Title: Everlasting

Rating: K+

Summery: The 10th Doctor reviews the moments of regeneration in attempt to figure why he can still remember his previous incarnation on a December night in London. (slight 10/Rose)

Authors Note: More Ten/Rose fictions! This has to be driving most people insane, so I tried to take a different approach to it; coated in slight angst, but the story takes place a few months after the regeneration. It's also during the time of The Christmas Invasion, my own little musing based off pictures on the web. It took awhile for me to name this fic, so I'll probably be renaming it later. This was intended to be a one-shot but I may continue if I can find some more inspiration.

He frowned in frustration at the console of the TARDIS. The ship creaked and shifted to answer his frustration but he waved it off and went back to studying the console. He kicked the bottom of it lightly, trying to find anything imperfect with it. However the ship repeated its earlier actions but harsher and louder in protest. He lifted his eyebrow and looked up at the ceiling of the console room. The TARDIS shifted again, creaking and settling.

He sighed and opened up the floor panel and removed his blue bathrobe, placing it over the railing. He slipped into the now opened compartment, looking around at the settings below. The TARDIS let out a small electric field as his fingers brushed against the instrument.

He sighed, aggravated and looked up at the ceiling with a slight glare. "You aren't being very helpful in all of this, you know." He spoke to her. The ship creaked softly like a scorned child. "Good girl, now why don't you tell daddy what's wrong with you so we can be on our way?" he raised his eyebrow as the ship shifted. "What do you mean by that?" the ship creaked and he sighed, putting his forehead to the compartments entrance and banged it slightly. He didn't need a temperamental ship at the moment. However he pulled himself up and closed the compartment, putting his hands on his hips as he looked up at the ceiling again. Giving in with a sigh he fell back into the chair in front of the console, folding his hands across his chest and his feet up on the console as his mind began to think of what could be making the TARDIS act up this time.

Ever since the regeneration things had been different, of course that happened every time. Rose had been skeptical at first, untrusting and unsure, but she had slowly adjusted. He wasn't sure if she had just accepted him now or if she had really figured out what regeneration was. Either way he was now stuck on the blue little planet she was from, waiting for her to come back. After a month of traveling with him she asked to go home and see her mother, which of course he complied. Shortly after Rose left however the TARDIS began to act up. He'd run simulations which all turned up negative on physical damages, leaving him to believe the TARDIS had decided to sit back and get used to the new Doctor. Yet the TARDIS had seen him do this nine times now, he'd think she'd be used to it. However the constant creaking and shifting directed him to believe otherwise. The TARDIS was trying to adapt herself to the new way the Doctor thought and moved, his interests and destinations he would like to go to. Yet whenever he confronted his age old companion she shifted and creaked as if she didn't want to answer. He had groaned, hoping that Rose wasn't affecting the some-what personality the ship seemed to have.

However the thought of the TARDIS led him back to the nagging question in his mind. When regeneration took place he would usually loose his memories of his previous self, but after the first few days most of them had returned. There were times here and there more would come to him and he would seem to daze out into space as he relived the moments in his head. He had explained to Rose that it was perfectly normal for Time Lords, however at the time Rose had disagreed. It seemed like Rose had a preconceived idea of exactly what a Time Lord should be like, and when it turned out to be wrong, she was angry at herself and taking it out on the Doctor and the TARDIS. The Doctor shook his head, remembering the dents the Earth woman had placed into the TARDIS when she threw her fits, and how angry the TARDIS was. He was stuck between two women having an ugly war and he couldn't seem to sway either of them. The TARDIS, in her own ways, was trying to show Rose what to do in these moments and explain, while Rose ignored and just answered by making rather large dents into the ship. Oh that had been a nightmare to fix.

His thoughts found his way back to the process of regeneration and how it had changed. He had already decided that it wasn't because of Rose. After all he had many other companions and it had never affected the process before. However now as he sat there, contemplating, he noticed that more memories from his earlier lives were coming back to him. It was odd at first, but now he slipped simply into the previous roles of himself and relived the memories. He shifted in his chair and leaned his head against the back of the chair, once again going over the moments before the regeneration.

Daleks, hmm they had become quiet a problem hadn't they? Rose had returned in the TARIDS, possessed by the Time Vortex which was the heart of the ship, and destroyed the Daleks. She explained the meaning of Bad Wolf, which was certainly not what he thought it would be. Despite all the other things going on at the time, Rose was going to die. The only thing that could handle a Time Vortex was and is the TARDIS, and it would kill anything else. A simple kiss was what it took to remove the Time Vortex and replace it into the TARDIS before he took her inside. He then went on about dogs with no noses and planets that he would have taken to her. Maybe he shouldn't have said that, it just caused the poor Earth-woman to be scared. He then regenerated and felt disorientated which of course was completely normal for a Time Lord. Rose of course had been shocked and helpless; then again he should have explained it much earlier.

The Doctor frowned a bit in thought, going over the moments in his mind again. Everything worked like it should be. He would have died instead he activated the process; it worked fine, except that he remembered. He was puzzled by it all; it didn't seem to add up. There was something missing in the equation, a variable that wasn't supposed to be there. He shifted in his seat again, going over the moments over and over trying to figure the wrongly placed variable.

The TARDIS creaked again. He looked up, listening as the ship shifted and creaking, speaking in her own dialect to help his chaotic mind calm. As he listened he didn't realize the door had opened slowly and close softly. He didn't notice the soft footsteps of his companion come up the ramp to the console or notice her stand beside him and watch him. His attention was focused on the story that his ship was relying to him through her own language. However he must have noticed she was there because his hand came from where it rested on his chest to grab hers and hold it tightly. His companion looked at him oddly, looking up at where he was looking but she couldn't see what he saw.

