I just wanna say this before we start: I am insane,
considered so by myself and 99% of all people I know.
So is my humor. Not "Sick Insane," but more along the
lines of... well... actually, I think I may have invented
a new type of humor. If you don't like it, well, I probably
deserved that. If you do, then that's fine too, and better
for me than if you don't. Now, this is done in play format,
and the cast is actually from both LUNAR games. Also, I
don't own the LUNAR series or any of its characters, so
don't get me in trouble!!!
SCENE ONE: GHALEON'S PERIL
CAST:Quark
Jean
Master Mel
Ghaleon (duh)
Hiro
Lucia
Leo
Ramus
SETTING:Quark's Cave
As we open, Quark is seen asleep in his cave and a
smaller figure is laying down, shadowed by Quark. Suddenly,
there is a knock at the door (Quark had one installed after
the "Ghaleon Incident").
*Knocking*
*Knocking harder*
*Knocking furiously*
*Door falls off*
Hiro: Hello? Quark? Come on! I thought we were gonna
watch the Super Bowl today!
Lucia: What's a "Super Bowl?"
Hiro: Basically, a buncha humans get in a stadium and beat
the @#$% outta each other until someone crosses a line with
a ball.
Lucia: Oh.
Hiro: Doesn't it sound fun to watch?
Lucia: "Fun?" What is... "fun?"
Hiro: Never mi...
*A loud roaring sound is heard*
Quark: Who the @#$% is it?! Eh?! Oh. *snore*
*Quark roles over on the shadowy figure*
Muffled Voice: Git the @#$% offa me, ya' @#$%!
*The sound of flesh being cut is heard*
Quark: ALTHENA, IT HURTS!!!
*Quark jumps up off of the shadowed figure and we see it's
Mel*
Lucia: Hiro, what does @#$% mean?
Hiro: I'll tell ya' later.
Lucia: @#$%. @#$%. That's a fun word. @#$%. @#$%!!!
Hiro: It's about time ya' woke up, Quark! The game started
an hour ago!
Quark: Ugh... I think I got a hangover. Hmm...? Mel? What're
ya' doin' 'ere?
Mel: I dunno. I was at the bar, then I woke up here.
*Suddenly, the entire place rumbles, and the group is pelted
with ice balls from the ceiling*
*The Destiny crashes through the cave wall and chunks of rock
hit Quark in the head*
Quark: @#$%!!!
Lucia: I like the @#$% word! @#$%!
*Jean and Leo hop off of the Destiny, followed soon by FatRamus*
Jean: Hi, guys, what's up?
Lucia: @#$%, Jean, @#$%!
Ramus: Leo, what's her problem?
Leo: Nothing, really. She's just stupid, that's all.
Ramus: Oh. Anyway. QUARK! Do you have any more diamonds?
Quark: Yeah, actually, I feel some coming on right now.
*As Quark says this, a barrage of crap-diamonds fly from his @#$%,
several sharp ends piercing Ramus*
Ramus: I think I'm dying!
*Just at that moment, Ghaleon appears from nowhere (he's rather
good at that... too good...)*
Ghaleon: *Laughs demonically* I can speed that up for you! *More
demonic laughter*
*Ghaleon shoots about a million volts of electricity, and it
probably would finish Tubby, except for one thing...*
*Quark turns in Ghaleon's direction, and, without a word, barfs
all over him*
Ghaleon: AAAAAAAGH! IT BURNS! WHAT IS THIS, ACID?!?!?!?!?!
Quark: *Barfs on Ghaleon again*
*Suddenly, Ghaleon disappears as quickly as he came*
Ramus: Thank you, Quark. You really saved me.
Quark: *If you haven't guessed what happens next, please do so now*
Ramus: SEARING PAIN! MY EYE! MY ARMS! MY WHOLE @#$% FAT BODY!!!
Ramus: ...
Lucia: @#$%!
Leo: Let's get outta here!
Jean: Hurry!
*Hiro grabs Lucia and follows Leo and Jean's lead, Lucia chanting
"@#$%" all along. Quark stands in the middle of the cave, puke spewing
from his mouth like a firehose plus four. Oh, and if you're wondering
what happened to Mel, he was hit by the Destiny when it crashed through*
considered so by myself and 99% of all people I know.
