Disclaimer: I own nothing. I am not making any money off this (sadly). Please don't sue me for I have nothing of value!
I saw a picture a friend of mine drew of Lulu. It was a very simple pencil sketch, but it was perfect! What caught my attention, however, was the look in her eyes, very sad and faraway. I wondered what our Sorceress might be thinking so this is my take on it.
All In Her Eyes
Silently she stands, facing away from the group. The others are talking in low, hushed voices, stealing glances at her and wondering why she would always remove herself so far from any personal contact. She can hear them though. Don't they realise what perfect hearing she has? Still, what they think does not matter. Not a lot matters these days.
Lulu's posture tells of her pride and self-confidence, her face gives a cold expression to the barren landscape in front of her, as if challenging it to rise and defy her. She looks for all the world as if nothing could ever really worry her. Every movement, every word she says strengthens this image, but her eyes tell her story. Her eyes call her a liar.
In her eyes though, there is deepness. The knowledge of things she did not ever need to know or the sight of things she should not have seen. There is the insurmountable sorrow hidden by pretend coolness, and the strain of trying to appear to be unaffected. There is the impending death of her Summoner, for a start. Yes, it's her job, but that doesn't mean she has to like it. She will do it but never like it. So much loss! She has so much power yet is powerless to prevent anything, just to help to maintain an endless cycle of misery, pain and death. Cold wind blows on her face, whipping strands of loose hair across her cheeks but she seems not to feel them, much as she has trained herself not to feel emotions after….his…death. It's harsh, and it's unfair. All she really wants is for peace without the need for this…this stupidity! Of course she knows the stories and the legends, and she supports the Summoner. This still doesn't give enough reason for anyone to HAVE to give their lives! It's pointless, really. Lulu hardly dares to hope that the stranger from Zanarkand may be able to find another way. The rage and helplessness storm inside her.
You couldn't see this, though. Not unless you had the courage to face the intimidating exterior, and dare to probe deeper into the woman buried under there. Into the feeling, living woman underneath the hard sorceress charade. It is easier not to feel. Much easier not to be attached. That's why the feelings of her Summoner's death are so frightening for her. Not just the depth of them, but that she has them at all. That the young, beautiful, generous and sometimes sweetly naïve girl will miss out on so much in life. Oh, she had her night with the young man from a city so long dead but that will be all she gets. And what of him after the event? Such a similar situation, to be left behind…
And the tragedy strikes her and she feels the tears starting. So she does what she always does. Pushes down the emotion and brings out the ice. Lulu turns, and speaks. She suggests they leave in a flat tone, and you cannot tell what she was thinking about before. Except in her eyes. It's all in her eyes.
Please R&R! If you like this, I may post further chapters detailing what I think other characters may be thinking so lemme know, ok?