Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or places...[unfortunately, wish I had Draco and Harry] they all belong to the brilliant lady- J.K. Rowling. The only thing I owned would be the plot.
Love was not enough
They never talked about it. Not at the beginning and not at the end. There wasn't much to talk about. Both of them knew their fate, the roads that had been laid for them. His was the steps of his father, a road that he cannot, will not, sway from in his search for power, and hers was with her best friends, destined to lead the frontline of the Second war. They don't know why they started it, knowing that it was doomed from the beginning. But they did. Call it a fatal attraction, their need to taste the forbidden. Or maybe it was the knowledge of their last freedom that they have in Hogwarts before entering the treacherous world, taking their sides in the war.
They were both head students, sharing a common room. It was a fight of wits and intelligence in the beginning, both battling for victory in verbal spars and academics. Then it changed somehow, into mild flirting, which escalated in a short amount of time. Before they knew it, they were holding hands and kissing behind their friends and housemates back.
During those times, she really enjoyed his company. He was a book that only opens at occasions. But in that few times that it opened, it had captured her attention and intrigued her to find out more. To understand his story. He was also a friend, someone she could open up, some one who shared the same insecurities that she had of the world, he was someone who truly understands her thrive for knowledge and the wisdom behind the line, "Knowledge is power". He was her lover too, the boy that had captured her heart in the beginning with his world weary words, and the man she had learnt to love for all his faults as much as her best friends. She had hoped. She had hoped that she meant the world to him as he meant to her and prayed to the deities above every time he held her.
She prayed for the moment to last forever. She prayed that his strong comforting arms would hold her, only her, till the end of time. She prayed that he would remain hers for all eternity. Above all, she prayed that he would not take his path; that her love for him would be strong enough to guide him away from that path, the path of destruction; the road that holds power that he would surely inherit through birthright if he chooses that road.
Many nights, she observed and it truly seemed like that he had left that path. He looked and acted as if he was ready to walk besides her: through thick and thin, through whatever end that was bestowed upon her. She was happy, elated to have him by her side. She was happy until that fateful evening. It is still fresh in her mind after two years on pondering, fighting and surviving.
That evening, she was sitting in front of the fire of the common room. Although, it was June, the weather was rather chilly that year. It was the night before the graduation. She was preparing her speech for the next day as it was traditions. He was in his room. Late in the evening, when she was about to finish her notes, he walked out of his room. He headed over to her.
"Hey." She greeted him from her coach. He did not reply, just smiled that soft, sad smile as his eyes shone in that steely blue. As he always did. He never really smiled, only smirked. But then again, there wasn't much for him in his life to smile for. All he could offer was that smile. She was satisfied, very satisfied, for at the least, she knew that smile was for her.
He leaned over, and placed a soft kiss on her mouth. She leaned into the kiss, trying to deepen it. But he pulled back and stepped away. She looked at him with confused eyes; he had never minded when she took the initiative.
"What's wrong?" she asked concerned. In the fire illuminated room, he did seem paler than normal.
He shook his head slightly and gave her another of his smiles. He then opened his mouth and with his tenor, bordering on alto, voice said, "I'm going out tonight. You don't have to wait for me."
"Oh." She said, "You've done you speech for tomorrow?"
He nodded then headed for the entrance of their common room. He, in his liquid movements, opened the portrait. He was half way out of the entrance before he turned back, sincere shone in his eyes, "One more thing; believe me when I say that you mean the world to me and that you're the only person that I care about."
He flashed a smile at her, this time she returned, and left the room. Walking out of her sight. She was confused for it was odd. Odd that he was so...open about his feelings. She was always the one who spoke her feelings. The one who expressed their relationship. She never said the L word for she dared not to. But when she told him that she cared, he always smiled that smile of his. A smile that told so much, yet nothing at all.
She pondered for a while longer before retiring to her room. She finished the last of her packing and went into a deep slumber. She wanted to look the best for him, and many others, tomorrow at graduation.
xxXxx
The morning came too quick. When she woke up, she prepared herself for her final day at the school that she had called home for the last seven years. Unsuspectingly.