So is my humor. Not "Sick Insane," but more along the
lines of... well... actually, I think I may have invented
a new type of humor. If you don't like it, well, I probably
deserved that. If you do, then that's fine too, and better
for me than if you don't. Now, this is done in play format,
and the cast is actually from both LUNAR games. Also, I
don't own the LUNAR series or any of its characters, so
don't get me in trouble!!!
SCENE ONE: GHALEON'S PERIL
CAST:Quark
Jean
Master Mel
Ghaleon (duh)
Hiro
Lucia
Leo
Ramus
SETTING:Quark's Cave
As we open, Quark is seen asleep in his cave and a
smaller figure is laying down, shadowed by Quark. Suddenly,
there is a knock at the door (Quark had one installed after
the "Ghaleon Incident").
*Knocking*
*Knocking harder*
*Knocking furiously*
*Door falls off*
Hiro: Hello? Quark? Come on! I thought we were gonna
watch the Super Bowl today!
Lucia: What's a "Super Bowl?"
Hiro: Basically, a buncha humans get in a stadium and beat
the @#$% outta each other until someone crosses a line with
a ball.
Lucia: Oh.
Hiro: Doesn't it sound fun to watch?
Lucia: "Fun?" What is... "fun?"
Hiro: Never mi...
*A loud roaring sound is heard*
Quark: Who the @#$% is it?! Eh?! Oh. *snore*
*Quark roles over on the shadowy figure*
Muffled Voice: Git the @#$% offa me, ya' @#$%!
*The sound of flesh being cut is heard*
Quark: ALTHENA, IT HURTS!!!
*Quark jumps up off of the shadowed figure and we see it's
Mel*
Lucia: Hiro, what does @#$% mean?
Hiro: I'll tell ya' later.
Lucia: @#$%. @#$%. That's a fun word. @#$%. @#$%!!!
Hiro: It's about time ya' woke up, Quark! The game started
an hour ago!
Quark: Ugh... I think I got a hangover. Hmm...? Mel? What're
ya' doin' 'ere?
Mel: I dunno. I was at the bar, then I woke up here.
*Suddenly, the entire place rumbles, and the group is pelted
with ice balls from the ceiling*
*The Destiny crashes through the cave wall and chunks of rock
hit Quark in the head*
Quark: @#$%!!!
Lucia: I like the @#$% word! @#$%!
*Jean and Leo hop off of the Destiny, followed soon by FatRamus*
Jean: Hi, guys, what's up?
Lucia: @#$%, Jean, @#$%!
Ramus: Leo, what's her problem?
Leo: Nothing, really. She's just stupid, that's all.
Ramus: Oh. Anyway. QUARK! Do you have any more diamonds?
Quark: Yeah, actually, I feel some coming on right now.
*As Quark says this, a barrage of crap-diamonds fly from his @#$%,
several sharp ends piercing Ramus*
Ramus: I think I'm dying!
*Just at that moment, Ghaleon appears from nowhere (he's rather
good at that... too good...)*
Ghaleon: *Laughs demonically* I can speed that up for you! *More
demonic laughter*
*Ghaleon shoots about a million volts of electricity, and it
probably would finish Tubby, except for one thing...*
*Quark turns in Ghaleon's direction, and, without a word, barfs
all over him*
Ghaleon: AAAAAAAGH! IT BURNS! WHAT IS THIS, ACID?!?!?!?!?!
Quark: *Barfs on Ghaleon again*
*Suddenly, Ghaleon disappears as quickly as he came*
Ramus: Thank you, Quark. You really saved me.
Quark: *If you haven't guessed what happens next, please do so now*
Ramus: SEARING PAIN! MY EYE! MY ARMS! MY WHOLE @#$% FAT BODY!!!
Ramus: ...
Lucia: @#$%!
Leo: Let's get outta here!
Jean: Hurry!
*Hiro grabs Lucia and follows Leo and Jean's lead, Lucia chanting
"@#$%" all along. Quark stands in the middle of the cave, puke spewing
from his mouth like a firehose plus four. Oh, and if you're wondering
what happened to Mel, he was hit by the Destiny when it crashed through*