Hi, my name is Tweek and my life is a joke and it seems like I'm the only one not laughing. I can't seem to do anything right. I can't pay attention. Everythings gross. I'm always a mess. My hair is all over the place. My confidence is at an all time low. I'll never find love. I can't pay attention. Did I already say that? Fuck...fuck I don't know man. Why am I even thinking about this? Oh yeah. I need to keep my mind occupied right now. There isn't really a reason why. Well, there is. I'm afraid that if I stop thinking about stupid meaningless shit than someone else might come into my head and control me and tell me what to do. What if it tells me to do something terrible! Jesus christ dude that's scary!
I'm at home right now, well it's not my home. I live with Craig. That's probably the only good thing I say that I have going on my life. Silver lining kind of shit. He just kinda keeps me around as a pet because I can't really work because loud noises and people I don't know talking to me kinda freaks me out. But I think it works out because I love to clean and Craig is probably one of the messiest people I've ever met in my life ever. Seriously I used to go over to his fathers house when he still lived with him and I would be ankle deep in trash when I stepped into his room. Well obviously I wouldn't step in there...too messy. One day I screamed until my face started to turn blue about how messy he was, and how he was going to attract rats and flies and mold and all kind of different shit. "Clean it if it bothers you." Was his reply. So I did. I ended up not minding it.
I feels good to be able to be useful.
Craigs had a troubled life like me. His was more physical though. His father was a drunk and liked to beat him and his sister every other night. I think his dad always blamed them for their mom leaving when Craig was 12 and his sister was 10. I think at one point Craig blamed himself too. He'd come to school with bruises and scratches over his face and arms. Sometimes black eyes and sometimes fat lips. Right before he turned 18 his sister Tricia ran away to live with her 23 year old boyfriend. That's kinda gross but Craigs father was so fucked up he didn't care. So on the day that Craig turned 18 he was out. He had been working part time jobs since he was 16 to make it happen. That's probably why he is the way he is now. I have never in my 20 years of life seen someone with such a lack of empathy. His give a fuck meter is basically just non existent.
We were friends since elementary school when things were still better for the both of us. I wasn't hopped up on the meds and Craig actually smiled on a daily basis. We both had a large circle of close friends who I wouldn't change for the world. I was the first one to turn. In the third grade my parents were concerned with my behavior in class and took me to the doctors. ADHD, OCD, depression, anxiety, and a slew of others that I didn't even know existed. I took more pills than I could count a day. I really took a toll on my body. I never played, I cried all the time, I was tired, sad, I just wanted to be alone. So, people left me alone. Who wanted to play with the 'sick kid?' Except Craig. He didn't mind sitting under the tree with me when I was having an episode of rage or tears because I couldn't control my emotions all the time. Or letting me copy notes when I fell asleep in class because my medicine caused drowsiness. It took a couple years for my body to get used to being suddenly pumped with drugs and by the time I came to terms with it, Craig was the one who was now struggling.
I let him stay at my house when his father was really bad and Craig was legitimately afraid for his life. I wiped his tears when he broke down crying when his mother left. Craig had the most beautiful hazel eyes, after that day they just looked dull and sunken.I fed him when there was no food at his house. I can't cook but my parents do own a coffee shop so I just stole the cakes and sandwiches and brought them to him when he needed them. So I was really happy when Craig turned 18 and moved out he asked me to come with him. I was only 17 and we were both in high school still but my parents would only allow it if I promised to take my pills.
But I stopped taking almost all of them. Honestly I think I'm doing better than now than when I was pill popping. I still have my moments. I still have my episodes. But I can say that I feel...happier? I'm still pretty much shit. But at least I'm slightly happy shit.
Maybe it's because I'm with my super best friend. That's what Stan and Kyle call each other right? They're butt buddies and I think they live together too? I haven't seen much of them since highschool. Craigs friends with them though. Stan and Craig work together at a car factory. It's damn good money. I would work there if I wasn't afraid that I would accidentally kill myself. Kyle's going to college. Go figure, he always was destined to be going somewhere in life. Good for him. That's rare here.
I'm waiting for Craig to get home now. He works second shift so he's gone pretty much the whole day. He usually gets home at about 11 at night. It's about that time now and I'm kinda excited about it. Like a puppy getting excited that their master is getting home. At least I'll have someone to talk to besides the voices in my head.
As on cue the soft jingling of the door knob and the door opening I looked over and saw Craig walk through the door. I had to make sure it was him, what if it was a killer or something?!
"Ah..Hi Caig!" I chimed, if I had a tail it would be wagging.
"Tweek. Hi." He replied. I always admired the way he talked. Not by the fact that he sounds to sotic. But how deep and soothing it is. Mine just sounds whiny and annoying. I guess it fits me after all. I noticed he had something in his hands, a box.
"What is that?" I asked from the small loveseat I'm in. I would have gotten up and gone closer to him but Craig smells so bad from oil and grease that I usually make him shower as soon as he gets home. Plus I can wash his dirty cloths. Clean is good.
" Food. I picked something up for you because I knew you probably didn't eat anything. It's your favorite, pasta."He tossed the box onto the counter. Craig is probably the only one who knows everything about me. He might even more about me than me. One time he stopped me from eating watermelon because I forgot that I was allergic to it.
I finally get up and head over to the box that Craig put on the table and opened it. Chicken fettuccine, it was my favorite. "S-shit Craig you didn't have to buy me food."
"I know. But I want to make sure you eat. I'm an ass but not that much of an ass." Great. Now I'm a pet that waits to get fed from their master. But I might cause fires if I cook so I better not.
