Disclaimer: I own my anger and frustration but I don't own anything else. Then again maybe my anger and frustration own me.

Warning: future Kai x Tyson, possible mentions of Ray x Max, and a tragic, but kind of happy ending

Chapter 1

Going Under

The wind howled and rain poured down heavily on the town, but no one was awake to hear it, all except one. One heard the thunder crack and saw the lightening flash through the sky, matching his mood. Tyson sat alone in his bedroom wide-awake only thinking about the past few weeks, and the past few years. He had done so many things in his short life but none of them mattered. How could any of the things he'd done matter when he kept getting hurt and betrayed by the people closest to him? Time and again Kai had betrayed him, and then eventually his whole team deserted him when the world championships took place again.

There would be times when he could forget about all that had happened and feel at peace with the world around him, but then he would be left alone or be reminded of what happened and he would become a mess. No he wasn't a self-mutilator, but he would lose control and either break something to rid himself of his anger, or burst into tears to make the anguish he felt disappear faster. No one knew how he felt, and if he continued to wear his mask of false bliss no one ever would.

"Kai," Tyson murmured, though no one was awake to hear it, and even if someone was it would be muffled by his arms that he had buried his head in. Kai had recently announced he was leaving to train, but when Tyson tried to talk him out of it the dual haired boy had lashed out at him with a vengeance. The older boy had told Tyson that he was stupid, arrogant, worthless, annoying, and that more than half the reason as to why he was leaving was because of the holder of Dragoon, but the dual haired boy had said it in a more cruel way.

Arms resting on his knees and face buried in them Tyson let the anger, frustration, sadness, and emptiness sink in. He was angry Kai had said all those things. Frustration consumed him because he knew Kai had been right, and his words were true. Sadness, because he had been hurt and once again, even if Kai hadn't meant to, he had betrayed Tyson. The one emotion Tyson hated though was emptiness. It made him feel hollow and his body seemed to become hard and be closing in on its self.

"Why?" Tyson asked in a weak whisper to himself. "Why? What did I do to make him hate me so much? Why does he always betray me, and why did my other friends, and why did my brother? Why? What did I do?" Anger caked his voice as he continued. Removing his face from the protection of his arms he looked up at his ceiling and glared at it with such fierceness that even Kai would flinch at the sight. "Why! What did I ever do to them! Why do I let them call themselves my friends when they clearly aren't! Why is it the pain just never seems to end! Why can't things be the way they used to be, or were they always this way and only now I notice! Why me!"

Tears of bitter resentment flowed down Tyson's tan cheeks, but just as suddenly as Tyson's anger appeared it left and was replaced with hysterically happiness. A chuckle left Tyson's lips. "Oh joy! Look at me now. Crying like an idiot, Kai's right, he's always right." Looking down at his bed-sheets Tyson smiled sadly. "Why am I so weak? Why do I feel like this?" More laughs came as he began to twist his bed cover around his fist. "Kai is right. No wonder everyone wants to hurt me so bad. I'm a blemish on the face of the earth."

Breathing deeply Tyson continued to think of all the things that had happened to him, but somehow he always missed the happy moments or his mind would twist them around into memories of anguish. It wasn't until his body felt numb did he get up from his bed and move over to his dresser and look at all the pictures that littered it. In every picture he was in he was always smiling, but he knew that most of those smiles had been fake.

Seeing a picture of his whole team together smiling made his body feel as if it had been engulfed by flames and he wanted nothing more then to smash it, no, more then that. He wanted to stab it, shred it, burn it, take a bomb and have it explode, scream all his frustrations at it. He wanted destruction and chaos. He wanted it all to disappear, but it never would.

The once howling wind began to die down and the pounding of water had become soft, but the storm inside Tyson had only begun. Screaming he threw the picture to the ground and punched it. Glass spewed across the floor and Tyson's knuckles bled from the abuse, but before rushing to the bathroom for bandages he stood there glaring at the thing that had enraged him. He didn't have to worry about his grandpa hearing him because his grandfather was out with an old friend and wasn't going to be back until sometime in the afternoon tomorrow.

Taking notice of the bleeding he went to the bathroom and searched through the cabinets. Not really caring if he made a mess he tossed things around until he came across the first aid kit. Taking what he needed he wrapped the bandages around his knuckles, and without even bothering to put the kit away he left the dojo dressed in his usual attire. He needed to get out of there, it was too suffocating.

It was still raining, but he didn't care. It cooled him down and made him feel refreshed and relaxed, but at the same time it made his heart grow colder whenever a thought about his family and friends. "No don't," Tyson said as he tried to shake his head clear of the thoughts. "Yes they did all at one point turn against me, and they don't always act like friends, but they are. They are," he said, as his voice grew more desperate. "Grandpa cares and so does Hiro, and everyone else."

Oh yeah, I little voice in Tyson's head spoke. Your friends don't care. They only see you as an opponent, and what better way than to learn your opponent's weakness, than by being around them. They don't care.

Tyson stopped walking abruptly, the voice was right. Why didn't he see it before, but he still had Hiro and his grandpa.

Is that what you think? The voice questioned. Your brother is never around and when he is he never treats you like a brother, and not only that but he betrayed you when he joined Bega. As for your grandpa, come on I know you have to train and all, but don't you think he over does it? Honestly, everyday? You show great skill already so why attack everyday? Why not once or twice a week?

"I-I-I don't know," Tyson stuttered on his words. Could it be true? He had his doubts about their love and friendship, but could it be the truth. As he thought about it he couldn't deny it. It was the truth. It had to be, everything made sense. In shock he stood in that same spot until the first ray of light broke and he knew he hadn't slept an ounce the night before. If it were all true then he would be prepared. He wouldn't let himself get too close. He would distance himself, but in a slow way so no one would notice. Gazing out at the sun Tyson knew what was to come but he no longer cared, he just didn't want to feel the hurt and betrayal anymore. "I'll stop this on my own. I can't be hurt anymore or I think I'll lose what little sanity I have left."

X.X.X.X.X.X.X.

Akira: I hope you all enjoyed this and for those of you who read my other fics, don't complain because you are obviously reading this, which means I'm still writing something your reading. Of course if you're not reading this then you don't know it exist so I don't see why you would complain.