_.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:.
So close no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters
_.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:.
His mask… broken and discarded. He would no longer wear the mask, which had so long been a part of his very being, his very core. It was his protection, his solitude, his momentary safety. Shattered. It had long been put away, the broken pieces never to return to his face, nor did he want it to. He was tired of hiding; he was tired of the uselessness of it. His face would be known, his actions revered. He would fight for what he believed in, what others would want to believe in. He would be the motivation for the people, someday, somehow, with or without the help of the Gundam pilots. Whether or not they would agree, even after what he had caused, was completely up to them. War is fickle, it will choose who lives and who dies, tragedy and triumph.
"In the horror that is human hearts…" Zechs said to himself as he put the shot glass down gently on mahogany wood. The bar tender asked him if he wanted another, and the platinum-blonde haired man shook his head. One was enough; his intention was to enjoy a drink, not enough to get himself drunk. The bartender took the glass back, and then went to the next ready customer.
Zechs stood; there was nothing more he wished to accomplish at a bar. It was his night off, and to be honest, he had no idea of what to do with it. The prospect of doing absolutely nothing that would make a difference vexed him; he wondered how other people could live out normal lives thinking that they did make a difference with petty words and sad complaints. Humans…Such a strange species. Noin had urged him to wear his mask, but it would be more noticeable if he were to go out on the streets wearing a mask over his head. What would he be hiding; he was sure they would wonder. A gruesome, deformed face like that of a phantom so long ago? No, he did not possess such a face, but his past could be as deformed.
This place was strange to him, so traditional in ancient Japan he felt as if he had taken a trip back in time. He felt underdressed, to say the least, but he would not be seen walking around in their clothing. What he wore was his own business. Although the look was traditional, the weaponry being sold was amazing, the technology none to compare. Most of the Gundam and Talgeese designs were based off some of the intricate weaponry systems provided by these seemingly harmless people, seemingly harmless was hardly a term. What he did notice that surprised him was a single store, which sold a boken, a long wooden katana. He thought this strange, and at first thought it only for practice. When he asked the clerk, he was met with a surprising answer.
"The power of the blade does not win a fight; it is the power of the soul, and the discipline of the mind. It takes such a soul and mind to wield a weapon like that, both delicate and quick."
He said no more as the clerk returned behind the desk, and nor did the clerk say another word to him or even look up. Zechs looked at the boken one more time, before walking out to continue his slow-moving night of nothing. He wanted to return, Noin would lock the doors on him, insisting that he have the night off. He knew well of her feelings for him, they were as apparent as the stars that began to dot the peaceful night sky. It was not his soldier's instinct that stopped him from returning the feelings; it was not the thought of her safety from him. He just simply… Could not return the feelings the way she yearned for him to. As a friend, as a soldier, he could not find better, nor did he think he would. She would be faithful to him until the end and he had a duty to protect her, as she felt she had a duty to protect his honor and his decisions. It was an intricate system, a one-sided love, but he knew she would handle it, she would always handle it. Deep down she knew, she knew that he would never return her feelings, but her hope and her motivation was the thought that he would, so he did not tamper with such dreams. It was the war and the hope of peace that kept him alive, nothing else would. Everyone had a motivation, even though those of the Gundam pilots seemed shaded and dull, he knew. His motivation was vague, for he had no real one in which to hope for, and if that motivation was supposed to be love, he would rather do without. Would he ever be the father of children? No, he did not think so. The war would end; he would be a discarded soldier, a glory of what once was. A shell of a strong man, Zechs Merquise, not a man once known as Milliardo Peacecraft. He was not the man they claimed he was, he would never return to being that man. His new identity carried a price, a weight that only he would bear. Milliardo Peacecraft died and out of his ashes came the man whose hands will forever be stained with blood - Zechs Merquise.
It was so hard to trust, he knew it would be even harder to love. He convinced his mind that he would never know this emotion; he would never feel the warmth of a woman's body pressed against his own in an embrace the gods could not break. His passion was deeper than the ocean, brighter than the stars. It yearned to be free within him, it yearned to break the shell of the flesh and bone and be free as he only dreamed he could be. His hands and feet were bound by searing shackles, every step was agony, every movement he made they dug deeper into his flesh. He would not cry out, he would not break his steady walk. He would bear it and move on, as he always had, and he always will. His pain was too great to even think of sharing with another, even forbidden in his dreams to share.
