chance to upset Potter? She's in. "Okay."
Sirius sits down beside her and outlines his plan. "James walks in on us snogging." Lily waits for more, but he says nothing else.
"That's it?"
"Yup!" Sirius replies cheerfully.
Lily thinks about his proposition. Sirius would definitely not be her choice for her first kiss, but it would make Potter mad. Really, really mad. The look on Potter's face would even be worth the disgustingness of the situation. "Alright. But you're in charge of making sure Potter finds us." Lily pauses. "And there is one more condition. Let me kiss someone else first. I wouldn't like my fist kiss to be with the infamous playboy Black."
Sirius rolls his eyes and agrees.
Later that night, Lily sets out on a mission. She's going to find Severus. She eventually stumbles upon him in a hallway –a deserted hallway, mind you- and smiles.
"Hey, Sev."
"Hi, Lily."
Then she remembers what she's here for and she blushes. "So… Black wants me to help him with a prank." Severus is silent. "And it involves kissing."
Nothing happens for a moment, then Severus shouts, "WHAT?"
Lily looks down and mutters, ",BlackImean,thenPotter'llgetreallymad."
Severus takes a moment to sort out her words and then, to her surprise, nods. "Why are you here?" He asks.
Lily blushes and says, "I didn't want Black to be my first kiss."
Severus' mouth drops open in shock (and joy). "You've never kissed anyone before?"
"No. Have you?"
"No." He sounds indignant for some reason. "But you didn't tell me why you're here."
Lily is surprised. She had thought she'd made her intentions clear. "Kiss me, Severus."
His eyes widen. "What?"
"Kiss me."
He stares at her. Then, in one motion, he steps closer and slams his mouth onto hers.
Lily is surprised by the intensity of his kiss. He wraps his arms around her waist and pulls her roughly closer. After a few more seconds, however, he pulls away, keeping his arms around her waist. "Please don't do it," he says. Then he ducks down and presses his lips below her jaw.
"Do what?" She breathes distractedly.
"The prank," he murmurs.
"No, I'm doing it. I promised Sirius."
Severus pulls all the way away this time. "So he's Sirius now, is he? What happened to Black?" His voice is bitter.
Lily stares at him, astonished. "You sound angry!" She looks closer at his expression. "You're not… jealous, are you?"
"What?" He lies indignantly. "No!" His voice quiets. "I just don't like the idea of you and Black snogging. Who knows what he'll do to you?"
The red-haired girl sighs. "I'll be fine, Severus." The boy struggles to keep his face calm, and, failing, strides around the corner and back to the Slytherin Common Room.
James is in europhia. Why is he in europhia? Well, Sirius just told him that Lily wants to meet him (James, not Sirius) in a deserted section of the library later. In is excitement, James has completely forgotten the date: April 1. And trust me, a Marauder never forgets April Fool's Day, or he will pay.
Lily is very nervous. She takes a shaky breath. This is it. Black said Potter'd be here at seven, and it is six fifty-five. They have to start now in case Potter comes early.
Sirius Black stands in front of her. "C'mon Evans, just think of what James' face is going to look like."
Lily thinks. She can already see Potter's astonished expression. Her resolve hardens. Potter is finally going to get what he deserves after all of these years of asking her out and torturing Severus.
She stands on her toes and kisses Black. As she does, Remus Lupin rounds the corner behind her. Sirius' eyes widen as he sees his friend. Remus backs away slowly, then turns and runs.
Lily, unaware that they had been spotted, continues to stand awkwardly, with her lips pressed to Black's. Come on Potter… Any day now…
And Potter emerges from behind a bookshelf at Sirius' back. As soon as he sees them he drops the bouquet he had been carrying. He looks nauseous. Lily stares at the boy without moving. Then she slowly moves away from Sirius, moving carefully so as not to alarm James, who looks like a startled (and more than slightly jealous) deer. "April Fool's?" She almost-asks. Sirius turns around to face his best friend.
"Sirius?" James gasps, and Lily realizing that he James hadn't been able to see who she was kissing because the bookcase was in his line of vision.
Sirius just smirks. "That's another one on my list, mate!" He whistles cheerfully as he strolls away. What list? Lily wonders. Then it comes to her. Black's snog list of girls he'd kissed. So that's why he did this!
"Sirius Black, I am going to kill you!" Lily and James shout at the same time. Sirius runs away as fast as his legs can carry him.
Lily just turns to James, who looks like he's about to run after Sirius, and says formally, "It is my opinion that we should work together to make Black pay for his actions." James nods just as formally and the shake hands.
They spend the week planning. Sirius, knowing that they are up to something, is jumpy and continually looking over his shoulder. Peter is a traitor, so I don't even care what he's doing at this point. Remus just mopes around, dejected. Severus is angry. How could she? Kiss him and then go snog Black, and spend the week with Potter! Severus looks around the Slytherin Common Room. Maybe it's time to make some new friends. He wouldn't be feeling this way if Lily weren't his whole life.
Lily and James' revenge come on the eighth. That is when, mysteriously, a rumor spreads around the school that Sirius Black is in love with Severus Snape. That is James' doing. Lily disapproves of James' choice of the object of Sirius' imaginary affections, but he assures her that this will make the most impact.
The next morning in the Great Hall, Sirius is enraged. Several girls have come up to him to ask if it is true- is the great Sirius Black truly in love with Snivellus? He isn't, of course. Sirius decides to make an announcement to the entire student body. He stands on the table, casts a Sonorus charm on himself, and begins to speak.
Unbeknownst to him, Lily is casting a complicated spell that will make him say the opposite of what he is trying to say.
Some of you may have heard a certain rumor about me, Sirius tries to say.
"Some of you may not have heard a certain rumor about me," reverberates throughout the hall.
And I assure you, it is not true.
"And I assure you, it is true."
I hate Severus Snape!
"I love Severus Snape!"
Everyone is laughing, except for Severus and Sirius. When the latter realizes what he just said, he shouts, "James Potter and Lily Evans, I am going to give birth to you!" Now even Severus is laughing.
In front of the entire hall, James turns to Lily and asks, "Evans, will you go out with me?"
"NO!"
A/N: And... Lily goes back to "hating" James.