It was a week after the events involving the Diamonds and Homeworld. For the most part, things were relatively normal, and by normal we mean absolute chaos because of all the newly uncorrupted Crystal Gems. Everyone was up to their own shenanigans, having a grand ol' time and such, except for our gay space rock farmers living at the barn. Everything was going well at the barn until recently, due to Peridot deciding out of nowhere she would try shapeshifting again, and well, it worked for the most part, though there were MAJOR downsides.
:Peridot one day found an old laptop, which was not in the best conditions while wandering about in Beach City. Looking at the device, she'd decided to take it back to the barn and proceed to repair it. It took hours to restore the device back into good conditions, but the work payed off. The laptop looked brand new, as if it was fresh out from box or store that it was in. She proceeded to praise herself, telling herself how great and smart she is, and then pressed the power on device. It was low on battery. Frustrated, Peridot prowled around Beach City looking for someone who could help her with her laptop's problem. She spotted Ronaldo, and proceeded to follow him to where he regularly hung out with his tech equipment and such. Once inside of Ronaldo's place, with Ronaldo somehow not noticing at first, she attempted to grab the things she needed on a sly. Ronaldo immediately noticing Peridot, and became startled, before going into a defensive state, he shrieked out in fear, "YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE AAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHH", as he started to charge towards Peridot. Peridot proceeded to defend herself by yeeting a bunch of metal stuff at Ronaldo, knocking him out instantly, and steeling his laptop's charger.
Peridot got back to the farm after a while, Lapis was there resting and lifted her head up when she noticed Peridot was back, she wanted to question was Peridot was up to, but decided to wait and see. Peridot brought the charger to the laptop and plugged it in, getting ready to start her adventure on the internet. She clicked the browser, the internet browser, it was slow as fuck, like Internet Explorer on Windows XP trying to load Sherwood Dungeon or Poptropica, it was agonizingly sluggish. "F U CK", Peridot yelled, as she got up and ventured her way back towards Ronaldo's place. He was still out cold, he might be breathing, might not be, Peridot didn't care she was just there to find the stuff needed to solve her internet problem. She spotted then stole a few wires and Ronaldo's newly bought internet router.
Once back on the farm, Peridot fixes everything up, and goes online. She browses the internet for a while, but then,...she finds THE HELLSITE, no, not Tumblr, but the OTHER hellsite. She scrolls down the front page of the site, seeing multiple poorly drawn men and women with unnaturally cheeks, she finds it all intriguing, then an idea pops into her head.
The Next Day, Around Evening
Lapis is wondering around, watering the crops, watering Pumpkin, and just generally hanging around when she notices something. She hasn't seen Peridot in almost the entire, she becomes slightly nervous. Usually Peridot would be hanging around her, talking to her, or they'd be watching Camp Pining Hearts together. The fact that Peridot has not come out the barn for quite a while concerned her greatly. She started to make her approach to the barn, holding her breath, though she really didn't need to. She slowly opened the doors to the barn and what she saw next shook her greatly. "what the actual fuck", Lapis whispered gaping at what she saw in front of her. She saw Peridot, but for some reason she was dummy thicc. "Lapis help", Peridot said, Lapis immediately approached her with fear and concern, "What is it? Are you hurt?", Lapis asked. Peridot replied, "well, no I'm not". Lapis asked, clearly confused, "then what's the problem". Peridot sighed, and proceeded to walk, clapping noises accompanying her every movement. "I'm dummy thicc and the clap of my asscheeks keep alerting Homeworld and the Diamond authority", replied Peridot. Immediately after Peridot's reply, the duo hear the sound of ships coming from the sky. They immediately sprint out the barn, with erratic clapping noises to accompany.
They're here.