Such dreams he had, though. Dreams of tainted beauty, skin as soft as a petal of a rose, eyes as bright as midnight fire, lips as full as his passion. A spirit as wild as the stars themselves and harder to tame than the fiercest animal. This was only in the furthest reaches of his dreams, when he had nothing more to live for he would think of such things, lips he could never taste and a love he could never hold. He would never tell this to anyone, he would consider it a weakness, to be yearning like he did. As it was in human nature to fight, it was in human nature to want to be loved and to give love. Although humans have found a way to suppress the nature to love, and use the energy to feed the nature to fight, like wild animals waiting for a kill, a sound, a movement. Waiting for a precise moment to strike, and to strike full force to wipe away the prey, the blood, the sorrow and all sound of what was. It was his duty so that this would never be - it was his duty to stop what he once thought his brother, his ally, his friend. To stop what was now a common enemy - Treize.
His thoughts of a love he could never have discarded, he continued walking on a full road. The night was young; he only wished it would end.
Author's Note - Yes, this is eventually going to turn into a Zechs/Suzuka from Outlaw Star story. Why this pairing? Good question… I wonder if someone has made a pairing like this… I am sure someone else has, I can't be the only one. I actually just thought of it… And I started writing, while listening to 'Nothing Else Matters' by Metallica over, and over, and over again… A verse will be at the top of every chapter, I wonder what I'll do when I run out of verses… Maybe I'll go into The Unforgiven. Regardless, please don't flame if you don't like this pairing. If the chapter was bad, please, flame away, but people have their own tastes. I enjoy good comments; it makes me feel like I am actually making a difference. I hope you enjoy the next chapter when I get around to writing it. Another note, this is a total Alternate Universe story. This is set in the Gundam Wing setting, Gene Starwind isn't even around. Suzuka will still be an assassin, using the boken mentioned in the above chapter. The timeline would maybe be around the time White Fang came about… But remember, this is AU, so please understand… Thank you for reading and sorry for this very long author's note, it should be author's paragraph… Oh well.
So close no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
And nothing else matters
_.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:._.:.
His mask… broken and discarded. He would no longer wear the mask, which had so long been a part of his very being, his very core. It was his protection, his solitude, his momentary safety. Shattered. It had long been put away, the broken pieces never to return to his face, nor did he want it to. He was tired of hiding; he was tired of the uselessness of it. His face would be known, his actions revered. He would fight for what he believed in, what others would want to believe in. He would be the motivation for the people, someday, somehow, with or without the help of the Gundam pilots. Whether or not they would agree, even after what he had caused, was completely up to them. War is fickle, it will choose who lives and who dies, tragedy and triumph.
"In the horror that is human hearts…" Zechs said to himself as he put the shot glass down gently on mahogany wood. The bar tender asked him if he wanted another, and the platinum-blonde haired man shook his head. One was enough; his intention was to enjoy a drink, not enough to get himself drunk. The bartender took the glass back, and then went to the next ready customer.
Zechs stood; there was nothing more he wished to accomplish at a bar. It was his night off, and to be honest, he had no idea of what to do with it. The prospect of doing absolutely nothing that would make a difference vexed him; he wondered how other people could live out normal lives thinking that they did make a difference with petty words and sad complaints. Humans…Such a strange species. Noin had urged him to wear his mask, but it would be more noticeable if he were to go out on the streets wearing a mask over his head. What would he be hiding; he was sure they would wonder. A gruesome, deformed face like that of a phantom so long ago? No, he did not possess such a face, but his past could be as deformed.
This place was strange to him, so traditional in ancient Japan he felt as if he had taken a trip back in time. He felt underdressed, to say the least, but he would not be seen walking around in their clothing. What he wore was his own business. Although the look was traditional, the weaponry being sold was amazing, the technology none to compare. Most of the Gundam and Talgeese designs were based off some of the intricate weaponry systems provided by these seemingly harmless people, seemingly harmless was hardly a term. What he did notice that surprised him was a single store, which sold a boken, a long wooden katana. He thought this strange, and at first thought it only for practice. When he asked the clerk, he was met with a surprising answer.