"Do you hear that?" he asked and she looked at him. "The small voice in the back of your mind, speaking to you in something you can't understand, but you still know what its saying?" His voice was softy and expressive like it had been that fateful day he had taken her hand and taught her about how the world revolved through space. She tilted her head as he broke his gaze at the ceiling of the TARDIS and looked directly at her, into her eyes.

"Do you know what the TARDIS is?" he asked suddenly.

"It's a ship." She answered. "It goes in time, wherever and whenever you want. It has a heart and a mind as well."

"That's just the basics of a TARDIS." He explained, drawing her attention up to the ceiling of the room. "It's not just a box with a key that's bigger on the inside than the out for a disguise." He looked at her as she studied the ceiling for what he was looking for. "That's just what the TARDIS needs, Rose. The TARDIS is truly a living thing, something that looks after both you and me and the better for both of us and any companion that waltzes through that door." He stopped slouching and pulled himself to stand. Rose looked at him as the Doctor placed his blue bathrobe on.

"So what you're telling me is that the TARDIS…."

"Is alive and wants to help anything and anyone regardless of race, birthplace, color, or anything." He put his hands on her arms and smiled. "Rose, do you know what this means?" Rose shook her head. "I know Rose! I know why now!"

"Know what?" she was confused and didn't understand.

"How I remembered!" He said gaily like a child at Christmas. "How and why I can remember everything I've done, who I've met, where I've been, oh Rose it's so fantastic!" She returned the smile that had formed on his face; it had been a long time since she had seen him this ecstatic about anything. It was just like when she had first met him, full of the sense of just being alive. He quickly walked past her and went to the doors of the TARDIS but stopped, half turned, and held his hand out for her. She didn't hesitate and took his hand, walking outside into the cold December air. Her shoes and his slippers crunched into the fallen snow and he looked up at the sky, holding her hand tightly.

"So," Rose looked up at him and he looked down at her. The street lights came on, the city slowly changing into a sleeping one except for the late night Christmas shoppers. "Are we still clinging to the skin of this little planet as we fall through time, just you and me?" she smiled as he did.

"Not just this one, but thousands of planets." He stated as he looked up, pointing to the sky. Rose looked up seeing the moon hiding behind the clouds as the stars twinkled through them. "Thousands of stars and planets all clinging together as we fall all at the same time through it all." He looked back down at her and the wonder that crossed her face as it always had. Even now the thought of so many places seemed to still amaze her.

"And you know this because you remember?" Rose asked. The Doctor looked down at her, and smiled as he squeezed her hand.

"I've always known it, its part of being a Time Lord." He responded but turned her to face him. "It was the TARDIS, Rose, she did it!"

"What did she do?" Rose was still unsure of what he was talking about.

"The Time Vortex, Rose, think about it!" He said hastily, trying to get her to work it out on her own. He knew he could, she was intelligent, and however he was unsure of how much she remembered from the Time Vortex. She bit her bottom lip, thinking before turning her attention back to him. He smiled at her. "Rose, the Time Vortex is everything that has happened, that will happen, and that can happen, all at once. No one and nothing but the TARDIS can handle that, Rose do you understand?" She nodded. "I remember because of the Time Vortex! Isn't it wonderful Rose?"

"Wait, slow down." She held her hands up and it took him a moment to wind down. "You're telling me that when you absorbed the Time Vortex it made you remember?"

"Almost." The Doctor smiled, taking her hands and putting them down. "You see Rose; the power of the Time Vortex is what caused my regeneration. That means that it had also altered the process some how, an unknown appearing variable in the greater equation that affected the answer. Because it was the Time Vortex that caused it all, that affected this version of me. Because of it I can remember everything I've done, I've seen, and everyone I've met more clearly than ever." Rose nodded slowly, coming to an understanding of the beaming man before her.

"But you're still different." She said and his smile slipped as he blinked.

"Of course." He answered. "That doesn't change. My interests and personality might be altered, Rose Tyler, but I am still the same person I've been for over thousands of years. I'm still the Doctor, just a bit different." He paused as she stared at him. "That is alright isn't it?"

Rose shifted in the snow and a smirk found its way on her face. "Well it doesn't matter does it? It's a normal Time Lord thing even if I don't fully think its alright." He didn't smile but frowned. She rolled her eyes at him and reached up, ruffling his longer hair. He blinked, confused but interested in the motion. She smiled, knowing what he was saying was true. He was still giddy about adventures and saving people, easily excited over something he had discovered. He was still the Doctor.

"You're still you." She concluded, bringing him from whichever thoughts he was pondering at the moment. "You're still the Doctor, just in a pretty new package….but you don't have a bow." She smirked and he raised his eyebrow at her. Rose blinked as a snow flake landed on her nose. She raised her hand and moved the water off her face then looked around as the snow continued to pile around.

"Hmm." He was studying the area around them as well. "We should get something warm, it'll be freezing here in a moment." He looked at her. "What do you want?"

Rose looked over her shoulder at a small coffee shop nearby. "How about some hot chocolate?" He looked over at where he was, then down at his attire of his pajamas and bathrobe. Rose laughed and wrapped her arm around his. "Oh come on people are always going to the coffee shops in their sleepers, Doctor, don't be so embarrassed about it. Drinks on me."

The Doctor looked at her oddly. "I don't think so Rose Tyler." Rose looked up at him, confused. "What kind of date would I be letting the lady pay?" he smiled widely as she stood perplexed. "I was able to find some extra pounds around your mother's apartment, now let's go before we freeze to death." Rose laughed and put her head on his arm as they walked together to the lit coffee shop as the snow continued to fall.