She went to his room to check. His bed was made, his belongings packed. But he was nowhere to be found. She thought he must have gone to breakfast already. So she hurried out of the common room and to the Great hall.
The Great hall was beautifully decorated to celebrate the last day of the school year. Most of the teachers were present already and interacting politely with each other. All students were excited, especially the sixth years.
However, despite all the excitement, most of the seven years had a cloud of solemnity surrounding them. They all knew what that day meant. The last day of their childhood. The last of their freedom.
She walked over to her best friends. They were especially gloom that day. Although they looked as elated as every seventh years, she could feel the somberness. Tomorrow, the three of them would be officially on the frontline, as fate told them to. She sat down between them and stated to pick her breakfast.
"G' Morning." Greeted one of them. "Excited?"
"Very."
"So got your speech done?" the other asked.
"What did you expect?" she looked at them appalled. Then her eyes crinkled in mirth and she punched him good naturedly.
"Just checking. No need to get violent!" her friend grinned.
After fooling around a bit longer, they went back to their breakfast. She then peeked a look at the table across the hall, trying to find him. He wasn't there. Disappointed she went back to her food, without her best friends noticing her disappointment.
When she was finished with her meal, she rose to leave her friends, claiming that she had to do some last minute changes to her speech. Her friends nodded, laughing that it was so like their Hermione to something like that. She smiled fondly at them. They were always her best friends and she loved the two boys, no, men dearly. She took a second look around the Great hall, taking in all she could as it would be some time until she saw it again.
When she took a second look, she noticed that Professor Snape look ghastly white and instead of sitting at the end of the table, which was where he preferred all those years, he was next to Professor Dumbledore, whispering to the Headmaster at center of the table. She stared at the unusual situation. And as if Snape knew her eyes were upon him, he looked up. He looked sadly at her and rose from his place.
Just then, the doors of the Great hall opened. She watched her lover walk in. He looked even paler than last night and his face was tight with what she thought might have been weariness...or even pain. And instead of his fluid movements, that morning, he seemed a bit stiff. He didn't look at anyone, not her, not his mentor, but made his way directly to his table. He sat in the middle of his table, as it was his rightful seat since he became head boy, leader of his house. She watched his friends, maybe not even friends but acquaintances, patted him on his back but he shrugged their hands off. She tried to catch his eyes, but he refused to look beyond his table.
Giving up, she looked back at the staff table; Professor Snape was looking at him too. Dark eyes dull yet filled with emotion. She made her way towards the exit, when she heard a voice calling her.
"I would like a word with you about your apprenticeship next term." Said Professor Snape. It had shocked him when she decided to take up Potion, claiming that she enjoyed his lessons. Although he looked grudging when he accepted her application, but she knew that he was more than willing to teach her as he was giving her extra information on the potions that they brewed in class ever since.
She waited for Professor Snape to catch up. Then she followed him towards his office. Inside his office, she was offered a seat while he poured himself some alcohols. He offered her some too, but she refused politely, saying it was too early in the day for her to be wasted.
He raised the wards around the room. He then sat down behind his desk and took a swig of the brown liquid, assumable as brandy, and sighed.
"Professor, what is it that you wish to talk to about? I know it's not about my apprenticeship, we've been through that last week on the details." She was getting nervous. So nervous that she was aware of the ticking clock, roaring of the fire, bubbling inside the cauldrons. Even her own heartbeat.
The Professor looked at her, his foremost protégé, with eyes full of regrets and pain and said those heavy words, "He took his place besides the Dark Lord last night."
She had always thought that those scenes from the movies, when unwanted news had been expressed, were mere exaggeration. How could some news had such a dramatic affect to the surrounding and the characters. But she knew otherwise now.
When those words left the lips of Professor Snape, everything was stilled. It seems that the clock, the fire, the bubbling had stopped. Her own heartbeat seemed to stop too. But all of a sudden, everything came back to life and the noises roared in her ears, turmoil clouded in her mind.