"The power of the blade does not win a fight; it is the power of the soul, and the discipline of the mind. It takes such a soul and mind to wield a weapon like that, both delicate and quick."
He said no more as the clerk returned behind the desk, and nor did the clerk say another word to him or even look up. Zechs looked at the boken one more time, before walking out to continue his slow-moving night of nothing. He wanted to return, Noin would lock the doors on him, insisting that he have the night off. He knew well of her feelings for him, they were as apparent as the stars that began to dot the peaceful night sky. It was not his soldier's instinct that stopped him from returning the feelings; it was not the thought of her safety from him. He just simply… Could not return the feelings the way she yearned for him to. As a friend, as a soldier, he could not find better, nor did he think he would. She would be faithful to him until the end and he had a duty to protect her, as she felt she had a duty to protect his honor and his decisions. It was an intricate system, a one-sided love, but he knew she would handle it, she would always handle it. Deep down she knew, she knew that he would never return her feelings, but her hope and her motivation was the thought that he would, so he did not tamper with such dreams. It was the war and the hope of peace that kept him alive, nothing else would. Everyone had a motivation, even though those of the Gundam pilots seemed shaded and dull, he knew. His motivation was vague, for he had no real one in which to hope for, and if that motivation was supposed to be love, he would rather do without. Would he ever be the father of children? No, he did not think so. The war would end; he would be a discarded soldier, a glory of what once was. A shell of a strong man, Zechs Merquise, not a man once known as Milliardo Peacecraft. He was not the man they claimed he was, he would never return to being that man. His new identity carried a price, a weight that only he would bear. Milliardo Peacecraft died and out of his ashes came the man whose hands will forever be stained with blood - Zechs Merquise.
It was so hard to trust, he knew it would be even harder to love. He convinced his mind that he would never know this emotion; he would never feel the warmth of a woman's body pressed against his own in an embrace the gods could not break. His passion was deeper than the ocean, brighter than the stars. It yearned to be free within him, it yearned to break the shell of the flesh and bone and be free as he only dreamed he could be. His hands and feet were bound by searing shackles, every step was agony, every movement he made they dug deeper into his flesh. He would not cry out, he would not break his steady walk. He would bear it and move on, as he always had, and he always will. His pain was too great to even think of sharing with another, even forbidden in his dreams to share.
Such dreams he had, though. Dreams of tainted beauty, skin as soft as a petal of a rose, eyes as bright as midnight fire, lips as full as his passion. A spirit as wild as the stars themselves and harder to tame than the fiercest animal. This was only in the furthest reaches of his dreams, when he had nothing more to live for he would think of such things, lips he could never taste and a love he could never hold. He would never tell this to anyone, he would consider it a weakness, to be yearning like he did. As it was in human nature to fight, it was in human nature to want to be loved and to give love. Although humans have found a way to suppress the nature to love, and use the energy to feed the nature to fight, like wild animals waiting for a kill, a sound, a movement. Waiting for a precise moment to strike, and to strike full force to wipe away the prey, the blood, the sorrow and all sound of what was. It was his duty so that this would never be - it was his duty to stop what he once thought his brother, his ally, his friend. To stop what was now a common enemy - Treize.
His thoughts of a love he could never have discarded, he continued walking on a full road. The night was young; he only wished it would end.
Author's Note - Yes, this is eventually going to turn into a Zechs/Suzuka from Outlaw Star story. Why this pairing? Good question… I wonder if someone has made a pairing like this… I am sure someone else has, I can't be the only one. I actually just thought of it… And I started writing, while listening to 'Nothing Else Matters' by Metallica over, and over, and over again… A verse will be at the top of every chapter, I wonder what I'll do when I run out of verses… Maybe I'll go into The Unforgiven. Regardless, please don't flame if you don't like this pairing. If the chapter was bad, please, flame away, but people have their own tastes. I enjoy good comments; it makes me feel like I am actually making a difference. I hope you enjoy the next chapter when I get around to writing it. Another note, this is a total Alternate Universe story. This is set in the Gundam Wing setting, Gene Starwind isn't even around. Suzuka will still be an assassin, using the boken mentioned in the above chapter. The timeline would maybe be around the time White Fang came about… But remember, this is AU, so please understand… Thank you for reading and sorry for this very long author's note, it should be author's paragraph… Oh well.