Even before all the bullshit happened Craig had always been an asshole. He especially gotten really mean in high school. The most emotion I've ever seen Craig exhibit emotion was when he beat Cratmans ass for making fun of me so much that I had started to cry right in the middle of class. He kept calling me stupid and a junkie and that I should probably just kill myself because no one, not even Craig would want to deal with a sick in the head kid their whole life. Honestly the thought of Craig not wanting me was the real reason why I cried. Like shaking and not being able to breathe kind of crying. I was embarrassed, I was ashamed, but I couldn't stop the tears until there was the sudden sound of desks moving and a loud thud of Cartmans fat body on the floor and Craig looming over him. His face was red and his jaw was clenched from sheer anger. He took my hand and we just both walked out of the classroom. He cleaned me up without saying a word while I just stood there in front of him being a pathetic shriveling bitch. I remember his larger hands quickly wiping the big tears away from my pale cheeks. Craigs only 6 foot 2, only 6 inches taller than me but that day he seemed like a giant. Craig got 2 weeks of detention for that stunt but he later told me it was totally worth it. Eric deserved it anyway.
I'll never forget that day. It meant a lot. I just wish I could have stood up for myself instead of having Craig to do it for me.
I motioned for Craig to step back so I don't smell him. Foul smells make me gag. Craig response with a dramatic roll of his eyes and does what is told and took a step back. I took a bite of the food, it was pretty good. It reminded how hungry I really am. So creamy and the chicken was tender...delicious. I could eat pasta and garlic bread all day. "Thanks Craig. N-now go take a shower before you stink up the whole place. I'll lay clothes out for you." Without saying anything the taller, raven haired man walked past and into the bathroom. I'm probably the only one on this planet that could tell Craig to something without getting dirty looks or threats. I only use that power for good I swear.
I hear the shower start to run in the background and I take my time with eating. Craig takes his time in the shower anyway. What does he do in there anyway? Think about life or something? I don't know. I know I take a long time because I have to get every inch of my body clean before I even think about getting out. I don't think Craig has that same issue.
When I finish my late night dinner I head into Craigs room, it's the master bedroom and at the end of the hallway. Right next to it is my room and then the bathroom. I grab him some pajamas. Just a large white shirt and some dark blue pajama pants. No underwear. He doesn't wear those to bed. Yuk. I open the bathroom door and clear my throat, to make it known that I'm in there. But it was the same moment that the water shut off and the shower curtain flung back and a drippy wet Craig was there looking at me.
"J-JESUS CHRIST DUDE! Didn't you see me in here?!" I turned my head away, but not before getting a good glimpse of the man in front of me.
Craig is such a good looking guy. Slightly tanned, he soaks up all the sun like a magnet. His body is well toned, he lifts a lot of heavy stuff at work, he has clear skin, a nice jawline, nice hair, he keeps his short on the sides and a bit longer on the top. If looks can kill then he'd be in jail. I wonder why he doesn't have a girlfriend, I hope it's not because I'm here...oh god now I'm suddenly starting to feel bad about myself.
I don't think I look good at all...My blonde hairs shaggy I can't remember the last time I brushed it. I'm as pale as can be, I would think my shamrock colored eyes would look cute if they weren't surrounded by darkened and tired looking skin. I have no muscle tone, I'm kinda lanky. Definitely not cute at all. I may not like people but I would like to find love someday...too bad I probably won't. Not with looks like this.
"Yeah...I did. So what? We used to take baths together, remember?" Craig gave a shrug and wrapped himself in a towel as he stepped out of the shower.
"That was 10 years ago dude! Gah! Whatever man I'm leaving!" And out the door I went. I could feel a small burn of my cheeks as I went back into the living room. Seeing other people naked is embarrassing! Why isn't he embarrassed?! Does he just not care?! Probably not. This is Craig we're talking about.
I had every intention of giving him an earful when he came back out. How dare he expose himself to me like that! Yuck! But for some reason he was STILL taking his sweet ass time in the bathroom. I swear it's an everyday thing with him! Maybe he's secretly obsessed with his body. Or he's probably shaving. That's probably it. He was getting some stubble. I think I like him better with it.
So I sat there and waited. Then I laid down and waited. Than again for me minutes seems like hours. For someone who doesn't work I think it's way easier to lose track of time as well. But it was probably 20 minutes before Craig came back out of the bathroom and came to join me.
"What the hell takes you so long?" I mumbled, I'm suddenly feeling very tired. I don't sleep that much, it's hard for me. I used to rely on the medication to put me asleep. But I don't have that anymore. I usually fall asleep when Craigs here because again, what if someone breaks in while I'm sleeping?! That's scary. So when I'm finally feeling sleepy that means I'm falling asleep where ever I am. The couch, my bed, Craigs bed, one time even at a pizza place.
"Nunya." was his reply. He sat next to me, he head inches from his lap. I can smell him. He smells nice. He turns on the TV. Bobs Burgers. Nice.
"Whatever." I don't feel like talking about it anymore. Sleeps seriously hitting me like a truck. I close my eyes.
"Tweek. You yell at me for taking so long in the shower but you always fall asleep on the couch. Why did I even buy you a bed?" This time Craigs voice was gentler. Quieter. He knows whether he likes it or not I'm sleeping here again for the night.
"Hmm." I hum. I want to keep talking to him but can't. Sorry Craig.
Before the darkness settles in I feel movement on the other side of the couch. A moment later I feel a warm blanket being draped over my body and a warm hand on my head.
"Good night Tweek." That was the last thing I heard before I finally surrendered to the dark.
Days like this are good.
Sometimes I like being the pet.
Thank you so much for reading! Sorry the first chapter was so slow. Just setting up plot and backstory! Next chapter will get things moving! Please let me know how you think of it so far!