"He did, didn't he?" she said weakly. No explaining of who 'he' was. Both of them knew very well. But why was she surprised? Why did it felt like the world just collapsed onto her? Did she really truly believe that he would sway from that path? Did she honestly believe that their relationship could survive this war?
Professor Snape nodded solemnly. No other words were exchange. None were needed. She stood up and excused herself from his office with his eyes looking sympathetically at her as he was the only one who knew about their romance. She was, fortunate or unfortunately, never the one for denial...or tears.
xxXxx
Suddenly, everything made sense now. Those eyes full of turmoil, the kiss...and those words. It made sense. It was like her gift, a fair well gift. She walked away from the dungeons, the lair for him and his 'friends'. Things seemed so blurred, many of her friends walked up to her as she made her way to their room. Their words never reached her, for her brain was buzzing and ticking, like a bomb ready to explode. She just allowed her mouth to work and then excused herself with a polite nod.
When she was back into the Head's Common Room, she sat in front of the mantelpiece and stared. She wasn't staring at anything, she was just staring. Her mind was blank, not that she wanted to think at all. She couldn't afford to. Knowing that everything, every memory that she could think of would somehow relate to him. And the mere thought of him would bring unwanted tears into her eyes.
He never returned to this room once. Probably not since his departure last night. Not that she minded. She wouldn't know how to face him. She needed times to collect her thoughts. She needed to compose herself before their confrontation, their last talk. She sat there, and waited for time to pass. She waited until she heard banging on the door and her friends hurried her to the graduation ceremony in the Great Hall.
The event passed rather quickly, much to her dismay, for she was quite numb during the entire festive. She received her certificate and awards, as a student with great contribution to the school her years and the student with the highest grades since the 70's. Then it was the speeches of the Head of House, and then it was Professor Dumbledore...and finally, the speeches of the Head Students. She made hers and he his.
After their speeches, the ceremony came to a close, and the seventh year students mingled. One last time, as students of such a great school. Some will see each other later on in life, but for some, it may be the last time they'd see the others...be in a personal choice...or the fact that they all knew not every one would survive this war...
She stayed as long as she could bear in the Great Hall, she talked with different friends. Promising to stay in contact o simply talking about the plans of the holidays. Finally, she excused herself from her best friends, promised to meet them when the train leaves and get on with them, and made her way to the Common Room one last time. To Check if the house elves had deliver every of her belongings into train...and maybe, a confrontation.
He was there when she opened the portrait and entered the spacious room. She stared at him, slightly shocked. Then she averted her gaze, unable to meet his eyes.
"I thought you would want to spend times with Potter and Weasley." He said casually.
She made no reply, so he continued speaking:
"I guess this is it, isn't it? That was quite a fast seven years, don't you think?" he smiled wryly. "I used to think that I would never finish the seven years here...chuckle but guess I was wrong...So are you planning to spend the summer with Potter and Weasley, before returning here for you apprenticeship with Snape?"
"Why?"
He raised his eyebrow. "What do you mean 'why'?"
He walked up to her and embraced her. "Hmm, Hermione?"
His warm embrace felt hot this time. Scorching hot. She pushed herself out of his arms. Instead of feeling secure and comfort. His arms seemed to suffocate her, even though they were loosely wrapped around her.
She tucked on his left sleeves and reviewed an ugly black mark on his forearm. So dark and dominating on his pale skin. The lumbering evil. His side. His decision. His path.
Their fate.
"Why did you join?"
"News travel fast, don't they?" he said calming, avoiding her eyes, and fixing his sleeve, hiding the Dark Mark beneath the thin fabric.
"Yes, they do." Her voice was tight with raw emotions.
"It was my path all along. My road had been laid for me the moment I entered the world. It's a trap I've been borne into. And I'll turn the trap into something that will make me great! I don't have another choice. I don't have another way out. I have nothing else. You understand that, right?"
She looked at him incredulously. How could she understand? She thought he loved her, like how she loved him. She thought he would abandon that evil, horrid man and be her lover, the man who would stand by her.
"But...but, you'll still have me!" she said desperately. "I don't care if you're great or not! I love you! I'll stand next to you!"
"Then join me. Join me, so we can be great together."
She stared at him. His steel blue eyes. The tenderness he had for her was still there, but there was something else too, something very dominating. Ambitions. Ambitions were blazing in his eyes.
"What happened last night?"
"He said I will be great, that I will be his strongest man. He said that I will be more powerful than my father, than any of his Death Eaters! He said that I will be his heir, right hand man, and I shall have all the powers..." His eyes continued to glow with what looked to her was...joy. "Hermione, you should have seen that pure look of horror in my father's face...just imagine when I actually destroy him! You'll be my queen! We can be together ruling the world..."
"But at what price?" she asked softly. "I can't. All that I hold dear will be gone if...Voldemort comes into power."
"You'll still have me! I'll be there for you, like you will for me! Join me."
"I can't, I'm sorry. That will not be a cause that I believe it, you know that."
"Yes, you've always fought for things that you believe in..." his eyes now dimmed with disappointment. "Then..."
"I guess this is goodbye..."
"Yes...but..."
"No. Please don't make this hard for me and you. You've chosen your path, and I can't follow. I won't follow. I will respect your choice, though. This is all I can offer..."
"But I love you, Hermione!"
"Please," Her sorrowful eyes and mouth begged, "don't make this harder than it is! I love you too! But I guess...love is not enough. It's not enough to keep you with me...I'm sorry it has to end this way...but goodbye!"
She turned her back and headed down the stairs to the portrait. She left through the portrait. She stood in front of the entrance waiting for the portrait to close. Then right before the portal closed, she heard him said, "Fair well, Hermione. Until next time."
Indeed, until next time. She thought sadly. But when we meet again, we'll not be lovers, but enemy, soldiers of different fronts.
She tried her best to control her emotions; she was not going to break down, not while she's in Hogwarts and not while he's still close. She made her way back to the Great Hall, where she had promised to meet Harry and Ron. They were already there, waiting. Ron was looking a bit impatient too.
"Well, took you long enough." Complained Ron.
"He thought you were kidnapped by some Slytherin or something." Smiled Harry. "He was about to make his way to find you."
She smiled. They were the constants in her life. She could always rely on them. Her best friends. Her brothers. Her beacons of Light.
They made their way to the Hogwarts Express, one last time as students. When they reached the station, Hagrid gave them a huge hug and made them promise to visit him or else he'd send Fluffy to find them. The trio grinned and made their promise. When they were finally settled in a compartment discussing excitedly about their vacation to California, the train started, signaling the end of the school year.
Ron and Harry were playing chess. After seven years, Harry was still unable to beat Ron. She sat there, gazing out of the window and watched the magnificent castle of Hogwarts disappear from her eyes. Then finally, she let her emotions run.
Tears ran like river. Sorrowful sobs tore from her throat.
Harry and Ron immediately panicked. They moved close to their best friend and enveloped her into a hug, asking her what was wrong. She did not say anything, just cried.
As her tears stopped, Ron in attempt to lighten up the mood, joked: "C'mon 'Mione, we know you love Hogwarts, but you're returning next year anyways!"
"But love is not enough." She whispered and fell asleep in her friends' hug. The boys looked at each other. Neither of them understood what she had meant. But sensing it was a sad topic, they did not press her.
xxXxx
When she woke up from her slumber, the train arrived. Harry and Ron had already packed their hand-carried belongings and were ushering her off the train. The two boys ran towards the barrier, where on the other side a new stage of their lives began. She herself walked slowly, lingering in her last moments of childhood and her lost love.
"Goodbye, Draco Malfoy." She whispered, hoping that the wind would carry her words to him, before going through the barrier.
A/N: C'est fini!! Well this is my first One-Shot! I hope you like it! And please REVIEW! If I get enough reviews, I might [keyword: might] write and sequel!